Some things I DON'T like about mass

[Speedypizza]

Just a few things I don’t like about the mass, maybe somebody can help me see where I am wrong in this, or at least how to feel better about it.

1. The sign of peace. It is not the sign of peace so much as it is the placement of it. It just seems so out of place at that point, after the climax of the mass, to stop and shake hands.
2. The holding of hands during the Our Father. I know this issue has been done to death, but my issue is a little different. I would not mind holding hands during it if we had the Our Father at closing or at the opening. It just seems almost rude to be doing this after the priest calls Jesus into sight.
3. Going up for a blessing on Sundays. Half the time I get a blessing from a lay person, and sometimes the way they bless me seems very off. I have had them do the formal “blessing” like is done at the end of the mass. I thought only a priest or deacon could do that? Even if I get the priest, it is a **** shoot as to which kind I will get. (I have had them place their hand on my head, place there palm on my forehead, make a cross on my forehead, do a full blessing and once just put his hand on my shoulder and say “God bless you”) I would like to just skip it, however it is very hard to do when I am 300 pounds and everybody else has to climb over me if I decide to stay. I wish there was a few rows put aside for those who are not going up, for whatever reason.
4. Watching some people receive our Lord with as much respect as I would have eating a Ritz cracker. (I must say that I see a lot less of this now that I am attending a largely Hispanic Church on Sundays, The level of respect and love shown to our Lord brings tears to my eyes) This really bothers me because I cannot yet receive, yet others who do don’t seem to understand what they are doing.

Pax

 

[charliedrake]

With all these complaints makes one wonder the direction you are going.

 

[nocrazs]

Just a few things I don’t like about the mass, maybe somebody can help me see where I am wrong in this, or at least how to feel better about it.

1. The sign of peace. It is not the sign of peace so much as it is the placement of it. It just seems so out of place at that point, after the climax of the mass, to stop and shake hands.
2. The holding of hands during the Our Father. I know this issue has been done to death, but my issue is a little different. I would not mind holding hands during it if we had the Our Father at closing or at the opening. It just seems almost rude to be doing this after the priest calls Jesus into sight.
3. Going up for a blessing on Sundays. Half the time I get a blessing from a lay person, and sometimes the way they bless me seems very off. I have had them do the formal “blessing” like is done at the end of the mass. I thought only a priest or deacon could do that? Even if I get the priest, it is a **** shoot as to which kind I will get. (I have had them place their hand on my head, place there palm on my forehead, make a cross on my forehead, do a full blessing and once just put his hand on my shoulder and say “God bless you”) I would like to just skip it, however it is very hard to do when I am 300 pounds and everybody else has to climb over me if I decide to stay. I wish there was a few rows put aside for those who are not going up, for whatever reason.
4. Watching some people receive our Lord with as much respect as I would have eating a Ritz cracker. (I must say that I see a lot less of this now that I am attending a largely Hispanic Church on Sundays, The level of respect and love shown to our Lord brings tears to my eyes) This really bothers me because I cannot yet receive, yet others who do don’t seem to understand what they are doing.

Pax

These are goods things not to like about the Mass. These are random and out of place in the Catholic Mass. We are not Protestants, so why act like one?

 

[Aelred_Minor]

Number 1 is basically under review by the Church at the moment, the last I knew. It may or may not change in the near future.

Numbers 2 and 3 are just problems at your local community. I’d say just don’t hold hands if you can prevent it without undue insult, and don’t go up for a silly “blessing” from an Extraordinary Minister of Holy Communion (or even a blessing for the priest- you’ll get your blessing at the end of mass with everyone else). That’s no definitive Church ruling against these things, just my personal suggestion. To help people get around you, just get up and stand aside as others in your pew go forward, and as they come back. It could help to sit at the edge of the pew, especially when it comes to your own sitting back down after everyone has returned.

Number 4 is a tricky question. It’s very hard to judge a person’s internal spiritual life, and the temptation to judge a person’s reception of the Eucharist by their external demeanor is something to be avoided. One of those people could be in an amazing spiritual ecstasy together with a special grace to be able to hide it, for all you know. On the other hand someone might appear to be receiving with great devotion but really is receiving sacrilegiously. Probably the first is not going to be the case and hopefully not the second, but the point is you can’t and shouldn’t judge the worthiness of other people as they receive communion.

 

[erine]

I agree with you on all the above points. Have you tried a traditional Latin mass? That should solve it form the most part!

 

[mariyka]

A solution for #3 is to file out with everyone, but step back to allow the rest of the row after you to step ahead of you. Then step back into the row and go over to the opposite end, while they receive. When the first person in your row comes back after receiving the Eucharist, stand beside your row, allowing them to return to their seats, and go back in behind the person that was sitting next to you.

