Struggling with faith

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Tannhauser

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So… I tend to have quite a strong faith, and on most days I feel a wonderful sense of God’s urgency in my life, and real sense of being there with him…

However in the last day or so I’ve felt a little bereft… basically, I find myself asking God for things - small things - say to help me with my faith or to strengthen it or to reassure me of his love; and sometimes even things like to help me with things in the day (silly things like praying that I will make the bus etcetera), and I feel like God is not responding really at all. It feels like he’s just not there or not listening, and I am finding myself just feeling like “well, what the hell with it” really…

I just don’t know what to do and am wondering if anyone else has felt like this.

It has reached the point where I cannot even muster up the enthusiasm to pray because I feel like its pointless, and I don’t want to ask for anything, because I feel like it just won’t happen and then I’ll doubt God even more.

Eugh. Help?
 
Yes, even many of the greatest saints have felt such darkness or distance from God. Look into Mother Teresa’s Dark Night or read Padre Pio’s letters in his early years as a priest—he often struggled with Christ’s distance as well. Your faith might be much greater than you think, for those who can believe in darkness without seeing are great faithful indeed. :o
 
I know that there are times when I feel further from God. I think it happens in two different ways. The first is when we move away from God by chosing to do what we want in a particular circumstance. It may not necessarily be evil, but just “good” instead of the “best”. Things like we are busy and don’t take time to pray. Or we may be so concerned about a legitimate problem that we try to manage on our own. Just a slight movement away from God can lead us to feel alone and like He doesn’t care. If this is the case, then some time spent in prayer in front of the Blessed Sacrament usually gets me back to where I need to be with God. Followed by a good confession.

The second, is when God allows us to go through a dry time, our desert, our valley. I have heard these called by many different names. It ends up with us needing to cling to Him in order for us to get through these very disconcerting times. Confession, frequent reception of Communion, prayer, all the Sacraments are great ways to cling to God and to overcome these times.

Don’t become discouraged and spend unnecessary time worrying about the effects. Identify why, as best you can, and take the appropriate steps to get this over with. I pray that your sojourn may be short-lived and that your reembrace of our Saviour will be “awesome”.

In His service,
Stan
 
I rarely ask for ‘things’ from God. Out of fear, at times I’ll ask for customers (business owner). But, by in large, I rest assured that God provides and that this life is unfortunately / fortunately temporary. I ask for strength to deal with whatever comes and I pray that every soul reach out and open the door for the Holy Spirit.

I have to retrain myself daily to thank God for all that He provides. I remind myself of the group of lepers that Jesus healed and only one person came back to thank Him.
 
You have great company! Many, many, of the saints have felt this way. It is called “aridity”. God does it to HELPFUL! Seems strange? Think of it this way. When you are teaching a baby to walk you hold his hand for a while - to let him get the feel of walking. Then, at some point, you let go. If the baby could talk it might say something like “COME BACK! You’ve left me!”, but really you are there - you just know that if the baby is ever to walk on its own and truly grow - then it needs to walk without that helping hand.

When God removes the feeling of his presence from our lives he is asking us to grow more. It’s easy to believe in Him when we feel him, but how about when we don’t feel Him? Can we (will we) still walk in faith?

We owe God worship because we are created by Him, he is our creator and Lord. So “feeling like” praying (or not feeling) does not really come into it - we do it because we owe it to God, not because we get good feeling out of it.

There are some books by the Saints that you might find interesting. The best is by St. Teresa of Avila and is called the Interior Castle. In the book she likens the journey of complete union with God to passing through “mansions” (layers) of a jewel. We are headed to the 7th mansion - which is at the center of the jewel - and contains complete union with God. But along the way we have to fight “creatures” that would distract us from the journey. Her “Way of Perfection” is also good. St. John of the Cross talks about the way of “Nada” and “The Dark Night of the Soul.” Heavy stuff, but very helpful in developing a spiritual life.

God must think you are capable of “bigger stuff” if he’s giving you this opportunity to strengthen your “faith muscles”! 👍
 
