Well, my reaction to the post and the following discussion is…are we discussing holding the male responsible for the female using him as an object of self-pleasure? Because it seemed to veer into a discussion of male masturbation very quickly.
If she knows she has these erogenous zones outside the normal primary and secondary sexual characteristics (genitals, breasts), then isn’t it her responsibility to guard her chastity against lust and/or masturbation (whatever y’all decided what that was)?
Especially assuming that she knows her body and he doesn’t because they are unmarried and pursuing chastity.
If she didn’t know her body and had an oopsie orgasm unexpectedly, then there would be no moral culpability because she didn’t have the knowledge to form full consnet of the will. However, she has this knowledge know and would need to take it into account in guarding her own chastity in the future.
Women are moral agents too, and can’t hand off the responsibility for their orgasms and morals to the men in their life. That’s all I’m sayin’.
One point about “squirming” O’s…the powerful bonding hormone oxytocin is released at orgasm. It is binding a couple together outside of marriage, so there is a body-lie being told here. There is no sacramental and legal commitment bond to back up the biology. There is no total self-donation and no unity of the unitive and procreative. I see that as another problem of the mutual wanking, heavy petting, not-going-all-the-way mutual pleasuring activities of unmarrieds. It just isn’t truthful. (Even if society accepts it and much, much more.)
To the suffering teenagers and young adults: part of your suffering is that our society has extended adolescence and pushed back the age of marriage so far, that there is a wider gulf between biological maturity and marriage. So your burden is greater than any previous generation. Also, a lot of the compulsion is hormonal. Hormones have powerful effects on mind, drive, emotion, behavior. You can’t use it as an excuse, but I promise you, those hormones will start fading away in your thirties and you will have greater peace in your life as you are freed from the burden. You aren’t going to be tortured by your hormones this intensely for the rest of your lives, I promise! So fight the good fight, and once married, really enjoy a healthy and holy sexuality with your spouse with a clean conscience.
