Sudden Death of our 13 Year Old Daughter

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It sounds like you are doing fine. I truly can’t imagine how horrible this is. 😦 I would recommend a good book I read years ago Why Bad Things Happen to Good People. It’s written by a rabbi. He examines the Book of Job in the book quite a bit. He also lost a child, as I recall.

God didn’t take your child, I don’t think. I think we live in a world where bad stuff happens. It’s part of our existance here in a fallen world. It’s a mystery and it seems somewhat random in many ways. Why does evil and bad exist, I don’t know. Why did all those things happen to Job? The rabbi who wrote the book is very good.
MGEISING said:
I am speaking with a number of woman who have lost their children … I want to keep my pulse on my emotions … but what I get from them … I am grieving … in a healthy way …

It hasn’t even been six weeks yet … plus — we haven’t heard from the Medical Examiner yet - may be another 3 weeks; and we haven’t buried her yet … so we have a very long, sad road ahead of us …

I am a mom who is grieving one of the greatest gifts our Lord gave us … He took her from me … and I must try and understand … that is what I dont’ understand …

Love Moe
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JLSacred said:
It sounds like you are doing fine. I truly can’t imagine how horrible this is. 😦 I would recommend a good book I read years ago Why Bad Things Happen to Good People. It’s written by a rabbi. He examines the Book of Job in the book quite a bit. He also lost a child, as I recall.

God didn’t take your child, I don’t think. I think we live in a world where bad stuff happens. It’s part of our existance here in a fallen world. It’s a mystery and it seems somewhat random in many ways. Why does evil and bad exist, I don’t know. Why did all those things happen to Job? The rabbi who wrote the book is very good.
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Two weeks ago, someone who lives in our town … showed up … She gave us that book … Why Bad Things Happen to Good People. I have been reading it … along with a number of books …

We didn’t know this person, she did live in our ‘small’ town … and she said that she lost her daugher at 2 1/2 months to SIDS … she told me when she finally was able to go to work … someone said to her … what happened … she replied … and they said “WHAT A WASTE OF NINE MONTHS” …

God forgive them … for anytime without our children needs be thought of as a gift .

Thanks for your replys and I BEG you to keep us in your prayers!

Love Moe
 
Hi Moe,
Just visited the memorial site it is beautiful, I signed the guest book. You and your family are still in my prayers at daily Mass, I think of you so often during the day and how your heart must be broken… Are you talking to a grief counselor? when my SIL lost first her husband then her son she went to one it was her saving grace. You will just go through so many emotions that are so very normal and human and you can’t second guess yourself or feel guilty for them. If you can try to pray the Rosary, and if there is a church near you that has an Adoration Chapel maybe spend some time there, God knows how much you are hurting.
 
Nordar said:
Hi Moe,
Just visited the memorial site it is beautiful, I signed the guest book. You and your family are still in my prayers at daily Mass, I think of you so often during the day and how your heart must be broken… Are you talking to a grief counselor? when my SIL lost first her husband then her son she went to one it was her saving grace. You will just go through so many emotions that are so very normal and human and you can’t second guess yourself or feel guilty for them. If you can try to pray the Rosary, and if there is a church near you that has an Adoration Chapel maybe spend some time there, God knows how much you are hurting.
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I pray the Rosary every day … just because it gives me comfort …

I am not ready yet for a counsiler, but am blessed with a couple of woman who lost children 17 years ago … and that has been validating … I know that sounds liek a wierd word … but I get validated … knowing that my pain, fear, whatever, is normal.

Thanks.

Love Moe
 
No Validated is the perfect word, I am glad you have others to speak to and can validate what you are feeling. 🙂
 
MGEISING said:
It seems to me that it wouldn’t help me very much.
Are you attending Mass? I know that will help. How about working? Is that helping you at all?

Yes, we haven’t missed a Sunday - but it brings me much pain … because it was always the four of us in the bench together … holding hands, kissing, or hugging … and the music made me cry before this - never mind now that it is happening to us … I ball my eyes out at Mass … especially after receiving the Eucharists.
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Moe, do you realize that in the Holy Eucharist, as you are united to Jesus, you are also united to the entire Body of Christ. That would include those on Earth, (the Church Militant) those in Purgatory, (the Church Suffering) and those in Heaven (the Church Triumphant).

In essence, each time you receive the Eucharist, you are reunited with McKayla in the Lord.
 
yes, she is seeing a grieving counselor … thanks be to God … she is holding her own!
 
Siena said:
Moe, do you realize that in the Holy Eucharist, as you are united to Jesus, you are also united to the entire Body of Christ. That would include those on Earth, (the Church Militant) those in Purgatory, (the Church Suffering) and those in Heaven (the Church Triumphant).

In essence, each time you receive the Eucharist, you are reunited with McKayla in the Lord.
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What a beautiful insight. Thanks for sharing that!
 
Siena said:
Moe, do you realize that in the Holy Eucharist, as you are united to Jesus, you are also united to the entire Body of Christ. That would include those on Earth, (the Church Militant) those in Purgatory, (the Church Suffering) and those in Heaven (the Church Triumphant).

In essence, each time you receive the Eucharist, you are reunited with McKayla in the Lord.
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Thought of this while attending Mass today — and again … cried like a baby … what is wrong with me? what is wrong with my intellect … I know this is true what you say Siena … but my heart is just broken and missing her …
 
MGEISING said:
Thought of this while attending Mass today — and again … cried like a baby … what is wrong with me? what is wrong with my intellect … I know this is true what you say Siena … but my heart is just broken and missing her …
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I don’t think there is anything wrong with you. You just love your daughter and miss terribly. I think any mother or parent would. Give yourself time. You just need time. It is not an easy cross to bear; the loss of a child at any age. Jesus is holding you close to him.

Your family and you continue to be in our prayers. Don’t be so hard on yourself and remember we all go through the different stages of grief differently and some of us may be in one stage longer than another. We are all different and it will take time for you to go through all the stages.
 
There is nothing wrong with you. Rachel is allowed to weep for her children.

And what did Jesus tell the women of Jerusalem when he was going to his death? “Weep for yourselves and for your children.” And remember, “Jesus wept”, even when He was going to raise Lazarus from the dead almost right away. And don’t you think Mary was allowed to be sad when Jesus died, or even when she saw Him ascend into heaven and leave her here for a time?

There will be a time when you will feel more peace and joy than pain, but right now you’re not there yet. Offer up your suffering and mourning next to that of Jesus, and Mary, and the women of Jerusalem, and Lazarus’ sisters, and maybe eventually that will help.
 
MGEISING said:
Please, if you come upon this site … help us … either with messages, prayers, anything …
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Sweetheart, you and your family and your beautiful daughter have been in my prayers every day since I have heard about this. I promise I will continue to pray for you.
 
StratusRose said:
Wow…my heart just goes out to you. Your husband is brave and it shows that he is trying to make some good come from McKayla’s death. You are so blessed to have husband like him.
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Yes, I am blessed … he is just amazing … I will post another one tomorrow - he was also on (along with Mandy) our hometown news and they did a fabulous job …

Love Moe
 
Can you share with me - what you think heaven is like???

Possibly is her purpose in life over with …???

I am just confused 😦
 
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