Suicide

[johannahw]

I recently (over the past weekend) went through a really bad patch where I was tempted to commit suicide. I have had Type I Bipolar Disorder for over 30 years and still it is not under good control even though I’m really good about taking my medications on a daily basis. I’m doing a lot better this morning. I was able to walk for 30 minutes and even was able to shower and brush my teeth. Even something as simple and basic as brushing my teeth is so very difficult when I am deeply depressed. I just absolutely care about nothing. I reached out to other catholics on a Back Fence over the weekend and feel I’m alive this morning only because of their care and numberless prayers for me.
I’m a convert to Catholicism and believe suicide is a sin but that is often not enough to deter me. I have attempted suicide and failed before. My question is this: What will happen to me if I am ever successful? Does God’s mercy cover self-murder when mental illness is clearly involved?
Thanks in advance for your answers.
Johannah

 

[jrabs]

You will find quite a lot of us care. I will keep you in my prayers.

I cannot answer your question but I can offer my support through prayers and encouragement. You are a wonderful child of God and a great addition to our Catholic Ans. Forum ( as well as the exercise clubhouse.).

Exercise is not the end all answer to everything, however it does help in alleviating the stress of daily life. Keep up your good work and while you are walking, pray even if only the single phrase, “Jesus I love you.”

 

[bilop]

Johannah w

May God Bless you in your illness and give you the strength to perservere. I will say a prayer for you.

No one can answer your question about God’s mercy and its limits. Since we can not know, we can not presume His Mercy.
Act as if suicide were a mortal sin.

As the previous poster said, you are a precious child of God. Many people care about you. More importantly He cares, the Blessed Mother cares. Pray for Their help.

Again, May God Bless You.

 

[Verisimilitude]

My question is this: What will happen to me if I am ever successful? Does God’s mercy cover self-murder when mental illness is clearly involved?
Thanks in advance for your answers.
Johannah

You have the clarity to ask the question which speaks volumes. Your life is not your own. Others share it with you to include everyone who reads your message here, much less than those who know and love you in person.

I am going to close my office door right now, and pray that you stop trying to justify an unjustified act.

 

[Ramalama]

I can’t answer your question, John, but I promise my wife and I will be praying for you. God bless you.

 

[rpp]

My prayers are with you, johannahw.

Here is what the Catechism has to say on suicide. Note the paragraph I bolded in paragraph 2282.

http://www.kofc.org/images/1px_transparent.gif

PART 3, SECTION 2 2, CHAPTER 2 2, ARTICLE 5, SUBSECTION 1, HEADING 6
**Suicide **

2280 Everyone is responsible for his life before God who has given it to him. It is God who remains the sovereign Master of life. We are obliged to accept life gratefully and preserve it for his honor and the salvation of our souls. We are stewards, not owners, of the life God has entrusted to us. It is not ours to dispose of.

2281 Suicide contradicts the natural inclination of the human being to preserve and perpetuate his life. It is gravely contrary to the just love of self. It likewise offends love of neighbor because it unjustly breaks the ties of solidarity with family, nation, and other human societies to which we continue to have obligations. Suicide is contrary to love for the living God.

2282 If suicide is committed with the intention of setting an example, especially to the young, it also takes on the gravity of scandal. Voluntary co-operation in suicide is contrary to the moral law.

** Grave psychological disturbances, anguish, or grave fear of hardship, suffering, or torture can diminish the responsibility of the one committing suicide.**

2283 We should not despair of the eternal salvation of persons who have taken their own lives. By ways known to him alone, God can provide the opportunity for salutary repentance. The Church prays for persons who have taken their own lives.

 

[gell]

My question is this: What will happen to me if I am ever successful? Does God’s mercy cover self-murder when mental illness is clearly involved?
Thanks in advance for your answers.
Johannah

The response with the quote from the CCC answers that.

Remember however, that suicide is completely irreversible. You can’t go to confession once you have done it…

You have a heavy burden, but remember that God’s grace is sufficient to carry any burden that is placed on you. Resist temptation and you will bring great glory to God.

I like this quote from St Faustina’s diary:
“Oh if only the suffering soul knew how much it is loved by God, it would die of joy and excess of happiness! Some day, we will know the value of suffering, but then we will no longer be able to suffer.”

 

[Holly3278]

Don’t feel bad. I have borderline personality disorder which is similar to bipolar disorder except worse as the mood swings are much more frequent. I have been frequently suicidal and have attempted suicide many times in the past. I have also simply attempted to harm myself by cutting myself. I know how the bad mood swings can be. Lets look at the Catechism:

2282 If suicide is committed with the intention of setting an example, especially to the young, it also takes on the gravity of scandal. Voluntary co-operation in suicide is contrary to the moral law.

Grave psychological disturbances, anguish, or grave fear of hardship, suffering, or torture can diminish the responsibility of the one committing suicide.

