Something is not adding up here

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ThunderCrack

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Since October 2012 I’ve been praying for a woman who I’ve trying to wake up. During these past for month I have learned great deal about God, Blessed Mother, Angels, Saints, Prayers and Myself. I did things I wasn’t originally capable of doing. But I also went to a lot of B.S and many times I’ve wanted to quit. But a driving force kept pushing to continue forward. Two days ago I just finished 27 Days of Petition Prayer. The next one is the 27 Days of Thanksgiving prayer which is part of the 54 Day Miracle Rosary Novena to Our Lady. At the same time I was also doing 30 Day Novena to Saint Joseph. But I put a complete stop to everything on the 20th of this month. Reason for this is because too many things are not adding up. During my prayers and free time I kept thinking to myself where is of this leading to. Like one side was fighting other for the truth. I also knew the forces of evil were also at work here. Right there and then, I said Christ I trust you in you and I give her to you now.

It is now the second day and the storm inside me has stop and I feel peaceful. However at the same time I feel empty and the fire I had is lost. My prayers to the Lord feel like they have no weight and no power in my words. No matter how hard I try the energy just isn’t there like it once was. I don’t know what is going on and I can’t get an answer out of the Lord. Thing are not adding up here.
 
This is called spiritual dryness. It is not a temptation, rather a suffering from the Lord; meditate upon Psalm 22 and Revelation 17.

God bless.
 
That is very true as well. To better say I have a gerneral idea on what to do next.
 
I am not a expert, but a priest I know is great. His advice to me on “complicating the interior life” goes like this.

God wants unity with us. He doesn’t want us so busy trying to pray that we distance ourselves from Him. “Utter simplicity”. We can use vocal prayers (like the ones above) to begin our prayer, to sustain it at times, but we should also be moving to mental prayer…more a “family chat with our loving Father”.

I had all these people I was praying for. He smiled. He said "create a list…call it List ‘A’…under that label list all the people you’re praying for…create another list if you need it…List B…put all the other things you’re praying for…more patience, more love for Our Lady, more contrition, more service oriented attitude at work, etc. now when you pray…just tell your Father what list is your intention…“He can read it for you!!”.

Pray and ask God for inspiration on this women you mention…how can you help her, etc, how canGod use you as an instrument.
 
Your experience kind of reminds me of how I tried so very hard to receive God’s consolation. The harder I tried, the harder things seem to become. This was happening during a long retreat. Then, something “broke,” It was some realization that it was not about how much I loved God, but that God loved me. GOD LOVES ME!!! Yeheeeyy!!! (then you start going crazy, jumping up and down, feeling like superman, a manic phase, perhaps.) But kidding aside. I truly think it is important to bask in God’s love. Everything else, follows. All the best.
 
ThunderCrack said:
My prayers to the Lord feel like they have no weight and no power in my words…
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There was never any power in your words. All the power is in God’s Will. You can’t say a certain prayer a certain way for a certain time and make anything happen. If you could, you’d be God.

Maybe He just wants you to stop for a while and figure this out. I loved the part where you just gave her to Jesus. Faith and trust and the choice to give your time in prayer are important. I have this feeling any prayer you choose to say that feels empty to you, will be hugely appreciated by God. Because now you know you are a powerless petitioner, and are trusting in Him.
 
You may want to examine how your prayers inform your actions. How did your prayers for this woman involve your awareness of her responses toward you? Did your prayer help you to be more aware of yourself- your appearance, your mannerisms, etc.? It’s not enough to pray that a woman will like you. You must be aware of how to better attract her- how you dress, wearing cologne, your body language, keeping your car neat and clean. As a woman, I just find sloppines in personal appearance a turnoff. I also can’t stand a filthy car or a limp handshake. These are just some examples for me personally. The point is that our prayer must engage our realization of ourselves and others, and we must be open to change and improvement. Hope this helps. God bless.👍
 
ThunderCrack said:
Since October 2012 I’ve been praying for a woman who I’ve trying to wake up. During these past for month I have learned great deal about God, Blessed Mother, Angels, Saints, Prayers and Myself. I did things I wasn’t originally capable of doing. But I also went to a lot of B.S and many times I’ve wanted to quit. But a driving force kept pushing to continue forward. Two days ago I just finished 27 Days of Petition Prayer. The next one is the 27 Days of Thanksgiving prayer which is part of the 54 Day Miracle Rosary Novena to Our Lady. At the same time I was also doing 30 Day Novena to Saint Joseph. But I put a complete stop to everything on the 20th of this month. Reason for this is because too many things are not adding up. During my prayers and free time I kept thinking to myself where is of this leading to. Like one side was fighting other for the truth. I also knew the forces of evil were also at work here. Right there and then, I said Christ I trust you in you and I give her to you now.

It is now the second day and the storm inside me has stop and I feel peaceful. However at the same time I feel empty and the fire I had is lost. My prayers to the Lord feel like they have no weight and no power in my words. No matter how hard I try the energy just isn’t there like it once was. I don’t know what is going on and I can’t get an answer out of the Lord. Thing are not adding up here.
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Sounds to me like you just plain old burnt yourself out. That means you were trying to do much on your own. The best thing you did was turn her over to the Lord. Things do not need to be this complicated. Devotions are fine, but sometimes they can get in the way of actual praying, if you know what I mean.
 
Sometimes the answer we get may not be the answer we expect. It may not be the answer we want. You should continue to pray. I would recommend that you look for a spiritual director if you don’t have one.
 
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