Submission as a wife

[Sailor_Kenshin]

I am the anti-feminist, and believe the sexes are quite different (though equal in dignity in the eyes of God).

But I do believe in a marriage you should play to your graces and charisms.

I can’t add. He can’t paint.

You know. Things like that.

 

[Wogglebug]

We are not slaves to the time in which we live, so the fact that times have changed really means nothing. The Bible was not printed with an expiration date. Families have been around for thousands and thousands of years.

Anyway, this question made me think of this. The family can be likened to a locomotive. In my mind, the man is the Engineer. He responsible for the mechanical operation of the train. He drives the train. He makes many of the practical decisions for the entire operation.

The woman is the Conductor. She is responsible for the safe operation of the train. She makes sure that everything is well in order and that the train is running smoothly. She assists the passengers with their needs. She also makes many of the practical decisions for the entire operation.

The children are the passengers.

The destination is Heaven.

(It’s kind of cheesy, I know, but it’s what I thought of.)

 

[jazzy_987]

We are not slaves to the time in which we live, so the fact that times have changed really means nothing. The Bible was not printed with an expiration date. Families have been around for thousands and thousands of years.

Anyway, this question made me think of this. The family can be likened to a locomotive. In my mind, the man is the Engineer. He responsible for the mechanical operation of the train. He drives the train. He makes many of the practical decisions for the entire operation.

The woman is the Conductor. She is responsible for the safe operation of the train. She makes sure that everything is well in order and that the train is running smoothly. She assists the passengers with their needs. She also makes many of the practical decisions for the entire operation.

The children are the passengers.

The destination is Heaven.

(It’s kind of cheesy, I know, but it’s what I thought of.)

Wow that’s a great way to put it too!!!

 

[historybrat]

I grew up in an extremely fundamental Baptist church. They would pull out the submission quote from St. Paul quite frequently to prove that women were inferior. In fact my aunt’s second husband physically and sexually abused her, and the pastor used this quote to try to get my aunt to go back to him. In response I became an extremely radical feminist and promised myself that if I ever got marry there would be no obey in my vows.

However, I mellowed with age and found the Catholic church. I read everything I could get my hands on, still do actually, and talked to lots of people. I was espically concerned about this quote because the Catholic church is fairly conservative and traditional, compared to what I was into before I converted. I meet a wonderful priest who pointed out that we commonly forget the second part, “…husbands love your wives as Christ loves his church” (sorry if its the not the exact phrasing, but I don’t have my bible in front of me). He went on to say if a husband loves his wife as Jesus loves his church, which means he would put her above everything else in the world, his love for her would have no end and could never be measured, and he would die protecting her from herself or others,then yes a woman should submit. I was never exposed to the second part and what it meant.

I hope someday to be married. And if my husband loves me like Jesus loves his church, then I will submit to him. Its not easy and the wording still makes me uncomfortable, but if he truly loves me then he will always have my best interest at heart, and would never purposely hurt me, put me in danger, or have me do something immoral. Of course he might make mistakes, so will I.

I will not ask him for permission to go out to lunch with friends, to have lunch with male co-workers, or whatever it might be. But common courtesy dictates I let him know what I’m doing, make sure he didn’t have other plans, and if he did try to find a compromise. The wording is uncomfortable for alot of women but please remember the whole quote. We are not slaves, and if done in a loving marriage, submitting to your husband would never result in slavery, or degradation (sp?) of any kind. Nor would it result in one spouse becoming the parent of the other.

Historybrat

 

[MrSteve]

I’m troubled that the “wives, submit to your husbands” Bible quote is always brought out in isolation, and that’s all that’s usually discussed. Depending on who is talking, it can sound like the husband can get away with simply having a romantic feeling while the wife has to follow his commands!

To me (and I am probably wrong), if we take the whole passage, it looks to me like:

1. Wives and husbands submit to each other (Eph 5:21)
   1a - here’s the particular way wives ought to submit their husbands
   1b - here’s the particular way husbands ought to submit to their wives

Interestingly, in Ephesians chapter 6 it outlines the conduct of slaves relative to their masters, and then tells the masters to do likewise to their slaves.

So if I’m Christ in my marriage and my wife is the Church, well, I start to think over what Jesus did for the Church. One thing that stands out to me is that he sacrificed himself. He allowed himself to be crucified. He bled, he suffered, and prayed for his enemies. He was the servant king.

Another marriage passage says that the wife’s and husband’s bodies belong to one another and neither should refuse the other.

As Christians, we’re to love each other as we love ourselves. We’re not to seek power for power’s sake, because the last shall be first and the first shall be last.

It really seems like marriage, being a vocation like the priesthood or religious live, involves a total self-giving on the part of both husband and wife. My wife must respect me, yes. I must respect her as well. Likewise, we are called to love, honor, and obey one another.

I’m no scripture scholar or theologian, so am I totally off my rocker here? To tie it back to the thread, maybe the Bible’s statements on marriage are neither out-dated nor sexist, but rather more fair-minded and current than they are given credit for.