As you can see, grave psychological disturbances can diminish the responsibility of the one committing suicide. You can make what you will of this. Committing suicide is still a grave sin even if there are grave psychological disturbances involved.

 

[Greg27]

Catholic teaching and Christian teaching generally is that life is a precious gift from life itself, God’s Being. Suicide is contrary to the just love of ourself and our own being and existence and also goes against the love God has for us by bringing us into existence and sustaining us in existence.

Having suffered depression myself, the best way to try and handle it is to try and find someone who is compassionate and understanding and who will offer unconditional love and support. (A Catholic who offered this to me during a very dark time after breaking up with a g/f played a key role in converting to a Church I otherwise would not have contemplated joining). Also helping others with this condition also helps one cope as well. Killing yourself will only bring heartbreak and great suffering to those that love you, and God may well bring you to account for it. We must persevere, even in very dark times.

 

[HenryV]

Talk to your doc or get a second opinion on the treatment.

Get a regular confessor and spiritual advisor.

Confide in the Sacred and divine Heart of Jesus.

Keep close to Mary who is the comforter of the afflicted and the refuge of sinners.

 

[Tweety]

I recently (over the past weekend) went through a really bad patch where I was tempted to commit suicide. I have had Type I Bipolar Disorder for over 30 years and still it is not under good control even though I’m really good about taking my medications on a daily basis. I’m doing a lot better this morning. I was able to walk for 30 minutes and even was able to shower and brush my teeth. Even something as simple and basic as brushing my teeth is so very difficult when I am deeply depressed. I just absolutely care about nothing. I reached out to other catholics on a Back Fence over the weekend and feel I’m alive this morning only because of their care and numberless prayers for me.
I’m a convert to Catholicism and believe suicide is a sin but that is often not enough to deter me. I have attempted suicide and failed before. My question is this: What will happen to me if I am ever successful? Does God’s mercy cover self-murder when mental illness is clearly involved?
Thanks in advance for your answers.
Johannah

Johannah,

PLEASE, PLEASE DON’T. MY FATHER DID 2 YEARS AGO, this past Sunday 10 June.

I know you are going through hell, i have had depression before, but since his suicide i have it so often and care very little about things these days…not like before…

Many priests have told me that God understood my father’s anguish and pain… i believe he is forgiven, but that doesn’t mean that you should do the same…

My heart and prayers are with you.

Tweety

 

[johannahw]

Thank you all so much for your answers and support. I AM feeling better this week. Felt really good on Monday and Tuesday. Experiencing a little anxiety today. Am holding on to Jesus’ hand.
Johannah

 

[bilop]

Very Good to hear.

God Bless

 

[Tweety]

Ditto!

Keep holding onto Jesus’ hand - get a nice tight grip and don’t let go!!

You are in my prayers…

Tweety

 

[Mirror_Mirror]

Thank you all so much for your answers and support. I AM feeling better this week. Felt really good on Monday and Tuesday. Experiencing a little anxiety today. Am holding on to Jesus’ hand.
Johannah

Johannah,

You know that we are still praying for you. You are such a dear and having seen your posts in the Back Fence, I know the progress that you are making and know that we still are there for you and are so proud of you for even the littlest of task that you have accomplished.

God bless you. Squeeze Jesus’ hand once for me!!

 

[patrickmwebb]

I recently (over the past weekend) went through a really bad patch where I was tempted to commit suicide. I have had Type I Bipolar Disorder for over 30 years and still it is not under good control even though I’m really good about taking my medications on a daily basis. I’m doing a lot better this morning. I was able to walk for 30 minutes and even was able to shower and brush my teeth. Even something as simple and basic as brushing my teeth is so very difficult when I am deeply depressed. I just absolutely care about nothing. I reached out to other catholics on a Back Fence over the weekend and feel I’m alive this morning only because of their care and numberless prayers for me.
I’m a convert to Catholicism and believe suicide is a sin but that is often not enough to deter me. I have attempted suicide and failed before. My question is this: What will happen to me if I am ever successful? Does God’s mercy cover self-murder when mental illness is clearly involved?
Thanks in advance for your answers.
Johannah

Johannah please don’t even think that way, even though your pain and misery is unbearable. because you can’t begin to know the pain and suffering you leave behind. Two of my Children committed Suicide eight years ago Danny was 23 and Gillian was 17 it has a knock on affect my family have been in hell since, every time one of them gets stress I panic I have twelve Children. nine girls three boys, they all went wild after that. Ireland has the highest suicides in Europe. in the last three weeks three kids have killed themselves a 14year old girl a 17 year old girl and a young man all within a couple of miles of each other. And each time it opens the wounds up and tears the inside out of me. So I’m asking you to offer your suffering up as a prayer for all the young kids that are being destroyed by Drugs and materialism and the loss of respect for each other if you want a purpose to your life, please make this it.
Johannah I will keep you in my prayers from now on.
God bless, and if there is any thing I can do or if you gust need to talk, don’t hesitate to get in touch.

