Suicide Attempt

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jazzy0710

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Hey there,

i have and older Brother who I’d like people to pray for.

Unfortunately he doesn’t live near me. The fastest way for me to see him would be to fly the 7hrs and 42 mins.

He’s 34 yrs old and was recently diagnosed with ADHD. He doesn’t have a family doctor but sees usually the same doctor at a walk in clinic. This Doctor put him on"Vyvsalene" don’t know it I spelled it right.

Anway he’s been depressed, agitated, and has pushed most of his friends away.

Our Mom well he doesn’t have the best relationship with her. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that she’s got issues as well but she won’t get help because she’s in denial. She has always been very critical toward the both of us, but it’s been especially hard on him. He feels that she doesn’t love him and that he’ll never be good enough. Hehasn’t spoken to her since Xmas. He says that he sees so many of her traits in himself and it scares him.

I got a phone call at 4:30 this morning from a friend of his telling me he was at the Hospital because he swallowed a handful of his pills but puked them back up.

I called my Brother to let him know how much I love and miss him and that if he ever needed anything to never hesitate to ask me. He was very thankful that I called, but very mad at the friend for waking me up because he felt that it wasn’t necessary because he was fine. He also told me that he didn’t atcually swallow the pills, that he was going to, but came to his senses. I know he’s probably lying though because he doesn’t want me to worry.

He assured me that he was fine, that he was atcually getting ready to go to work. He also kept talking about coming here for a visit for a few days in the summer.

He told me not to tell my parents. I kind of want to but I know if I do that he’ll never trust me again and that he’ll completely isolate himself all together.

I’m worried that he might atcually do it again though and suceed.

Prayers and suicide prevention tips would be greatly apprechiated.Thanks.
 
I have a loved one with bipolar/schizophrenia and has attempted suicide 3 times and once ended in the ICU I was told by the ER doctor to say goodbye. its hard but you need to stay his loyal brother and friend. if he is an adult I don’t think you need to tell the parents. if you think they would help and not hurt then try to find a way for them to find out with you telling them. family members or friends or boss’s etc that don’t support recovery can really cause a lot of pain and suffering. it can be a wake up call to parents to have their child (adult or not) in the hospital for suicide attempt but you know your parents best do what you feel is right.

just fyi don’t know if that was a anti depressant he was on or not but antidepressants especially in young teens and adults can cause more suicide thoughts or attempts as a side affect.

he will need a strong family/friend support along with medical professinals and counselor. would he want to talk to a priest about it? it may help.

its helps if a family member or close friend who knows him very well can go (or conference call) to Doctor apts and help make important decisions about medications and past mental history. this person has to be very supportive of recovery etc and may be needed for a long time. they wont give out any info unless this person is his medical power of attorney or release form.

as for suicide prevention its best to keep him busy and his mind off his worries. do they have a two week out patient counseling (all day) at the hospital or town he is in? you can call the hospital there (your brother may have to sign a release for you to get info without power of attorney) and find out about out patient programs. this program will help him in every way possible and may find a life long counselor. also research as much as you can about all of it meds overdose, mental health and how to be good support for him.
 
I do not know what good would be accomplished by telling your parents. The influence they are likely to bring to bear isn’t likely to help things. Do keep in contact with your brother and let him know that you would be hurt by it if he were to commit suicide. When someone is very depressed, they can feel as if they wouldn’t be doing anything wrong by killing themselves, because no one still living would suffer any loss. Make sure he knows that this is not true in his case. Even a long distance away, having him there helps you in this world, and you need him alive. Sometimes knowing that will come to mind and tilt the decision towards life when “the decision” presents itself.
Rita77 said:
I have a loved one with bipolar/schizophrenia and has attempted suicide 3 times and once ended in the ICU I was told by the ER doctor to say goodbye. its hard but you need to stay his loyal brother and friend. if he is an adult I don’t think you need to tell the parents. if you think they would help and not hurt then try to find a way for them to find out with you telling them. family members or friends or boss’s etc that don’t support recovery can really cause a lot of pain and suffering.

just fyi don’t know if that was a anti depressant he was on or not but antidepressants especially in young teens and adults can cause more suicide thoughts or attempts as a side affect.

he will need a strong family/friend support along with medical professinals and counselor. would he want to talk to a priest about it? it may help.

its helps if a family member or close friend who knows him very well can go (or conference call) to Doctor apts and help make important decisions about medications and past mental history. this person has to be very supportive of recovery etc and may be needed for a long time. they wont give out any info unless this person is his medical power of attorney or release form.

as for suicide prevention its best to keep him busy and his mind off his worries. do they have a two week out patient counseling (all day) at the hospital or town he is in? you can call the hospital there (your brother may have to sign a release for you to get info without power of attorney) and find out about out patient programs. this program will help him in every way possible and may find a life long counselor. also research as much as you can about all of it meds overdose, mental health etc.
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Also, impress upon him that pills are not a “safe” means to attempt suicide. There isn’t one. There is nothing you can do to kill yourself that can’t make you much worse off if you try to kill yourself and do not die. An overdose can cause permanent brain and organ damage. Remind him that another health issue is the last thing he needs on his plate, and that suicide attempts can cause them.

