Six reasons NOT to send your daughter to college

[Kamaduck]

Oh no, if Christians went to college with the intention of going into academia and changing things around, either in the thought of academia or in simply becoming a real Christian Scientist, Doctor, Historian etc., one who didn’t keep his/her faith private but integrated it into his/her work, or if they went to make many friends and thus opportunities to open hearts and minds to God, then I think college would be great.

The renaissance in theistic and Christian philosophy since the 1970s in the English-speaking world has shown that Christians can change the universities around, and the existence of many people who came to the faith in their college years shows that edifying personal relationships which lead to evangelization can also happen.

However what seems to happen instead is that the Christians end up losing their faith, which I think is the most important thing in our lives and something which we should guard when going into the modern college, if we do go at all.

I do agree that the article is misguided because it shouldn’t only focus on women. Accusations of misogyny on his part may be warranted.

Of course we should guard our faith- but our faith ought to be strong enough to weather those four years. If we run away from anything that could concievably tempt us to sin, we will not be able to make a difference in the world.

 

[Cojuanco]

Sigh It may or may not be what the Catholic Church teaches … now.… however I did find a Catholic book… one from about 1940. It does say that a woman should stay home with her parents if not married.

I’m not really sure what the church would say now. I don’t think they ever put anything out there, except what you’d see on EWTN… and that is not really “The Church”.

Remember, folks, that a Nihil Obstat and Imprimatur in a book means that there is nothing contrary to faith or morals - not that the bishop agrees with each and every thing said in a book. In fact, there may be propositions which, while complete nonsense, are not impinging on faith or morals.

Not to mention that if that the contrary was definitively taught by the Church, as opposed to merely some Catholics, well, they wouldn’t have been running universities for women, now, would they?

 

[Cojuanco]

Oh I’m not laughing at the language skills I’m laughing at the idea that everything I needed to learn after age 17 I should have been able to to just look up myself in the library. I’m just a girl, so…the library system is plenty! All I have needed to know how to do is laundry and diapers.

Also, there is the fact that most Nice Catholic Boys are looking for someone they can talk about the Faith to, beyond an adolescent perspective. And even if they stay at home and homeschool their children, what if she has sons? How is she supposed to teach them the hard sciences, or history, if she does not know it herself? Would they not create a generation of ignorant men and women, such that they become prey for those seeking to tempt them away from the Faith? Or are these men eschewing the long-term?

 

[AnneElizabeth]

Remember, folks, that a Nihil Obstat and Imprimatur in a book means that there is nothing contrary to faith or morals - not that the bishop agrees with each and every thing said in a book. In fact, there may be propositions which, while complete nonsense, are not impinging on faith or morals.

Not to mention that if that the contrary was definitively taught by the Church, as opposed to merely some Catholics, well, they wouldn’t have been running universities for women, now, would they?

Interesting that you should say that then… because I’m quite sure this is how the author of the article in question probably gets his ideas from.

You have to admit though, before this era, what was mentioned in that book was ‘the norm’ for their era.

You also have to admit that the mess we see today is caused by all the new allowances and freedoms and social customs started this past century. No one knows what to expect from anyone… no roles expected to fulfill… it leaves a lot of gaps and troubles.

I for one grew up wanting to be like my mom a stay at home mother. As I was schooled it became increasing obvious that that was no longer the ‘way to be’… nor was it acceptable socially for me to be a SAHM. With no expectation of roles, everyone is left to fend for themselves… including the children it seems.

 

[TK421]

The occasions of sin are always present but the absolute last thing we need is for orthodox people to flee from academia.

The arguments that refer to women as mothers are somewhat more convincing, since it is the nurturing gender that bears a child for a 9 month period, but it’s not a blank check for daughters not to go to college, however I do think it’s flipped flopped how you currently have a larger ratio of women attending universities than men. In my anecdotal experience in life women are strongly geared towards overloading themselves with work, so they are vulnerable to going to university simply because they feel like they should, only to find it might have been a complete waste of time down the road if they end up being a full-time mom.

It’s difficult because of how certain secular elite keep pushing for women to be men though. You still have constant rallying cries of unequal income among the genders in spite of the obvious reason that women choose lower-paying careers. The idea of a woman being paid less than a man in the same position has been dead for decades, but they keep riding the zombie horse anyway.

