I’ll have to talk to my kids, as I expect I will be in a position where I’ll want to have been indulgent about it.
(My husband will only care that they’re not morose.)
For my parents’ funeral, my assignment was to identify about twice as many songs and readings as they could need, and the two sent to make arrangements with Father chose from that. (The others did not mind what was chosen, so long as they didn’t have to do the choosing.)
Whoever is making your funeral arrangments will thank you very much to be clear about what you want, particularly if you want something that avoids ostentation or excessive spending. Every decision that can be taken off of the shoulders of your family will be appreciated, provided you don’t “decide” to load them down with lots of tasks to complete with too little time. (Let them know who to notify, too…)