So i went to confession

  • Thread starter Thread starter Niji
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
N

Niji

Guest
and i got to say it was a nerve racking experience. This was my second time going, since I was 11 or something about 10 years ago. All I wanted to do was confess the mortal sins that Ive been bottling up for years. I didnt say any of the lesser sins even though I most likely had many but god forgives you of those if you just ask him to right? No priest required?
Anyways the priest wasnt very enthusiatic or helpful. He looked bored, tired and uninterested which made it even harder for me. Ive read about all these people going to confession and saying that the priest was great and helpful and easy to talk too. So I thought id have the same experience. I kind of was thinking if I felt that he was approachable id have a short conversation with him about my sins but I couldnt with the way he was at the time. Very Gloomy. I got nervous and started going through the process while having trouble finding the right words to say. I studderd and repeated somethings, was a really messy confession but I said what i needed to, I think, and he gave me the absolution so im forgiven right? I mean Ive had a REALLY hard time going to this thing and I finally went and it wasnt what I expected…I felt really bad the whole time I was in mortal sin, so bad that I worked up the courage to go and then I totally rush through the confession because of nerves and possibly forgetting sins I wanted to be forgiven of.

Should I, next time I go, redo my previous confession? because now the whole things foggy to me.

PS: I only confessed to 3 Mortal sins. Should I have confessed to more? I only confessed the ones that where at the forefront of my mind. The ones bothering me the most. I never really thought about what other mortal sins I might have committed. Am I still forgiven of all sins even though I didnt fully reflect on myself like I should have?

Thanks
 
A Confession is valid if…
  • you were repentant (intending not to sin in these or any ways again)
  • said all your mortal sins
  • didnt lie to the priest
  • the priest says absolution
I’m sorry to hear your confession was difficult for you. But consider the above and remember it’s God who forgives you in Confession, through the priest, you’re not just talking to the priest but he is there “in the person of Christ”.

God bless! 🙂
 
If you confessed ALL the mortal sins that you REMEMBERED at the time of your confession, you’re fine. If you remembered more after you left, but did not remember these during the confession, they are still forgiven. However, if you are ever iffy on a mortal sin, go ahead and confess it anyways.
 
During my times of recollection and examination of conscience, I make lists. It is perfectly acceptable to bring your list with you to confession. If you use the “box” bring a very ittie-bitty LED flashlight with you so you can read the list.
 
YoungTradCath said:
If you confessed ALL the mortal sins that you REMEMBERED at the time of your confession, you’re fine. If you remembered more after you left, but did not remember these during the confession, they are still forgiven. However, if you are ever iffy on a mortal sin, go ahead and confess it anyways.
Click to expand...
but I should have examined my conscience more than I did. I couldnt have possibly only committed 3 Mortals in those 10 long years. It feels like I was just being lazy. If I go again and reconfess sins I supposively have already been forgiven of, is that lieing:confused:
 
I started going to confession again about a year ago. And, at first it was a very difficult process for me as well. I remember sweating in prayer before confession the first couple times. Anyways, my advice would be to write your mortal sins on a sticky note or a note card so that you don’t forget anything you wanted to confess.

When you’re done just throw it away.

Also, I’ve learned that the attitude of the priest really doesn’t affect the confession. If you honestly confess your sins, are legitimately contrite about it, and the priest gives absolution than you’re forgiven. The priest I confess to doesn’t like to answer questions, he’ll always be very brief and try to point you back to confessing your sins.

Also, being contrite or sorry for your sins doesn’t mean you have to be emotionally sorrowful or sad. As long as you regret having done all your sins and resolve not to do them again. As long as you acknowledge that you were wrong and aren’t sitting there thinking “I’ll confess this, but I don’t think i was wrong”. If you do that with or without emotion you are still genuinely contrite.

And yeah, just remember that God wants to forgive you. You’ve came to His Church seeking forgiveness, He’s not looking for ways to say “you messed up a little bit, I’m not going to forgive you”.

Hope this helps.
May God’s grace be with you,
David
 
Hi

It is very good that you are seeking to make a good confession and begin to live again in the grace of God. To begin to live again the grace of your baptism.

I am sorry your experience with the Priest was less than desired…perhaps he had been up all night attending to dying persons etc…

(just like anyone Priests can have bad days…and well some may not be less than they ought to be via temperment etc…but do not let that discourage you. I have had some priests over the years who were well…less than they ought to have been…but so so many have been wonderful.)

What I would do is examine your conscience for ALL the mortal sins you have committed…then make an appointment with a priest who seems kind to you (so you do not take the chance of running across another in not the best state in a random confessional). And make the confession…including what you confessed before and that you did not confess the others at the time…and well your background as to why you did not do so (did not know?).

Tell him that in the last confession you did not try to confess all your mortal sins…(I assume here you did not know you had to do so since it has been so long?). For we are obliged to confess all our mortal sins in number and kind (and circumstances that change the sin …like it was your Father you murdered or the chalice from Church you stole).

If one does not know the number…one can approximate according to what you find in your examination…such that if you know it was round 2-3 times a month for the last 5 years you say so…if you know it was around 40-50 times well you say so…if all you can get at is many times or a lot…well that is all you can say.

The kind is the according to the species…that is for mortal sin one can not just say “a sin against the 6th commandment” or “a sexual sin” one needs to say what was done…such as adultery, masturbation, pornography, fornication etc.

So “I accuse my self of murder 2x, adultery 3x, and burning down 3 Churches” etc…

Venial sins can be confessed …when they are confessed …in more general terms.

