Struggling to find my home in the church

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phil19034 said:
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adgloriam:
My parish is about 2000 years old…
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come on… no way it’s more than 1950 years old! 🤓
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Well, they say Saint James when to Compostela before that…But I’m not entirely sure of the dates. Ok, I’ll round the number downwards next time…🤣
 
adgloriam said:
40.png
phil19034:
40.png
adgloriam:
My parish is about 2000 years old…
Click to expand...
come on… no way it’s more than 1950 years old! 🤓
Click to expand...
Well, they say Saint James when to Compostela before that…But I’m not entirely sure of the dates. Ok, I’ll round the number downwards next time…🤣
Click to expand...
OK… I’ll give you 1980 years old, but not any more!!! 🙂
 
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Not every parish is great at being a Parish of Intentional Disciples (reading this book now, mind BLOWN)

I can tell you that sometimes parishes are stuck in inertia. Sometimes you simply need to meet the right person. Have you had a chance to go to the parish office, maybe bring some cookies and just visit with the office staff?
 
Yes, but I have also experienced many Catholics with a vibrant faith and warm community. It is not all doom and gloom! I am in the NW, I know it is considered “unchurched” but there are plenty of vibrant communities here and homeschoolers. My kids are all in Catholic schools I am just doing so much giving to my family and others and it would mean so much if someone would reach back.
 
I have read this book, Sherry Wendell is from these neck of the woods although I believe the St. Catherine Institute moved to Colorado.
 
I’m sorry for your troubles. I am praying for you and your parish.
 
I’m sorry you’re feeling a bit outside the circle right now. I know that can be really a hard place to be. And I know some parishes are just full of the right kind of people to help you feel welcome while others are stocked with shy introverts or reserved-one-focused types.

What I’ve always found in these situations though is that it means there’s a job for you to fill that’s been left empty. Knowing the difference between what it’s like to be in a connected and caring church means you’ve learned a valuable skill that your current church seems to be missing. It means you’ve got an insight into what would make your parish even stronger and more inviting to others who must feel like you do. It means you’ve got the answer to someone else’s quiet prayer.

So now you simply know that whenever possible? You need to watch for people on the side-lines and reach out to them. It can be with a simple nod to show you recognize them? Or a nice smile to try to cheer them? Or a compliment to someone doing their best to do their best? Or anything on and up from there.

The key is to act the way you wished others would act towards you. The key is to be a mirror of what you want others to show back your way. The key is to use your notice of the problem to solve the problem for even just 1 other person lurking in the back all alone.

And then maybe that way you’ll create a good example for others to follow along right back to you.

Or something.

Peace.

You’ve got my sympathies for the tough times you’ve been through and are going through. I’ll pray strong for your son. I hope everything works out ok.
 
All I can say, is sometimes it’s a great blessing to be anonymous in a parish.
Sometimes I feel like I’m just a walking set of keys. 😧
 
Thank you Trident, I love your beautiful philosophy/theology because I also truly believe God always brings people together to use all their gifts and talents and every person has a unique gift to bring.

Also to follow up on a previous posters comments, although I believe strongly in the value of socialising for socialising sake (and my mental health as an extrovert) what I am really missing is fellowship, when believers and disciples help build each other through prayer and mutual love in God’s service. The Intentional Disciples model. Once you have experienced that and the tremendous effect on your faith you want to recreate it.

Although going back to the pure human value of socialising, many studies show that the more relationships, friendships and connections we have the healthier and happier we are. It is the natural state that God has created us for, to be in community with each other.

Right now due to my son’s struggle I don’t have a lot of energy to branch into a new ministry but I will keep an open heart for the future.
 
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