Supplemental Income - Belongs to the Family or the Spouse?

[pensmama87]

I’m curious how other families handle this when it comes up. If you or your spouse earns extra money, does that money belong to the person who earned it to spend as he or she pleases, or does it go into the household budget? (Or something else, decided on a case by case basis, maybe?)

Here’s the background: I earn some extra money, not from a regular job, but from things like online surveys, research studies, cash back for online shopping, etc. The amount is not great but it’s not nothing either - around $200-$300 a year if I do well. I have always put that money right into the household budget as supplemental income. I don’t spend it on myself (though our household budget does make room for “pocket money” for each spouse to spend on whatever we want).

My husband also earns some extra money from blogging and one long-term research study he’s been involved with since he was a kid. He feels that the money is his. He earns significantly more than I do this way - up to $1000 a year sometimes. He spends it like he would his budgeted pocket money, though sometimes he will spend some of it on things for the family (eating out, for example, or as extra money for gifts). But those things he views as “treats,” not part of our overall income and not an obligation on his part.

He and I disagree about what we should do with this money. We are agreed that we can spend gift money however we choose (such as for birthdays), but IMO this is money that we earn by spending our time on it, so it counts as “work” even if it’s not a “job.”

We are on a tight budget and have a significant amount of debt we are paying off. If we didn’t have the debt and had more breathing room just from our income, it wouldn’t bother me nearly as much. But there are some months that if it wasn’t for that little bit extra I am bringing in, we’d be in the red. I probably wouldn’t even do several things if I didn’t feel they were financially necessary for us to get by.

So I’m curious to see how other families handle this - would the money be yours to spend how you please? How do you account for the time that endeavors like that might take away from your family in addition to a paying job?

 

[slh3016]

I’m curious how other families handle this when it comes up. If you or your spouse earns extra money, does that money belong to the person who earned it to spend as he or she pleases, or does it go into the household budget? (Or something else, decided on a case by case basis, maybe?)

Here’s the background: I earn some extra money, not from a regular job, but from things like online surveys, research studies, cash back for online shopping, etc. The amount is not great but it’s not nothing either - around $200-$300 a year if I do well. I have always put that money right into the household budget as supplemental income. I don’t spend it on myself (though our household budget does make room for “pocket money” for each spouse to spend on whatever we want).

My husband also earns some extra money from blogging and one long-term research study he’s been involved with since he was a kid. He feels that the money is his. He earns significantly more than I do this way - up to $1000 a year sometimes. He spends it like he would his budgeted pocket money, though sometimes he will spend some of it on things for the family (eating out, for example, or as extra money for gifts). But those things he views as “treats,” not part of our overall income and not an obligation on his part.

He and I disagree about what we should do with this money. We are agreed that we can spend gift money however we choose (such as for birthdays), but IMO this is money that we earn by spending our time on it, so it counts as “work” even if it’s not a “job.”

We are on a tight budget and have a significant amount of debt we are paying off. If we didn’t have the debt and had more breathing room just from our income, it wouldn’t bother me nearly as much. But there are some months that if it wasn’t for that little bit extra I am bringing in, we’d be in the red. I probably wouldn’t even do several things if I didn’t feel they were financially necessary for us to get by.

So I’m curious to see how other families handle this - would the money be yours to spend how you please? How do you account for the time that endeavors like that might take away from your family in addition to a paying job?

Honestly, I think both of you should pitch whatever extra income you get toward paying off that debt, no matter what amount. Once that debt is gone, you’ll feel a lot less anxiety and freedom. Do you have a game plan to get it eliminated?

 

[pensmama87]

Honestly, I think both of you should pitch whatever extra income you get toward paying off that debt, no matter what amount. Once that debt is gone, you’ll feel a lot less anxiety and freedom. Do you have a game plan to get it eliminated?

Yes, we’re on the Dave Ramsey plan. So that’s basically what happens to my extra income - it gets put onto the “debt snowball” line. I used to be able to make much bigger snowball payments when I was babysitting extra children, but I currently don’t have any and won’t be taking any more on for a while as I’m having a baby in early fall.

Our budget is trimmed basically as much as we can handle. Our “pocket money” IS limited, but I felt like it would be impossible if we didn’t have $20 each to blow on lunch once a month or a drink with friends (not the case for me at the moment, obviously ). I do coupon and our grocery budget is as small as I can get it - $100/week for all food and household items (toiletries, medicine). I can’t see how to cut the budget more, so the best way to attack the debt is to increase our income. So it does make me frustrated that here is some extra money that could make a bit of a dent for debt, but my husband says it’s his to spend as he wishes.

 

[BlueEyedLady]

We NEVER throw extra money into the household budget! That $1000 is found money, and we would enjoy it. If it were a large inheritance or tax teturn we would throw it towards something, save, or invest it, but you’re only talking $80 or so a month.