There is a limit to what you can do, OP. Let him know he is loved, try to keep him oriented to the truth, but realize that there is a limit to how much you can do to reach in and change depression. Do what you can to be a positive influence, but accept ahead of time that the results are not in your hands.
 
Hail Mary… I will indeed pray for him, God bless you both
 
jazzy0710 said:
Hey there,

i have and older Brother who I’d like people to pray for.

Unfortunately he doesn’t live near me. The fastest way for me to see him would be to fly the 7hrs and 42 mins.

He’s 34 yrs old and was recently diagnosed with ADHD. He doesn’t have a family doctor but sees usually the same doctor at a walk in clinic. This Doctor put him on"Vyvsalene" don’t know it I spelled it right.

Anway he’s been depressed, agitated, and has pushed most of his friends away.

Our Mom well he doesn’t have the best relationship with her. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that she’s got issues as well but she won’t get help because she’s in denial. She has always been very critical toward the both of us, but it’s been especially hard on him. He feels that she doesn’t love him and that he’ll never be good enough. Hehasn’t spoken to her since Xmas. He says that he sees so many of her traits in himself and it scares him.

I got a phone call at 4:30 this morning from a friend of his telling me he was at the Hospital because he swallowed a handful of his pills but puked them back up.

I called my Brother to let him know how much I love and miss him and that if he ever needed anything to never hesitate to ask me. He was very thankful that I called, but very mad at the friend for waking me up because he felt that it wasn’t necessary because he was fine. He also told me that he didn’t atcually swallow the pills, that he was going to, but came to his senses. I know he’s probably lying though because he doesn’t want me to worry.

He assured me that he was fine, that he was atcually getting ready to go to work. He also kept talking about coming here for a visit for a few days in the summer.

He told me not to tell my parents. I kind of want to but I know if I do that he’ll never trust me again and that he’ll completely isolate himself all together.

I’m worried that he might atcually do it again though and suceed.

Prayers and suicide prevention tips would be greatly apprechiated.Thanks.
Click to expand...
Talk to a good priest.
 
jazzy0710 said:
Hey there,

i have and older Brother who I’d like people to pray for.

Unfortunately he doesn’t live near me. The fastest way for me to see him would be to fly the 7hrs and 42 mins.

He’s 34 yrs old and was recently diagnosed with ADHD. He doesn’t have a family doctor but sees usually the same doctor at a walk in clinic. This Doctor put him on"Vyvsalene" don’t know it I spelled it right.

Anway he’s been depressed, agitated, and has pushed most of his friends away.

Our Mom well he doesn’t have the best relationship with her. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that she’s got issues as well but she won’t get help because she’s in denial. She has always been very critical toward the both of us, but it’s been especially hard on him. He feels that she doesn’t love him and that he’ll never be good enough. Hehasn’t spoken to her since Xmas. He says that he sees so many of her traits in himself and it scares him.

I got a phone call at 4:30 this morning from a friend of his telling me he was at the Hospital because he swallowed a handful of his pills but puked them back up.

I called my Brother to let him know how much I love and miss him and that if he ever needed anything to never hesitate to ask me. He was very thankful that I called, but very mad at the friend for waking me up because he felt that it wasn’t necessary because he was fine. He also told me that he didn’t atcually swallow the pills, that he was going to, but came to his senses. I know he’s probably lying though because he doesn’t want me to worry.

He assured me that he was fine, that he was atcually getting ready to go to work. He also kept talking about coming here for a visit for a few days in the summer.

He told me not to tell my parents. I kind of want to but I know if I do that he’ll never trust me again and that he’ll completely isolate himself all together.

I’m worried that he might atcually do it again though and suceed.

Prayers and suicide prevention tips would be greatly apprechiated.Thanks.
Click to expand...
The medication you are thinking of may be Vyvanse or a generic of it. He needs to see his doctor immediately if he is having suicidal thoughts. I hope the hospital will send the record of his visit to his doctor who is treating the ADHD. Oh, dear, you said he is just being treated at a walk-in clinic…

😦 I hate it that doctors seem to hand out these medications like they are aspirin! :mad: He could not have been properly diagnosed by a doc in a box! It takes a history and preferably certain tests before ADHD can be diagnosed, let alone putting someone on stimulant or non-stimulant psychotropic medications!

