T
ThisOne
Guest
It seems so simple, this problem I have, but I cannot get it right. When the day is done, I can pray and feel that I trust God completely, and that all somehow will be well.
But as I search for work, and I am an a dire state, and when I contemplate my life in general, which is not going well, I end up getting very upset and feeling very bad.
I am frustrated because I cannot find work in my field, and I may have to go to another city across the country to do so, and even then, it’s not a sure thing.
But instead of remembering what I know about God, I end up really crying and feeling miserable and self-pitying. And I don’t want to do this if I don’t have to.
I think that these feelings are normal, but I don’t know if I should be somehow praying while I look for work or something. It’s so painful, and getting upset makes it so hard to try to find work.
It’s such a simple thing, right, integrating our knowledge of God’s purpose into our lives? But why can’t I do it?
I’m relatively socially isolated, also, which doesn’t help, and my best friend seems to want to end the friendship, so I am feeling pretty low in general, but when I turn completely to God, I am calmed and I am peaceful.
How can I keep this throughout the harshness of my day, with its sadness and disappointment?
Any thoughts would be appreciated. Getting upset like I am today makes me feel reluctant to seek God’s solace, though, because I got it last night and I squandered it today, didn’t I? And last night I had an insight that I cannot now recall, and whatever it was, it didn’t help me during today, when I got progressively more and more upset as the day wore on.
I will not be able to make it if I cannot stay calm and not feel so sad and depressed and hopeless during the day. The idea of moving to another city is part of this, but whatever happens to me, I need peace and I want peace. I am tired of hurting so much.
But as I search for work, and I am an a dire state, and when I contemplate my life in general, which is not going well, I end up getting very upset and feeling very bad.
I am frustrated because I cannot find work in my field, and I may have to go to another city across the country to do so, and even then, it’s not a sure thing.
But instead of remembering what I know about God, I end up really crying and feeling miserable and self-pitying. And I don’t want to do this if I don’t have to.
I think that these feelings are normal, but I don’t know if I should be somehow praying while I look for work or something. It’s so painful, and getting upset makes it so hard to try to find work.
It’s such a simple thing, right, integrating our knowledge of God’s purpose into our lives? But why can’t I do it?
I’m relatively socially isolated, also, which doesn’t help, and my best friend seems to want to end the friendship, so I am feeling pretty low in general, but when I turn completely to God, I am calmed and I am peaceful.
How can I keep this throughout the harshness of my day, with its sadness and disappointment?
Any thoughts would be appreciated. Getting upset like I am today makes me feel reluctant to seek God’s solace, though, because I got it last night and I squandered it today, didn’t I? And last night I had an insight that I cannot now recall, and whatever it was, it didn’t help me during today, when I got progressively more and more upset as the day wore on.
I will not be able to make it if I cannot stay calm and not feel so sad and depressed and hopeless during the day. The idea of moving to another city is part of this, but whatever happens to me, I need peace and I want peace. I am tired of hurting so much.