Spinoff thread: Large Families and One Bag Minimalism

[jmjZelie]

So this past year our family has sold or donated or given to friends or thrown away 75% of our stuff. We have settled on a minimal wardrobe and bare essentials kitchen. Now we are working toward one-bag minimalism, where each person has one piece of luggage for personal belongings: books, clothes, and toys. They will also each have one backpack for all their homeschool materials. I will follow suit with one teacher’s bag. Although I will keep a couple banker’s boxes of curriculum to use with subsequent children, especially religion and science and social studies. We are more than halfway to this point already.

Now, my husband comes from a wealthy family, so toys are a real problem. We still have some massive toy sets from years ago (Legos, Playmobil castles, Lincoln Logs, Thomas trains, etc) and we need to figure out what to keep and what to donate or give to friends.

So, my question is, imagine you were going to be nomadic and live a one-bag lifestyle. What would be important for you to keep in your bag? And what kind of toys would you consent to lugging around for your kids, especially if you have a wide range of kids. What would you be willing to let go of easily, with no regrets?

P.S. I think I should mention that this lifestyle choice is not an end in itself for us, but is a means to a greater end.

 

[pensmama87]

I really like construction toys, but I’d probably lean toward just having 1 or 2 kinds.

One big difficulty with toys, at least it would be for us, is that apart from a few special items, in our home, toys really belong to the family, not to individuals. I could see that being a snag in the idea of everybody having a bag.

 

[lax16]

So this past year our family has sold or donated or given to friends or thrown away 75% of our stuff. We have settled on a minimal wardrobe and bare essentials kitchen. Now we are working toward one-bag minimalism, where each person has one piece of luggage for personal belongings: books, clothes, and toys. They will also each have one backpack for all their homeschool materials. I will follow suit with one teacher’s bag. Although I will keep a couple banker’s boxes of curriculum to use with subsequent children, especially religion and science and social studies. We are more than halfway to this point already.

Now, my husband comes from a wealthy family, so toys are a real problem. We still have some massive toy sets from years ago (Legos, Playmobil castles, Lincoln Logs, Thomas trains, etc) and we need to figure out what to keep and what to donate or give to friends.

So, my question is, imagine you were going to be nomadic and live a one-bag lifestyle. What would be important for you to keep in your bag? And what kind of toys would you consent to lugging around for your kids, especially if you have a wide range of kids. What would you be willing to let go of easily, with no regrets?

P.S. I think I should mention that this lifestyle choice is not an end in itself for us, but is a means to a greater end.

I have kept classic toys that are not replaceable. Thomas the Tank Engine trains used to be made of wood and so I kept these. I have kept precious, little dolls that are no longer available (Strawberry Shortcake has now taken on a more grown up look).

I am not quick to give away well-made items because toys and clothing are not made the way they used to be.

I have a plastic bin for each child to store their mementos as well.

I have decided to hold on to the “old school” stuff because I want to pass it on to my grandkids someday (God willing).

For give-aways? Anything junky and replaceable.

 

[jmjZelie]

I really like construction toys, but I’d probably lean toward just having 1 or 2 kinds.

One big difficulty with toys, at least it would be for us, is that apart from a few special items, in our home, toys really belong to the family, not to individuals. I could see that being a snag in the idea of everybody having a bag.

I was thinking of keeping communal toys separate and only special toys that really belong to one person in their personal belongings category.

But even so, we need to figure out what to keep and what to let go. We have way too many communal toy sets. Ideally, I would like one small bucket of a building set and one small bucket of baby/toddler toys.

 

[UbiCaritas]

I was thinking of keeping communal toys separate and only special toys that really belong to one person in their personal belongings category.

But even so, we need to figure out what to keep and what to let go. We have way too many communal toy sets. Ideally, I would like one small bucket of a building set and one small bucket of baby/toddler toys.

In my decidedly more-limited-than-yours experience, something I’ve found helpful with DD’s toys is a) sorting through them every six months or so, and pulling out those that aren’t played with anymore to go into the “baby toy” bin, and b) keeping 2 small fabric bins of toys in the living room, where she plays most often. She gets one of those out per day, and I rotate them, which keeps them newer and more interesting but also cuts down on the possible mess.

 

[Xantippe]

I really like construction toys, but I’d probably lean toward just having 1 or 2 kinds.

One big difficulty with toys, at least it would be for us, is that apart from a few special items, in our home, toys really belong to the family, not to individuals. I could see that being a snag in the idea of everybody having a bag.

Yes and yes.

If you’ve got LEGOs and blocks, you don’t really need other construction stuff.

There’s also the question of the child’s archive. Do they get additional storage for storing special projects and art work? In our family, the big kids do, but it’s limited to one drawer or box that is regularly curated.

The kids also photograph their projects and we include some of the photos in our yearly family photobook.

