Spending habits

[crazydyl]

Hello All

I’m unsure about how much money I should spend on entertainment and luxury items…

Many Catholic women that I talk to waste a lot of money on a lot of things like going on holidays and big events. Is that not being a bad Catholic when people are starving to death around the world?

Haha, I’ve not ended up in a relationship with a few women because they spend too much money Am I mad? I either need to adapt to these big spenders or become a monk and spend nothing lol

What are your views on expenditure?

Dyl

 

[JRKH]

We had a huge dicussion a while back on “how much money a christian should have” and it went many pages. (If you’d like the link let me know)

My take on it is to live simply.
Buy good quality items and then take care of them.
Don’t try to keep up with “fashion”
Do not neglect the poor.

Ask yourself, If I am called before God tonight, How will I account for my use of the blessings he gave me (including money).

Hope some of this helps.

Peace
James

 

[puzzleannie]

What are your views on expenditure?

Dyl

I have views on expenditures of my own money, and of money and resources over which I have a stewardship responsibility. I don’t have views on other people’s expenses, except for people who come to me expecting to be bailed out when the overspend. They only come once because they know what my answer will be. Why is your concern not phrased as decision making about your own spending habits? Why did you feel the need to bring in “many Catholic women I know” spending too much, and who are you to say they are?

 

[jamanne]

I have views on expenditures of my own money, and of money and resources over which I have a stewardship responsibility. I don’t have views on other people’s expenses, except for people who come to me expecting to be bailed out when the overspend. They only come once because they know what my answer will be. Why is your concern not phrased as decision making about your own spending habits? Why did you feel the need to bring in “many Catholic women I know” spending too much, and who are you to say they are?

When my husband and i were young we never had a spare penny.we worked hard and did the best for our kids and extended family as the need arose.every penny was a prisoner ,as we always had to be aware of the next strike or layoff so we learned some very good money management habits .we are g/parents now and retired with good pensions and the ability to travel a little bit.with our frugal past we always feel when we go on a trip kind of guilty ,on discussing this with a pastor he explained that our trip was spending money so other people could be employed ,usually from poor countries the staff on the cruise ships and the people in the market stalls needed our money for them to have a decent life and God had allowed us to appreciate his wonderful world as a great gift.Also we met many wonderful people on these trips some of them in difficult life situations that we were able to help them with and with whom we remain friends > from Scotland Philippines ,Australia ,New Zealand ,Hawaii South Pacific Islands, England Ireland we have people from all over the world we keep in touch with .they have enriched our lives in many positive ways and they ours ,so it isn’t all about spending money its how you spend it that counts.I;m sure we have come under criticism for our trips but I don’t feel guilty anymore.The same people didn’t offer to scrape the ice of the car when my husband was going on nightshift 43" below zero on Christmas Eve for forty years or offertolook after my children so i could do an extra shift when my husband was laid off so let everyone look after their own spending habits Anne C

 

[gmarie21]

When my husband and i were young we never had a spare penny.we worked hard and did the best for our kids and extended family as the need arose.every penny was a prisoner ,as we always had to be aware of the next strike or layoff so we learned some very good money management habits .we are g/parents now and retired with good pensions and the ability to travel a little bit.with our frugal past we always feel when we go on a trip kind of guilty ,on discussing this with a pastor he explained that our trip was spending money so other people could be employed ,usually from poor countries the staff on the cruise ships and the people in the market stalls needed our money for them to have a decent life and God had allowed us to appreciate his wonderful world as a great gift.Also we met many wonderful people on these trips some of them in difficult life situations that we were able to help them with and with whom we remain friends > from Scotland Philippines ,Australia ,New Zealand ,Hawaii South Pacific Islands, England Ireland we have people from all over the world we keep in touch with .they have enriched our lives in many positive ways and they ours ,so it isn’t all about spending money its how you spend it that counts.I;m sure we have come under criticism for our trips but I don’t feel guilty anymore.The same people didn’t offer to scrape the ice of the car when my husband was going on nightshift 43" below zero on Christmas Eve for forty years or offertolook after my children so i could do an extra shift when my husband was laid off so let everyone look after their own spending habits Anne C

I agree with your pastor. We don’t have a lot but if we go out to eat every once-in-a-while, we usually go to a hole in the wall Mexican place and tip at least 20% knowing that our server doesn’t have a lot, has to work to feed her family, and that she works hard for what she has, same with all the employees there, hence why we visit that establishment. We also live near a college town with kids working their way through school, so we’ll go there sometimes and tip well because we know they are struggling, that’s also where we do a lot of our shopping. Granted, our bill total at any of the places is small (usually around $22 max), so even a 20 - 25% tip may not be much, but it’s something.