But, neither one of us would just pocket it either. I make extra money doing freelance editing when I can and I see that as an opportunity for us to have some unplanned fun together. We go out to a new restaurant or pick up a nice bottle of liquor. I couldn’t imagine telling him that’s off limits for me to spend on whatever I want-that’s just not how our marriage works. But, we also make it a point to budget for bigger things that we each want. It’s a give and take and it will all even out over the course of our lives anyway.

 

[slh3016]

Yes, we’re on the Dave Ramsey plan. So that’s basically what happens to my extra income - it gets put onto the “debt snowball” line. I used to be able to make much bigger snowball payments when I was babysitting extra children, but I currently don’t have any and won’t be taking any more on for a while as I’m having a baby in early fall.

Our budget is trimmed basically as much as we can handle. Our “pocket money” IS limited, but I felt like it would be impossible if we didn’t have $20 each to blow on lunch once a month or a drink with friends (not the case for me at the moment, obviously ). I do coupon and our grocery budget is as small as I can get it - $100/week for all food and household items (toiletries, medicine). I can’t see how to cut the budget more, so the best way to attack the debt is to increase our income. So it does make me frustrated that here is some extra money that could make a bit of a dent for debt, but my husband says it’s his to spend as he wishes.

Here’s what I think is fair:

Whatever, you make “extra” goes toward the debt snowball. Your husband should contribute that same amount toward the debt snowball. Then, whatever is left over from his money should be split between the two of you.

The thing to remember is that, as a married couple, you are ONE. There is no mine or yours. It should always be OURS. Your husband sounds like he may need to be reminded of this.

 

[BlueEyedLady]

Yes, we’re on the Dave Ramsey plan. So that’s basically what happens to my extra income - it gets put onto the “debt snowball” line. I used to be able to make much bigger snowball payments when I was babysitting extra children, but I currently don’t have any and won’t be taking any more on for a while as I’m having a baby in early fall.

Our budget is trimmed basically as much as we can handle. Our “pocket money” IS limited, but I felt like it would be impossible if we didn’t have $20 each to blow on lunch once a month or a drink with friends (not the case for me at the moment, obviously ). I do coupon and our grocery budget is as small as I can get it - $100/week for all food and household items (toiletries, medicine). I can’t see how to cut the budget more, so the best way to attack the debt is to increase our income. So it does make me frustrated that here is some extra money that could make a bit of a dent for debt, but my husband says it’s his to spend as he wishes.

Ok, never mind my previous advice, I didn’t know that you were aggressively paying off debt. I still don’t believe that anything is the marriage is ever “mine” or “yours”, so why not ask him for a compromise? It sounds like you are both making a lot of sacrifices, and he’s working hard, so start off by telling him that you recognize that and you appreciate it. Then tell him how much your debt worries you and how you feel the pinch of your sacrifices too. Then see if he’ll agree to put 30% or 50% of it towards debt. Or, maybe he’d agree to using it as fun money, but on fun that you can both enjoy? Or maybe even another system that you guys come up with? I just think that the last thing you want to have happen is that he feels under appreciated or feels resentful that he doesn’t get to enjoy anything after working extra hours. $80/month just isn’t worth a fight or marital stress, especially right before a new baby

EDIT: I love the idea that the poster above me had too! Looks like there are lots of ways you can both bend on this one.

 

[Xantippe]

I’m curious how other families handle this when it comes up. If you or your spouse earns extra money, does that money belong to the person who earned it to spend as he or she pleases, or does it go into the household budget? (Or something else, decided on a case by case basis, maybe?)

Here’s the background: I earn some extra money, not from a regular job, but from things like online surveys, research studies, cash back for online shopping, etc. The amount is not great but it’s not nothing either - around $200-$300 a year if I do well. I have always put that money right into the household budget as supplemental income. I don’t spend it on myself (though our household budget does make room for “pocket money” for each spouse to spend on whatever we want).

My husband also earns some extra money from blogging and one long-term research study he’s been involved with since he was a kid. He feels that the money is his. He earns significantly more than I do this way - up to $1000 a year sometimes. He spends it like he would his budgeted pocket money, though sometimes he will spend some of it on things for the family (eating out, for example, or as extra money for gifts). But those things he views as “treats,” not part of our overall income and not an obligation on his part.

He and I disagree about what we should do with this money. We are agreed that we can spend gift money however we choose (such as for birthdays), but IMO this is money that we earn by spending our time on it, so it counts as “work” even if it’s not a “job.”

We are on a tight budget and have a significant amount of debt we are paying off. If we didn’t have the debt and had more breathing room just from our income, it wouldn’t bother me nearly as much. But there are some months that if it wasn’t for that little bit extra I am bringing in, we’d be in the red. I probably wouldn’t even do several things if I didn’t feel they were financially necessary for us to get by.

