suicide

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CathyMary

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Am I wrong to think suicide is a cowards way out of life? God gave us so many avenues to follow. I have dealt with depression, and have prayed God to end my life or make the suffering stop, but never did I want to commit suicide. Some people have so much more than I do and have even more choices, suicide is just so wrong. You are hurting and giving pain to your loved ones not easing your pain. This is troubling to me.
 
I’ve had four friends commit suicide. I don’t know if coward is the right word. Courage is dependent on the situation and person, I believe. I believe suicide to be selfish, and a horrible sin of which I’m still confused if you can ever regain Heaven if you commit suicide.

Hmmm, i wouldn’t say your wrong out right, but put yourself in their shoes before Judging, which none of us are qualified to do. They don’t see other choices, they are lost and confused, hurt, angry, and ultimately depressed or sad beyond most Americans comprehension.

It is quite possible that they have a mental illness (not saying that all who commit suicide do but it is a possibility for some) even if temporarily. Of course, I’m not making excuses, but try loving, compassion and mercy before judging. Just a thought…
CathyMary said:
Am I wrong to think suicide is a cowards way out of life? God gave us so many avenues to follow. I have dealt with depression, and have prayed God to end my life or make the suffering stop, but never did I want to commit suicide. Some people have so much more than I do and have even more choices, suicide is just so wrong. You are hurting and giving pain to your loved ones not easing your pain. This is troubling to me.
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USMC_Convert said:
I’ve had four friends commit suicide. I don’t know if coward is the right word. Courage is dependent on the situation and person, I believe. I believe suicide to be selfish, and a horrible sin of which I’m still confused if you can ever regain Heaven if you commit suicide.

Hmmm, i wouldn’t say your wrong out right, but put yourself in their shoes before Judging, which none of us are qualified to do. They don’t see other choices, they are lost and confused, hurt, angry, and ultimately depressed or sad beyond most Americans comprehension.

It is quite possible that they have a mental illness (not saying that all who commit suicide do but it is a possibility for some) even if temporarily. Of course, I’m not making excuses, but try loving, compassion and mercy before judging. Just a thought…
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Suicide is against God?
 
IMHO, suicide is not cowardly but rather the ultimate expression in taking control of your life.

:twocents:
 
My grandmother committed suicide when my mother was 5 years old. That was a family wound that never healed.

My closest friends husband, who was also a friend of mine, committed suicide shortly after they divorced. She and the children have never truly healed.

Seeing the aftermath of suicide played out in my family and my oldest and closest friends family, I could easily think that suicide is selfish and cowardly, but I don’t. I think suicide is simply what happens when a person is so mentally and spiritually broken they literally don’t have the ability to survive in the world. That simple. That complex. That heartbreakingly sad.
 
I wouldn’t use the word ‘coward.’ In many cases, I think it is a desperate cry for help…for someone to find them and see, really see, what is going on. Robin Williams’ death has me thinking of my cousin - my hero - who committed suicide 3 years ago. I believe that he wanted someone to find him and stop him, but I can’t really know that.

Suicide is the desperate action by someone who can’t find another way to assuage his/her pain. My research said that people with mental illness/diminished capacity are not necessarily culpable for their actions. Here’s an interesting discussion on another thread: forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=585285

At the end of it all, only God knows why and He will be the judge of us all. :hug3:
 
CathyMary said:
Am I wrong to think suicide is a cowards way out of life? God gave us so many avenues to follow. I have dealt with depression, and have prayed God to end my life or make the suffering stop, but never did I want to commit suicide. Some people have so much more than I do and have even more choices, suicide is just so wrong. You are hurting and giving pain to your loved ones not easing your pain. This is troubling to me.
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Suicide is an inherently selfish act because it leaves family and friends grieving, but I do not think people who are trying to commit suicide or have committed suicide are necessarily trying to be selfish. Some people do suffer from mental diseases (eg. depression, schizophrenia etc.), they can’t just snap out of it.

Please if you see someone with red flags, do try to get them help but do not minimize their pain by asking them to snap out of it. I’m sure it is something they would do if they could.
 
It’s been a long time since I was suicidal, but I remember thinking, very sincerely, that I was completely unloved and unlovable, and that I would be doing a favor for the people I loved by ceasing to be a burden on them. I did not think I would be missed. I thought people would be happy that I was gone. If you’ve never been in that place it’s hard to understand it, but it’s a mental reality for many people.
 
Many people who commit suicide are mentally ill and therefore not responsible for their actions.

We hope and pray that God will have mercy on these tortured souls.

In my extended family there are 3 people who committed suicide that I pray for (when I think of it).

Peace,
John Marie Philomena
 
CathyMary said:
Am I wrong to think suicide is a cowards way out of life? God gave us so many avenues to follow. I have dealt with depression, and have prayed God to end my life or make the suffering stop, but never did I want to commit suicide. Some people have so much more than I do and have even more choices, suicide is just so wrong. You are hurting and giving pain to your loved ones not easing your pain. This is troubling to me.
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I would not call it a cowards way out. It might be in some cases, as one trying to escape responsibility for a crime. But, most people who have become so severely depressed as to consider this may not be accountable for their actions at all. There are too many biochemical imbalances for them to think clearly.

I do believe that some are simply trying to stop the pain they fell, more than they are trying to die. In many cases the person really thinks someone will find them in time, but that does not happen. People who are suicidal are generally pretty desperate, and none of us can know why they have reached that state.