 

[Em_in_FL]

I agree with the previous posters… you really need to look at where your money is going when you spend it also! There are many people around the world that would be even poorer if those who were more fortunate were not there to purchase the items or use the services that they are providing.
Hoarding money can also become a problem for some people… at some point things have to balance out.

Put prayer into how YOU choose to use the gift of your finances - don’t judge the appearance of others on the outside…

 

[gardenswithkids]

I…Why is your concern not phrased as decision making about your own spending habits? Why did you feel the need to bring in “many Catholic women I know” spending too much, and who are you to say they are?

My guess is the op is looking for a wife and his concern is more about the spending habits of his future wife than Catholic women in general. The spending habits of a wife affects her husband and vice versa.

My husband and I are both generally frugal, but when we splurge, we like to splurge on entirely different things. Our biggest expense (besides our home), is our children’s education. I attended Catholic schools through high school, and my preference for private education has cost our family a fair amount of money. My husband attended public schools. He doesn’t think private schools or homeschooling is neccessary, but he indulges us. I

In a somewhat similar way, there are things my husband wants to provide our family, that I don’t think are neccesary. If it was up to me, we’d probably still be typing on an old typewriter, talking on a phone attached by a cord to the wall, and watching tv on a 12 inch screen with bad reception.

I enjoy shopping, but a particular kind of shopping. Grocery shopping doesn’t count; electronics or sports equiptment shopping counts as torture. My husband* claims* to hate shopping, but he forgets that looking at electronics and sporting equiptment counts as shopping.

The op may not look at the way he spends his money and think he splurges on anything. I’d be willing to bet that if he had a wife, she’d find something he spends money on that she thinks is unneccesary.

 

[gmarie21]

Grocery shopping doesn’t count

Okay, maybe it’s me, but I LOVE grocery shopping (it’s the only shopping I don’t find torturous (though about once per year I dream of splurging at other types of stores). If you talked to my husband he would say that the only other shopping I’d enjoy besides grocery shopping would be for a freezer (so I could buy more meat and frozen fruits and veggies ).

 

[LotusCarsLtd]

For me I’m a believer in the concept of saving money. From an economic perspective those nations with high rates of saving have a higher GDP and I would assume this extends to people also. Save money when and where you can!

The same also goes for material possessions. If there’s something you want first judge if you truly want it. And when you’re ready save-up for it. This is how I bought my instrument.

 

[crazydyl]

Haha when Jesus said to the rich man that we should give our money away he didn’t say give it away by spending it! That’s just so stupid. God would have said to the guy to buy 20 camels so that we can ride around and do our work because they are faster than donkeys I think that Jesus would have known about economics and taken all of this into account before making his statement

I like LotusCarsLtd’s opinion, because we shouldn’t over indulge in things with people starving to death and stuff I don’t see how buying a TV would help people starving to death in Congo Be really cool watching the big TV anyway

The basic point of that surely means that we need nothing, so don’t go on holiday and don’t buy these stupid non-neccessary items. All we need is God so if we have spare change that we don’t need then give it to those starving to death.

Am I right? Or am I wrong? Would you be willing to say to the guy from Congo that is about to die, ‘sorry, I want to go on vocation’?

Just send the money directly to that guy instead of making up excuses for you own selfish greed.

 

[gardenswithkids]

…The basic point of that surely means that we need nothing, so don’t go on holiday and don’t buy these stupid non-neccessary items. All we need is God so if we have spare change that we don’t need then give it to those starving to death.

Am I right? Or am I wrong? Would you be willing to say to the guy from Congo that is about to die, ‘sorry, I want to go on vocation’?

Just send the money directly to that guy instead of making up excuses for you own selfish greed.

Instead of complaining about other people’s holidays and various spending habits, perhaps you could sell your computer and give that money to the poor. (If it isn’t your personal computer that you use to type your posts, you might better appreciate those who share what they have with others even if they haven’t completely given everything away to the poor.

Jesus invited a very specific rich man to sell his possessions, give the money to the poor and follow Him. Jesus didn’t tell every rich person He encountered to give everything away. Jesus also said something about removing the plank from one’s own eye first before pointing out the speck in another’s.

Those with children feed the hungry and clothe the naked when we feed and clothe our children. People with families typically spend most of our money on our families.

If you feel called to live the life of a monk, go right ahead. There is great sanctity to be gained by adopting voluntary poverty. St. Francis of Assissi loved his “Lady Poverty”. But Jesus doesn’t call everyone to do that.

 

[financemom]

We’re called to give in secret, and not use our charitable donations as a way to brag…so you wouldn’t necessarily know how much each was giving to causes about which they care.

How do you know these women aren’t giving up tons of money and going on vacation?

I don’t think I’m sinning by preferring the Hilton to the Holiday Inn when I summer. And as long as I have the money I plan to summer. I don’t think being a good Catholic means skipping out on the beach house each year.