Tannhauser said:
However in the last day or so I’ve felt a little bereft… basically, I find myself asking God for things - small things - say to help me with my faith or to strengthen it or to reassure me of his love; and sometimes even things like to help me with things in the day (silly things like praying that I will make the bus etcetera), and I feel like God is not responding really at all. It feels like he’s just not there or not listening, and I am finding myself just feeling like “well, what the hell with it” really…
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The first thing that God is due is our adoration. Then after, praise and thanksgiving. This is solely because of God’s goodness - no other reason needed. After that He is due propitiation due to our sinfulness and lack of faith, and finally (last of all), prayers of petition. Do you know of a “friend” who only appears when in need? How bothersome they become! Let us not be as that person unto God. Let us praise and adore Him constantly. As to the rest, He knows our needs long before we are aware of them.
Tannhauser said:
I just don’t know what to do and am wondering if anyone else has felt like this.
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Mother Teresa felt a spiritual dryness for decades, but kept on anyway. I must say that she was quite British in that regard.
Tannhauser said:
It has reached the point where I cannot even muster up the enthusiasm to pray because I feel like its pointless, and I don’t want to ask for anything, because I feel like it just won’t happen and then I’ll doubt God even more.
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We are often tempted to withdraw to a point within ourselves and remain unhappily there. This is not at all what God wants. He prefers that we reach out to those less fortunate - that we go outside of ourselves and obtain an appreciation for the true suffering of others - many who speak not one word about it.

Might I suggest that you go and spend time with our Lord in Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament? Even if He remains in the Tabernacle, just go, and spend time with Him. Being in His physical presence has a way of renewing your spirit - which is precisely what you are in need of.
 
For me, the difficult times generally follow when I’ve fallen back into sin, and don’t promptly confess.

David speaks to this in Psalms 66:18
“If I had regarded iniquity in my heart, the Lord would not have listened to my heart. But, truly God has listened; he has given heed to the voice of my prayer.”

So, giving consideration to new sin [or thinking back with pleasure on our past sins of the flesh] … is an abomination to God, and he will not consider our current prayers until we confess/repent of. Often-times we bring about our own ‘dark nights’ of the soul.
 
I am right there with you. I love God but I find myself wondering if God loves me back.

My Priest asked me about my prayer life and how I feel after I pray. I didn’t know how to answer him. I didn’t know I was supposed to feel anything. I never really have. I have changed how I pray, I have begun going to adoration as often as possible. I have come back to the sacrament of confession and brought to the Lord things I have been holding onto for 20yrs…and still nothing. The only grace I have received is this…I am NOT a whore…for most of my life I have considered myself a whore and through prayer I have come to know this to be false and I am so thankful for that…but I want more. Maybe that is selfish, but I feel like I need mini-graces every so often to keep me from giving up.

Hang in there. It is not easy, but know that you are not alone in how you are feeling
 
Maureen1125 said:
I am right there with you. I love God but I find myself wondering if God loves me back.

My Priest asked me about my prayer life and how I feel after I pray. I didn’t know how to answer him. I didn’t know I was supposed to feel anything. I never really have. I have changed how I pray, I have begun going to adoration as often as possible. I have come back to the sacrament of confession and brought to the Lord things I have been holding onto for 20yrs…and still nothing. The only grace I have received is this…I am NOT a whore…for most of my life I have considered myself a whore and through prayer I have come to know this to be false and I am so thankful for that…but I want more. Maybe that is selfish, but I feel like I need mini-graces every so often to keep me from giving up.

Hang in there. It is not easy, but know that you are not alone in how you are feeling
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The evil one tricks us into believing that we are not good; that we are not salvageable. Whore might have been what you did, but it most definitely is not what you were or are. Amen!
 
Po18guy - Thanks. Many people told me the same thing, but until I believed it for myself that was the only identity I had and I continued to behave in an unpure manner. Dressing provocatively, flirting, engaging in improper messaging/texting…I no longer do these things. Every few months, I find myself missing those “chats” but I am finding it easier to resist the urge.
 
Maureen1125 said:
Po18guy - Thanks. Many people told me the same thing, but until I believed it for myself that was the only identity I had and I continued to behave in an unpure manner. Dressing provocatively, flirting, engaging in improper messaging/texting…I no longer do these things. Every few months, I find myself missing those “chats” but I am finding it easier to resist the urge.
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When you realize the spirit that prompted those chats, and where they were intended to lead you. Years back, as a police officer, I once told an arrested pole dancer just how much God loved her - that she was as precious to Him as any human that had ever lived. Her expression went blank - clearly she thought much less of herself than God did, and had simply never heard that message before. I left her with a pocket New Testament and prayed for her.

You have received a grace form God for exactly the same reason.
 
@OP: Well, if you keep working at it long enough, I’d imagine your faith will return. To use a very crass phrase, “fake it till you make it” is a valid psychological tool. In matters of faith it seems to work as well as it does everywhere else, and it is highly effective.

That isn’t a guarantee, but it’s the best shot you have if retaining faith is important to you. Surrounding yourself with the secondary things of your faith is important too…church, like minded social groups, media consumption (read your Bible and faith based books), etc. I suppose that is the same thing though, just encompassing the external as well as the internal.

As long as you’ve been a member of your religion from a young age, I wouldn’t worry too much about it. If you are a newer convert you probably need to put more work into it to buttress your beliefs against doubt.
 
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