And let’s face it, 4 years of college doesn’t turn a person into a scholar. It’s more geared towards prepping you for a specific career. If they’re worried about women turning dumb, all you need is an interest in reading and you’ll be fine. It’s how the majority of educated people became educated throughout the centuries, and it still is.

I think the article would have been more successful if it simply put some precautionary reasons for why a woman might not want to instantly jump into a 4-year program, instead of:

DO NOT SEND YOUR DAUGHTERS TO COLLEGE
(Please Note: This uploaded content is no longer available.)

But then again maybe they just have a more radical opinion than I do. They think the near occasion to sin is a valid reason not to go to college, and I don’t.

 

[Cojuanco]

Interesting that you should say that then… because I’m quite sure this is how the author of the article in question probably gets his ideas from.

You have to admit though, before this era, what was mentioned in that book was ‘the norm’ for their era.

You also have to admit that the mess we see today is caused by all the new allowances and freedoms and social customs started this past century. No one knows what to expect from anyone… no roles expected to fulfill… it leaves a lot of gaps and troubles.

I for one grew up wanting to be like my mom a stay at home mother. As I was schooled it became increasing obvious that that was no longer the ‘way to be’… nor was it acceptable socially for me to be a SAHM. With no expectation of roles, everyone is left to fend for themselves… including the children it seems.

True, but then again, until relatively late in the last century, most people didn’t even finish high school, men or women. Even today, unless you’re under 30, the chances are that, regardless of sex, you did not finish college.

Nevertheless, the fact is that if one had the ability and opportunity, the Church would have been willing to educate you regardless of sex. For example, reading some of the tracts published by Daniel Lord, S.J. in the 20s, 30s and 40s, it’s assumed that a Catholic woman in the United States going to college, while not common (most people generally not aspiring to college before WWII), was not a thing to be condemned, either. And it’s not as if Fr. Lord was some sort of wooly heterodox priest, either.

 

[Robyn_p]

I do agree that the article is misguided because it shouldn’t only focus on women. Accusations of misogyny on his part may be warranted.

:yup: And that’s the reason those of us who take issue with the article are offended. If he had titled it “6 reasons not to send your CHILD to college.” instead of talking about women as if they’re more prone to sin than men, I don’t think there would be as big an outrage as there is.

I don’t think anyone here denies that public universities are a dangerous place for young people of faith, that’s a no-brainer. If you send your son or daughter to a secular college without any more of a foundation than basic CCD classes, you’re setting them up to be eaten alive! I wholeheartedly agree that college is not for everyone, and that parents should be careful where they send their kid to school. We do have to take special care of our faith, and not put it in needless harm. But all that is regardless of gender.

That said, there are some great organizations out there like FOCUS or the Newman Society which go onto public universities to evangelize college students and strengthen young adult Catholics in their faith. And they all report lots of conversions and reversions to the Faith whenever they come on the scene. So I would there is some hope. Christ’s light can shine even in the darkest place.

 

[EasterJoy]

That’s funny because the college debt bubble and the increasing worthlessness of a college degree really puts to rest this “YOU MUST GO TO COLLEGE OR YOU’RE OUT OF LUCK AND YOU’RE A FAILURE!!!11!!” myth.

Also I hope you don’t think I’m being insincere by asking those questions. Going to college should be a well thought out decision, not just something you do after High School because that’s what everybody else is doing. The questions I asked, and the questions you asked, are important to this process of deciding on whether going to college is the right decision. I just wish that people would think about the risks that colleges pose to your finances and your moral health.

This is 100% true…that is, that college is not for everyone and especially that not everyone who would eventually benefit from college is likely to get the most out of it by jumping right in after high school, ready or not. Many people would be far better off if they stayed home, got a job, and saved money with both hands until they knew that they were self-motivated to give their best to post-secondary training or education. Some 18 year oldsjust have too much of the sap of independence going to listen to that and some parents are too ambitious for their children to accept that, but if children had to prove to they were ready instead of being pressured into a liberal-arts box by their folks, it would save a lot of money and angst.

 

[EasterJoy]

Oh no, if Christians went to college with the intention of going into academia and changing things around, either in the thought of academia or in simply becoming a real Christian Scientist, Doctor, Historian etc., one who didn’t keep his/her faith private but integrated it into his/her work, or if they went to make many friends and thus opportunities to open hearts and minds to God, then I think college would be great.