We need to do a good examination of conscience. But even in so doing one can forget a mortal sin. If you* forget *a mortal sin but are intending to confess all your mortal sins and repenting of them (contrite and intend not to do them again)…they they can thus be forgiven and absolved indirectly. IF one later remembers them one is obliged to confess them in the next confession. (Hiding mortal sins make the confession invalid and add more sin which needs to be confessed…in your case …it may be that you were not trying to hide them but maybe did not know you were to confess all…tell the priest what happened and the fact that it had been so many years etc).

Jesus loves you and is pleased with your desire to come to him …he gives us “true life” …and confession is a way he restores that life to us!

Confession is a great gift (I my self am a convert so had to learn too…:))
 
Bookcat said:
Hi

It is very good that you are seeking to make a good confession and begin to live again in the grace of God. To begin to live again the grace of your baptism.

I am sorry your experience with the Priest was less than desired…perhaps he had been up all night attending to dying persons etc…

(just like anyone Priests can have bad days…and well some may not be less than they ought to be via temperment etc…but do not let that discourage you. I have had some priests over the years who were well…less than they ought to have been…but so so many have been wonderful.)

What I would do is examine your conscience for ALL the mortal sins you have committed…then make an appointment with a priest who seems kind to you (so you do not take the chance of running across another in not the best state in a random confessional). And make the confession…including what you confessed before and that you did not confess the others at the time…and well your background as to why you did not do so (did not know?).

Tell him that in the last confession you did not try to confess all your mortal sins…(I assume here you did not know you had to do so since it has been so long?). For we are obliged to confess all our mortal sins in number and kind (and circumstances that change the sin …like it was your Father you murdered or the chalice from Church you stole).

If one does not know the number…one can approximate according to what you find in your examination…such that if you know it was round 2-3 times a month for the last 5 years you say so…if you know it was around 40-50 times well you say so…if all you can get at is many times or a lot…well that is all you can say.

The kind is the according to the species…that is for mortal sin one can not just say “a sin against the 6th commandment” or “a sexual sin” one needs to say what was done…such as adultery, masturbation, pornography, fornication etc.

So “I accuse my self of murder 2x, adultery 3x, and burning down 3 Churches” etc…

Venial sins can be confessed …when they are confessed …in more general terms.

We need to do a good examination of conscience. But even in so doing one can forget a mortal sin. If you* forget *a mortal sin but are intending to confess all your mortal sins and repenting of them (contrite and intend not to do them again)…they they can thus be forgiven and absolved indirectly. IF one later remembers them one is obliged to confess them in the next confession. (Hiding mortal sins make the confession invalid and add more sin which needs to be confessed…in your case …it may be that you were not trying to hide them but maybe did not know you were to confess all…tell the priest what happened and the fact that it had been so many years etc).

Jesus loves you and is pleased with your desire to come to him …he gives us “true life” …and confession is a way he restores that life to us!

Confession is a great gift (I my self am a convert so had to learn too…:))
Click to expand...
O well I know Im suppose to confess all mortal sins, the ones that I can remember at least, but I only recently, maybe a year and a half ago fully grasped the concept of what mortal sin was and the conditions under it. I dont exactly know if that was the first time I realized it but my memory is bad so I couldnt possibly figure that out now.
Anyways like I said in my post, im worried that since I only confessed the mortal sins that have been bothering me all this time, I could potentially have more sins of that nature I should have and could have confessed to only if I had reflected and examined my self a bit harder.

but thanks all for your posts. Im not going to give up on confession. Ill return again.
 
Niji said:
O well I know Im suppose to confess all mortal sins, the ones that I can remember at least, but I only recently, maybe a year and a half ago fully grasped the concept of what mortal sin was and the conditions under it. I dont exactly know if that was the first time I realized it but my memory is bad so I couldnt possibly figure that out now.
Anyways like I said in my post, im worried that since I only confessed the mortal sins that have been bothering me all this time, I could potentially have more sins of that nature I should have and could have confessed to only if I had reflected and examined my self a bit harder.

but thanks all for your posts. Im not going to give up on confession. Ill return again.
Click to expand...
One can commit a mortal sin …even if one does not know the term…like for example…murder or adultery…we just know they are horrible things…

Anyhow…my advice is what I noted above.

And then live in the joy of the Lord 🙂
 
Niji said:
O well I know Im suppose to confess all mortal sins, the ones that I can remember at least, but I only recently, maybe a year and a half ago fully grasped the concept of what mortal sin was and the conditions under it. I dont exactly know if that was the first time I realized it but my memory is bad so I couldnt possibly figure that out now.
Anyways like I said in my post, im worried that since I only confessed the mortal sins that have been bothering me all this time, I could potentially have more sins of that nature I should have and could have confessed to only if I had reflected and examined my self a bit harder.

but thanks all for your posts. Im not going to give up on confession. Ill return again./QUOT

If nervousness affects your memory during Confession, why not do what I do: Log on to your computor and look up “Examination of conscience” on your search engine. Several excellent sites will show up that will help you do just that.
First, write down how long it has been since your last Confession. Then, while you are examining you conscience, write down all of your mortal and venial sins, as you remember them along with how many times you did them.
Take this list with you into the confessional. There is usually enough light coming through the grille from inside the priests compartment. If not, you can adjust the curtain in your part of the booth. If necessary, let the priest know that you wrote down your sins because of your short memory.
By doing this, you will find confessing to be much easier and you will feel much relief.
Make sure you destroy the piece of paper after confession.
Click to expand...
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top