It sounds more complicated than it is, but works very well.

 

[Mrs_Sally]

Number 1 is basically under review by the Church at the moment, the last I knew. It may or may not change in the near future.

Numbers 2 and 3 are just problems at your local community. I’d say just don’t hold hands if you can prevent it without undue insult, and don’t go up for a silly “blessing” from an Extraordinary Minister of Holy Communion (or even a blessing for the priest- you’ll get your blessing at the end of mass with everyone else). That’s no definitive Church ruling against these things, just my personal suggestion. To help people get around you, just get up and stand aside as others in your pew go forward, and as they come back. It could help to sit at the edge of the pew, especially when it comes to your own sitting back down after everyone has returned.

Number 4 is a tricky question. It’s very hard to judge a person’s internal spiritual life, and the temptation to judge a person’s reception of the Eucharist by their external demeanor is something to be avoided. One of those people could be in an amazing spiritual ecstasy together with a special grace to be able to hide it, for all you know. On the other hand someone might appear to be receiving with great devotion but really is receiving sacrilegiously. Probably the first is not going to be the case and hopefully not the second, but the point is you can’t and shouldn’t judge the worthiness of other people as they receive communion.

Excellent answer. We need to be very careful to separate actions by individual members of a congregation from actual abuse or illicit practices in the liturgy.

 

[Joe_5859]

The only one of the four that has anything to do with the actual structure of the Mass is #1. In the Gospels, Jesus tells us to make peace with our brother before approaching the altar of the Lord. Thus, we exchange the Sign of Peace as a symbol of this reconciling with others before we approach to receive Our Lord in the Eucharist.

Holding hands during the Our Father is not mentioned in the liturgical rubrics at all. It certainly isn’t required practice.

Receiving blessings during Communion time is also not part of the rubrics. A while back, couple of CAF members actually wrote the Congregation for Divine Worship and the Discipline of the Sacraments on this issue and the response back they received was that blessings should not take place at this time. I don’t think the CDWDS reponse rises to the level of making it a hard and fast rubric, but it’s a step towards that end.

For # 4, I simply recommend paying closer attention to one’s own disposition rather than those around us. We don’t know what’s going on in other people’s hearts and it would be wrong of us to presume irreverence. Certainly, the way people dress and behave lends often itself easily to such conclusions, but I think that the devil uses such things to distract us from paying attention to what we are doing.

 

[Jim_Dandy]

Two of the complaints you list are not authorized by the Catholic Church – holding hands during the Our Father (the Lord’s Prayer) and blessings in lieu of Holy Communion.

Congregation for Divine Worship and the Discipline of the Sacraments (Protocol No. 930/08/L):

Quote:

1. The liturgical blessing of the Holy Mass is properly given to each and to all at the conclusion of the Mass, just a few moments subsequent to the distribution of Holy Communion.
2. Lay people, within the context of Holy Mass, are unable to confer blessings. These blessings, rather, are the competence of the priest (cf. Ecclesia de Mysterio, Notitiae 34 (15 Aug. 1997), art. 6, § 2; Canon 1169, § 2; and Roman Ritual De Benedictionibus (1985), n. 18).
3. Furthermore, the laying on of a hand or hands — which has its own sacramental significance, inappropriate here — by those distributing Holy Communion, in substitution for its reception, is to be explicitly discouraged.
4. The Apostolic Exhortation Familiaris Consortio n. 84, “forbids any pastor, for whatever reason to pretext even of a pastoral nature, to perform ceremonies of any kind for divorced people who remarry”. To be feared is that any form of blessing in substitution for communion would give the impression that the divorced and remarried have been returned, in some sense, to the status of Catholics in good standing.
5. In a similar way, for others who are not to be admitted to Holy Communion in accord with the norm of law, the Church’s discipline has already made clear that they should not approach Holy Communion nor receive a blessing. This would include non-Catholics and those envisaged in can. 915 (i.e., those under the penalty of excommunication or interdict, and others who obstinately persist in manifest grave sin).

REDEMTIONIS SACRAMENTUM

CHAPTER VIII

REMEDIES

1. Grave Matters[173.] Although the gravity of a matter is to be judged in accordance with the common teaching of the Church and the norms established by her, objectively to be considered among grave matters is anything that puts at risk the validity and dignity of the Most Holy Eucharist: namely, anything that contravenes what is set out above in nn. 48-52, 56, 76-77, 79, 91-92, 94, 96, 101-102, 104, 106, 109, 111, 115, 117, 126, 131-133, 138, 153 and 168.

