Sin of lust

[Lea101]

Does anyone find that other sins are way easier to avoid except for lust?

My friend kind of brought her opinion about how it’s impossible to avoid lust. I mean, you can lust for 10 seconds and then stop and feel regret, but you basically just committed a mortal sin and you’re pretty much separated from God.

And then you have people who are not sure whether it was just sexual desire or lust.

This sin is so confusing, I don’t even know how to explain it to my friend?

 

[LethalMouse]

Does anyone find that other sins are way easier to avoid except for lust?

Yes. Because it is not really inherently sinful. It is an out of order sin,

My friend kind of brought her opinion about how it’s impossible to avoid lust. I mean, you can lust for 10 seconds and then stop and feel regret, but you basically just committed a mortal sin and you’re pretty much separated from God.

No no no… First off passing uncontrolled lust is by nature venial. Lust in the way that “thought” is mortal is to realize what you are thinking, realize its sinfulness, and then decide to indulge it further.

And I think you may be taking the “separated from God” a bit too far.

And then you have people who are not sure whether it was just sexual desire or lust.

Lust is more so a factor when disordered. But regardless, You are talking about someone unsure of what they are involved in, again, by nature not mortal sin.

This sin is so confusing, I don’t even know how to explain it to my friend?

Everyone can just calm down! lol. Soo many people see religion as the “everything is a sin and we are all going to hell and we all suck”

NO, everyone stop that and just relax

Focus on the small and slowly learn yourself and the situation. Focus on loving God and let that be prime. You can start of with lust in its simplest form:

Don’t be getting all up on a dude
And don’t spend hours mentally imagining every detail of getting all up on a dude

then discuss your learning concerns with a priest

Then go forth and glorify God

 

[Lea101]

Yes. Because it is not really inherently sinful. It is an out of order sin,

No no no… First off passing uncontrolled lust is by nature venial. Lust in the way that “thought” is mortal is to realize what you are thinking, realize its sinfulness, and then decide to indulge it further.

And I think you may be taking the “separated from God” a bit too far.

Lust is more so a factor when disordered. But regardless, You are talking about someone unsure of what they are involved in, again, by nature not mortal sin.

Everyone can just calm down! lol. Soo many people see religion as the “everything is a sin and we are all going to hell and we all suck”

NO, everyone stop that and just relax

Focus on the small and slowly learn yourself and the situation. Focus on loving God and let that be prime. You can start of with lust in its simplest form:

Don’t be getting all up on a dude
And don’t spend hours mentally imagining every detail of getting all up on a dude

then discuss your learning concerns with a priest

Then go forth and glorify God

Wouldn’t uncontrolled lust just be sexual desire (and that’s not a sin)

The “separated from god” thing was from my friend, she says it’s in the catechism. I don’t know though.

Good points, as usual

 

[JosephHope]

Welcome to my life, I am a porn addict, probably with OCD and other disorders who has what is called in that universe “jeans fetichism”, meaning I get to look at any girl wearing such, can you believe how hard not to look especially that everyone wears jeans.

In my last confessions, priests have told me to stop worrying about mortal and venial, trust Jesus and pray that He delivers us from fear.

 

[LethalMouse]

Wouldn’t uncontrolled lust just be sexual desire (and that’s not a sin)

The “separated from god” thing was from my friend, she says it’s in the catechism. I don’t know though.

Good points, as usual

Yes generally

I believe it is, but the applications and implications that people think are at issue.

For her to see a nice looking man and think in passing about an embrace and then think that she is cut of from God is where too many people go in their minds

I fights scruples if I see 'em lol :knight2:

 

[Tim_D]

I mean, you can lust for 10 seconds and then stop and feel regret, but you basically just committed a mortal sin and you’re pretty much separated from God.

Please, people need to stop thinking that sin and loss of grace is as formulaic as an algebra equation. That if you do “x” and “y,” then x+y= mortal sin and that if you die without going to confession you will go to hell for all eternity.

Give God a little more credit than that.

Christ desires that all souls come to Him. Rest assured that He will give us as many breaks as we need. True, one cannot live a life of willful sin and simply expect Jesus to say “don’t worry about…” We have to make the attempt on our own part and as long as we truly and sincerely try our best, even though we will fail at times, we can trust in the love and mercy of Jesus. The sacraments are there for our sake. Makes use of them but don’t beat yourself up if you find that you’ve missed the target. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and try, try again. And always trust in Jesus.

