Spiritually arid and need help

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I am 17 and new to this forum. Basically, I have gone to Catholic schools all of my life, but, I was not intent on going beyond my lukewarm religion classes until Lent when I was 15. I was on fire after learning more about the Faith on the Internet and prayer came so easily to me. I also had a lot of energy and was very productive in all of the areas of my life. That only lasted for a year and the next Lent everything became harder. I hardly do anything anymore besides sleep, go to school, and do homework. Prayer is much harder as I have rarely felt God’s presence and whenever I try, I usually feel like a submarine sending out sonar beams in an abyss with out receiving a signal in response.

Now, I have heard of the term dark night of the soul and I was wondering if anyone managed to get out of it, how did it happened and what did you do? I am also wondering if it is normal for such a period to dampen all other aspects of one’s life as it has done to mine. I have no energy for exercise, I drag myself through homework, I have a stack of half-read books on my desk that I am trying to get through, and I do not get as much joy from the things I used to love.

I was also wondering if it is normal for a teenager to go through a period in which he or she is stuck fluctuating in a spectrum from dullness to misery. Therapy has not worked for me which led me to think that these maybe are normal spiritual and/or mental growing pains. I am also very antisocial, it is just me and my parents for the most part. Since God is three persons, I was also thinking that maybe my spiritual troubles may be linked to my people problems. Sorry for this post being so long, I just want (name removed by moderator)ut from more experienced people from every angle at which I have looked at this issue. Thanks.
 
Fatigue, and what appears to be some depression may have health causes.
You may be lonely and while I understand introversion, and was an extremely shy young person, I do know that when Jesus gave us His summary of the commandments, it was to love God above all and to love others as ourselves. He also makes clear in Matthew 25 verses 31-46, that practical acts of kindness, not our feelings, is the basis for His judgement of our souls. Therefore our outreach to others is very important. An introverted person may not be able to sustain prolonged company without feeling the need for some solitude, however the effort to be kind to others is an important requirement for our salvation.

Regarding health of body, mind and emotional well-being, a balanced diet, healthy exercise, sufficient rest and healthy recreation, are all important to the whole human person.

During a time of particular fatigue I believed that stress in difficult family times was cause. No, I have an immune system with a low IQ and my brain thinks my thyroid is a foreign object to attack. I have since discovered other autoimmune issues…unexpectedly as one doesn’t consider one may have illnesses. Some other lifelong issues found diagnosis also…none of which I expected. We aren’t always aware of our physical or our mental needs…and I can go into the whole spiritual dryness area, and some people will, but we do need to look at our emotional and physical health when we have symptoms like lethargy and fatigue.

There is much available on spiritual dryness, and Saints like Therese of Lisieux and St Teresa of Jesus (Avila) also experienced these, sometimes for years.
Our feelings are necessarily relevant to our relationship with God.
What we must offer is faithfulness and faith (at times without feeling anything.) Likewise, we are required to be kind and pleasant and helpful to others even when we don’t feel like that, beginning with our family, but also those whom we encounter elsewhere.

May God guide, and bless you, now and always.

Kind wishes,
Trishie
 
I suggest that you meditate on our Lord’s Passion every morning for 15 minutes, and pray to Jesus, even though you may not feel like it. God bless you.
 
St. Francis de Sales in his Introduction to a Devout Live has given a few things to be done with aridity. I don’t think anyone should jump to the conclusion that they’re in the Dark Night of the Soul since that takes a whole lot of spiritual maturity to experience. Health and fatigue, spiritual sloth, spiritual arrogance, duplicity and sublety in our confessions, etc, can cause aridity in our prayer. I know since I’m going through this myself. I can probably lay all the causes at my door. I won’t go into all the things he says to do since he can say it much better than I. His description of this is probably a little more than 1/3 of the way through the book.
 
In addition to the above advice, I suggest that you talk to your confessor about these matters. The faith journey is a life long one and such lows - along with the highs - are to be expected.
You may find the book in my signature to be of help in understanding some of what is going on.

You ask how one gets out of this…one waits upon the Lord.
Also one seeks the council of a good spiritual director…a regular confessor and possibly a professional spiritual director. People trained and experienced in these matters.

