Staying in the pew during communion

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Imatreehugger

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Hello everyone,

I have a question regarding communion lines and proper procedures during the communion.

My Father-in-Law recently passed away and my husband has expressed interest in becoming an active Catholic once again. I personally am not Catholic. My question is, when the others in my family go to recieve communion, should I join them in the communion line and cross my arms or do I stay seated in the pew? If I stay seated in the pew (I have done this in the past) it always seems to be awkward for everyone to be seated again. Common sense would tell me to sit at the end of the pew so that I can step out to let others pass without getting stepped on and everything else that comes with keeping my seat. :o Issue number 1…what if those seats at the end of the pew are already occupied? Is it proper to stand at the end of the pew and join my family as they come back from receiving communion? What is the least problematic way to handle this?
 
Yes, you would simply stay in the pew. You can step out, let others pass, then step back in.

I think your solution is just fine regarding how to accommodate those going in and out of the rows. There isn’t any particular protocol or etiquette, so do whatever seems best.
 
You should stay in the pew and pray.

In particular you should pray an Act of Spiritual Communion. Here are two examples:

Act of Spiritual Communion
by Saint Alphonsus Liguori
My Jesus,
I believe that You
are present in the Most Holy Sacrament.
I love You above all things,
and I desire to receive You into my soul.
Since I cannot at this moment
receive You sacramentally,
come at least spiritually into my heart. I embrace You as if You were already there and unite myself wholly to You. Never permit me to be separated from You.
Amen.–

Act of Spiritual Communion
By Cardinal Rafael Merry dal Val
At Thy feet, O my Jesus, I prostrate myself and I offer Thee repentance of my contrite heart, which is humbled in its nothingness and in Thy holy presence. I adore Thee in the Sacrament of Thy love, the ineffable Eucharist. I desire to receive Thee into the poor dwelling that my heart offers Thee. While waiting for the happiness of sacramental communion, I wish to possess Thee in spirit. Come to me, O my Jesus, since I, for my part, am coming to Thee! May Thy love embrace my whole being in life and in death. I believe in Thee, I hope in Thee, I love Thee. Amen.
 
Imatreehugger said:
Hello everyone,

I have a question regarding communion lines and proper procedures during the communion.

My Father-in-Law recently passed away and my husband has expressed interest in becoming an active Catholic once again. I personally am not Catholic. My question is, when the others in my family go to recieve communion, should I join them in the communion line and cross my arms or do I stay seated in the pew? If I stay seated in the pew (I have done this in the past) it always seems to be awkward for everyone to be seated again. Common sense would tell me to sit at the end of the pew so that I can step out to let others pass without getting stepped on and everything else that comes with keeping my seat. :o Issue number 1…what if those seats at the end of the pew are already occupied? Is it proper to stand at the end of the pew and join my family as they come back from receiving communion? What is the least problematic way to handle this?
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I sympathize with you! It can be quite awkward, and you feel like you’re in the way.
Personally, I look to see who is distributing Communion to my area. If it’s a priest or deacon, I join the line, cross my arms, and receive a blessing once I get to the front. Then I can follow everyone back and return to my seat. This is the “smoothest” way, since no one has to step over me, etc.

If it’s an EMHC (lay person, you can tell because they aren’t wearing vestments), I remain seated, because they aren’t supposed to give a blessing. So if I’m at the end of the aisle, I will get out and let others by. If I’m in the middle of the pew, I will just move my legs to the side and they have to step over me :o I don’t like to do that, but I don’t really have a choice.

I’ve tried to always sit in the pews where the priest or deacon administers Communion so that I can go get a blessing, but they change it up. Sometimes they go to the middle, other times the sides. So I never know.
 
Ok Thanks…I just want to stay out of the way as much as possible and was wondering the best way to accomplish this. Sitting at the beginning or at the end of the pew may keep me out of the way enough to avoid awkward moments. 🙂 If I have to sit in the middle…SORRY! 😃
 
Don’t worry about it. There are always others who do not go up also. Family who are not Catholic, non-Catholic friends, those in RCIA waiting to join the church, and Catholics who are not prepared to receive that day.

If you can sit at the end, that is easiest for you. If you can’t, make sure the kneeler is up and scrunch to the side (just like you would at a theater! ;))
 
Imatreehugger said:
. My question is, when the others in my family go to recieve communion, should I join them in the communion line and cross my arms or do I stay seated in the pew? If I?
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the etiquette has always been those who are not receiving simply stay in the pew, sitting, standing or kneeling, as they feel comfortable, and singing if there is a hymn and they wish to join in. It is a simple matter to simply move your legs slightly, as you would in a theater or other such place, when people return to their seats. If they make you feel awkward it is their problem, not yours. Best not to approach with your arms folded for a blessing unless specifically invited to do so, as it is not a custom everywhere.
 