What he needs is someone to follow his medical situation, and truly evaluate him for ADHD. Maybe this will have given him a wake up call…Unfortunately, other than urge him to get proper medical treatment, there’s not a whole lot you can do. Taking medications that don’t agree with one’s brain can cause suicide, it’s true. If it were me, yes, I would tell your parents. A live but angry brother is still better than a dead brother in a coffin. If they can impress him that he needs to see a proper doctor and get OFF of that medication, so much the better. Yes, it would be nice if they could do it kindly, but it’s rather an emergency. Your parents might be able to talk to the doctor who put him on the meds, too, where anyone else is not going to be able to. I know the HIPPA laws make this difficult but depending on where he lives, sometimes doctors do ignore them.

Do what you can to get him to seek better medical treatment. It’s possible he really has ADHD, but this medication just isn’t good for him. Or, he might not have it at all.

Here is a page that gives the side effects of Vyvanse. If he has agitation and anxiety, he could be on too high a dosage. But only a doctor or a psychiatrist can tell.

Vyvanse
 
Lord, may the OP’s brother find hope in You. Mary and angels come to his aid. Pray that You would give the doctor wisdom about his medication. Please care for him in a supernatural way, as he can’t care for himself.

Lord have mercy
Christ have mercy
Lord have mercy
 
Praying for you all.

I searched for advice on the topic of suicide prevention and found this article in Australia, which looks very good. I tried to search for the US as well, assuming you are there, but couldn’t find anything as well directed - but if you search from your own location you might get results closer to home.
 
I am sorry you are going through this. You may want to research narcissism as your mother sound as if she may be narcissistic. Children of narcissists often feel defeated depressed, guilty and hopeless. It may be impossible to keep from mother- but you may not want to tell her about brother, b/c she may cause more problems rather than help.
 
Rita77 said:
I have a loved one with bipolar/schizophrenia and has attempted suicide 3 times and once ended in the ICU I was told by the ER doctor to say goodbye. its hard but you need to stay his loyal brother and friend. if he is an adult I don’t think you need to tell the parents. if you think they would help and not hurt then try to find a way for them to find out with you telling them. family members or friends or boss’s etc that don’t support recovery can really cause a lot of pain and suffering. it can be a wake up call to parents to have their child (adult or not) in the hospital for suicide attempt but you know your parents best do what you feel is right.

just fyi don’t know if that was a anti depressant he was on or not but antidepressants especially in young teens and adults can cause more suicide thoughts or attempts as a side affect.

he will need a strong family/friend support along with medical professinals and counselor. would he want to talk to a priest about it? it may help.

its helps if a family member or close friend who knows him very well can go (or conference call) to Doctor apts and help make important decisions about medications and past mental history. this person has to be very supportive of recovery etc and may be needed for a long time. they wont give out any info unless this person is his medical power of attorney or release form.

as for suicide prevention its best to keep him busy and his mind off his worries. do they have a two week out patient counseling (all day) at the hospital or town he is in? you can call the hospital there (your brother may have to sign a release for you to get info without power of attorney) and find out about out patient programs. this program will help him in every way possible and may find a life long counselor. also research as much as you can about all of it meds overdose, mental health and how to be good support for him.
Click to expand...
Thanks very much for your reply. I am atcually his sister, I am female.

As I said, he has pushed most of his friends away. He really only has 1 left but both of them work very long hours.

He wouldn’t talk to a priest unfortunately because he’s homosexual.

He did take anti depressants in the past but stopped them. I don’t think that this current medication is antidepressants.

He also used to smoke marijuana everyday and recently stopped that as well.
 
EasterJoy said:
I do not know what good would be accomplished by telling your parents. The influence they are likely to bring to bear isn’t likely to help things. Do keep in contact with your brother and let him know that you would be hurt by it if he were to commit suicide. When someone is very depressed, they can feel as if they wouldn’t be doing anything wrong by killing themselves, because no one still living would suffer any loss. Make sure he knows that this is not true in his case. Even a long distance away, having him there helps you in this world, and you need him alive. Sometimes knowing that will come to mind and tilt the decision towards life when “the decision” presents itself.