That said, It is unlikely that what you are experiencing is a true “dark night of the soul”…more likely what you are experiencing is a concerted effort my satan to discourage and distract you. He is tempting you to despair.

Some things that you can do - - change up your prayer life. Commit to reading just 2 pages a day out of one of the books you have half finished. Don’t worry about comprehension or retention…just read the words. Same with prayer…even though you might not "feel the power’, say the words.
Activity is also a good antidote…try to find some volunteer work. It doesn’t have to be much, but let it get you out and around people.

Just some thoughts.

God bless you on your journey.

Peace
James
 
*Introduction to the Devout Life *by St. Francis de Sales. The CAF member who spoke about it said some very important things worth considering pertaining to causes of aridity. God bless you.
 
Redbetta, everybody goes through this now and again. I know I certainly did when I was 17. It seems to be a common age for an arid spell.

I can only add my ringing endorsement to those things that others have said. Saint Francis de Sales deals with this masterfully. To my mind, it belongs next to The Bible and The Imitation of Christ in eminence among spiritual books. Likewise, be frank with your confessor about your struggle with this, and obey his counsels.

I’d also add that you’re in good company. Many of the saints, many of them acknowledged as spiritual masters, have gone through dry spells. Mother Teresa, for instance, suffered aridity throughout most of her professed life. The Lord allows this that we may learn to let go of those things we don’t truly need anymore that we might follow Him better. As you’re 17, at the doorway of adulthood, this is surely something to take seriously, particularly as you are now likely being purged of certain habits that might prevent you from following your vocation in life. Maintain a life of prayer, even if it seems rote or mechanical, and Our Lord will surely return to show you the way to follow Him.

A last thing I’d add: worry less about yourself, and learn to serve others better. The spiritual works of mercy might seem daunting at this point, but the corporal works of mercy should not. I recommend contacting the Catholic Charities office nearest you and asking how you can volunteer to assist in the Church’s care of the poor. You will likely be surprised at how this changes you, and very pleasantly at that.

God bless.
 
I am 17 and new to this forum.
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I look back at when I was your age and I see how difficult that age period can be. It is a transition period of going from a child to an adult, and it can be very challenging. There are many adjustments, mainly of ignoring what I was and accepting what I had become. No small thing. Growing in every direction, outwardly and inwardly in mind and body, as well as adjustments to new friends and schools. Looking back I see it as a nice time in my life but going thru it was something else.

You are young yet and are going thru so much. I can well understand if your faith too is affected by all of changes in your life, because it is confusing and new.

If I had only one suggestion to make it would be this…stay close to Jesus in the sacraments of confession and communion. He will be there for you as he was for me.

May God bless and keep you. May God’s face shine on you. May God be kind to you and give you peace.
 
Thanks for the replies. I mentioned that I wanted (name removed by moderator)ut on this issue from every angle. Well, looking back on my post the next day, I realized that I have forgotten the most obvious one. I am just really busy. I spend an hour a day commuting to school and an hour coming back. With that, I usually start homework around 4:30 after school and I average about three - four hours a night of homework but can more and go to bed around 9:30 to get at least seven hours of sleep.

Now, in the brief period of spiritual growth, I had no problem with such a schedule but now with the lack of energy, I has become harder on me. Although, I sleep more now while before I would stay up all night to finish projects. I still recuperated fairly quickly from staying up so often when my spiritual life was good and now that my spiritual life went down hill, I go to bed earlier but it takes me an hour to fall asleep most often and I am dependent on an off-the-shelf sleep aid.

Another thing may be that I feel like I am going nowhere with my hard work. Six my ten classes are advanced level and my grade point average is among the top ten in my school. I am trying as hard as I can to get into someplace competitive for college and my parents say that they are proud of me, but, I feel as though everything is in vain. My peers who also are at the same level as me can get the same grades and have a life. With me it can only be either/or unless I drop hours of sleep and thereby neglect my health.

So, this is a major reason that I can never get anything done and read is that I have little time. Someone mentioned that I should volunteer instead of worrying about my life. Well, I used to be an assistant in the religious education program at my parish but had to drop it when I started ACT prep classes. So it is not that I just mope around the house. Still, I had no problem being so busy a year before and I cannot imagine why I lost it now. Sorry again for being so long. I asked before if I was normal to feel the way I do. Now, is it normal for a girl my age to be grim, without motivation, and with little to no personality?

