Singles stop getting worked up over Valentine's Day

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VeritasLuxMea said:
What’s with all the hate for romantic love? :confused:
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We don’t hate romantic love any more than Charlie Brown hated Christmas! We simply think that what Valentine’s Day has become doesn’t have a lot to do with “what romantic love is all about.”

There is nothing wrong with liking hearts, chocolates and red flowers, any more than there is something wrong with liking to hear Bing Crosby sing “White Christmas”. Still, I would hope that neither Christmas nor St. Valentine’s Day nor any other celebration become a reason for sadness in those who have no one to celebrate them with. There is so much in life to be joyful about! If we only look, is it likely that there is really no one out there with whom to enjoy some balloons and chocolates?

If observing these special days in some archtypical way can’t be included in one’s own collection of joys, that ought not be a reason to become downcast. Life is far too short to mourn every time you realize that there is a birthday party going on without you!
 
Haha–guess I get kind of “ditzy” sometimes and forget what day is what! Sometimes I forget from one minute to the next! I’ll probably forget again before the night is over!
 
EasterJoy said:
Still, I would hope that neither Christmas nor St. Valentine’s Day nor any other celebration become a reason for sadness in those who have no one to celebrate them with. There is so much in life to be joyful about! If we only look, is it likely that there is really no one out there with whom to enjoy some balloons and chocolates?

If observing these special days in some archtypical way can’t be included in one’s own collection of joys, that ought not be a reason to become downcast. Life is far too short to mourn every time you realize that there is a birthday party going on without you!
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In small defense of those feeling sad, the difference between Valentine’s and other holidays like Christmas is that, even in the Middle Ages, Valentine’s day has had a rather high emphasis on human relationships (especially those of the marital and romantic variety).

You can celebrate Christmas and Halloween by yourself. Try to do it on Valentine’s day though and you won’t be the only one who’ll see you as sad. T_T
 
Since starting RCIA, I feel like I have a better handle on my emotions surrounding being single during the holidays. I’ve never gotten really worked-up about V-day because I see it for the huge commercial trap that it is 😃

No, but seriously, I don’t feel bad and I’m grateful. I know others are feeling sad and I’ve been there but not this year praise the Lord.
 
Luvz2travel said:
I keep seeing all these woe is me comments on the internet from singles asking how they are expected to make it through the day on Tuesday without a significant other in their life. I’m like get real. It’s a holiday marketed to death by the card companies, retail stores and flower shops for enough business to keep them in stock till the spring and summer shopping seasons. It’s a nice idea but it’s really become overblown. :eek:🤷:confused: What do you think??
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I totally agree with you. The entire “concept” of Valentine’s Day, in my opinion, has crossed the line into ridiculous.

We need to remember that “Valentine’s Day” was originally the feast day of a saint (St. Valentine). It isn’t about boxes of chocolate and giant teddy bears.
 
Lost_Wanderer said:
In small defense of those feeling sad, the difference between Valentine’s and other holidays like Christmas is that, even in the Middle Ages, Valentine’s day has had a rather high emphasis on human relationships (especially those of the marital and romantic variety).

You can celebrate Christmas and Halloween by yourself. Try to do it on Valentine’s day though and you won’t be the only one who’ll see you as sad. T_T
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Oh, goodness, I’m not trying to forbid sadness! That would be as silly as it would be arrogant! It can be very difficult to desire a romantic interest and not have one or to be separated from that someone you would normally spend Valentine’s Day with. I don’t know who can quarrel with that.

No, what I meant was to give people the permission to tell themselves, “I can enjoy the chocolates and the red decorations without feeling bad about not being in a romantic relationship right now. Not being in a relationship on February 14 is not a black mark against me as a person.” After all, when did feeling bad about not having found romance ever help someone find a good romance? It is optimism about, patience with, and perhaps a wry sense of humor concerning the randomness of the whole enterprise that keeps us ready for the possibility of a romantic relationship.

Love is a grand thing, but it comes in its own time and it usually comes with rough times as well as smooth. True love has its essence in day to day expressions of affection and fidelity, not in optional grandiose splurging that comes once a year. It is worth telling people not to let that truth get them down, even when February 14 rolls around. 👍
 
kib said:
Some of what has been stated in this thread is absolutely obnoxious.

Obviously this holiday has been turned into an excuse to spend money on garbage but there is certainly nothing bad about showing someone that they are important to you, even if the day has been commercialized.

Also, it is not wrong to feel lonely on Valentines day. Loneliness is very real and very painful. Emotional pain is the greatest we can experience. **Just because someone feels lonesome on Valentines day does not make the weak or foolishly sentimental- it shows that they are a normal human who longs for unity and communion. ** We long for connection with friends, loved ones, and many of us long for a very deep and sacramental union with one other person in marriage. Feeling the ache of single-hood shows that you desire that union and will hopefully be something of a catalyst for us to become the best version of ourselves in preparation for meeting our spouse. Romantic love is wonderful, anyone that says differently is a fool. It doesn’t fill our hearts, but it gives us a taste of a truly beautiful and wonderful gift from God. We will only be able to experience the fullness of that gift when/ if we spend eternity with our God in Heaven.

