Someone please wish me Happy Anniversary

[Gearoidin]

Happy Anniversary! Maybe next year you should plan something together. We always do this because my DH never remembers any birthdays, anniversaries,etc. He even forgot Christmas one year

Gearoidin

 

[mamacita]

**HAPPY ANNIVERSARY KCT!!!
:clapping:

I know what you mean. My 30th b-day was a few weeks ago. We went out to dinner the night before, and I treated myself to a massage and pedicure. However, the day of my b-day felt so depressing. No flowers, no cake, no nothing. I had made an egg casserole the night before so all he had to do for breakfast was put it in the oven. I was pretty upset to say the least. I don’t understand it. Every b-day for him, I have made him feel special w/ a cake and for his 30th a surprise party AND out to dinner as well. Even on Father’s day, he got cards, gifts, and a cake from me. However, Mother’s day, just card as usual, no flowers, no nothing and not to mention that at the time he was living 3 states away while I am a single mother of 3 and pregnant.
So I did tell him I didn’t want a party since I am so preggo right now I wasn’t in the mood for one. But I never said not to buy me flowers or a cake! :banghead: The sad part is that about 2 days before I hinted about him baking me a cake AND HE still didn’t do it!!! So lo and behold, my mom rescued him by having me over that night for cake and she bought me flowers, she knew I was upset. However I told him he still has to redeem himself at some point in time of his choosing, he’s not getting off that easy!! I don’t mean to sound harsh but I was warned by my good friend that if you keep silent it will happen like this next year too. It’s sad how so many men don’t see to it to make their wife feel special on special occasions but yet we see to it to make them a nice dinner everyday and keep their laundry done, doesn’t make sense to me, I suppose it never will. **

 

[LilyM]

Happy Anniversary! Maybe next year you should plan something together. We always do this because my DH never remembers any birthdays, anniversaries,etc. He even forgot Christmas one year

Gearoidin

Is that even possible? Were you maybe living in Japan at the time? (I can imagine not such a big deal is made of it there)

 

[Gamera]

Happy Anniversary!!!

 

[cheddarsox]

I have overheard men speaking about this type of situation. I have heard them say that one reason for it is this…sometimes they do something they think is very special, they stop on the way home from work and pick up a little something for us…and we don’t notice, or even make a nitpicky comment on it. They were floating on air, thinking they had done well, and their balloon gets popped.

They get to feeling that on an important day, they can never do enough. No matter what effort they make, we will find some reason to feel it isn’t enough. So…they give up before they begin. “Forgot”, is an excuse for “who do something only to have her tell me it’s not enough anyway?”

Anyway, that is what I heard them saying.

Looking at my years with my husband. I can see it. Just the other day he used a chunk of a gift card he’d received to buy me a book. It was the right series, but the wrong book. He didn’t realize there were other books in the series, he had overheard me talking about wanting one and he went out and got it. A very sweet thing, a very sweet surprise. I should have kept my mouth shut about it being the wrong book…but I didn’t. Me BAD.

And you know what? I LOVE the book. I haven’t read this one either…so what was my problem? I don’t know, just in a mood and feeling sorry for myself, and focusing more on the book than the fact that this sweet man used his own gift to surprise ME.

I can name two dozen other incidents when I’ve made him feel bad for doing something nice. I’m lucky he bothers at all anymore, because I can be quite snippy when things aren’t done just my way.

I am working harder at seeing things from his side, now that I’ve heard that discussion.

This may not apply at all to other people’s situations, but unfortunatly I am guilty, so I thought I’d share this possibility.

 

[Gearoidin]

Is that even possible? Were you maybe living in Japan at the time? (I can imagine not such a big deal is made of it there)

Christmas is huge here but it not exactly Christmas with any religious meaning. It is more like Santa + St. Valentine’s Day. There are Christmas decorations in all the shops and some homes from the end of November, Christmas songs in the arcades, Santa’s everywhere and Christmas trees with some very strange decoration (eg large neon dolphins). He knew it was coming, it would be hard not to notice, just didn’t remember it was that day.

Gearoidin

 

[pumpkinbeast]

Happy Anniversary, KCT!!!

I’m starting to realize just how lucky I am with my bf… we’ve been together for over 2 years now, and though he will forget about everything and anything, no matter how many times I remind him, he has NEVER forgotten the anniversary of the start of our courtship, or Valentine’s Day. He got me a single rose for our first Valentine’s together, and another for our first year anniversary. The next Valentine’s, he had classes all day before, so by the time he got to the flowershop, they had no roses left. But never fear, he picked out HIMSELF a bouquet of purple flowers(my favorite color!!!), with a bit of help from the lady at the store. It was a really elegant arrangement, I was very impressed! For our second year, he got my three roses. He claims that each year he’s giving me 3^(n-1) where ‘n’ is the number of years we’ve been together. So first year: 3^(1-1)=1; second year 3^(2-1)=3. He’s a math wizard, what can I say? And he’s never forgotten my bday or Christmas(he does have it a bit easy there, because my bday is the 19th of Dec. )

I hope this doesn’t make you feel worse KCT, I just wanted to share that not all men forget anniversaries! I know 2 years isn’t very long in the grand scheme of things, so I’ll have to wait and see if his ability to remember these important dates stays, but I think it will.