How I spend my money whether through donations, traveling, or clothes is my & my husband’s business and no one else’s. I don’t often go around saying “I donated $XX to Junior League! I donated $XX to the Church!”

 

[JRKH]

Haha when Jesus said to the rich man that we should give our money away he didn’t say give it away by spending it! That’s just so stupid. God would have said to the guy to buy 20 camels so that we can ride around and do our work because they are faster than donkeys I think that Jesus would have known about economics and taken all of this into account before making his statement

What Jesus actually said was,
“If you would be perfect, go, sell what you possess and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me.” (Mt 19:21)

Of course Mark and Luke render it slightly differently,

“One thing you still lack. Sell all that you have and distribute to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me.” (Luke 18:22)

So what the Rich young man lacks is “Perfection”. Christ never said that none could be saved who had money, in fact he made a point of clarifaction on that a little later.
It is not the money, but the Love of money, the attachment to the money that is the problem.

I like LotusCarsLtd’s opinion, because we shouldn’t over indulge in things with people starving to death and stuff I don’t see how buying a TV would help people starving to death in Congo Be really cool watching the big TV anyway

The basic point of that surely means that we need nothing, so don’t go on holiday and don’t buy these stupid non-neccessary items. All we need is God so if we have spare change that we don’t need then give it to those starving to death.

Am I right? Or am I wrong? Would you be willing to say to the guy from Congo that is about to die, ‘sorry, I want to go on vocation’?

Just send the money directly to that guy instead of making up excuses for you own selfish greed.

The basic point is that we should not be attached to the things of the world. Nor should we look at wealth, or lack thereof, as either blessing or punishment from God.
Christ encouraged this young man to step outside his comfort zone, to do more, to become “perfected” in Love. A call that God gives to us all.

However, we are each called to a different station in life. These stations require different kinds of stewrdship. The monk or nun has one type of vocation, the family man and woman have a different type of vocation. If each is built upon God’s Love and upon the idea of doing everything for the Glory of God, then, if God asked them to “give it all away” they would not go away, like the young rich man, "*sorrowful; for he had great possessions. *(Mt 19:22)

If you feel this call to give all away and take on the monks cowl, then answer that call with joy and blessings. It may well be that you are also called to the Congo for missionary work.
If you simply feel the call to live a very simple life in the world, that too can be a good and serious vocation. However, it may mean that you will need to live such a life as a single man for marriage and family requires certain compromises and the ability to think clearly with “two minds” (yours and your spouse) such that the combination becomes “one mind” (not yours - not hers - but a melding of the two in Christ).

May God bless you in your vocation.

Peace
James

 

[crazydyl]

WHATEVER!

We are just going to have to agree to disagree, because I wouldn’t spend money that I didn’t need until everyone had the essentials. If I get to Heaven everyone will be alright so I could party on hehe

I just feel it in my heart that I’d rather give the money to someone who is starving to death than buy something that I don’t need. I don’t see how you can go on holidays that are not needed when other people need that money. I personally try to do a lot of good and this is what my life is based around, but I guess that I’m just more passionate than most I seem to have more of a developing-country heart rather than a developed-country heart haha I am only staying in this wealthy country so that I can feed the poor, because I’d just be in the same situation as them if I relocated in Congo

And referring to the computer question… I need it to study my masters degree so I can make a lot more money of which I can give away once my future family has a secure future

Oh, I’m also not called to be single because I could have been a catholic priest or a catholic husband, both of which are in short supply

Just whatever… I’d just rather help someone out than go on holiday… I think that it’s sick but whatever. And you say about my eye having wood in it lol I am a pretyy good Catholic now. I just do my best and that’s all that God can ask for, is going on holiday doing your best? Nooooooooooooooooooooooooo You’re actually planning, in advance, to not be the best person that you can be. Meh, maybe it’s just me and my lion heart.

 

[JRKH]

Perhaps you’d like to puruse this other thread for awhile. You see this has been quite thoroughly discussed not that long ago.

How much money Should a Christian Have?

Peace
James

 

[puzzleannie]

WHATEVER!

We are just going to have to agree to disagree, because I wouldn’t spend money that I didn’t need until everyone had the essentials. If I get to Heaven everyone will be alright so I could party on hehe

I just feel it in my heart that I’d rather give the money to someone who is starving to death than buy something that I don’t need. I .

No one here has disagreed with your discernment of how to live your own life with regard to your own money and possessions. In fact most have commended and encouraged you in your chosen path. We have disagreed with your manner of expression which since you directly judge and attack the opinions and outward behavior of a few other people of your aquaintance seems harsh and judgemental. some of us are suggesting that the merit in following the narrow path may be tarnished if it is accompanied by an attitude of condemnation and judgement of others.

