Spiritual dry spell

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I have been increasing my daily reading of the bible quite a bit as of late (last 4 months). I find myself mowing through book after book of the NT. A TON of great insights and things along the way and more areas to explore and re-read. However, I am in constant pain leading up to my wedding day here soon ( It seems so many challenges have reared-up since we have been planning this wonderfull event in our lives) due to a herniated disc in my back. I recently read a passage that stated “seek and you shall find, Knock and the doors will be opened, ask and it shall be given”. So I took action and reasearched my condition online (knocking on the door so to speak). I have since been exploring/researching threapies to hopefully avoid surgery and heal my condition or at least find a suitable surgical option. My technical knowledge about the anatomy of the spine has increased to (seriously) the level of my physician, but recently my options were clarified for me by my team of doctors and they all are telling me I must have surgery and that therapy of another kind either isnt going to work, or in the case of some advanced therapies are years away from reality. I am distraught and dont understand why these doors havent opened. How can I understand what to do with this pain? and how can I understand gods plan? How can I get god to draw near to me and communicate through the holy spirit in my heart in order to guide me through this time? I honestly feel as though my “cup of suffering” is too much for me to bear and all sorts of thoughts of god punishing me for past sins and things like that are making me feel lost and distanced from god. I have faith god exists, I have faith Jesus is my savior and that he died for me. But I dont feel god close to me and want to take action in order for that to change. I have repented and confessed my sins. I am humble and simply seeking to realize gods plan here - please help
 
MIKEHARE1 said:
I have been increasing my daily reading of the bible quite a bit as of late (last 4 months). I find myself mowing through book after book of the NT. A TON of great insights and things along the way and more areas to explore and re-read. However, I am in constant pain leading up to my wedding day here soon ( It seems so many challenges have reared-up since we have been planning this wonderfull event in our lives) due to a herniated disc in my back. I recently read a passage that stated “seek and you shall find, Knock and the doors will be opened, ask and it shall be given”. So I took action and reasearched my condition online (knocking on the door so to speak). I have since been exploring/researching threapies to hopefully avoid surgery and heal my condition or at least find a suitable surgical option. My technical knowledge about the anatomy of the spine has increased to (seriously) the level of my physician, but recently my options were clarified for me by my team of doctors and they all are telling me I must have surgery and that therapy of another kind either isnt going to work, or in the case of some advanced therapies are years away from reality. I am distraught and dont understand why these doors havent opened. How can I understand what to do with this pain? and how can I understand gods plan? How can I get god to draw near to me and communicate through the holy spirit in my heart in order to guide me through this time? I honestly feel as though my “cup of suffering” is too much for me to bear and all sorts of thoughts of god punishing me for past sins and things like that are making me feel lost and distanced from god. I have faith god exists, I have faith Jesus is my savior and that he died for me. But I dont feel god close to me and want to take action in order for that to change. I have repented and confessed my sins. I am humble and simply seeking to realize gods plan here - please help
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First off, God is not punishing you for your sins, be clear on this.

Second, trust in God, his ways are not our own. Surgery may be His answer.

I’ll Pray for You

Jim
 
MIKEHARE1 said:
I have been increasing my daily reading of the bible quite a bit as of late (last 4 months). I find myself mowing through book after book of the NT. A TON of great insights and things along the way and more areas to explore and re-read. However, I am in constant pain leading up to my wedding day here soon ( It seems so many challenges have reared-up since we have been planning this wonderfull event in our lives) due to a herniated disc in my back. I recently read a passage that stated “seek and you shall find, Knock and the doors will be opened, ask and it shall be given”. So I took action and reasearched my condition online (knocking on the door so to speak). I have since been exploring/researching threapies to hopefully avoid surgery and heal my condition or at least find a suitable surgical option. My technical knowledge about the anatomy of the spine has increased to (seriously) the level of my physician, but recently my options were clarified for me by my team of doctors and they all are telling me I must have surgery and that therapy of another kind either isnt going to work, or in the case of some advanced therapies are years away from reality. I am distraught and dont understand why these doors havent opened. How can I understand what to do with this pain? and how can I understand gods plan? How can I get god to draw near to me and communicate through the holy spirit in my heart in order to guide me through this time? I honestly feel as though my “cup of suffering” is too much for me to bear and all sorts of thoughts of god punishing me for past sins and things like that are making me feel lost and distanced from god. I have faith god exists, I have faith Jesus is my savior and that he died for me. But I dont feel god close to me and want to take action in order for that to change. I have repented and confessed my sins. I am humble and simply seeking to realize gods plan here - please help
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I am not trying to lessen the pain of what you are going through and I do not think that’s the answer. I think the answer is in how your pain is used. Reading through the lives of the great saints they saw tremendous value in their pain and suffering and Jesus often gave them insight that ithe suffering they were experiencing was helping others by “bringing down graces” on them.

