Some straight talk on sex

[JimG]

Lots of words have been written about the subject. Whole volumes of moral theology. Scholarly treatises. Internet discussions. Arguments about orientations and inclinations and varieties of sex.

Father Dwight Longenecker lays out the bare essentials. It’s pretty simply, really.

Some straight talk on sex.

 

[St_Francis]

This is a great article, altho I wish he had specified that activity which causes temptation ought also to be avoided.

This paragraph made me think:
Is [celibacy] difficult? Crazily, insanely difficult. And yet celibacy is achieved by many, many people who are single. Furthermore, many celibate people will say that the discipline of celibacy–while it was their cross to bear– was also the discipline that helped them grow as people and as followers of Jesus Christ.

What it made me think was that all acts of illicit sex are attempts to fix some broken thing inside us, or to fill an emptiness inside us. Thus, *illicit *acts do draw our attention away from Christ, as they promise (falsely) a solution only He can offer.

 

[MaryT777]

Great article.

Our parish had a gay outreach ministry to welcome gays to the Church and share the teaching of the Church on celibacy that echoes that in this article of course.

Our priest said, "it’s an equal opportunity celibacy requirement which includes everyone not married (Man/woman marriage of course) including myself. Several commented this helped them really see the requirement is not discriminatory.

He also noted it’s a struggle for many as noted in the article and can be a difficult cross to bear for many.

Mary.

 

[Thorolfr]

Great article.

Our parish had a gay outreach ministry to welcome gays to the Church and share the teaching of the Church on celibacy that echoes that in this article of course.

Our priest said, "it’s an equal opportunity celibacy requirement which includes everyone not married (Man/woman marriage of course) including myself. Several commented this helped them really see the requirement is not discriminatory.

He also noted it’s a struggle for many as noted in the article and can be a difficult cross to bear for many.

Mary.

So did a lot of celibate gays join your parish in response to your outreach ministry?

 

[Sy_Noe]

So did a lot of celibate gays join your parish in response to your outreach ministry?

Good question. Besides, unless they are sending policing into bedrooms of heterosexuals and homosexuals, and unless they are policing the bathroom medicine cabinets of heterosexuals for birth control pills, I don’t really know how they’d know who meets their stated requirement anyway.

 

[JimG]

Good question. Besides, unless they are sending policing into bedrooms of heterosexuals and homosexuals, and unless they are policing the bathroom medicine cabinets of heterosexuals for birth control pills, I don’t really know how they’d know who meets their stated requirement anyway.

It’s not a matter of knowing who does what or of policing behavior. but of making clear what Catholic doctrine is. That was the point of Fr. Longenecker’s blog post.

 

[Vera_Ljuba]

I looked at the article, and the first thing I noticed was the picture of the author. He seems to have some very bad headache or toothache… look at his grimace. Possibly due to the strange ideas he put professed. Poor guy.

The whole attitude concerning sex reminds me of some old jokes. They are about listeners submitting questions to the Armenian Radio. (This is an imaginary radio!)

Q: Is it possible to establish a Communist regime in Switzerland?
A: Yes, but why would anyone want to do that?

Q: Is it possible to have a platonic friendship between a man and a woman?
A: Sure, but what would be the point?

 

[MaryT777]

So did a lot of celibate gays join your parish in response to your outreach ministry?

My friend who is gay invited four people and I don’t’ know the size of the group that met for 5 meetings. Two of his friends joined and one is now our cantor. I don’t know the number of people that met for the 5 meeting outreach so I can’t tell you the percentage or number.

These were persons who were interested in coming back to the Church anyway but had expressed feelings of being unwanted in the Church.

Mary.

 

[MaryT777]

Good question. Besides, unless they are sending policing into bedrooms of heterosexuals and homosexuals, and unless they are policing the bathroom medicine cabinets of heterosexuals for birth control pills, I don’t really know how they’d know who meets their stated requirement anyway.

Oh, why of course they all were required to sign contracts vowing lifelong celibacy and have them notarized in the presence of two witnesses, the priest and the Bishop. Our heterosexual new members are required to sign a release giving the Church permission to have a Private Investigator search their medicine cabinets for birth control pills/devices.condoms with a Catholic dog that is specially trained to sniff out these items.

Mary

The meetings were merely to express the doctrine of the Church regarding sexuality, listen to the concerns they had feeling left out and alone often in the Church as gay persons, welcome them, address any struggles and any questions they had.

 

[BroIgnatius]

This is a great article, altho I wish he had specified that activity which causes temptation ought also to be avoided.

This paragraph made me think:
Is [celibacy] difficult? Crazily, insanely difficult. And yet celibacy is achieved by many, many people who are single. Furthermore, many celibate people will say that the discipline of celibacy–while it was their cross to bear– was also the discipline that helped them grow as people and as followers of Jesus Christ.

What it made me think was that all acts of illicit sex are attempts to fix some broken thing inside us, or to fill an emptiness inside us. Thus, *illicit *acts do draw our attention away from Christ, as they promise (falsely) a solution only He can offer.

I am surprised that Father uses the word “celibacy” incorrectly. Celibacy means a person is unmarried. All unmarried people are celibate. “Chastity” is what has to do with sexual activity. A Chaste person is a person who does not have sex outside of marriage. Chastity in perfect continence is permanent chastity, that is, permanent abstinence from sex, which are part of the the vows taken by religious (Chastity, Poverty, and Obedience, the Evangelical Counsels).