 

[Cat]

I think it’s possible that the OPs question will be answered by the U.S. government.

Plans to pay for the new health care program and many other newly-established federal programs call for a marked increase in taxes on the wealthy (>$250,000/year). I am guessing that the tax will also be extended to those of us who are not making that much, but who are pulling in good incomes (>$50,000/year).

So if that Master’s Degree pays off and the OP is offered a high-paying job, he/she will end up giving away more than half of their income to help those who are less financially-blessed. The choice as to who or what will receive his/her money will no longer be his/hers, but will rest with the federal government.

Not much we can do about it other than vote our preference when we have the opportunity.

We need to always keep in mind that all that we have belongs to the Lord. The Church makes suggestions (through our local diocese and parishes) what is an appropriate amount for us to give back to His work and how much we can keep for ourselves. I say we should follow those guidelines unless the Holy Spirit leads us to give more. It is commendable to give away money to help others, but it is not necessary to leave families bereft.

I would suggest that the OP will find that once he/she has earned that Master’s Degree and is pulling in the large income, that the large income will not stretch nearly as far as he/she thinks it will. It’s amazing how a fairly good income can dwindle so quickly paying for just the living expenses in the United States. It’s often difficult to make ends meet, let alone pay for luxuries and extras. One health crisis, even with insurance, can still wipe out a family’s spending income in a few months. A big repair bill (e.g., a roof) can totally decimate family savings and put a family into serious debt. It is not easy for a family to give away money, especially when there are children in the family. I think a lot of families in the U.S. find other ways to help the poor; e.g., through volunteering in their community. And I think that in the United States, a wise Christian will save money if possible because of our unstable financial situation, otherwise we will become poor ourselves and require assistance from others.

 

[gardenswithkids]

No one here has disagreed with your discernment of how to live your own life with regard to your own money and possessions. In fact most have commended and encouraged you in your chosen path. We have disagreed with your manner of expression which since you directly judge and attack the opinions and outward behavior of a few other people of your aquaintance seems harsh and judgemental. some of us are suggesting that the merit in following the narrow path may be tarnished if it is accompanied by an attitude of condemnation and judgement of others.

Nicely put. I wouldn’t have been so nice. Here’s a little sampling of my thoughts about what he said:

I disagree with the op that his pursuit of a master’s education ($$$$ whether paid for by him, his parents and/or in part by the taxpayers $$$$) constitutes something that he “needs.” Not that I have any problem with people spending money on education–as I mentioned in my earlier post that’s where my family spends a great deal of our money. Yet he seems to think* his* choice is noble because he plans to give away his “extra” money in the future to the poor, while those who may contribute far more to the poor than he ever has (and may ever will), he condemns. How* dare* they spend some of their money in a way different that he’d spend their money.

 

[StJudePray4Me]

So do you think the CC should sell all possessions, like art work, and use it to feed the hungry? DO you think all Bishops and Priests should take a vow of poverty and donate their salaries to the poor? Should they never take a vacation trip? Is that selfish? Our Pastor owns a beach house. Is he a bad priest, and a bad Catholic? After all, he doesn’t NEED it, he can live at the rectory.

 

[financemom]

WHATEVER!

We are just going to have to agree to disagree, because I wouldn’t spend money that I didn’t need until everyone had the essentials. If I get to Heaven everyone will be alright so I could party on hehe

I just feel it in my heart that I’d rather give the money to someone who is starving to death than buy something that I don’t need. I don’t see how you can go on holidays that are not needed when other people need that money. I personally try to do a lot of good and this is what my life is based around, but I guess that I’m just more passionate than most I seem to have more of a developing-country heart rather than a developed-country heart haha I am only staying in this wealthy country so that I can feed the poor, because I’d just be in the same situation as them if I relocated in Congo

And referring to the computer question… I need it to study my masters degree so I can make a lot more money of which I can give away once my future family has a secure future

Oh, I’m also not called to be single because I could have been a catholic priest or a catholic husband, both of which are in short supply

Just whatever… I’d just rather help someone out than go on holiday… I think that it’s sick but whatever. And you say about my eye having wood in it lol I am a pretyy good Catholic now. I just do my best and that’s all that God can ask for, is going on holiday doing your best? Nooooooooooooooooooooooooo You’re actually planning, in advance, to not be the best person that you can be. Meh, maybe it’s just me and my lion heart.

I’m still waiting to “make a lot more money” with my master’s degree. I don’t know what you are getting yours in, but mine is in Finance and because of the state of the economy my degree is worth less than half what it was when I got my masters two years ago.

I can’t decide if I’m offended by your comments or find them laughable about how you say you are a good Catholic then throw around judgments like you are.