No, no problem there.
It’s pretty obvious that people who subscribe to “miracle belief” are no different than people who subscribe to “movie belief.” We do these things because they have restorative value. They alter our brain chemistry. These things can be rewarding, even if we know they aren’t real. It’s simply how our brains work. Why else would people pay to go see something they know isn’t real? It’s the only reasonable explanation. Any further discussion of the subject is probably moot.
Although my faith often brings me great peace and joy, normally it challenges in me in ways I would rather avoid. The same can be said for most faithful followers. Carrying a cross is generally not a pleasant thing.
I do not doubt that the alteration of brain chemistry is at play, but this does not necessarily have any bearing of the truth, whatever it may be. I will also grant you that some of the same physiological and psychological realities between the excitement of movies and the excitement of miracles hold truth. However, again, that does not necessarily have any bearing on the truth, either way.
For me, I have little or no desire to follow something I do not believe is true. I would rather chase money and get loaded on drugs, as in my former life. Most of the time it was a lot of fun. God willing, I now plan on entering a formation program to become a Roman Catholic priest, an idea that largely turns me off, but only appeals to me because I believe it’s where I am called. I am a lot like my parents in so many ways, and yet both of them are agnostic.
Jesus said to Pontius Pilate that all who seek the truth come to me. Pontius Pilate, said “what is truth” and walked away, not believing there was an answer. There are many people far more intelligent and educated that the both of us, who were skeptics and did not believe in miracles, and today are faithful believers in Christ.
Even ask Wiccans, Satanists, New Agers, and people in other religions. They believe in the power of the super-world. They also believe in miracles, even though they are not on our side. Its no mystery to them that the spirit-realm is the real deal.
If I could be so bold I might add that perhaps I’m simply more aware of when my brain is pretending and when it isn’t. That’s not a cut by the way, just an honest observation.
Perhaps there is an anomaly between our two brains, a slight difference that allows my brain to make this distinction. Whereas we can both enjoy that ability to pretend and be rewarded for same, my brain has an additional circuit, a subroutine that brings me back to reality at a different threshold. It’s not a tremendous difference but a difference nonetheless.
And perhaps there is something in your mental makeup, if not your soul, that is unwilling to be open to the possibility some of these things are true. If we were talking about these things 10 years ago, I would probably be in full agreement with you. Many others who are now Catholics/Christians would have agreed with you in the past. I thought all Christians were misguided, irrational kooks, and that belief in God was some sort of mental illness.
We can agree to disagree, but it’s my prayer and hope that consider the possibility of the supernatural as you journey this life. Even if your are on your death bed, perhaps you will see that the cost/benefit in seeking God’s mercy is worth pursuing. But I hope it’s well before that my friend. There is no guarantee that we will make it through the day.
May peace and love be with you…