Specific Inerfaith Marriage Questions (all the help I can get!!!!)

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SonCatcher said:
Then you both should seriously reconsider your plans for marriage. It is more than the emotions you are dealing with right now. You are going to have to live with each other for the rest of your lives. Since you are expressing doubts about your ability to agree on how to raise your children (a MAJOR factor in marriage), there are serious concerns over whether you should marry him.

You just said above you would “never” become Catholic and now you claim to be open minded. (I assure you that your dismissal of Catholicism is based on ignorance.) Which is it?

For the record, I happen to be the product of a “mixed marriage” that had a decidedly happier start than the one you are projecting.
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I just explained WHY I would not convert to Catholicism, my father was Catholic, I’ve been to Catholic churches and I am not entirely ignorant about Catholicism (which I am twards Anglicanism)

I never said anything about an unhappy start, my fiance and I agree on almost everything when it comes to raising children… This is just a disagreement we ran across last night and I wanted some opinions along with prayer to find the best solution.
 
sunshineforever said:
well before I go out and buy 5 books on the subject tell me this, what role do saints play in Anglicanism? My BIGGEST turnoff to the Catholic faith is their view of saint, I see it as a form of idol worship (harmless or not, that is how I will always see it)
Yes, the saints were great men and women who were devout to our Lord and Savior… but that is all the are! MEN and WOMEN, people of the earth. My main concern is that I do not want my children learning that it is okay to pray to or through a mortal.
I only pray directly to the Holy Trinity.
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You will find a wide range of different beliefs in Anglicanism. Beyond the Nicean creed its generally very diverse.
 
sunshineforever said:
well before I go out and buy 5 books on the subject tell me this, what role do saints play in Anglicanism? My BIGGEST turnoff to the Catholic faith is their view of saint, I see it as a form of idol worship (harmless or not, that is how I will always see it)
Yes, the saints were great men and women who were devout to our Lord and Savior… but that is all the are! MEN and WOMEN, people of the earth. My main concern is that I do not want my children learning that it is okay to pray to or through a mortal.
I only pray directly to the Holy Trinity.
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🙂 - You should study that issue out in your own faith (non-denominational or otherwise).

My guess you don’t have an issue with asking a friend to pray for you (and the bible teaches us, in fact, that the prayers of the righteous are powerful and Paul, in scripture, asks disciples to pray for him. So “intercessory prayer” is ok:

When you read (as you should in any denomination) Revelation, you will see the saints in heaven (believers in heaven) sending up the prayers of the faithful on earth to God as “incense”. How did they get those prayers to send? They must have heard them and their sending them is an act of intercession.

Actual Catholic doctrine (we must distinguish Chruch doctrine from those who unknowingly hold personal views or practices inconsistent with Church teaching) is that we are not “praying to” Saints as we pray to God, but are praying for their “intercession” (just like in the book of Revelation) to petition God for us, pray for us - just as our friends here on earth pray for us without impacting our abililty, desire, and need, to pray directly to God.

Just some food for thought as you and your fianicee both study out faith.

Blessings in whatever you decide to do and whatever church or christian fellowship you decide to associate with.

Brian
 
While I cannot offer you much more advice than what has already been given (I am a mere college student, after all), I’ll offer some prayers for you. I was once in a relationship with a guy who was not Catholic (long story)…he wasn’t completely firm in his beliefs, but I was (and still am). So I know how hard it can be sometimes when disagreements come up. So my apologies with the lack of advice/experience.

I pray that you find the peace of Jesus in your heart with whatever path you decide!

🙂
 
Okay! I want to start out by thanking those that have given me advice, it has all be taken into consideration. However I would like to stop a few people before they begin…

I did NOT make this thread to have a religious debate, I would prefer no debating whatsoever. I created this thread because I am confused and looking for guidance from my brothers and sisters in Christ, along with help from our Father.

Please don’t turn this into any sort of “Catholic vs Protestant” debacle!

Thank you 🙂
 
sunshineforever said:
Okay! I want to start out by thanking those that have given me advice, it has all be taken into consideration. However I would like to stop a few people before they begin…

I did NOT make this thread to have a religious debate, I would prefer no debating whatsoever. I created this thread because I am confused and looking for guidance from my brothers and sisters in Christ, along with help from our Father.

Please don’t turn this into any sort of “Catholic vs Protestant” debacle!

Thank you 🙂
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Sorry - my intentions were sincere. I hope the balance of my advice from personal, similar, experience is helpful. Blessings
 
sunshineforever said:
well before I go out and buy 5 books on the subject tell me this, what role do saints play in Anglicanism? My BIGGEST turnoff to the Catholic faith is their view of saint, I see it as a form of idol worship (harmless or not, that is how I will always see it)
Yes, the saints were great men and women who were devout to our Lord and Savior… but that is all the are! MEN and WOMEN, people of the earth. My main concern is that I do not want my children learning that it is okay to pray to or through a mortal.
I only pray directly to the Holy Trinity.
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Your explanation came after my post so it was improper to rebuke me for missing it.