The difficult part is dealing with this ache and sadness when we see so many people receiving gifts and special attention on Valentines day. ** I think the best cure is to make yourself a gift to those who need it more than you.** I will be woefully alone tomorrow and feel sad about that right now. But love is self giving, if I stew in my lonely juices I can’t be a gift to anyone. **Tomorrow I will do my best to love others (and myself in a healthy way). I will also especially pray for the heart of my future wife (God willing) so that she won’t feel the ache of a lonely single person. I will pray for my ex girlfriend (who I care about so deeply) that her new boyfriend will help her feel loved in a special way. I will also consider the souls in this world who have NO ONE to make them feel loved- any day of the year.
**
I will be praying for all of you and do hope you will remember me also!
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Thank you for a beautiful post! 🙂 I really love what you’ve written here! 🙂

I’ve been in your situation and I understand. I will certainly pray for you, kib. I have no doubt that God has an amazing woman waiting for you, and I’ll pray that He’ll lead the two of you to each other soon! 🙂
 
Luvz2travel said:
I keep seeing all these woe is me comments on the internet from singles asking how they are expected to make it through the day on Tuesday without a significant other in their life. I’m like get real. It’s a holiday marketed to death by the card companies, retail stores and flower shops for enough business to keep them in stock till the spring and summer shopping seasons. It’s a nice idea but it’s really become overblown. :eek:🤷:confused: What do you think??
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Haha, I agree entirely. Who I truly respect are those couples who remember the commemoration of martyr Saint Valentine and go to daily Mass together.
 
EasterJoy said:
No, what I meant was to give people the permission to tell themselves, “I can enjoy the chocolates and the red decorations without feeling bad about not being in a romantic relationship right now. Not being in a relationship on February 14 is not a black mark against me as a person.”
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Well I suppose I could do well without people chiming in and making the most obvious statements about my lack of a love life (not even a crush, arrrgh). And on this day, of all dates…

Still, I’m with kib when I say that when the sad feelings arise from within, with little to no outside provocation, I think people should be a bit more sympathetic.
 
VeritasLuxMea said:
What’s with all the hate for romantic love? :confused:
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Don’t you know. Here on CAF sex is only for making babies and happiness is forbidden. Unless you’re a woman then you can be happy sometimes…especally if a man done do you wrong. (If you’re a man, then forget it, you sin and you deserve horrible retribution)
 
purplesunshine said:
Don’t you know. Here on CAF sex is only for making babies and happiness is forbidden. Unless you’re a woman then you can be happy sometimes…especally if a man done do you wrong. (If you’re a man, then forget it, you sin and you deserve horrible retribution)
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So it was wrong for my wife buy me a 30-30 Winchester for Valentine’s Day? :confused:
 
purplesunshine said:
To use on you? sure…ohhh wait as a gift? well to each their own.😛
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You’ll see the headlines if she uses it on me. What media outlet will be able to resist the headline “Wife uses Valentine’s gift to shoot Husband”? 😃
 
It is just one more made up fake money making commercial “holiday” used to part large amounts of money from consumers by capializing upon a secular consumer based society.

I heard last night on the evening news…the average money spent is about $160.00 per person here in the US…as a society we’ve chosen to “drink the kool-aid”.
 
Lost_Wanderer said:
Well I suppose I could do well without people chiming in and making the most obvious statements about my lack of a love life (not even a crush, arrrgh). And on this day, of all dates…

Still, I’m with kib when I say that when the sad feelings arise from within, with little to no outside provocation, I think people should be a bit more sympathetic.
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Do the busybodies ever take a holiday? :rolleyes:

I’ve always found it a difficult thing to decide how to deal with it when I’m feeling down. Generally speaking, I’ve come to the conclusion that it is fine to share that with others if I want help out of the hole, but it is better to keep it to myself (or share it with the like-feeling) if I just want to let the thing run its course on its own. I just do not have the energy for the people who will make it their business to argue with that decision. Since they are not going to be comfortable until my problem is “solved”, it is better to not include them in the process of living through it. Otherwise, they’ll all feel a need to have a finger in the pie, and the pie will not be the better for it.

When you find a friend who can listen when you are down and just let you be as you work through it, treasure that friend! That is a great gift, and a rare one! 👍
 
Married *lovebirds *here… 11+ years of wedded bliss… 4 kids…

How are ***WE ***spending Valentine’s Day (which happened to be our first date 14 years ago)?
  1. Checking on MIL in the hospital with gallstones… DH didn’t get much sleep last night over that one.
  2. Taking the oldest one to work with me today because he’s home sick from vomiting all night (YAWN… between him and the newborn nursing all night, I’m a little sleepy)…
  3. Picking up Chinese food for a family feast…
  4. Popping open a cheap bottle of wine…
  5. And the kicker… Doing dishes by hand because we’re waiting on the next paycheck to get a new dishwasher.
I DID make out with a nice little box of Godiva Chocolates. This was more of a requirement than an act of love, though.

Ahhhh… ROMANCE! 😃 ❤️
 
I just get my mind off of the fact that society wants all of us to be living happily together after with our soul-mates & instead focus on the unconditional love God has for all of us, no matter what day it is! Works for me. 👍
 
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