So, we want to become Catholic... a longish story with books

[Lissla_Lissar]

My husband and I would like to become Catholic. I was brought up (and was a practising) Anglican, baptised and confirmed. He was baptised into my church just before our wedding. Over the last five years, we have gradually gone through the process of conversion to the Church.

It started with the ecumenical Christian college we (and our best friends) attended, when they had us study church history and handed us copies of G. K. Chesterton’s Orthodoxy. It continued through reading Father Elijah, by Michael O’Brien, and for the first time understanding the beauty of the doctrines of Perpetual Virginity and the Assumption.

We both read The Seven Storey Mountain and The Divine Comedy. We began, fumblingly, to pray to rosary, and to wrangle with the doctrines that we didn’t understand or agree with.

Our best friends were received into the Church. They told us to read Rome, Sweet Home. We did, and both of us started to read the Catechism (my husband read it back to front, I read largish chunks) and were astonished at the beauty and power of its writing- it reads like a love song to God, which I suppose it is.

We struggled, and fumbled, and talked, and prayed, and found we weren’t able to take RCIA one year because we missed the starting date, and another because of insane work hours. We stopped receiving Communion at Anglican churches. We read the rest of the Children of the Last Days series, and Swimming with Scapulars, and Brideshead Revisited.We began attending Mass pretty regularly.

Another friend entered the Church.

We have been told that we can only enter through RCIA, and at the Easter Vigil. The nearest RCIA course starts next Thursday, and I work Thursday evenings. We have a meeting next Wednesday with our pastor to fill out paperwork, but I am afraid that I will not be able to enter the programme, and frustrated because so far three of our friends have entered the Church without a formal RCIA-ing.

I have been told by different people, that RCIA is required/not required/necessary to formation/unecessary for mature Christians. I would like to enter the church. I would like to enter it with my husband, and I am afraid of losing another year. I want to be able to receive the Eucharist, and participate fully in Mass. Catholicism is a new culture, very different from the church I was raised in, and still kind of scary in aspects, but I know that’s where I ought to be.

I suppose I’m asking for prayers and advice- how necessary is RCIA for (relatively) mature Christians? If I am unable to attend, what should I do? My best friend thinks (half joking) that we should just present a reading list and ask for Reconciliation immediately. Sigh. Any help, advice, or comments would be appreciated.

 

[Orionthehunter]

My husband and I would like to become Catholic. I was brought up (and was a practising) Anglican, baptised and confirmed. He was baptised into my church just before our wedding. Over the last five years, we have gradually gone through the process of conversion to the Church.

It started with the ecumenical Christian college we (and our best friends) attended, when they had us study church history and handed us copies of G. K. Chesterton’s Orthodoxy. It continued through reading Father Elijah, by Michael O’Brien, and for the first time understanding the beauty of the doctrines of Perpetual Virginity and the Assumption.

We both read The Seven Storey Mountain and The Divine Comedy. We began, fumblingly, to pray to rosary, and to wrangle with the doctrines that we didn’t understand or agree with.

Our best friends were received into the Church. They told us to read Rome, Sweet Home. We did, and both of us started to read the Catechism (my husband read it back to front, I read largish chunks) and were astonished at the beauty and power of its writing- it reads like a love song to God, which I suppose it is.

We struggled, and fumbled, and talked, and prayed, and found we weren’t able to take RCIA one year because we missed the starting date, and another because of insane work hours. We stopped receiving Communion at Anglican churches. We read the rest of the Children of the Last Days series, and Swimming with Scapulars, and Brideshead Revisited.We began attending Mass pretty regularly.

Another friend entered the Church.

We have been told that we can only enter through RCIA, and at the Easter Vigil. The nearest RCIA course starts next Thursday, and I work Thursday evenings. We have a meeting next Wednesday with our pastor to fill out paperwork, but I am afraid that I will not be able to enter the programme, and frustrated because so far three of our friends have entered the Church without a formal RCIA-ing.

I have been told by different people, that RCIA is required/not required/necessary to formation/unecessary for mature Christians. I would like to enter the church. I would like to enter it with my husband, and I am afraid of losing another year. I want to be able to receive the Eucharist, and participate fully in Mass. Catholicism is a new culture, very different from the church I was raised in, and still kind of scary in aspects, but I know that’s where I ought to be.

I suppose I’m asking for prayers and advice- how necessary is RCIA for (relatively) mature Christians? If I am unable to attend, what should I do? My best friend thinks (half joking) that we should just present a reading list and ask for Reconciliation immediately. Sigh. Any help, advice, or comments would be appreciated.

First of all, you are doing the right thing to talk to the Pastor.

Second, one thing that you probably have discovered about the Church is its timeless approach to about everything. It makes sense as God transcends time and space. The focus is always around conversion- a constant conversion that takes place over a lifetime. In this context, the Church will see much of what you are experiencing as part of your own conversion story. Within this context, your desire to be Catholic makes you Catholic even though you are unable to recieve the sacraments.

Third, your Pastor may have a strong natural bias toward insisting that you go thru the formal process. He may have two very good reasons. One is that he has seen the fruits that come from the process (fruits to which you are unaware as you’ve never done it). Another is that he is probably over-worked and spread too thin with regard to funerals, weddings, visiting the homebound and sick as well as running his parish. This makes the RCIA process an efficient way for people to come into the Church.