I hope I am not annoying anyone. By no means do I believe my life cannot be worse, I am just hoping that someone here has tackled timing issues or anything else that I mentioned or knows someone that does. Thanks and thanks again to those who already replied.
 
Being a contract tutor, I hear this a lot from my students, and I will agree: there’s just too much work, so much that it can drain not only education, but life itself, of its savour.

It’s good in this state to remember Our Lord’s words regarding how those who lose their lives shall find them anew. It takes a journey through a spiritual desert of sorts, a difficult patch of life that sometimes we can only offer up as penance. Spiritual reading, if you have the time, may be helpful, as can prayers of abandonment to the divine will.

But I also have another, more pragmatic suggestion. Based on your age, I would presume that your graduation is approaching this year or next. In many other countries (I am assuming you’re in the US), it’s common for students to take a gap year between secondary and university studies. This is a practice that I wish would catch on here. If you can do this, I would advise it. Moreover, I would advise devoting that year to volunteering, perhaps even in a domestic or foreign mission. Even completely secular people who have done this say that it was an experience that did much to dispel the gloom of their lives and to put a lot in perspective.

If you’re able to do this, strongly consider it.

God bless.
 
Bardegaulois, yes I am from the U.S. The problem with taking a year off between high school and college is that it may be harder to settle back into an academic environment. The youth minister at my parish did just this and he told me that it was hard to catch up. So I am going to go straight from high school to college so that the material that I’ve learned will stay fresh in my mind.

For volunteering, there is always summer break to do that. What I do not understand is how my peers can have the same workload while doing so much more. When I go to school, I just see all the other girls full of youthful vigor and chatting away on all the other things they do with their lives while I just have my text books and little else. It is depressing. Thanks for the suggestion anyway, I’m glad you are understanding of my situation.
 
Could you find a place that has perpetual adoration? Spend about at least 10 minutes there. Do a decade of the rosary. Read the Psalms. Imitation of Christ was a good suggestion. I read somewhere recently that when we have a spiritual dryness, it is not that God has left us, but is leading us. Seek and you shall find. Knock and the door will be opened.
 
Hello Redbetta

If you enjoy reading books I would thoroughly recommend reading Sister Ruth Burrows’ “The Essence of Prayer”. She is a Carmelite nun of many decades of faithful life now. But she has never felt the presence of God! That’s real faith 🙂

Her main point in the book is that we must not agonise over whether our prayer is dry or not. Rather when we set aside time for prayer (in whatever way you prefer) we trust that God works in us, whether we feel it or not. She is also keen that we don’t judge one type of prayer as ‘better’ than another, because it is not our prayer that is doing the ‘work’, but that it is God who works with and in us. She is keen that we set aside some regular time each day; it is our time that we bring to God - everything else we trust to him. But don’t agonise over whether you feel anything, or worry about what technique of prayer your should be using (pick one that are most comfortable with, or ring the changes).

God bless you Redbetta. I think many of us have found that our feelings of faith wax and wane over time. Try not to worry too much about it.

Michael
 
What is described by St John of the Cross as the “Dark Night of the Soul,” is experienced by few people, and generally, those advanced souls who have reached spiritual union.

Most of us experience what St John calls, “The Dark Night of Sense.” This is where the fervor we experienced in prayer no longer exists.

We become bored with prayer and will allow ourselves excuses for skipping it.

This is the mistake we make, and as St John says, the best course of action is to continue in prayer.

My advice is to continue in prayer because you love God, because he is God, and not the feelings you receive when you are devote.

The spiritual journey is a purgation of our disordered appetites, which even those of the religious nature can be an impediment toward our spiritual progress.

So, relax, it’s part of your spiritual path, which Christ has you on, so trust in him and continue to pray daily. Jesus understands your school commitments and wouldn’t want you to take time off, in an attempt to satisfy your prayer life, according to your own agenda.

Trust is God, and continue to go to Him in prayer, regardless of how many times you may fail Him.

Jim
 
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