 

[goout]

Good question. Besides, unless they are sending policing into bedrooms of heterosexuals and homosexuals, and unless they are policing the bathroom medicine cabinets of heterosexuals for birth control pills, I don’t really know how they’d know who meets their stated requirement anyway.

I feel for you, that your understanding of sexual morality is so fundamentalist.
Please, give yourself room to breathe. (and others too)

 

[Thorolfr]

What it made me think was that all acts of illicit sex are attempts to fix some broken thing inside us, or to fill an emptiness inside us. Thus, *illicit *acts do draw our attention away from Christ, as they promise (falsely) a solution only He can offer.

So whether sex is within the bounds of a valid heterosexual marriage is the determining factor over whether it is to “fix some broken thing inside us, or to fill an emptiness inside us” or does not have something to do with brokenness or emptiness?

 

[CrystalMayner66]

Celibacy means a person is unmarried. All unmarried people are celibate.

:bigyikes:

Um, small correction…this is only one definition of “celibacy”, and it is not the definition most commonly used. No offense, but your comment sounds pretty hilarious in light of celibacy’s most frequently used definition, “abstention from sexual relations”.

dictionary.com/browse/celibate

 

[BroIgnatius]

:bigyikes:

Um, small correction…this is only one definition of “celibacy”, and it is not the definition most commonly used. No offense, but your comment sounds pretty hilarious in light of celibacy’s most frequently used definition, “abstention from sexual relations”.

dictionary.com/browse/celibate

:bigyikes:

Um, precise correction. No offense, but what is hilarious is that this is a Catholic Discussion board, and in the Catholic Church celibacy is as I mentioned. Not only that but the word itself, which comes from the Latin, does not mean abstaining from sex.(Etym. Latin caelibatus, single life, celibacy.)

Secular dictionaries include any definition of a word that is common, and not necessarily accurate or precise to the actual meaning of the word. The Catholic Church and the Catholic worldview prefers to be more precise. The world can use a little precision these days especially.

In addition, the context of my comments was how a priest used the word, and he should know the correct definition and should of taken the opportunity educate the public. Thus, I was not commenting on the laity and the general public’s vulgar sense of the word (again, using the classical definition of the word: from Latin vulgaris, from *vulgus *‘common people’).

From Father Hardon’s Modern Catholic Dictionary: CELIBACY. The state of being unmarried…

 

[goout]

:bigyikes:

Um, precise correction. No offense, but what is hilarious is that this is a Catholic Discussion board, and in the Catholic Church celibacy is as I mentioned. Not only that but the word itself, which comes from the Latin, does not mean abstaining from sex.(Etym. Latin caelibatus, single life, celibacy.)

Secular dictionaries include any definition of a word that is common, and not necessarily accurate or precise to the actual meaning of the word. The Catholic Church and the Catholic worldview prefers to be more precise. The world can use a little precision these days especially.

In addition, the context of my comments was how a priest used the word, and he should know the correct definition and should of taken the opportunity educate the public. Thus, I was not commenting on the laity and the general public’s vulgar sense of the word (again, using the classical definition of the word: from Latin vulgaris, from *vulgus *‘common people’).

From Father Hardon’s Modern Catholic Dictionary: CELIBACY. The state of being unmarried…

Celibacy
Chastity
Abstinence
Continence

related, but different

Unmarried (celibate) folk are (hopefully) abstaining chastely in continence. ( I just wanted to cram all 4 words into one sentence)

Married people are called to live conjugal chastity; others practice chastity in continence:

 

[BroIgnatius]

Celibacy
Chastity
Abstinence
Continence

related, but different

Unmarried (celibate) folk are (hopefully) abstaining chastely in continence. ( I just wanted to cram all 4 words into one sentence)

You got it. There is one more – perfect continence – permanent chastity as those called to priestly, religious, or permanent lay single life.

And Marital Chasity is more than fidelity (lack of adultery and masturbation and pornography). It is also not indulging in sexual practices, even with mutual consent, that degrade the human person, such as S&M, domination, and other things too disgusting to mention.

Martial sexuality is meant to be a mutual self-giving to each other that is open to life.

This means that marital sexuality is abused if the wife withholds sex from her husband as punishment or manipulation; or if the husband forces his wife, subtlety or aggressively, when she does not want to. The use of most sexual aids also falls into this category.

 

[Peter_J]

Good question. Besides, unless they are sending policing into bedrooms of heterosexuals and homosexuals, and unless they are policing the bathroom medicine cabinets of heterosexuals for birth control pills, I don’t really know how they’d know who meets their stated requirement anyway.

When I was in high school the big joke was about making people wear chastity belts.

 

[Sarcelle]

I looked at the article, and the first thing I noticed was the picture of the author. He seems to have some very bad headache or toothache… look at his grimace. Possibly due to the strange ideas he put professed. Poor guy.

The whole attitude concerning sex reminds me of some old jokes. They are about listeners submitting questions to the Armenian Radio. (This is an imaginary radio!)

Q: Is it possible to establish a Communist regime in Switzerland?
A: Yes, but why would anyone want to do that?

Q: Is it possible to have a platonic friendship between a man and a woman?
A: Sure, but what would be the point?

We have platonic relations with people of the opposite sex all the time.

For example between blood relatives, co-workers, etc.

The romantic/sexual relationship should be between spouses. The rest should be platonic.