This ritual appears nowhere in the approved liturgical books of the Church. In fact, a person, on his own authority, cannot invent a ritual and insert into the Mass.

The Documents of Vatican II, Sacrosanctum Concilium, III. The Reform of the Sacred Liturgy, A. General Norms: 3:

Therefore no other person, even if he be a priest, may add, remove, or change anything in the Liturgy on his own authority.

**Redemptionis Sacramentum: **

[11.] The Mystery of the Eucharist “is too great for anyone to permit himself to treat it according to his own whim, so that its sacredness and its universal ordering would be obscured”.27 On the contrary, anyone who acts thus by giving free rein to his own inclinations, even if he is a Priest, injures the substantial unity of the Roman Rite, which ought to be vigorously preserved,28 and becomes responsible for actions that are in no way consistent with the hunger and thirst for the living God that is experienced by the people today.

**Catechism of the Catholic Church: **

1125 For this reason {lex orandi, lex credendi, the Church believes as she prays] no sacramental rite may be modified or manipulated at the will of the minister or the community. Even the supreme authority in the Church may not change the liturgy arbitrarily, but only in obedience of faith and with religious respect for the mystery of the liturgy.

END QUOTES

I agree with you about the Sign of Peace. The Catholic bishops have discussed moving it but no action has been taken as yet.

Those who attend the Sacrifice of the Mass should give their complete attention to what’s happening at the altar. Every Catholic is responsible to God for the way he or she dresses and worships Him; we should not pay attention to others or criticize.

 

[Kerry77]

I agree with you, I wrote a similar post recently.

 

[martininthefiel]

I think the Order of the Mass is perfect, just the way it is. Smarter people than I write the rules. It has ever been so.

All of us have our preferences as to minor variations in different congregations, but these are completely trivial matters. There are times I do not like the specific selection of hymns, but I go to a parish, where on the whole, I like the music. If I didn’t, I would find a parish where the music is more to my liking.

Personally, I like passing the Peace, but I also understand that some people don’t. If you don’t like to pass the Peace, no one is twisting your arm to do so. But, you might want to examine your conscience about why it disturbs you so much. Not to judge, but I know that when I want to avoid contact with others, there is usually something going-on in me that has absolutely nothing to do with them. In my mind, we serve God by serving others. Consider the possibility that your conveying your desire that they know the Peace of our Lord is doing a lonely person in the pew a great service. It is not merely a good wish, it is a blessing you are conferring on another person. Love sometimes requires us to do things we don’t especially feel like doing.

If you don’t like holding hands at the OF, then don’t. I usually do not, but it doesn’t bother me if other people do. It never occurred to have an opinion on the subject. If the person next to me offers their hand, I gladly take it. I usually do not place my hands in the orens position either, but it bothers me not one wit if the person next to, or in front of, me does. If the pastor of the parish doesn’t want people to do so, it’s his job, not mine, to tell them not to.

If you don’t want to go up for a blessing if you are not disposed to receive, stand-up and step to one side to let other people get out of the pew. Pretty simple.

I trust that my pastor, who has been through years of training, knows what he is doing. I defer to him in matters concerning the liturgy. I do not know enough to judge what other people do. I do not know what’s in their hearts when they receive.

The Eucharist is, indeed, a solemn occasion, but it is also a joyous one. In it we become one body by, in, and with Christ, in the unity of the Holy Spirit.

 

[puzzleannie]

1. The sign of peace. It is not the sign of peace so much as it is the placement of it. It just seems so out of place at that point, after the climax of the mass, to stop and shake hands.

I’m with you, seems like somewhere up front around the penitential rite, as in some of the Eastern rite Masses (which some have the OF up front as well).

1. The holding of hands during the Our Father.

not part of the Mass so no point in complaining about at as if it were.

1. Going up for a blessing on Sundays

.
ditto
\4.

Watching some people receive our Lord with as much respect as I would have eating a Ritz cracker.

(I
ditto x 2
just because people in the pews don’t know or care what is going on, means criticism of their lack of proper teaching, not of the Mass itself.

However, none of these are the problem.
the inability to focus on what is really happening at Mass, on the altar, not in the pews, is the problem, and when you are able to do that better–and it takes time, concentration, and prayer-- the rest of the petty irritations will melt away.

 

[TimothyH]

Just a few things I don’t like about the mass, maybe somebody can help me see where I am wrong in this, or at least how to feel better about it.

1. Watching some people receive our Lord with as much respect as I would have eating a Ritz cracker. (I must say that I see a lot less of this now that I am attending a largely Hispanic Church on Sundays, The level of respect and love shown to our Lord brings tears to my eyes) This really bothers me because I cannot yet receive, yet others who do don’t seem to understand what they are doing.