Also, there’s the issue of board games. Those can be quite bulky but can have a lot of play value.

I would be concerned about going too minimalistic because the tendency today is for kids to be drawn to electronic entertainment in the absence of IRL stuff. And one negative experience that I had with my kids when I was on a neatness drive was that the kids stopped playing with their toys to avoid having to pick them up! I told the story to my oldest’s psychologist and she said the same thing had happened to her with her kids.

 

[jmjZelie]

I am thinking about getting rid of most of the Thomas trains and keeping the Amish-made Lincoln Logs. And getting rid of the Playmobil castles, but keeping the figures and letting the kids play with the figures and the Legos. Hmmm, that may still be excessive.

I have been incredibly impressed by the participation and eagerness of my kids, though. They are more focused and emotionally prepared for this next level than I am. They are an inspiration.

 

[Xantippe]

I was thinking of keeping communal toys separate and only special toys that really belong to one person in their personal belongings category.

But even so, we need to figure out what to keep and what to let go. We have way too many communal toy sets. Ideally, I would like one small bucket of a building set and one small bucket of baby/toddler toys.

What’s your goal here?

The approach you’re describing sounds a little stark and institutional for a growing homeschooling family.

Maybe as a compromise you could lend out some of your stuff? If it comes back to you, fine, if it doesn’t, that’s fine too.

Edited to add: That’s what we did during our big between-kid gap–we lent out a large number of baby and toddler items to our grad family community.)

 

[UbiCaritas]

I am thinking about getting rid of most of the Thomas trains and keeping the Amish-made Lincoln Logs. And getting rid of the Playmobil castles, but keeping the figures and letting the kids play with the figures and the Legos. Hmmm, that may still be excessive.

I have been incredibly impressed by the participation and eagerness of my kids, though. They are more focused and emotionally prepared for this next level than I am. They are an inspiration.

Would it be possible to put some of it in storage for a bit, and then either sell/give it away or retain some of it in 3-6 months, depending on how that goes? That way, you can evaluate “hmmm, Mr. 4-year-old really needs more creative building-type play, guess I should haul out the Thomas set” or, alternately, “the kids seem to prefer building their own castles with blocks and the like, and no one has particularly missed the castles, so time to bring them to the nearest kids’ resale shop.”

 

[Xantippe]

Would it be possible to put some of it in storage for a bit, and then either sell/give it away or retain some of it in 3-6 months, depending on how that goes? That way, you can evaluate “hmmm, Mr. 4-year-old really needs more creative building-type play, guess I should haul out the Thomas set” or, alternately, “the kids seem to prefer building their own castles with blocks and the like, and no one has particularly missed the castles, so time to bring them to the nearest kids’ resale shop.”

Right. I would definitely suggest a probationary zone before you get rid of too many things permanently.

I’d especially suggest caution with expensive items like the Thomas stuff.

 

[jmjZelie]

Yes and yes.

If you’ve got LEGOs and blocks, you don’t really need other construction stuff.

There’s also the question of the child’s archive. Do they get additional storage for storing special projects and art work? In our family, the big kids do, but it’s limited to one drawer or box that is regularly curated.

The kids also photograph their projects and we include some of the photos in our yearly family photobook.

Also, there’s the issue of board games. Those can be quite bulky but can have a lot of play value.

I would be concerned about going too minimalistic because the tendency today is for kids to be drawn to electronic entertainment in the absence of IRL stuff. And one negative experience that I had with my kids when I was on a neatness drive was that the kids stopped playing with their toys to avoid having to pick them up! I told the story to my oldest’s psychologist and she said the same thing had happened to her with her kids.

We are going to reduce our board games to those that actually get played with, and after we make room on our bookshelf, we will bring them out so that we remember to play with them.

My kids had the same problem of being afraid to play with toys after cleanup, which is precisely what has spurred us on to minimize. When they have smaller sets, they know cleanup takes two minutes, and then they don’t feel bad about making a bit of a mess to play. It won’t take two hours to clean up a smaller mess.

We have memorabilia buckets that slide under the bed and they get to decide what goes in there. They can edit it whenever they want and it is totally up to them. The buckets are way too huge, though, so the next time there is a sale on buckets we will probably want to downsize. Better to have a smaller box to encourage collecting and playing with treasures than s huge, daunting and empty box that they never touch.

 

[1ke]

What’s your goal here?

Yes, this is my question too.

 

[jmjZelie]

Would it be possible to put some of it in storage for a bit, and then either sell/give it away or retain some of it in 3-6 months, depending on how that goes? That way, you can evaluate “hmmm, Mr. 4-year-old really needs more creative building-type play, guess I should haul out the Thomas set” or, alternately, “the kids seem to prefer building their own castles with blocks and the like, and no one has particularly missed the castles, so time to bring them to the nearest kids’ resale shop.”