 

[JimR-OCDS]

Lust and sexual desire are not the same.

Males are easily stimulated through vision, so seeing an attractive woman and feeling a sexual desire are not necessarily lust.

Lust, would drive the man to want the woman if he could and would he would even welcome ideas in his consciousness in scheming ways to make it happen.

Its like when David, saw Uriah’s wife Bathsheba and desired her so much, he plotted against Uriah so he would be killed and David could then have Bathsheba. This is lust.

A teaching I heard from a Buddhist concerning lust, makes much sense.

"Lust will drive you to possess and once you possess the object of desire, you’ll commit other evils to keep it, even murder. "

Sexual desire can turn to lust, if you don’t keep it in check. But don’t anguish over having sexual desire, which is part of nature.

Jim

 

[nqes7t9]

just keep plugging away. things will work out. don’t bother going crazy, it’s just a waste of time. you can live a holy life. a truly holy life. but maybe you won’t make it. so just don’t sweat it too much. God bless you. Peace.

 

[PelagiathePenit]

Yes. Because it is not really inherently sinful. It is an out of order sin,

No no no… First off passing uncontrolled lust is by nature venial. Lust in the way that “thought” is mortal is to realize what you are thinking, realize its sinfulness, and then decide to indulge it further.

And I think you may be taking the “separated from God” a bit too far.

Lust is more so a factor when disordered. But regardless, You are talking about someone unsure of what they are involved in, again, by nature not mortal sin.

Everyone can just calm down! lol. Soo many people see religion as the “everything is a sin and we are all going to hell and we all suck”

NO, everyone stop that and just relax

Focus on the small and slowly learn yourself and the situation. Focus on loving God and let that be prime. You can start of with lust in its simplest form:

Don’t be getting all up on a dude
And don’t spend hours mentally imagining every detail of getting all up on a dude

then discuss your learning concerns with a priest

Then go forth and glorify God

You are funny. If I get married, I am going to be all up on my husband.

 

[PelagiathePenit]

Lust and sexual desire are not the same.

Males are easily stimulated through vision, so seeing an attractive woman and feeling a sexual desire are not necessarily lust.

Lust, would drive the man to want the woman if he could and would he would even welcome ideas in his consciousness in scheming ways to make it happen.

Its like when David, saw Uriah’s wife Bathsheba and desired her so much, he plotted against Uriah so he would be killed and David could then have Bathsheba. This is lust.

A teaching I heard from a Buddhist concerning lust, makes much sense.

"Lust will drive you to possess and once you possess the object of desire, you’ll commit other evils to keep it, even murder. "

Sexual desire can turn to lust, if you don’t keep it in check. But don’t anguish over having sexual desire, which is part of nature.

Jim

Women are stimulated by what they hear, so they say. Those romance novels - reading them- can be stimulating.

 

[JimR-OCDS]

Women are stimulated by what they hear, so they say. Those romance novels - reading them- can be stimulating.

But all a male has to do is see a female, period.

She could be wearing a burlap bag, but he still can be attracted sexually to her.

Jim

 

[PelagiathePenit]

But all a male has to do is see a female, period.

She could be wearing a burlap bag, but he still can be attracted sexually to her.

Jim

Men are very different than women. What makes a man attracted to a woman then? All those years of wearing short shorts, revealing my midriff and cleavage, and those tight fitting clothes were for nothing. No!!!

 

[JimR-OCDS]

Men are very different than women. What makes a man attracted to a woman then? All those years of wearing short shorts, revealing my midriff and cleavage, and those tight fitting clothes were for nothing. No!!!

The first attraction is visual. Its the way God wired us.

It doesn’t matter what you wore, except that you were competing against other women for men’s attention, and you wore what you thought would attract male attention, and it most likely worked.

However, in a world of women wearing burlap bags, men would still first be attracted to physical beauty of a woman, according to his tastes.

After that, its love, intimacy and honesty. A woman who is truly feminine,will make a man feel masculine and the man will make her feminine qualities as endearing.

Maybe I’m speaking for myself, but all the men I know, first view a woman by her looks.

Those who say they don’t are generally lying to, attract the attention of women as being a sensitive man.

Jim

 

[PelagiathePenit]

The first attraction is visual. Its the way God wired us.

It doesn’t matter what you wore, but you wore what you thought would attract male attention, and it most likely worked.

