Stupid situation

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Quilemiaquemzil

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I am a girl that is 15 years old. I live with my father and he controls me trying to be a good parent. It is obvious that he has his own problems (presumably since the 1960s) and he would be much better off sorting out his own life instead of looking after me. And he’s not doing me any good either, he’s only making me unhappy, and by continually trying to ‘protect’ me all the time,he is only going to damage me. He’s not doing either of us any good, by continuing to blindly enforce this situation, instead of looking at it objectively and realizing it’s not actually going to be of any benefit. But I’ve tried to talk to him and there’s nothing I can do.

And I am obsessed with this girl who has a baby. She tried to be friends but I got too excited and showed off by being continually disruptive, behaving like a vandal and throwing a bottle at her car. That was stupid. Now even if she still likes me, she probably thinks it’s better not to get involved with me anymore, and she’s right because I know it could probably only cause uncomfortable situations anyway. But it’s depressing. What should I do? I have to listen to my unfortunate well-meaning father, I can’t be friends with that girl who I love, and there’s no sign of it getting any better. 😦
 
Quilemiaquemzil said:
I am a girl that is 15 years old. I live with my father and he controls me trying to be a good parent. It is obvious that he has his own problems (presumably since the 1960s) and he would be much better off sorting out his own life instead of looking after me. And he’s not doing me any good either, he’s only making me unhappy, and by continually trying to ‘protect’ me all the time,he is only going to damage me. He’s not doing either of us any good, by continuing to blindly enforce this situation, instead of looking at it objectively and realizing it’s not actually going to be of any benefit. But I’ve tried to talk to him and there’s nothing I can do.

And I am obsessed with this girl who has a baby. She tried to be friends but I got too excited and showed off by being continually disruptive, behaving like a vandal and throwing a bottle at her car. That was stupid. Now even if she still likes me, she probably thinks it’s better not to get involved with me anymore, and she’s right because I know it could probably only cause uncomfortable situations anyway. But it’s depressing. What should I do? I have to listen to my unfortunate well-meaning father, I can’t be friends with that girl who I love, and there’s no sign of it getting any better. 😦
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It’s not a stupid question. By coming here for advice you are showing some good judgement. Right now it would be best to stay close to dad and follow his advice. It might not feel like it, but if you have a good dad who cares, you are really lucky!

It’s also normal to have some pretty crazy feelings at 15. Those crazy feelings will settle down as you grow over the years. As long as dad is treating you in a christian way, stick by him! You can’t go wrong!

Peace.
🙂
 
TLM08 said:
It’s not a stupid question. By coming here for advice you are showing some good judgement. Right now it would be best to stay close to dad and follow his advice. It might not feel like it, but if you have a good dad who cares, you are really lucky!

It’s also normal to have some pretty crazy feelings at 15. Those crazy feelings will settle down as you grow over the years. As long as dad is treating you in a christian way, stick by him! You can’t go wrong!

Peace.
🙂
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Good advice. 👍
 
  • :gopray: Peace . . .
As a fifteen year old you are very much your Father’s responsibility . . . and he would be . . . greatly in error . . . if he did not take that responsibility very seriously every day of his life . . . *and you’re trying to judge him because he may not be perfect is not in the least appropriate *. . . you need to love and honor him as your Father and thank God you have a caring parent . . . and understand that all human beings have weaknesses as well as strengths . . .

Below are some Sacred Scriptures from the **Holy :bible1: Bible **. . . As a child of your caring Father . . . our Wonderful Lord would have you understand that you . . . also . . . as his daughter . . . have very real responsibilities . . . If you will meditate upon the Scriptures below . . . and try to live them out in your life . . . they can help you greatly to find you way closer to the Loving Heart . . . ❤️ . . . of our Wonderful God . . . and to live in harmony with those about you . . .

**“Honour **thy father and thy mother:
that thy days may be long upon the land
which the LORD thy God giveth thee.”
Exodus 20:12
:bible1:

By what you shared in your post . . . your judgment . . . at this point in your life . . . appears to be very poor in the matter of understanding healthy relationships . . . with your parent and with your neighbor . . . in particular with the potential friend you mentioned . . . If you don’t have a church . . . you need to search one out . . . and talk with the priest . . . and seek help also from him . . . The church fellowship and the teachings of the Holy Catholic Church . . . and the fellowship with people of all ages therein . . . are there to help you grow in the Love of God and love of your neighbor . . . and will help you in gaining healthy, upright and controlled relationships . . . and will help you discern the difference between true . . .

"freedom" . . . wherein one always bears a loving responsibility for those around you . . .
and
"license" . . . wherein one does whatever they like regardless of the consequences
and how much it may hurt others as well as yourself . . .

and to discern the differences between . . . right and good . . . and . . . wrong and evil . . . and to act in accordance with that which is right and good . . . We all need a wisdom beyond our experience . . . *no matter what age we are *. . . God’s Wisdom is available for us all to find in Sacred Scripture . . . and God’s Wonderful Holy Presence is available to bless our lives every day through His Holy Catholic Church . . . to guide us into the Holy Pathways of God through life . . .

“Obey them that have the rule over you,
and submit yourselves:
for they watch for your souls,
as they that must give account,
that they may do it with joy,
and not with grief:
for that is unprofitable for you.”
Hebrews 13:17
:bible1:

“Children,
obey your parents
in the LORD:
for this is right.”
Ephesians 6:1
:bible1:

“Children,
obey your parents in all things:
for this is well pleasing
unto the LORD.”
Colossians 3:20
:bible1:

Whenever you find yourself “out of control” . . . try praying the Hail Mary Prayer below . . . your Holy Mother is always available to help whenever you seek her help . . . *God bless . . . *

The Hail Mary

Hail Mary . . . full of grace . . . the Lord is with thee . . . blessed art thou among women . . . and blessed is the Fruit of thy womb . . . Jesus . . . Holy Mary . . . Mother of God . . . pray for us sinners . . . now and at the hour of our death . . . Amen . . .

. . . all for Jesus+

​
 
I would cut dad some slack. I raised 3 girls, and I wish I would have done things a lot differently, but being over-lenient is not one of them.

Perhaps maybe you and dad could sit down together with an objective third party who can maybe help break down some communication barriers?

Good luck and God bless you.
 
I am a 50 year old dad of a 15 year old daughter. In my 50 years I have seen many situations and it should be no surprise that I would want to protect my daughter from the many harms that are out there. My daughter and I get along great but she would be the first to tell you how protective I can get. Why? Because I love her with all of my heart. It is not her decisions that concern me as much as the obvious dangers that exist all around us. Your dad means well and the more that you resist and get into the types of situations that you described, the more concerned your dad is going to be.

Yes, you are 15 and you expect greater freedom. But with freedom comes responsibility. Are you giving your dad reasons to trust you and not having to feel compelled to hover over you? If you are a mature girl and you have demonstrated with your behavior that you can handle situations then talk with your dad and be open with him. He is not your enemy. There are many of those out there and he is not one of them. If you exhibit immature behavior then there is no doubt as to why your dad is so protective.

I am not your dad and you are not my daughter but I can sense that your dad is doing a good job. If you are mature enough you will see it now. If not then you will see it in the years to come. Now, regardless of how hard this might be…go and give your dad a hug and tell him that you love him. Why? Because you do…teachccd
 
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