Also, impress upon him that pills are not a “safe” means to attempt suicide. There isn’t one. There is nothing you can do to kill yourself that can’t make you much worse off if you try to kill yourself and do not die. An overdose can cause permanent brain and organ damage. Remind him that another health issue is the last thing he needs on his plate, and that suicide attempts can cause them.

There is a limit to what you can do, OP. Let him know he is loved, try to keep him oriented to the truth, but realize that there is a limit to how much you can do to reach in and change depression. Do what you can to be a positive influence, but accept ahead of time that the results are not in your hands.
Click to expand...
I send him text messages everyday to let him know how much I love and miss him and hope he’s having a great day.
 
bonvivantHermit said:
I am sorry you are going through this. You may want to research narcissism as your mother sound as if she may be narcissistic. Children of narcissists often feel defeated depressed, guilty and hopeless. It may be impossible to keep from mother- but you may not want to tell her about brother, b/c she may cause more problems rather than help.
Click to expand...
I have do doubt in my mind that my mother is narcissistic. I read the book “Will I ever be good enough” by Dr. Karyl McBride. I balled and balled. It described my Mom to a tea.
I most definitely will not tell her because it’ll make things worse. She would call him and scream at him, telling him she didn’t raise him like, hat, yadda yadda. Would make him feel even worse. I atcually see a Psychologist to learn how to deal with her. It’s been very helpful. My Brother sees one through his work but he his afraid to say anything really personal because he’s afraid it will affect his job.

I’m really not at all impressed with how the police handled the situation. His friend (who lives a short distance away) called 911. The cops showed up at his door. He didn’t let them in right away, and when he did open the door, they grabbed him, slammed him up against the wall and then slammed him into the ground and handcuffed him. Totally discusting and not neccessary.
 
jazzy0710 said:
Thanks very much for your reply. I am atcually his sister, I am female.

As I said, he has pushed most of his friends away. He really only has 1 left but both of them work very long hours.

He wouldn’t talk to a priest unfortunately because he’s homosexual.

He did take anti depressants in the past but stopped them. I don’t think that this current medication is antidepressants.

He also used to smoke marijuana everyday and recently stopped that as well.
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I am glad that your brother has stopped smoking marijuana. That alone may help his state of mind a lot.

The same sex attraction must be a very difficult and depressing burden to carry. Is he living that lifestyle? I hope not. Many, many gay men and lesbian women do commit suicide when they live the homosexual lifestyle. It is a painful way to live.

I will keep you and especially your brother in my prayers. If your mother is a narcissist then I rescind my previous advice to tell her about this event.
 
jazzy0710 said:
I’m really not at all impressed with how the police handled the situation. His friend (who lives a short distance away) called 911. The cops showed up at his door. He didn’t let them in right away, and when he did open the door, they grabbed him, slammed him up against the wall and then slammed him into the ground and handcuffed him. Totally discusting and not neccessary.
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Many police departments are getting more and more mental health calls and still don’t have a good protocol to help officers switch from “law enforcement mode” to “public protection” mode without putting themselves in undue danger.

Anything that makes friends, family members or the prospective victim hesitant to call for help when someone seems to be a real threat to themselves is cause for public concern. Police departments typically have a public laison who can be contacted about incidents such as this. Calls to the state and local suicide prevention programs at public health departments might help, too, as this incident may be something they will want to be aware of. Maybe there are protocols in place, and with reports like this they’ll know those protocols are not being followed.

IOW, if you have knowledge of a hazard to public welfare, tell someone in the public sector who you’d hope would want to know. Tell more than one somebody. They don’t always want to know, they can’t always do something to address the situation right away, but I think usually there is someone who wants to know and sometimes they can do something, if only they get the information they need. Realize that failures don’t get reported up the chain the way successes do, because that is human nature. Dare to hope. Make some phone calls.
 
Please also remember that the description you are getting of the police’s behavior may not be totally accurate.
 
JacarandaPurple said:
Please also remember that the description you are getting of the police’s behavior may not be totally accurate.
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At the very least, it is necessary to remember that potential suicide victims can also be very dangerous to the police, particularly if they get a call that a male victim is on the verge of suicide and information about the means the victim has chosen does not get to them. With young men, it can be guns–including fully automatic weapons–and police officers can get killed, too, and not just one of them. Moreover, posing as a potential suicide victim could be used to ambush police. They don’t have an excuse to go overboard, but they do have reason to be wary.
 
Just thought I’d give an update as to what is going on now.

he is doing very well. He is seeing the therapist regularly now and is getting his meds altered. He keeps himself busy with activities so he doesn’t get bored. He’s also planning a trip home in the summer to visit me 🙂 and he texts me twice a week to let me know how he’s doing and to see how i’m doing.
 
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