Fourth, because of #3, he may be resistant to looking outside the box and may have little experience doing so. Do a little research on finding out a way to have individualized catechesis. Maybe there is a retired Priest who might be willing to do private, personal catechesis.

Fifth, even if you don’t get the answer you desire at this time from your Pastor, don’t despair. There are many people around you at this parish who are in this boat. They come to Mass every week but can’t recieve the Sacraments because of a irregular marriage (remarried w/o benefit of an annullment). They come to Mass, make a spiritual communion, and live a Catholic Life in all respects except recieve the sacraments. You may be required because of your circumstances to continue to fast from the Eucharist. I did it myself for five years until my wife finally got her annullment.

Sixth, maybe this conflict is the Holy Spirit asking you to examine your priorities and your need for this job that requires you to work evenings. Maybe, He wants you to find a different job for the benefit of your family and marriage and the RCIA is the impetus He is using.

In short, spend a lot of time in prayer between now and your meeting with the Pastor. Pray that you be guided to see God’s will in what the Pastor tells you and that the Pastor is guided by the Holy Spirit. Be grateful and generous in your response to what happens on Wednesday. God will not be outdone in gratitude and generousity. It is quite obvious your conversion is moving in the right direction. Trust that the Holy Spirit will let it all fall in place according to His schedule. God Bless you on your journey.

P.S. You made a comment about attending Mass most Sunday’s. The depth of your desire to be Catholic is evident to the extent you are willing to live a Catholic Life. The center of the Catholic Life is the Mass.

 

[Lissla_Lissar]

Thank you for your thoughtful reply. We are doing a lot of praying for discernment, patience, and obedience.

My husband does not make enough for us both to live on, so my job is necessary, and I am very happy doing it. I do not think that God is prompting me to go through the quitting/looking for work business in order to tale RCIA, partly because by the time I had managed to find another job it would be at least a few weeks past the start of class, and partly because neither of us feel spiritually prompted in that direction. We will talk about the impediments with our Pastor.

It is possible that my husband could go through RCIA and going to the Church without me, but this seems like a bad spiritual break in our relationship- we do not want the rifts that could be caused by only one of us being made fully a part of Church life. We are one flesh, and we don’t want to undergo such an important and beautiful thing separately.

Must run and do chores.
Blessings.

 

[John_Lilburne]

…We have been told that we can only enter through RCIA, and at the Easter Vigil. The nearest RCIA course starts next Thursday, and I work Thursday evenings. We have a meeting next Wednesday with our pastor to fill out paperwork, but I am afraid that I will not be able to enter the programme, and frustrated because so far three of our friends have entered the Church without a formal RCIA-ing.

I have been told by different people, that RCIA is required/not required/necessary to formation/unecessary for mature Christians. I would like to enter the church. …

You have already entered the church, through baptism as an Anglican. The Catholic Church does not repeat baptism.
The ceremony you want is “Reception of Baptized Christians Into the Full Communion of the Catholic Church”.

This is described in the liturgical book “Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults”:
“473. This is the liturgical rite by which a person born and baptized in a separated ecclesial Community is received, according to the Latin rite, into the full communion of the Catholic Church. The rite is so arranged that no greater burden than necessary (see Acts 15:28) is required for the establishment of communion and unity.” (The Rites Volume One, Liturgical Press, 1990, ISBN: 0-8146-6015-0, page 275.)

The preparation for this is described:
"477. The baptized Christian is to receive both doctrinal and spiritual preparation, adapted to individual pastoral requirements, for reception into the full communion of the Catholic Church. The candidate should learn to deepen an inner adherence to the Church, where he or she will find the fullness of his or her baptism. During the period of preparation the candidate may share in worship in conformity with the provisions of the Ecumenical Directory.
“Anything that would equate candidates for reception with those who are catechumens is to be absolutely avoided.”

So at the meeting with the priest:

• make the point that Thursday nights would be a burden.
• suggest another process of preparation (perhaps reading list, meetings with priest or catechist, ceremonies to attend)
• try to make sure that the priest understands that this Reception ceremony is part of the RCIA book, which he should be following.
• perhaps point out to the priest that you can write to the bishop if you are not satisfied with his process of preparation.

 

[Eileen_T]

Ask the Mother for her assistance…

Prayer to the Virgin Mary as Untier of Knots:

"Holy Mary, full of the presence of God during your life you accepted with great humility the Holy Will of the Father and the legacy of your Son Our Lord Jesus Christ. Evil never dared to entangle you with its confusion. Since then you have interceded for all of our difficulties. With all simplicity and patience you have given us example on how to untangle the knots in our complicated lives. By being our Mother forever, you arrange and make clear the path that unites us to Our Lord.

Holy Mary, Mother of God and ours, with your maternal heart untie the knots that upset our lives. We ask you to receive in your hands (mention who or prayer request) and deliver us from the chains and confusions that have us restrained.

Blessed Virgin Mary, through your grace, your intercession and by your example, deliver us from evil and untie the knots that keep us from uniting with God, so that once free of every confusion and error, we may find Him in all things, have Him in our hearts and serve him always in our brothers and sisters. Mother of Good Counsel pray for us . Amen