Let’s also remember that there are medications, even anti-depressants, that trigger suicidal thoughts and increase the risk. We simply don’t have very sound ways of treating the problem. So judging others as being cowardly is just not the answer.
 
Cricket2 said:
I would not call it a cowards way out. It might be in some cases, as one trying to escape responsibility for a crime. But, most people who have become so severely depressed as to consider this may not be accountable for their actions at all. There are too many biochemical imbalances for them to think clearly.

I do believe that some are simply trying to stop the pain they fell, more than they are trying to die. In many cases the person really thinks someone will find them in time, but that does not happen. People who are suicidal are generally pretty desperate, and none of us can know why they have reached that state.

Let’s also remember that there are medications, even anti-depressants, that trigger suicidal thoughts and increase the risk. We simply don’t have very sound ways of treating the problem. So judging others as being cowardly is just not the answer.
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Well stated. Only God know what is in their hearts & minds in the moment of the act.
 
Although, selfish, I believe a form of mental illness is usually involved. I think this likely tends to downgrade the sin from mortal because that person isn’t really in charge and able to think rationally anymore.
 
Yes, suicide is a crime, sin against God. And against your family and friends and co workers, and anyone who has even casual contact with you.

But having been in a situation where I thought seriously about doing it, planning for it, preparing for it, I would say that suicide is a survival strategy.

I say that because those who manage it are trying to make the pain go away. That’s all.
It’s a last ditch effort to cure oneself when nothing else on earth can.
And frankly, it takes tremendous courage. Almost as much courage as living through the pain.

Strangely enough, when I was mourning my beloved 6 year old daughter, the fact that I had a way to make the pain stop was the only thing that gave me the courage to go on for another five minutes. Or another hour, or on a good day, another day. Feeling the pain became a choice, something I had control over when I had control over nothing else in my life, including my emotions.

But I will also say, that once your life gets you to that place, it’s forever easier to go back there. It’s not so scary to think about it seriously any more if you’ve been in that position before. Friends and family beware. Don’t ignore even the silliest of jokes. Don’t walk away at even the slightest of hurts.
Life got better, and I regained some happiness, but that black hole is a possibility forever.
 
I guess it depends on the individuals definition of coward. If by that you mean lack of courage then I am on the side of the OP. It seems as though one no longer has the courage to face what is troubling them. So they simply leave.

I make no moral judgement of the individual who commits suicide. That is between that person and God. I’m sure there are mental health issues to take into consideration and I’m sure that He will.

On one hand a person may think that it is hard and therefore courageous to take ones life. My stand is that it is more courageous to get the help you need and take on your troubles in this life just like our good Lord would, I believe, have it.
 
I sought help al over the place.
But there is no help for a dead child…
 
DOJ96 said:
I wouldn’t use the word ‘coward.’ In many cases, I think it is a desperate cry for help…for someone to find them and see, really see, what is going on. Robin Williams’ death has me thinking of my cousin - my hero - who committed suicide 3 years ago. I believe that he wanted someone to find him and stop him, but I can’t really know that.

Suicide is the desperate action by someone who can’t find another way to assuage his/her pain. My research said that people with mental illness/diminished capacity are not necessarily culpable for their actions. Here’s an interesting discussion on another thread: forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=585285

At the end of it all, only God knows why and He will be the judge of us all. :hug3:
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I’ve always thought of myself as too much of a coward to commit suicide.

So sorry to hear about your cousin, my condolences and prayers. Many cases are cries for help, others are absolute commitments to going through with it. For example, among teenagers girls are far more likely to make suicidal gestures/attempts and comments, boys are much more likely to go through with it and less likely to exhibit warning signs.

The most shook-up I saw someone while in the Navy was a person who witnessed a suicide driving in on their way to work. They couldn’t get past the way the person stopped their car and then simply walked off the side of a bridge, no pause, no hesitation, no looking around, no opportunity to even yell stop, much less talk them out of it.
 
I don’t think it’s a coward’s way out at all. Sometimes, medications contribute to a depressed state of mind. Sometimes, the resources are just not available to help, or not available at the time the person seeks help. Small rural communities don’t always have resources to help with this kind of thing. I know of people whose grown children committed suicide because they had extreme physical pain (illness or accident) that was not managed by pain medication and which interfered with sleep (the lack of sleep itself would diminish your mental state). Sometimes, the person just does not see any other options and the people around them are uncaring - what if your spouse said to you “I can’t stand your depression” instead of asking you what was wrong or trying to help you at all?
Sometimes, there are subtle suicides, but suicide nonetheless like my uncle who was 89 and in the hospital. He had fallen and seriously broken his leg and was facing a lengthy rehabilitation. He did not believe he would ever be able to walk or move like he did before, already had trouble hearing even with a hearing aid and seeing clearly, so he couldn’t even enjoy tv. His wife, my aunt, had alzheimer’s and had been in a facility for quite a few years and that depressed him too. He had also a car accident about 6 months prior to the injuring the leg. So, for him, things just built up and he just couldn’t deal with it. So, he refused to eat or drink anything and in effect, committed suicide by doing so.
 
Taking one’s own life does not require any courage at all.

Staying alive, and LIVING, while enduring suffering and pain, and overcoming that
pain is what life is all about.
 
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