The key is they had to offer it to Christ on behalf of whatever their intention was. So essentially they become a conduet for Jesus to distribute graces. Reading in Faustina’s diary once when she was suffering tremendously and experiencing a very dark night of the soul her superior stated that she must be very loved by God as he was desiring to draw closer to her. I hope this helps somewhat brother 🙂
 
MIKEHARE1 said:
How can I understand what to do with this pain?
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What to do with pain? Do what is humanly/medically possible to alleviate it. But while the pain is still with you, unite your sufferings to those of Jesus on Calvary, especially when you attend Mass.

Bishop Fulton Sheen once said that “there is nothing more tragic in all the world than wasted pain.” (See more of what he said about this at catholicprimer.org/worship/sheen_calvary_mass_consecration.htm .) Every ounce of our pain should be offered for the redemption of Christ’s mystical body, the Church. This is what Saint Paul did: “Now I rejoice in my sufferings for your sake, and in my flesh I complete what is lacking in Christ’s afflictions for the sake of his body, that is, the church.” (Colossians 1:24)

This is not easy, but it should make your suffering more bearable, and even more important, it will make your suffering redemptive.

God bless you.
 
WOW, I am humbled at all of your thoughtfull and tremendously helpfull replies. I am moved by the love here. I will begin to offer my pain up and will educate myself on the teachings on this matter in order to fully understand it.
However one thing struck me, in a previous reply one member said “god is definitley not punishing you for your past sins”
How can you be sure? Why do you say this? What else can you share with me on this…
Thank you all for the prayers and especially for the links and other resources.
 
MIKEHARE1 said:
WOW, I am humbled at all of your thoughtfull and tremendously helpfull replies. I am moved by the love here. I will begin to offer my pain up and will educate myself on the teachings on this matter in order to fully understand it.
However one thing struck me, in a previous reply one member said “god is definitley not punishing you for your past sins”
How can you be sure? Why do you say this? What else can you share with me on this…
Thank you all for the prayers and especially for the links and other resources.
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In confession your sins are COMPLETELY forgiven if you have made an honest contrite confession and held nothing back. The devil is the one accuses of of our past sins that God forgave and hence he is called in scripture the accuser (Zechariah Chapter 3).
We see in this passage Joshua the high priest standing before the angel of the Lord and satan at his right hand “to accuse hum”.

The angel of the Lord rebukes satan and says, “IS NOT THIS MAN A BRAND SNATCHED FROM THE FIRE?” And then the most beautiful thing happens in verse (3) the angel of the Lord instructs Joshua to remove his filthy garments and put on festive garments (some translations say white garments) and then the angel of the Lord says, " See, I have taken away his guilt".

Know brother that if you are feeling accused and weighed down by sins you know you confessed it’s of the devil, call on the Blessed Virgin and let her take care of the accuser. Let virtue be the gauge by which you measure where you’re at with God, the beatitudes, the ten commandments and this way you’ll grow in holiness.
 
MIKEHARE1 said:
However one thing struck me, in a previous reply one member said “god is definitley not punishing you for your past sins”
How can you be sure? Why do you say this? What else can you share with me on this…
Click to expand...
Christ was sinless, but suffered greatly. Offer your suffering up for the sins of others. God will reward you. You have been given an opportunity, sieze it!
 
Thanks again, I have explored…offerd it up… and resolved to use grace prayer and patience to break through my “plateau”. Thanks for all of your love and patient advice … it really helped. I am new to the church and was not raised catholic so these insights are immensley helpfull in strengthening my faith.
 
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