Some thing I've been wondering about

[GEddie]

OK, Red, point taken.

 

[Le_Cracquere]

Of course no one is owed sex. However, many people desire it overwhelmingly and helplessly, to the extent that its absence is an abiding source of sadness & pain. If that doesn’t describe you, then beato te, as the man put it!

But please don’t be puzzled that other human beings have desires and priorities that aren’t yours, We each have our private crosses and our private battles: perhaps I wouldn’t fully understand your own if I knew them. But I’d be willing to accept that they’re genuine struggles, and wouldn’t make rash assumptions–or act as if only my private priorities and desires could possibly be normative.

 

[SusanneT]

I’m not sure if this is the right forum. Somebody correct it isn’t. So, I’ve been lurking here for a long time and read a lot of threads on hot-button sex issues. And, I cannot help but wonder, why do people act like or think that sex is an inalienable human right? Maybe I’m just young and stupid, but, when people make a fuss over it, it sounds the same to me like people making a fuss over cake. I never had sex, but, I guess it’s nice and cake is nice, but, there is more to life than cake. I don’t know I’m just confused. I’m just surprised nobody has petitioned for an amendment to be made in the Constitution to guarantee a right to sex in order to shut up the opposition on gay marriage, abortion, etc.

There is a right to marry if you choose and as Catholics, in marriage a right to be open to and welcome children, to that extent there is a “right” to sex.

But the “right” you are suggesting people want, to sexual gratification as an end in itself, has lead to the raft of sins, immorality and evil we see everyday, in pornography, masturbation, homosexual acts, fornication and abortion all spured on by the availability and acceptance of contraception.

 

[redbetta]

Sex is very powerful. God made us sexual beings, and He made sex good, and sacred. We distort it. Because it is so good, there is potential for great distortion. Those facts go a long way in explaining the fascination with it. There is a very real appetite for it.

On the other hand, I believe St. Thomas Aquinas said that someone who isn’t well experienced with spiritual delights will very often substitute with sexual ones. It might have been St. Augustine, but I think it was Aquinas. That should indicate how important sexuality is to God.

You’re absolutely correct that the fight against abortion must necessarily involve our attitudes about sex. I’ve run into it again and again. Moreover, it means people need to encounter Christ in a powerful way.

This is great and I agree, but, when discussing these issues with people on a secular campus, I cannot bring up God or sin, so I’m not sure how to present a different attitude towards sex.

 

[Little_Sheep]

For most of us, our sexual life and choices are one of our most intimate and sacred spaces. Our sexual behavior has profound power to impact our lives in positive and negative ways. Sex is so profound that it can create human life! But outside of that miracle, it offers many other benefits - it solidifies the unitive bonds of our most important meaningful relationships, reduces stress and leads to longer, happier lives.

It is a great gift from our Creator. Like any other gift, it can be misused and when it is misused, it’s power can be destructive.

It is, of course, a right. No one (certainly not our government) has the power to tell a person how they should use their sexuality or behave sexually, outside the scope of sexual crimes (which are more about violence than sex, per se). It is a private thing and that is why most of us are not open to much meddling in our sexual affairs.

 

[Little_Sheep]

I understand that, but, people can at least acknowledge that sexual misuse /addiction is bad and damaging even if there is no way it can be regulated. But, I remember someone posted a letter on CAF of a woman to her father on how his porn use hurt her. The article got a lot of hostile comments saying that she had the problem, not her dad.

I really don’t know any people who DON’T acknowledge this.

 

[HerCrazierHalf]

This is great and I agree, but, when discussing these issues with people on a secular campus, I cannot bring up God or sin, so I’m not sure how to present a different attitude towards sex.

From the secular end of things sex like other decisions are personal choices with societal impacts. The big impact being STDs and children. The cost (beyond fiscal) of public health issues. The problem of fatherless children plus the crime and economic issues is a huge one too. But for both of these, the impacts are lessening as time goes on for reasons such as the reduction in accidental pregnancies.

So the secular discussion quickly circles around the individual’s wants vs societal wants. Which one wins out is tough to say.

 

[Trident_H]

Okay, I guess the whole sex as a drug thing has been pointless. Alright, I got an article out of this thread that can possibly serve me well. There has been one thing that has been bothering me. I’m part of a pro-life group and we have been discussing things like disabilities, helping new moms, boycotting the “R” word, etc. But, we never talk about sex and, I for one do not believe we can eliminate the scourge of abortion if we do not change society’s attitudes toward sex. Now, I am wondering what am I going to say if I’m talking to someone about why abortion is wrong and they ask, “what about sex?” Naturally, I would respond, “what about it?” Now, I have never heard of anyone being so base as to say that abortion can’t be wrong because it would mean he/she cannot go around having sex anytime, anyplace. I would certainly acknowledge some people will need to amend their way of life to avoid this evil. But, if it is truly a life at stake, one needs to do it even if he or she does not like it. Slave owners did not like having to free their slaves and trying to figure out how to run their plantations without them, but, emancipation had to come. I don’t know, I feel like if I express my attitudes towards casual sex, I would get in trouble with the group for bad PR. But, these issues go together.

Yet truth it truth. And I’ve learned this. It’s easier to make decisions on the front end than on the back end. It’s easier to decide to leave sex off the table because a guy cares about his future children than it is to try to figure out what to do with an unexpected pregnancy.

And what I mean by it’s easier to decide is that it’s easier to decide that before the date even starts. Not after some heavy stuff has already started happening. So before the date starts they decide to go somewhere public. And stay there. No going to each other’s houses. No parking on a lonely road. Make the easy choices so you don’t have to make the hard ones later. Or something.

Peace

-Trident

 

[redbetta]

Yet truth it truth. And I’ve learned this. It’s easier to make decisions on the front end than on the back end. It’s easier to decide to leave sex off the table because a guy cares about his future children than it is to try to figure out what to do with an unexpected pregnancy.

And what I mean by it’s easier to decide is that it’s easier to decide that before the date even starts. Not after some heavy stuff has already started happening. So before the date starts they decide to go somewhere public. And stay there. No going to each other’s houses. No parking on a lonely road. Make the easy choices so you don’t have to make the hard ones later. Or something.

Peace

-Trident

Trident, I am not sure whether or not that answered my question, but, there is still a lot of wisdom there and seeing it made me happy. I love your posts.

 

[Trident_H]

Trident, I am not sure whether or not that answered my question, but, there is still a lot of wisdom there and seeing it made me happy. I love your posts.

Thanks RB. You gave me a nice boost with that. Unexpected and everything.

Hope the world tilts the right way for you today.

Peace.

-Trident