However, in a world of women wearing burlap bags, men would still first be attracted to physical beauty of a woman, according to his tastes.

After that, its love, intimacy and honesty.

Maybe I’m speaking for myself, but all the men I know, first view a woman by her looks.

Those who say they don’t are generally lying to, attract the attention of women as being a sensitive man.

Jim

lol. Those fake sensitive guys

 

[mikekle]

Lust is one of my vices too, and with my job, I see ALOT of people every day, coming and going, from all walks of life, I see many attractive women coming in, some in very tight or scanty clothing, its very tough to resist looking, but I also think the fact that we just ‘look’ and thats where it ends, should be considered as well, so while its true, I may see a shapely woman in tight clothes, and think about whats underneath for a few seconds, but I DO NOT pursue it or even think on it for very long…I think this alone shows that lust CAN be kept under control (to an extent).

Now, if everytime I saw one of these women come in and I was following them around, taking pictures, or trying to approach them, THAT would be much different, that would be acting on lust, and taking steps that may lead to sex.

I just think there is a HUGE difference between lusting (looking for a second) and taking some kind of action to further the lust.

 

[JimR-OCDS]

Lust is one of my vices too, and with my job, I see ALOT of people every day, coming and going, from all walks of life, I see many attractive women coming in, some in very tight or scanty clothing, its very tough to resist looking, but I also think the fact that we just ‘look’ and thats where it ends, should be considered as well, so while its true, I may see a shapely woman in tight clothes, and think about whats underneath for a few seconds, but I DO NOT pursue it or even think on it for very long…I think this alone shows that lust CAN be kept under control (to an extent).

Now, if everytime I saw one of these women come in and I was following them around, taking pictures, or trying to approach them, THAT would be much different, that would be acting on lust, and taking steps that may lead to sex.

I just think there is a HUGE difference between lusting (looking for a second) and taking some kind of action to further the lust.

A priest friend of mine told me that when he was a seminarian, his teacher told him you get to look for 30 seconds. Beyond that, you’ll start to wander into dangerous territory.

Try it sometime. 30 seconds is just appreciating the eye candy, then move on.

Jim

 

[Lea101]

A priest friend of mine told me that when he was a seminarian, his teacher told him you get to look for 30 seconds. Beyond that, you’ll start to wander into dangerous territory.

Try it sometime. 30 seconds is just appreciating the eye candy, then move on.

Jim

30 seconds honestly seems too long, and I know women who wouldn’t like guys to “appreciate” them as eye candy

 

[JimR-OCDS]

30 seconds honestly seems too long, and I know women who wouldn’t like guys to “appreciate” them as eye candy

Well, most young women enjoy being appreciated as eye candy which is why they go through great lengths to be attractive to the opposite sex.

And btw, 30 sec is a guideline not a hard fast rule.

But then, you’re probably taking this entire thing too seriously.

Jim

 

[Lea101]

Well, most young women enjoy being appreciated as eye candy which is why they go through great lengths to be attractive to the opposite sex.

And btw, 30 sec is a guideline not a hard fast rule.

But then, you’re probably taking this entire thing too seriously.

Jim

I wouldn’t say most. A lot of girls like immodest clothing because it’s cute and they are also the same girls who get uncomfortable at men catcalling them or checking them out

I used to like wearing tight short skirts because I look older (babyface syndrome), taller and slimmer (and hence more confident) but then alas, it was deemed as immodest so I stopped

I’m not trying to nitpick everything, just that a lot of guys think we are doing everything for them

 

[JimR-OCDS]

Lea101;

I wouldn’t say most. A lot of girls like immodest clothing because it’s cute and they are also the same girls who get uncomfortable at men catcalling them or checking them out

It depends on who the men are. Females have double standards when it comes to who they like or dislike looking at them.

Years ago when I worked, there was a co-worker who was considered a hunk by females. At the lunch table in the cafeteria, he could say the most sexist things and get giggles from the females. One short chubby Jewish guy made an innocent statement and the same females jumped all over him to the point one was threatening to go to HR to report him.

I’m not trying to nitpick everything, just that a lot of guys think we are doing everything for them :

Most young girls do in fact dress to draw attention from males. Its part of the mating rituals humans go through, consciously and unconsciously.

But no two ways about it, most men are first drawn to a female visually. Other more important attributes come later if a relationship comes about.

I hear men talk and how they talk about females, so no one will convince me otherwise.

Jim