The Catholic Church does not require anyone to participate in any particular devotion (outside of the Sacraments). It is possible to view St Francis of Assisi in no greater regard than a Protestant would view Billy Graham. Great examples and heroes of their times. We believe those who lived extraordinary lives for Christ are in Heaven, not earth, and that their souls will be with God forever, no longer mortal.

It is expressly forbidden in the Catholic faith to give any saint (even Mary, herself) that worship that is due to God alone.
 
Here is my specific interfaith marriage advice:

Take classes to learn about the Catholic faith in full from the Church. The class is specifically designed to help people understand the Catholic faith. There is no requirement to become Catholic upon completing the course. Ask any parish near you about RCIA.

Likewise, it would be good for your fiance to learn about and understand your faith (though he should really take RCIA first, too - as he apparently hasn’t finished his formation).

Once you understand each other’s faiths, it will be possible to have constructive conversations about the raising of children.
 
Unfortunately we did get off topic, my fiance isn’t even part of the Catholic church. He calls himself a non-practicing Catholic and hasn’t been to church since his daughter’s christening, he was never even confirmed himself! Yet I still hold a strong faith in my beliefs and want my children to be raised Protestant… I’ve prayed about it and at the end of the day I will do God’s will, but before he shows me his will I wanted advice from other Protestants and Catholics
 
SonCatcher said:
Here is my specific interfaith marriage advice:

Take classes to learn about the Catholic faith in full from the Church. The class is specifically designed to help people understand the Catholic faith. There is no requirement to become Catholic upon completing the course. Ask any parish near you about RCIA.

Likewise, it would be good for your fiance to learn about and understand your faith (though he should really take RCIA first, too - as he apparently hasn’t finished his formation).

Once you understand each other’s faiths, it will be possible to have constructive conversations about the raising of children.
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👍 best idea yet! lol
 
sunshineforever said:
Unfortunately we did get off topic, my fiance isn’t even part of the Catholic church. He calls himself a non-practicing Catholic and hasn’t been to church since his daughter’s christening, he was never even confirmed himself! Yet I still hold a strong faith in my beliefs and want my children to be raised Protestant… I’ve prayed about it and at the end of the day I will do God’s will, but before he shows me his will I wanted advice from other Protestants and Catholics
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It’s also important to remember that in Ireland, the Catholic/Protestant question is largely ethnic/cultural. I once knew an Irish Protestant who was married to an Irish Catholic. They had to move to the States to find peace as their relatives didn’t accept them.
 
He lives in Limerick and told me that I WILL get harassed if I tell anyone that I am Protestant, I don’t want to hide my faith, and I don’t want to conform to his 🤷
 
well i have no idea… i’ve never been to Limerick and while I was in Ireland I never discussed religion with anyone
 
🤷
Perhaps his immediate friends and/or family are part of what in America would be called Minutemen, the anti-illegal immigration types. Just as the Minutemen see Mexican and Central Americans changing US culture perhaps they would see alien faiths as changing the local culture even if they are “cafeteria, cultural or Catholic in name only” themselves. Near the start of the thread the OP said she was warned to just say she was raised Catholic.
 
Nothing I’m reading about this man gives me a lot of trust in him. He is willing to have his fiancee lie (‘say I’m just Catholic’) rather than stand up to anybody? This along with his previous marriage and strange insistence on raising children in a Church that he does not seemingly care to frequent says there are more questions than answers here. My advice is to think long and hard about whether he is really the man for you.
 
sunshineforever said:
I don’t know much about Anglicanism however I wouldn’t completely disregard a denomination based on ignorance. I will have to research it more and see. (I am currently non-denominational, don’t see the need for a denomination, however if it meant that my children will grow up in a religiously harmonious household I would be happy with that)
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You may have a hard time convincing an Irish catholic from Ireland to convert to Anglincanism…even more difficult if he is from Northern Ireland.
 
4Squarebaby said:
🤷
Perhaps his immediate friends and/or family are part of what in America would be called Minutemen, the anti-illegal immigration types. Just as the Minutemen see Mexican and Central Americans changing US culture perhaps they would see alien faiths as changing the local culture even if they are “cafeteria, cultural or Catholic in name only” themselves. Near the start of the thread the OP said she was warned to just say she was raised Catholic.
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lol, well i doubt that he is against illegal immigration since he wants me to hop on a plane and just be there until we get married (which will be in about 3 years and i’m moving this dec.)
 
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