The renaissance in theistic and Christian philosophy since the 1970s in the English-speaking world has shown that Christians can change the universities around, and the existence of many people who came to the faith in their college years shows that edifying personal relationships which lead to evangelization can also happen.

However what seems to happen instead is that the Christians end up losing their faith, which I think is the most important thing in our lives and something which we should guard when going into the modern college, if we do go at all.

I do agree that the article is misguided because it shouldn’t only focus on women. Accusations of misogyny on his part may be warranted.

O
It’s pretty hard to get Catholics on the Supreme Court, if none of us go to college!

Seriously, though, I did not find the jobs I had before college were more free of temptation than college; just different temptations.

 

[AuditVocemMeam]

Seriously, though, I did not find the jobs I had before college were more free of temptation than college; just different temptations.

That’s understandable. It’s just that there is so much about the college system I don’t understand. Grouping together a bunch of kids slightly above and slightly below the drinking age…having men and women living in such close proximity…what could possibly go wrong?

 

[JustPink]

That’s understandable. It’s just that there is so much about the college system I don’t understand. Grouping together a bunch of kids slightly above and slightly below the drinking age…having men and women living in such close proximity…what could possibly go wrong?

Just curious, do you plan on going to college?

 

[AuditVocemMeam]

Just curious, do you plan on going to college?

I’m in college

 

[JustPink]

I’m in college

At 17? Are you in the dorms?

 

[EasterJoy]

That’s understandable. It’s just that there is so much about the college system I don’t understand. Grouping together a bunch of kids slightly above and slightly below the drinking age…having men and women living in such close proximity…what could possibly go wrong?

It is cheaper than having male-only or female-only dorms to have co-ed dorms (more flexible) and having “resident assistants” from among the students to “supervise” instead of live-in house mothers. The problem is that RAs are more lax than the widowed ladies that used to keep watch on the henhouse. There were no drugs or alcohol “allowed” in the dorms, but there was zero enforcement.

I could not get out of the dorms fast enough. If I had it to do over, I’d live in the “quiet” dorm that had 24-hr “quiet hours”. The alcohol abusers never wanted to congrgate there.

 

[fpt]

Their manners of thinking is totally far away of catholicism. By their comments, they are totally out of the catholic doctrine and out of the catholic practice. Their motivations, their reasonings, their reasons, their principles… are not in link with the catholicity.

They** are nostalgic persons of some past times via the using of ideologies and heresies coming from past.**

The interpretation of the near occasion of sins: jansenism, neo-jansenism, catharism, puritanism, neo-puritanism, victorianism, neo-victorianism, pharisaism, externalism, judgmentalism, scrupulism, the pessimism, the negativism, the sinful presumptionism

The ontological inferiority of the woman via a deep discrimination, in the noble sense of word, the catholic chariarization of nature of woman:** sexism from man, the masculinism, misogyny and Eve, the female who was the first sinner before Adam (a simplistic view concerning the Original sin), the control of husband on the wife, the control of father on her daughters, the simplistic interpretation of the notion of submission of wife in the marriage, the women should be legal minors,…etc;**

The theoretical providentialism of the procreation, the quiverfullism of the procreation (the absolute procreationism, the absolute physiologism of procreation), the primary anti-personalism of the procreation seems to be their principles concerning the conjugal life and family life.

…etc.

Of good faith or of bad faith, consciously or unconsciously, whatever.

Of good faith or of bad faith, consciously or unconsciously, *they are on the dangerous way, they are on a wrong approach, intellectually speaking. That is not very moral.
*
Their propaganda is awful, their advice are not wise, are not relevant, in my humble opinion. They are, only, in a strong reactionism, it is so sad. They live in an isolation bubble;

 

[RayonGama]

:yup: And that’s the reason those of us who take issue with the article are offended. If he had titled it “6 reasons not to send your CHILD to college.” instead of talking about women as if they’re more prone to sin than men, I don’t think there would be as big an outrage as there is.

I don’t think anyone here denies that public universities are a dangerous place for young people of faith, that’s a no-brainer. If you send your son or daughter to a secular college without any more of a foundation than basic CCD classes, you’re setting them up to be eaten alive! I wholeheartedly agree that college is not for everyone, and that parents should be careful where they send their kid to school. We do have to take special care of our faith, and not put it in needless harm. But all that is regardless of gender.