May God bless y ou and keep you safe.
Matt.

 

[baltobetsy]

Johannah please don’t even think that way, even though your pain and misery is unbearable. because you can’t begin to know the pain and suffering you leave behind. Two of my Children committed Suicide eight years ago Danny was 23 and Gillian was 17 it has a knock on affect my family have been in hell since, every time one of them gets stress I panic I have twelve Children. nine girls three boys, they all went wild after that. Ireland has the highest suicides in Europe. in the last three weeks three kids have killed themselves a 14year old girl a 17 year old girl and a young man all within a couple of miles of each other. And each time it opens the wounds up and tears the inside out of me. So I’m asking you to offer your suffering up as a prayer for all the young kids that are being destroyed by Drugs and materialism and the loss of respect for each other if you want a purpose to your life, please make this it.
Johannah I will keep you in my prayers from now on.
God bless, and if there is any thing I can do or if you gust need to talk, don’t hesitate to get in touch.

May God bless y ou and keep you safe.
Matt.

Matt, welcome to the forums. I’m so sorry to hear of your family’s suffering.

Just a note - this thread is from a long time ago, and you will probably not receive an answer from Johannah. You may want to take a look at the dates before you reply to the threads you read. Forum rules encourage us to begin new threads instead of replying to old ones, as the original posters may no longer be participating here.

God bless you for your concern. I look forward to seeing more of you!

Betsy

 

[blessedtoo]

Johannah please don’t even think that way, even though your pain and misery is unbearable. because you can’t begin to know the pain and suffering you leave behind. Two of my Children committed Suicide eight years ago Danny was 23 and Gillian was 17 it has a knock on affect my family have been in hell since, every time one of them gets stress I panic I have twelve Children. nine girls three boys, they all went wild after that. Ireland has the highest suicides in Europe. in the last three weeks three kids have killed themselves a 14year old girl a 17 year old girl and a young man all within a couple of miles of each other. And each time it opens the wounds up and tears the inside out of me. So I’m asking you to offer your suffering up as a prayer for all the young kids that are being destroyed by Drugs and materialism and the loss of respect for each other if you want a purpose to your life, please make this it.
Johannah I will keep you in my prayers from now on.
God bless, and if there is any thing I can do or if you gust need to talk, don’t hesitate to get in touch.

May God bless y ou and keep you safe.
Matt.

Oh Patrick, your post has touched me so deeply. I can’t begin to imagine your torment. I hope that you have received some help to deal with this unthinkable tragedy.

I will keep you in my prayers tonight, dear friend. May God bring you and your family some peace.

 

[newbetx]

I can’t tell you what has happened with Johannahw but we appreciate your concern. This is a very old thread. She was having some trouble with her medication about this time and was very troubled.

Matt. I am sorry for your troubles. Depression can be very difficult to manage. We’ve been fortunate so far in our family. I pray that your suffering will not linger and God provides some form of relief.

Johannah was doing well the last we heard but she and her husband did not have a lot of money. They may have dropped internet service to save money and that is why we have not heard from her in a while. We all hope she is well and pray for her. I’m sure she would appreciate the concern and prayers but she hasn’t been on CAF in almost a year.

 

[ATBAC]

It just so happened that yesterday I watched the Dr. Phil show and the subject whas suicide, here is the page Johannah if you want to take a look, it really gave me a little more of an insight since I am also a suicide attempt survivor, I should have died but I don’t know what Happened, because what I used I heard on tv killed 4 people. Your phases are not continuous thank you Jesus, so there is hope and you should keep it in perspective. In my case I was just severely wracked for a good 10 months, I didn’t go to the Dr. didn’t detox the poison, so it went through my system and really messed me up. I just prayed for about 12 month I think and little by little I came back to a full strength. Right now I think about it but in passive manner realizing I could have turned into a vegetable for what I have ingested. It was back in 99. I am just so Greatful that God spared my health and gave it back to me, because before I was extremely in good shape physically and like you said, my disorder got the upper hand, I do have the BP one too along with PTSD. I do intend on checking out the Dr. Phil spoken about episode, I think it can give me more insight, and here it is if you want it, there is a hotline if you need to call at any time 24/7

drphil.com/shows/show/1145

In the show they said 89 people comit a suicide every day, so you ar not alone in this brother, hang in there, take it day by day, be nice and affectionate with yourself, you are worthy of being loved and cared for. Do not ever forget that. If you need to talk, pm I would love to talk. But hang in there, you really can do it, trust me, if I am still here after that “over the cliff” act so to speak, trust me, you can surmount this. And we will help you. God Bless.