Pax

Worry about your own sins and forget what everyone else does. You have no control over what they do anyway. Our own behavior should give us enough to think about before and after we dare to approach the altar of Jesus Christ’s body and blood. Our own sins are enough of a disrespect to Jesus that we should fear for our own salvation rather than worrying about what other people do or don’t do.

***Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassion, kindness, lowliness, meekness, and patience, forbearing one another *and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in the one body. And be thankful. (Colossians 3:12-15)

We really have no idea how God is working in those people’s lives, how patient he is being with those people, like he was with me for 42 years, and what plans he has for thier salvation.

I would try do exactly as Paul says. Complaining on an internet forum really does no one any good.

-Tim-

 

[willofgods]

Hi Speedypizza, I’ll try to help you “feel better about it” in 15 minutes or it’s free! (I crave so much now!)

1. The sign of peace. It is not the sign of peace so much as it is the placement of it. It just seems so out of place at that point, after the climax of the mass, to stop and shake hands.

We are about to receive the Eucharist and enter into Communion with the Lord our Savior, which should ultimately be the goal of all souls. In heaven we will all be saints and as such, belong to the communion of saints. This sign of peace is more a sign of spiritual communion with our fellow parishioners, in that we recognize each other in our common goal of Heaven.

1. The holding of hands during the Our Father. I know this issue has been done to death, but my issue is a little different. I would not mind holding hands during it if we had the Our Father at closing or at the opening. It just seems almost rude to be doing this after the priest calls Jesus into sight.

I don’t hold hands myself, but it does bring back memories of my sister trying to throw my hands up as high as she could at the “Yours is the Kingdom, the power, and the glory” section.
The good about it is that it reminds us that praying alone is good, but praying together is good too (as long as your little teenage sister isn’t permanently silly), and the same idea above goes here too; we are trying to get to Heaven and should want our whole Church to get there too.

1. Going up for a blessing on Sundays. Half the time I get a blessing from a lay person, and sometimes the way they bless me seems very off. I have had them do the formal “blessing” like is done at the end of the mass. I thought only a priest or deacon could do that? Even if I get the priest, it is a **** shoot as to which kind I will get. (I have had them place their hand on my head, place there palm on my forehead, make a cross on my forehead, do a full blessing and once just put his hand on my shoulder and say “God bless you”) I would like to just skip it, however it is very hard to do when I am 300 pounds and everybody else has to climb over me if I decide to stay. I wish there was a few rows put aside for those who are not going up, for whatever reason.

We don’t always get the blessings we want or prefer in real life either. Take it as an opportunity to thank God for the “blessings in disguise” that He always gives us.
Take the opportunity too as you approach our Lord in the Bread to adore Him. It is really Him! If He were standing in the front of the Church in human form, would you not scramble over everyone to try to get closer to Him, even if you couldn’t touch Him?
If you had to have some slob with their cut-off shirt covered in pizza stains and their hair all greasy under their worn out ball cap and with a cigarette in mouth, touch your head and say “mushroom, pepperoni”, before you could stand next to Him, would you hesitate at all? (N.B., I have never ever encountered such a Eucharistic Minister, ever and never will!) And in real life, they are asking God to bless you, even if it isn’t always eloquent or satisfying in its vocal, physical form, the spiritual form is all that matters.

1. Watching some people receive our Lord with as much respect as I would have eating a Ritz cracker. (I must say that I see a lot less of this now that I am attending a largely Hispanic Church on Sundays, The level of respect and love shown to our Lord brings tears to my eyes) This really bothers me because I cannot yet receive, yet others who do don’t seem to understand what they are doing.

I’m not sure what respect towards a Ritz cracker consists of , but I’ll make a stab at three possibilities.
Are you talking about them not bowing or kneeling before receiving? Out of charity, the best we can do is hope they are standing in awe before Him.
If receiving in the hands bothers you, for many it is out of habit, and indeed to receive on the tongue would lead them to no longer concentrate on the Eucharist itself, or even drop it out of their mouth to the floor!
Or maybe you are referring to chewing the Host? (I can’t imagine that they take a bite out of the Bread, half still in hand, then finish it with a second bite…I would die inside…) The first time I received Communion as a kid, I wasn’t told not to chew, so I did. My dad corrected me after the Mass, and from then on, I never touched the Eucharist to my teeth again.
That said,

John 6:54 Then Jesus said to them: Amen, amen I say unto you: Except you eat the flesh of the Son of man, and drink his blood, you shall not have life in you.