That said, there are some great organizations out there like FOCUS or the Newman Society which go onto public universities to evangelize college students and strengthen young adult Catholics in their faith. And they all report lots of conversions and reversions to the Faith whenever they come on the scene. So I would there is some hope. Christ’s light can shine even in the darkest place.

College is not for everyone, but the gouv tell you you should go since you are that high. Right.
That is where the problem is. but most believe they have to go, because they are brain washed.

 

[marymary1975]

:yup: And that’s the reason those of us who take issue with the article are offended. If he had titled it “6 reasons not to send your CHILD to college.” instead of talking about women as if they’re more prone to sin than men, I don’t think there would be as big an outrage as there is.

I don’t think anyone here denies that public universities are a dangerous place for young people of faith, that’s a no-brainer. If you send your son or daughter to a secular college without any more of a foundation than basic CCD classes, you’re setting them up to be eaten alive! I wholeheartedly agree that college is not for everyone, and that parents should be careful where they send their kid to school. We do have to take special care of our faith, and not put it in needless harm. But all that is regardless of gender.

That said, there are some great organizations out there like FOCUS or the Newman Society which go onto public universities to evangelize college students and strengthen young adult Catholics in their faith. And they all report lots of conversions and reversions to the Faith whenever they come on the scene. So I would there is some hope. Christ’s light can shine even in the darkest place.

This is absolutely true, mainly the second paragraph. The issue many fail to see is that all the problems in College are a reflection of a larger problem: parents not properly educating life at home. I know many people in College who never got involved in partying, fraternities, drinking, etc. In fact I know a few who lived at home while attending College bit all these people had parents who were able to guide them and educate them the right way so they didn’t need to be kept hidden in a tower because their parents taught them properly. But if you have a kid whose father is the typical man who doesn’t pull his weight in the family, the mother doesn’t care or ir too stress or has too many problems to focus her attention on the kids, a kid where his parents at home drink excessively, are promiscuous, live a sinful life, etc… what are you going to expect from that kid in college.

 

[JustPink]

It is cheaper than having male-only or female-only dorms to have co-ed dorms (more flexible) and having “resident assistants” from among the students to “supervise” instead of live-in house mothers. The problem is that RAs are more lax than the widowed ladies that used to keep watch on the henhouse. There were no drugs or alcohol “allowed” in the dorms, but there was zero enforcement.

I could not get out of the dorms fast enough. If I had it to do over, I’d live in the “quiet” dorm that had 24-hr “quiet hours”. The alcohol abusers never wanted to congrgate there.

0 enforcement for drugs/alcohol in dorms? Maybe they weren’t before, but they definitely are now. At least from what I’ve seen.

My brother and my significant other both got burned because of alcohol in dorms, and they went to different colleges. My brother was caught having a beer in a dorm once with his friends and almost got kicked out of school for it. He had to write an essay and do volunteer work and everything. My SO was at a dorm party where people were drinking, and even though he didn’t drink anything he still got in trouble when the RA walked in and had to face consequences because he was in there while others were drinking.

 

[marymary1975]

0 enforcement for drugs/alcohol in dorms? Maybe they weren’t before, but they definitely are now. At least from what I’ve seen.

My brother and my significant other both got burned because of alcohol in dorms, and they went to different colleges. My brother was caught having a beer in a dorm once with his friends and almost got kicked out of school for it. He had to write an essay and do volunteer work and everything. My SO was at a dorm party where people were drinking, and even though he didn’t drink anything he still got in trouble when the RA walked in and had to face consequences because he was in there while others were drinking.

Yes this is true last year the son of a co-worker of mine got criminal charges for having one empty can of beer in the dorm. In NH now is not only forbidden but a.criminal offense too.

 

[fpt]

In my side, I think that the issues of this article are directly linked to the manner of understanding the catholic teaching, of practicing it, and also of the manner of seeing the real world and of living within it, as catholic lay person.

After reading this blog, i can state that their speech is stricter than the official catholic doctrine, is more rigourous than the natural and normal standards, that are taught by Roman Catholic Church,** is more reactionary than the reaction of the church in front of modern heresies,** is full of simple reasonings (no deep respect of** link between faith and reason)**, is too much nostalgic, is very old fashion in the wrong way (the wrong culturalism from the past), is full of male sexism…etc. They seem to be too much exalted and they are very providentialist and co.

Are they monks? Are they nuns? Are they priests? Are they friars?