Some issues (warning - a bit sensitive)

[John_of_Woking]

Hello

I suffer from scruples/ocd but I am trying to be calm and not get down about this.

Two quick questions.

1. Eating on Restaurants in Sundays.
2. Heavy petting with wife (outside the marital act)

Are either of these wrong?

On point 1 - I had booked a restaurant for today for the family and my bro’s family and just before I went there I had a fear that it may be wrong as it causes others to work on sunday. I had a check on an orthodox catholic website and most people said it was fine, a couple said it wasn’t. I then remembered some devout catholics had done it in the past and I remembered some seminarians eating on Easter Sunday Morning after the vigil mass at a restaurant. I rembered that for scrupuluous people that it is not always wrong to act in doubt (as often we are) and also I remembered being advised that if you think a devout person would do it then it is probably ok. So I went ahead and did it. Feel a bit scrupe’d out about it!

On point 2 - I have always been a bit confused about this. I know it can lead to excitement but then I know this will often be brief and not lead to the marital act. It is just a matter of showing affection but is it wrong if one does not intend to ‘renew the marriage vows’ so to speak?

Furthermore in the context of the marital act…Obviously oral sex would be not permissible if it was isolated from the marital act but what happens if someone briefly for a few seconds as part of foreplay…

I just want to do what’s right but there seem to be a lot of grey areas out there:shrug:

 

[user3856530]

For point one - what activity can you do on a Sunday that does not cause others, or have the potential to cause others to work? When were the clothes you are wearing made? could it have been a Sunday? Did the shepherds tend their flock on a Sunday to provide the wool for your clothes? If you eat meat, and cattle got sick on Sunday, did the vet work? Do you use electricity on a Sunday, or water, or the Fire service? Do you call an ambulance if there is an emergency - the list goes on and on.

Consider even buying a newspaper or loaf of bread early Monday morning. Did this not cause the baker and the newspaper company to work on Sunday evening?

Maybe the people working in the restaurant are relying on the money to feed their own families.

 

[Newbie2]

Hello

I suffer from scruples/ocd but I am trying to be calm and not get down about this.

Two quick questions.

1. Eating on Restaurants in Sundays.
2. Heavy petting with wife (outside the marital act)

Are either of these wrong? No.

On point 1 - I had booked a restaurant for today for the family and my bro’s family and just before I went there I had a fear that it may be wrong as it causes others to work on sunday. I had a check on an orthodox catholic website and most people said it was fine, a couple said it wasn’t. I then remembered some devout catholics had done it in the past and I remembered some seminarians eating on Easter Sunday Morning after the vigil mass at a restaurant. I rembered that for scrupuluous people that it is not always wrong to act in doubt (as often we are) and also I remembered being advised that if you think a devout person would do it then it is probably ok. So I went ahead and did it. Feel a bit scrupe’d out about it!

Forget about it. If they’re normally open for business, they’d be working even if they’re all athiests.

On point 2 - I have always been a bit confused about this. I know it can lead to excitement but then I know this will often be brief and not lead to the marital act. It is just a matter of showing affection but is it wrong if one does not intend to ‘renew the marriage vows’ so to speak?

Nope. Carry on.

Furthermore in the context of the marital act…Obviously oral sex would be not permissible if it was isolated from the marital act but what happens if someone briefly for a few seconds as part of foreplay…

No Problemo.

I just want to do what’s right but there seem to be a lot of grey areas out there:shrug:

Don’t worry about either of these.

 

[puzzleannie]

Hello

I suffer from scruples/ocd but I am trying to be calm and not get down about this.

Two quick questions.

1. Eating on Restaurants in Sundays.
2. Heavy petting with wife (outside the marital act)

Are either of these wrong?

if you suffer from scrupulosity these questions should be directed to one trusted confessor, not submitted to third parties. No I know of no moral reason either of those would be wrong, but if you have read or heard something that makes you fear otherwise you should ask that priest.

 

[neweyes]

There’s a lot of guilt going on here. I don’t know that these are deal-breakers for following Christ.