I sit on the outside end of the pew so that people don’t have to climb over me. Sitting on the inside end and stepping out is awkward because the usher is standing there when it is time for my pew to file out.

I arrive earlier than many (and many arrive late), so I don’t have trouble finding a seat on the outside end.
 
Easiest thing is to just step to the side and let the family pass you. It may seem like you are the only one still in the pew but I assure you you are not. Next time take a look around, those still in their pews are either not catholic, waiting to become catholic (but they usually go for a blessing) and those catholics that have not been to confession! No one really looks around to see who is sitting and who is in line, it may seem that way though. I remember feeling the same way. I eventually started RCIA and started going for blessings. Now, some times I’m in line and sometiems I’m in the pew. It depends if confession was necessary and if I went. But I agree…Becoming catholic would make everything easier 🙂
 
To follow up on Puzzleannie in our parish we have been instructed specifically not to come up for blessings, only communicants. Thus listen for an announcement if its okay or one Sunday observe if its done. And advoid a line with an EMHC, we are not supposed to give blessings.
 
dconklin said:
Becoming Catholic would solve this issue! :tiphat:
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I don’t really think this is true. I am now a Catholic and it hasn’t solved the issue! There are still reasons not to go in line for communion, and to stay in the pews.

I hate being in the way too! It seems like when I try to sit on the end, I get pushed in the middle and end up being in people’s way. I feel like it disturbs everyone a lot and that I’m being rude. 😊
 
anp1215 said:
Personally, I look to see who is distributing Communion to my area. If it’s a priest or deacon, I join the line, cross my arms, and receive a blessing once I get to the front. Then I can follow everyone back and return to my seat. This is the “smoothest” way, since no one has to step over me, etc.
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While it may be a smooth move, this is something that shouldn’t be done. At the end of Mass, the priest gives a blessing to all at Mass. There is no need to be in the communion line for a blessing. Stay seated, pray an act of spiritual communion, and get into RCIA as soon as possible!

If you need a special blessing, approach the priest after Mass and ask for one.
 
Rejoice in knowing you are in the presence of the True Presence.

Also, don’t worry too much about being in the way. It is a very small thing and 10 seconds later they will have received our Lord and be in spiritual bliss - at least they should be.
 
I_Thirst said:
While it may be a smooth move, this is something that shouldn’t be done. At the end of Mass, the priest gives a blessing to all at Mass. There is no need to be in the communion line for a blessing. Stay seated, pray an act of spiritual communion, and get into RCIA as soon as possible!

If you need a special blessing, approach the priest after Mass and ask for one.
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It’s my understanding that there is not a definitive teaching on receiving a blessing during Communion, and that the entire issue is murky at best. The priests and deacons have no issue with blessing those who do not receive. They do it quite frequently. Until one of them tells me to no longer come forward for a blessing, I will continue to do so.

Also, I have already enrolled in and finished RCIA.
 
anp1215 said:
It’s my understanding that there is not a definitive teaching on receiving a blessing during Communion, and that the entire issue is murky at best. The priests and deacons have no issue with blessing those who do not receive. They do it quite frequently. Until one of them tells me to no longer come forward for a blessing, I will continue to do so.
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If something is murky, then why continue its murky practice? Set a good example in your parish rather than propagating murky practices.

If you aren’t able to receive communion, don’t get in the communion line. It is not a line for blessings. It’s not a line for holy anointing. It’s not a reconcilation line. It’s not a line to venerate the cross. It’s not a line to stand in so that you don’t have to have people step over you in the pews so that it’ll go smoother for you.

It’s a line for the Eucharist.

Father Z has something interesting to say on this.
 
I_Thirst said:
If something is murky, then why continue its murky practice? Set a good example in your parish rather than propagating murky practices.

If you aren’t able to receive communion, don’t get in the communion line. It is not a line for blessings. It’s not a line for holy anointing. It’s not a reconcilation line. It’s not a line to venerate the cross. It’s not a line to stand in so that you don’t have to have people step over you in the pews so that it’ll go smoother for you.

It’s a line for the Eucharist.

Father Z has something interesting to say on this.
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I don’t know who Father Z is, and he’s certainly not a priest at the parish I attend. Like I said, if and when the priest at the parish I attend tells me to stop, I will.
And it’s really not so that it will “go smoother for [me],” it’s more in the interest of those around me.
 
anp1215 said:
I don’t know who Father Z is, and he’s certainly not a priest at the parish I attend. Like I said, if and when the priest at the parish I attend tells me to stop, I will.
And it’s really not so that it will “go smoother for [me],” it’s more in the interest of those around me.
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I guess that’s all there is to it. 🤷
 
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