Yes. That is what we have done. Now we are at the stage where we are pulling the stuff out and making the final decisions to keep or donate. They were in storage for 6 months.

 

[pensmama87]

In my decidedly more-limited-than-yours experience, something I’ve found helpful with DD’s toys is a) sorting through them every six months or so, and pulling out those that aren’t played with anymore to go into the “baby toy” bin, and b) keeping 2 small fabric bins of toys in the living room, where she plays most often. She gets one of those out per day, and I rotate them, which keeps them newer and more interesting but also cuts down on the possible mess.

This is similar to what we do. I suppose I am not a minimalist, but I am committed to only keeping things that are used (or likely to be used in the near future), well-made, and fit in the allotted storage space when all put away. Since I do childcare I’m willing to hold onto a bit more than I otherwise would. I do cubby storage with bins, and my rule is each child can have out one bin at a time. Sometimes they go through a Duplo phase, sometimes Brio, or their play kitchen.

A month or so ago I went through toys and donated similar items. I filled a large trash bag. What’s funny is that I think I have yet to actually ever buy my sons a toy.

 

[Xantippe]

A month or so ago I went through toys and donated similar items. I filled a large trash bag. What’s funny is that I think I have yet to actually ever buy my sons a toy.

Funny!

During a purge several years ago, I discovered that we had four different farm sets, only one of which I had purchased.

 

[jmjZelie]

What’s your goal here?

The approach you’re describing sounds a little stark and institutional for a growing homeschooling family.

Maybe as a compromise you could lend out some of your stuff? If it comes back to you, fine, if it doesn’t, that’s fine too.

Edited to add: That’s what we did during our big between-kid gap–we lent out a large number of baby and toddler items to our grad family community.)

We are 7 people living in 1200sqft. Even after giving up 75% of our belongings this year (and moving thousands of miles, and cutting our home size in half) we still have too much. We want to maintain a simple, and extremely mobile, lifestyle.

 

[Jeanne_S]

We are 7 people living in 1200sqft. Even after giving up 75% of our belongings this year (and moving thousands of miles, and cutting our home size in half) we still have too much. We want to maintain a simple, and extremely mobile, lifestyle.

Wow,please keep us updated on your progress.My youngest daughter,SIL live in a 1300 sq ft home with one toddler and another on the way in a month.Also a med/large dog.They also struggle with keeping clutter down to a minimum

 

[gardenswithkids]

We are 7 people living in 1200sqft. Even after giving up 75% of our belongings this year (and moving thousands of miles, and cutting our home size in half) we still have too much. We want to maintain a simple, and extremely mobile, lifestyle.

Wow is right!

What I’d keep or give away would depend on factors like weather, access to libraries, parks and children’s museums, size of yard and garage,(if there is a yard and garage), ability to replace items if we later needed something I gave away, etc.

My children would need different things in their suitcases, depending on the season. Snow gear takes a lot of room.

 

[pianistclare]

I guess I’m the odd person out.
As an artist and musician, I find the lack of toys and creative stimulation (building blocks and such) to be really sad and depressing. Kids need a creative outlet.
This requires “stuff”.
Children are small for such a small amount of time. I encouraged my children in creativity. They played store, Mass, and all kinds of things, but the “stuff” that others saw as clutter was fodder for their creative minds and activities. We had a blast. Now that they are grown I have a few very sentimental items. I’m purging all the time…but this thread makes me sad. I tend to look at the world through the lens of a child…( I guess because I work with children all the time).

 

[jmjZelie]

Wow,please keep us updated on your progress.My youngest daughter,SIL live in a 1300 sq ft home with one toddler and another on the way in a month.Also a med/large dog.They also struggle with keeping clutter down to a minimum

This year has certainly been an interesting one. We are learning to be more self-disciplined and to live more simply. We want to avoid austerity or a sense of enforced deprivation, and instead learn to use our creativity and our sense of adventure in life. It also helps to maintain perspective. Even the smallest and simplest home in a North American city still has running water, sewage and trash service, electricity, private bath suites (oftentimes 2 or 3!), heating/cooling, and on and on. We know we are already abundantly materially blessed. So our family focus upon minimalism helps us to maintain some level of solidarity with peoples in other parts of the world (as well as contribute to charities that support their wellbeing…insert plug for Food for the Poor here), it helps us to focus upon our personal priorities (getting out and doing things instead of being stuck at home taking care of things), and it helps us to be incredibly mobile, which we have found to be vital to our happiness and financial security.
I know that this lifestyle isn’t for everyone. Even our extended family thinks we are kinda crazy. But it works for us so muc we are doubling down on the lifestyle, in order to avoid “things creep”, where things start taking over our home and our lives again, threatening to drown us. Living thousands of miles away from family might mean it would takes weeks before anyone discovered that we had drowned in the stuff in our home!