 

[CatholicSam]

For our second year, he got my three roses. He claims that each year he’s giving me 3^(n-1) where ‘n’ is the number of years we’ve been together. So first year: 3^(1-1)=1; second year 3^(2-1)=3. He’s a math wizard, what can I say? And he’s never forgotten my bday or Christmas(he does have it a bit easy there, because my bday is the 19th of Dec. )

Cute cute cute! My hubby gives me 1^n roses on the anniversary of the science fair where we met (so I get one red rose every year ). We used to creat our own little math counting theorems while we were dating, and now that he’s an actuary, we come up with family-related applications of actuarial methods (like pregnancy test probabilities, benefits of a large family size, etc.).

And Happy Anniversary, KCT! I’m glad you had a nice dinner together! And hopefully your DH realizes how important this day is to you and remembers to make it special next year.

 

[FLCathMom]

Happy Anniversary!

If it makes you feel any better, I am the one prone to forgetting special occasions, and I love my husband to pieces. I would almost certainly forget my own birthday if people didn’t tell me it was coming up. Last year, my aunt reminded me the week before and I still was caught by surprise by it. Fortunately, I now have my own little “reminder elves” (my kids)- they love marking the calendar and looking at it and talking about what is coming up next.

 

[rayne89]

Happy Anniversary!!!:extrahappy:

I’m really sorry about your hubby. You know I’ve been married 16 years we don’t do cards/ presents regularly anymore. It’s sounds terribly unromantic I know -the first year I was married I sent him (he is was in the Navy) a card every month for our anniversary -1st month anniversary, 2nd month anniversary etc. It’s not that we’re not happy because my marriage is better than it’s ever been, I guess we just don’t need those “Hallmark moments” to celebrate it anymore.

If your hubby is a good guy in all the ways that count I’d let this slide or you could simply remind him. When something is important to me I’ll simply remind him -yes also very unromantic I know. I’ll say something like “Are you and dd going shopping for my b-day on Saturday?” Hint, Hint. Hubby get’s so busy with work he forgets to do these things. He works hard for us though so I forgive him. There was a book I read back when hubby was in the Navy called 1001 Ways to be Romantic. I went through it, highlighted all the ideas I liked and mailed it to him . That worked too.

 

[rayne89]

Happy Anniversary, KCT!!!

I’m starting to realize just how lucky I am with my bf… we’ve been together for over 2 years now, and though he will forget about everything and anything, no matter how many times I remind him, he has NEVER forgotten the anniversary of the start of our courtship, or Valentine’s Day. He got me a single rose for our first Valentine’s together, and another for our first year anniversary. The next Valentine’s, he had classes all day before, so by the time he got to the flowershop, they had no roses left. But never fear, he picked out HIMSELF a bouquet of purple flowers(my favorite color!!!), with a bit of help from the lady at the store. It was a really elegant arrangement, I was very impressed! For our second year, he got my three roses. He claims that each year he’s giving me 3^(n-1) where ‘n’ is the number of years we’ve been together. So first year: 3^(1-1)=1; second year 3^(2-1)=3. He’s a math wizard, what can I say? And he’s never forgotten my bday or Christmas(he does have it a bit easy there, because my bday is the 19th of Dec. )

I hope this doesn’t make you feel worse KCT, I just wanted to share that not all men forget anniversaries! I know 2 years isn’t very long in the grand scheme of things, so I’ll have to wait and see if his ability to remember these important dates stays, but I think it will.

And your’re not married yet. He’s still in the wooing stage.

 

[ChinaDad]

While I understand how nice it is for the other to remember a significant day…an anniversary is a celebration for both of you. Why not work on planning ahead…together…to make the day special for both of you?

It is not a love test, or a memory test.

… sometimes I feel we create hurdles that don’t have to be there, and attach a great deal of significance to them.

If you love one another and believe in honesty and communication…why play coy when it comes to the very day which honors your covenant with one another?

Great advice is worth repeating.

 

[Guitar]

“Happy Anniversary, Baby”

(That’s one for the Australian Little River Band fans. )

Good to read that the anniversary seemed to work out for you in the end.

Can I just add for the record that I am female and I honestly cannot tell you what date my anniversary is or how long I have been married? I have to go through a process of deduction to work out which day it was by working out which days I know it wasn’t, and then subtract the year from whatever year it is at the moment. He remembers; I don’t.