You may have heard this before, but note that in the ancient Greek manuscripts we find Jesus Himself use the word “tragôn” to convey the word ‘eat’ which translates to “gnaw/chew”. If He said it that way Himself, it can’t be all that bad to “tragôn” the Eucharist, can it?

Pax

 

[bcra]

first of all you are wrong on #2 i have never never held hands with anyone during the hour father at any time in my life. i have never seen anyone in our church holding hands or any catholic church ever so where is this done?[/BIBLEDRB]

 

[nickybr38]

I’m going to agree with what someone else said about the inability to focus.

As you settle in and become more used to Mass I think you will find that what that person over there is wearing, that those people over there are holding hands (or forcing you to hold THEIR hand), how that person is receiving will fade into background noise and/or mild irritations at best.

When you focus inward instead of outward I think you’ll enjoy the Mass much more.

I struggle now and then with irritations at my parish (where actual abuses go on here or there - and no I won’t list them, I’ve done so before, no point rehashing) but whenever I start to feel frustrated I just focus on Christ. That’s why I’m at Mass. To be with Christ. My Christian brothers and sisters are a bonus, not the main event.

 

[Filii_Dei]

#1: I see what you mean but until the bishops decide to move it elsewhere, we can live with it rather than fight it. Also, the shaking of the hands is optional. One can smile and bow.

#2: Like what the other posters have said, it’s not an issue of the mass. The bishops and priests have directed time and again that we are not to hold hands at the Lord’s Prayer, but old habits die hard, and the clergy don’t have the patience to enforce relatively minor things like this. So long as the faithful aren’t doing something antithetical to the mass like bursting into tongues, they’ll just tolerate it.

#3: Technically, laity can validly give blessings, but they cannot do this in the context of the mass. In fact, even if non-communicants go up to the deacons and priests for blessings, the problem is that nobody should be going up for blessings. The communion line is for one thing and one thing alone: communion. I understand your desire to be blessed, but the priest gives a blessing to all the faithful at the end of the mass, so going up for ‘another’ blessing does not make it any more efficacious. Again, this is one of those mistaken practices that have persisted with the laity, and the clergy and EMHC just have to adapt to it.

#4: It may peeve you, but some cradle Catholics have been brought up so used to it that they don’t really think twice before consuming the Holy Eucharist. It’s typical for there to be people of varying degrees of piety. Honestly, I think it’s at least better that they are present to receive the Lord rather than to be regularly absent from mass. There is always the opportunity for them to be reawakened and inspired to live out their faith more fully. Nonetheless, I am certainly gladdened by your passion to receive the Body and Blood of Christ, and I certainly look forward to welcoming you to the family.

Pax vobiscum.

 

[nickybr38]

first of all you are wrong on #2 i have never never held hands with anyone during the hour father at any time in my life. i have never seen anyone in our church holding hands or any catholic church ever so where is this done?[/BIBLEDRB]

It’s done in every Canadian parish I’ve attended so far.

 

[Speedypizza]

Thank you all for your reply’s. I hope nobody is thinking that I want to change the mass for the benefit of me. Mostly I am just throwing out some of my grips. To the person who said I need to think about why the sign of piece bothers me, as I said in my posting, it is not the sign of piece itself that bothers me, it is where it is in the mass. As far as going to the EF, I think that is a great idea. I also thank the people who said I should not worry about how others appear to be receiving communion, you are right, I should not be judging others in that way. I really don’t know what is going on in their heads and heart. As far as the blessing goes, I only started to do that because my deacon told me to.

Pax

 

[YoungTradCath]

Thank you all for your reply’s. I hope nobody is thinking that I want to change the mass for the benefit of me. Mostly I am just throwing out some of my grips. To the person who said I need to think about why the sign of piece bothers me, as I said in my posting, it is not the sign of piece itself that bothers me, it is where it is in the mass. As far as going to the EF, I think that is a great idea. I also thank the people who said I should not worry about how others appear to be receiving communion, you are right, I should not be judging others in that way. I really don’t know what is going on in their heads and heart. As far as the blessing goes, I only started to do that because my deacon told me to.

Pax

Yeah, don’t do the blessing thing anymore. Just exit the pew to let people out, and then do the same to let them back in when the time comes. I would sit on the outer edge of the pew, that is, the edge farthest from the center aisle, because then, you will only have to get up when people come back to sit down and not when they initially go up. This way, you can sit as close to the front as you so please without feeling awkward for not going up to receive communion.

Remember, everyone gets a blessing at the end of mass anyways. It is improper for people to tell others who can’t receive communion to go up to receive a blessing.