Son says he's learned he can't trust anyone--including a Pope

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My wife and I have been praying for years that our son would go back to church. Praise the Lord, he has been doing so (with his new girlfriend – not us, unfortunately) for many months now.

Consequently, I thought things were going much better for him spiritually, so I was taken by surprise a couple days ago, when he said he’s learned he can’t trust anyone–including a Pope. Why a Pope? Because (according to him) Pope JPII moved around the pedophile priests.

I suggested that he read the official independent study (I don’t remember its name) instead of media reports about it. Although he acknowledged its probably a good idea, I’m not sure he will (especially when I don’t know the name!), and because it’s probably a long document.

Any recommendations?
 
Aside from what Daddy Girl said (and I would further point out even the saints made mistakes),
I’d point out the decisions of parish staffing are almost never the province of the Pope in Rome (except for priests in Rome itself of course) but of local bishops or superiors of religious orders. Usually when the Pope intervenes it has to do with doctrine; discipline is left to the Ordinaries. Or at least did until long after the worst of the scandals, when the Holy Office took particular interest in disciplinary matters relating to pedophile priests. And even then they do not transfer, only discipline.
 
What someone feel they feel and it’s hard to argue what someone is feeling I’m a law enforcement officer yet I have a distrust of police when they are riding behind me. So hopefully he can come around and continue to practice the faith he’s grown up in. I won’t stop driving because I don’t trust police no need to stop being a good catholic because of some of your concerns regarding the pope.
 
The question, of course, is this: If he will not trust the Pope, who is he going to trust? Himself? Is he going to despair of everyone? What does that mean? Let us hope it is not merely code for deciding he doesn’t have to follow moral law when he doesn’t care to, because his leaders don’t follow it perfectly.

The Church does not teach that the Pope is trustworthy in all things. The Church teaches that the Pope shall be trustworthy when teaching faith and morals. Your son does not have to trust the Pope to pay him back $20 he owes him, he doesn’t have to trust him to be a capable administrator, and he doesn’t have to trust that the Pope will never say or do anything unwise. He needs to trust what the Church teaches. If he understands that narrow range, maybe this will be easier for him.

Of course we all ought to be trustworthy. We need those around us to be trustworthy and others need us to live lives of integrity. That we sometimes fail in what integrity demands of us, however, is no reason to despair that no one else has any integrity at all. If we are going to do that, we had also better not ride in cars or airplanes or allow anyone to pay us in time or enter into a legal contract with us. If we decide to renounce the demands of moral law because religious leaders fail, what is to keep us from renouncing civil law? Are civil leaders not even worse? Shall we have anarchy because we can’t find anyone to lead us who never fails? 🤷
 
It’s heartbreaking that there is this blight on the Church that is distressing people in this way. I often contemplate with whom the blame will lie before God on judgement day and it is very tempting to target a single person or single institution. The reality is that this scourge of child sexual abuse is endemic across the spectrum. In Australia right now, a royal commission is being held into the major institutions that have protected pedophile members, not just the religions. They started with the Salvation Army and the extent of it all was shocking. I dread when they start the Catholic Churchs turn.

I try to point out to people that this scourge has infiltrated society at every point that it can. It’s been powerful and overwhelming and the Church leaders did what they genuinely thought was right at the time. Who knew the insidiousness of this disease?

There is a saying that where God builds His Church, the devil will build his chapel. It is a reminder that all of us who work towards being godly are going to be especially targeted by God’s enemies. Change has to start within each one of us. We have to work at not be be complacent about the way evil penetrates where weakness exists in godliness. It is with our personal discernment of the character of good and evil, that we are equipped to fight it.

I truly believe that pedophilia will be repelled only by the rebuilding of the family as the highest good of the community. A mother and fathers love is the best gift that a child can receive to fortify him or her against predators.

I would try and remind your son that *we are *the Church. Each person as a member of the Body of Christ has our own duty to defend and purify her, and also bear her penance. Our prayers and works are so vital and important as she is not some remote institution… we are her.
 
These are all excellent points. Thank you all very much.

I’m sad to say that some were reminders of things I knew/thought, but failed to be able to think of them quickly enough during the couple of minutes we talked. I will try to work them all into a conversation in the near future.

I purchased and read Pope Fiction by Patrick Madrid many years ago. It was very interesting and enlightening. Hopefully I still have it (I have a tendency of loaning books out, and never getting them back). I think that might help him, along with all the comments you have provided.

Does anyone know of a synopsis of the commission’s findings on the sexual abuse in the Church? Honestly, I don’t even recall the name of the full document.

While trying to find the name of that document, I just noticed that Pope Francis is setting up a new advisory commission on sexual abuse Pope Francis is setting up a new advisory commission on sexual abuse . Good to see that, but, at least for now, my son’s concern was with Pope JPII, not Pope Francis.
 
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