Sinful thoughts and confession

[Christ_Conquers]

Hi Everyone,
Lately I’ve been having a lot sinful thoughts and i seem to keep giving in to them over and over again, I’ve been to confession four times in the last 13 days but i seem to keep falling. I’m also scrupulous so that makes everything confusing. I haven’t freely entertained the thoughts, but i seem to be deliberately thinking them for around a second. I’m wondering if i’m just being scrupulous about the whole thing. I just went to confession two days ago, but i feel like i should go again today, but i’m thinking maybe i should just talk to a priest about the whole thing first.

Any info/advice on this appreciated,
Thanks!

 

[Bookcat]

1. Important for a person struggling with with scruples to have a “regular confessor” to guide them --knowing their difficulties.

(from previous posts of mine)

Regarding unwanted thoughts

While Jesus makes it clear that one can sin in ones thoughts…just cause some lustful thought or other like thought happens does not mean that one has sinned…

What should we do with* unwanted* sexual thoughts or other “bad thoughts”…thoughts against God etc? Those pesky temptations that can come …even though we are not seeking them or doing anything to bring them etc…

Are they mortal sins?

For a mortal sin one needs a grave matter …full knowledge AND deliberate consent!!!

A. If you do not want the thought…it the thought displeases you: it can be a sign actually that you did not give any consent or do not give full consent.

B. Even if you felt a temptation for the thought – and were drawn to it involuntarily —but rejected it and maybe even turned right to God : again a sign not full consent (if there was any).

C. But what if one has a tempting thought --say of a sexual nature and even hesitated for a moment…but then rejected it for one did not want to sin?: it can be partial consent perhaps (and thus a venial sin)-- or it may be no sin at all but rather a strong temptation that drew you but then you saw what was happening and turned away.

D. A temptation can even be very strong or the thoughts very often – but this does NOT mean one has consented!

Remember --for it to be mortal there must be that deliberate consent!

What to do? on the spiritual side–relax first of all and remember the above.

Next – know that the more one fears the thoughts the more likely they are to come… or said another way --the more a person stress about seeking to avoid the thoughts the more likely he will have a problem with them.

for example: for the next 10 seconds try NOT to think of an apple.

tick tock …

tick tock…

Ok what did you think of?

Most likely an apple.

So it is best to ignore them and just not consent and then turn your attention to some other good thing…for instance whatever you are doing.

Simply do not consent and move on…

Another point – thoughts can just happen --they are the stuff with which we think…it is up to us to consent and take them further or not. And just because they are REAL VIVID and almost “think themselves” does not mean per se that one has given ANY consent.

They can be annoying…but need cause no actual harm …

(Now difficulties with thoughts can happen to anyone…and has for centuries…nothing new!..but I will note too that “some” have a condition known as OCD (I knew someone with this once…it was a painful experience)…and thus should seek further professional help to work at overcoming it and to live a more peaceful life…)

(also some suffer from scrupulosity and ought to have a* regular confessor*)

---

There is a story from the desert of the early Centuries of the Church where a younger hermit when to an older one with the problems of thoughts happening to him all the time…the older hermit told him to go outside open his cloak and catch the wind.

The younger hermit said such is not possible…

the older hermit replied --neither is it possible to stop all the thoughts that can come to you…your choice… is to consent or not…

 

[Richca]

Hi Everyone,
Lately I’ve been having a lot sinful thoughts and i seem to keep giving in to them over and over again, I’ve been to confession four times in the last 13 days but i seem to keep falling. I’m also scrupulous so that makes everything confusing. I haven’t freely entertained the thoughts, but i seem to be deliberately thinking them for around a second. I’m wondering if i’m just being scrupulous about the whole thing. I just went to confession two days ago, but i feel like i should go again today, but i’m thinking maybe i should just talk to a priest about the whole thing first.

Any info/advice on this appreciated,
Thanks!

Hello Christ Conquers,
Just having sinful thoughts, as I think you know, is not a sin. They become a sin when we entertain and take pleasure in them though I think it would have to be longer than a second. This battle of fighting against our evil inclinations and desires will last all our life on earth. It is a constant struggle and we are going to fall from time to time, for we are sinners. “For a just mall shall fall seven times and shall rise again” (Proverbs 24:16), and this even daily. God allows this so that we might grow in humility and acknowledge our complete dependence on him and his grace. After a fall, we need to pick ourselves back up, ask God for forgiveness and the help of his grace and move on. I think one can become overly scrupulous about the matter though I’m not saying you are. We do always need to keep up the struggle. I, for my part, acknowledge that I’m a sinner and I will remain one throughout this life on earth but I trust in the mercy of God. I try to keep up the struggle of fighting against my evil desires and inclinations and when I fall, I pick myself back up again. I would definitely recommend that you talk to your confessor or priest about it as that is usually consoling for us.

 

[Scoobyshme]

This may help…

A thought, in and of itself, is not sinful. It may be a temptation, yes. But it becomes a sin when we consent to the thought.

Example: A young man is sitting on the beach watching the waves go by. A beautiful young woman in a string bikini walks by and he has a tempting thought.

A. He thinks, “Nope! That’s a sin. I reject that idea!” And he prays a Hail Mary, asking Mary, the Queen of Saints to send some angels to help him out.

B. He thinks, “Boy, yeah! If I had HALF a chance, I would…”

In case A., he did not sin, and may grow in virtue.

In case Be, he needs to go to Sacramental Confession.

 

[Boulder257]

Reminds me of a quote I heard one time where the speaker said, “we can’t help it if a bird lands on our head, but we certainly can stop it from building a nest there.” The implication is fairly clear that sometimes thoughts pop into our head. Upon recognizing they are wrong they provide us with a wonderful opportunity to say a quick prayer and turn away from the thought.