Staying home because you can

[mommamaree]

This is sort of an odd question, but I was wondering if anybody else has had any experience with this.

Right now, my husband and I both have jobs that pay okay but not great. Together, we make enough to live comfortably. Currently, he’s looking to upgrade jobs that would result in a pay raise, but would require us to move. If that happens, we were thinking that I could quit working and stay home instead of trying to find a new job in our new location. I know that there are a lot of stay-at-home spouses here, but there’s a bit of a wrinkle – we don’t currently have kids or I’m not currently pregnant. I would be a stay-at-home housewife, and not a stay-at-home mom.

Has anybody else done that? It seems like it would be a bit weird, and maybe I’d end up getting a part time job or something just to have something to do, but I was wondering if other people had some first hand experiences with such a living situation.

I have been in this situation. When my husband and I graduated college, his first job out of school was a very high-paying job and I could have stayed home from the beginning. However, I chose to find a job that would fulfill me in some way. I took an extremely low-paying job as a middle school science and social studies teacher (seriously low-paying…one year I only made about 12K). But I loved it! It was great to be able to use my education, meet people, do important work, and mature as a person until my husband and I were in a place where we were prepared to start our family. I did it for three years, but I have great memories and valuable experience that will continue to carry me forward in my life.
I couldn’t have been a stay-at-home spouse because I, personally, would have been lonely and bored and isolated. It was important for my personal development and emotional wellbeing. But not everyone will have these same reasons.
To the OP, you know yourself and your spouse knows you. Think about what you will need, on a daily or weekly basis, to keep growing and maturing and developing as a human being. Can you meet your needs as a stay-at-home spouse in ways other than having a job? If you can, then go for it. If you can’t, maybe just look around for a job that will be fulfilling for you, even if it isn’t the best-paying job. Good luck!

 

[TheRealJuliane]

I would recommend some sort of structured volunteer work in a field that you would possibly be interested should you have to return to paid work some day. Pick something you love, and stay involved in the field. At some point, get a few reference letters from people you have worked with.

Or, if you already have a profession, keep up whatever certifications you have, or keep up with the field in whatever way you can. If you do have kids, they grow up in just a few years and then you might want to resume working. Or, worst case scenario - something happens to your husband and you HAVE TO resume working.

Other than that, just make sure your husband is on the same wavelength and you are not going to hear snide comments about, “What did YOU do all day, dear?”

 

[Oh_Charlotte]

I am posting to OP before I read replies, so sorry if this has been said.

Being a stay-at-home housewife won’t earn you any respect from society; its likely to earn you scorn. So if your identity is tied up in what other people think of you, you might better avoid this. But if your identity is in Christ, and you want to do this, and feel you can serve God and your vocation doing it, then go for it!