Struggling with Emotions

[LaMusicaSenior]

So here is the story: I am seventeen and I don’t date as I feel I need to be focusing on my school, my relationship with God, and my family life. I do participate in youth group activities for my homeschool group, and there is a young man who comes to youth group who I admire.

He is Catholic, respectful towards all ages, able to converse with adults, committed to remaining pure, loves the Church and the Blessed Mother, treates his family with love, involved in the commmunity, etc. He is also discerning the priesthood.

I am not wanting a romantic reationship with him, as we are both too young to work towards marriage. I don’t want to be a distraction towards his vocation.

But I need some hints and suggestions on how to channel my emotions towards prayers for him and his vocation - whether that be marriage or the priesthood.

Appreciate any advice and thoughts.

God Bless.

 

[Joe_5859]

So here is the story: I am seventeen and I don’t date as I feel I need to be focusing on my school, my relationship with God, and my family life. I do participate in youth group activities for my homeschool group, and there is a young man who comes to youth group who I admire.

He is Catholic, respectful towards all ages, able to converse with adults, committed to remaining pure, loves the Church and the Blessed Mother, treates his family with love, involved in the commmunity, etc. He is also discerning the priesthood.

I am not wanting a romantic reationship with him, as we are both too young to work towards marriage. I don’t want to be a distraction towards his vocation.

But I need some hints and suggestions on how to channel my emotions towards prayers for him and his vocation - whether that be marriage or the priesthood.

Appreciate any advice and thoughts.

God Bless.

You both sound so mature and like you have your heads on straight that I don’t know that I can really give you any useful advice.

I think it’s great that you want to pray for him and his vocation – whatever it may be.

 

[sllhouette]

My thoughts:

Our culture is VERY relationship obsessed. Sometimes we don’t even realize the effect it has on us. Thinking that you are not going to be in a relationship is just as obsessed about relationships as thinking you are going to be in one. The way to be free is not to worry about dating at all. Don’t think about it.

There is a certain affection that you rightly should feel toward him and he toward you. He is your brother. You are his sister. If you are avoiding him because you don’t want to be a distraction then you are not showing him the sisterly affection that you should be. Further, you can’t possibly know what is a distraction to him and what is not. It is okay to like him. It is okay to be happy around him. It is okay to look forward to seeing him. Just be the person that God created you to be.

You are not too young to begin working toward marriage. In fact, you need to be praying about what marriage is and what it requires. Our society has things so backwards and we often don’t catch the lies. Especially when we think we have… Also, you need to discern your desires. What is it that you really want? What is at the very heart of your motivation?

Oddly enough, I strongly feel that this viewing him as your brother and yourself as his sister is a necessary first step toward both marriage and religious life. If you ever do end up dating, don’t ever think that you are ‘taking him away from the priesthood’. The decision is his to make, not yours.

 

[LaMusicaSenior]

Thank you so much for your advice, you two. Very insightful and definatly gives me something to think about.