So I’m curious to see how other families handle this - would the money be yours to spend how you please? How do you account for the time that endeavors like that might take away from your family in addition to a paying job?

When I’ve made “extra money” (and it’s never been a lot), it’s always been put right back into general budget.

I know when my mom used to substitute teach, she would consider her entire earnings for the day hers to spend, which would drive my dad absolutely wild, as the taxes still needed to be paid on her earnings.

I wonder if it wouldn’t be helpful to point out to your husband when you run short? “I wanted to buy some of the nicer XYZ you like [cheese, bread, ketchup, ice cream, whatever], but I was short of grocery money, so I bought the cheaper kind.” Let him figure out whether the decrease in standard of living is worth it to him. But that won’t work if you’re already buying the cheaper XYZ.

What is your timeline for finishing the debt repayment?

 

[EasterJoy]

We NEVER throw extra money into the household budget! That $1000 is found money, and we would enjoy it. If it were a large inheritance or tax teturn we would throw it towards something, save, or invest it, but you’re only talking $80 or so a month.

But, neither one of us would just pocket it either. I make extra money doing freelance editing when I can and I see that as an opportunity for us to have some unplanned fun together. We go out to a new restaurant or pick up a nice bottle of liquor. I couldn’t imagine telling him that’s off limits for me to spend on whatever I want-that’s just not how our marriage works. But, we also make it a point to budget for bigger things that we each want. It’s a give and take and it will all even out over the course of our lives anyway.

I have never understood the concept of “found money.” Money is money. It all spends the same. That $80 a month adds up!

Having said that, the main thing is that a) the spouses have a concept of money that reckons well with reality (that is, they spend what they have and don’t spend what they don’t and won’t ever have) and b) that the spouses agree on how money decisions are made.

For instance, maybe one of the things that the spouses agree on is the concept of “found” money. Well, that is all well and good, as long as you don’t conveniently forget the “lost” money of unpaid debt or unforeseen expenses that is also a couple’s reality.

Were I to propose a compromise, OP, I’d propose that you agree on a split between how much of the income you cannot count on will go to pay down debt, how much will go towards discretionary spending, and how it will be divided. For instance, if you make $80 a month, maybe $40 goes to spend down the debt, $20 goes into your slush fund–the only discretionary money you get until those cards are paid off–and $20 goes to your husband’s slush fund, the slush funds being the money you have agreed you can spend without a joint consultation about it. The main thing, though, is that you and your husband know the financial rules of engagement and that you’re both at peace with it. It doesn’t have to be “fair” to anyone but the two of you.

 

[Lorelei12]

On the rare occasion that I have earned a little extra, I’ve asked my husband what he thought we should do with it (because I see all of our money as “ours”, no matter where it came from, except for gifts). He always tells me to keep it for myself. I’m not talking about anything significant- maybe $50 here and there a few times throughout the year. I sometimes will use it on things I wouldn’t normally buy like a nicer brand of shampoo, some lunch out, a book, or something, but other times I’ll just pay for groceries or household items with it.

Neither one of us really splurges and he is very reasonable about budgeting- we don’t really have a set spending amount per person every month, we just trust each other and I handle the finances anyway.

In your case it seems really unfair that your husband takes time away that he could be spending with the kids or helping you out to earn money that he claims as his. He could at least split it with you.

 

[Jon_S_1]

I’m curious how other families handle this when it comes up. If you or your spouse earns extra money, does that money belong to the person who earned it to spend as he or she pleases, or does it go into the household budget? (Or something else, decided on a case by case basis, maybe?)

Here’s the background: I earn some extra money, not from a regular job, but from things like online surveys, research studies, cash back for online shopping, etc. The amount is not great but it’s not nothing either - around $200-$300 a year if I do well. I have always put that money right into the household budget as supplemental income. I don’t spend it on myself (though our household budget does make room for “pocket money” for each spouse to spend on whatever we want).

My husband also earns some extra money from blogging and one long-term research study he’s been involved with since he was a kid. He feels that the money is his. He earns significantly more than I do this way - up to $1000 a year sometimes. He spends it like he would his budgeted pocket money, though sometimes he will spend some of it on things for the family (eating out, for example, or as extra money for gifts). But those things he views as “treats,” not part of our overall income and not an obligation on his part.

He and I disagree about what we should do with this money. We are agreed that we can spend gift money however we choose (such as for birthdays), but IMO this is money that we earn by spending our time on it, so it counts as “work” even if it’s not a “job.”

We are on a tight budget and have a significant amount of debt we are paying off. If we didn’t have the debt and had more breathing room just from our income, it wouldn’t bother me nearly as much. But there are some months that if it wasn’t for that little bit extra I am bringing in, we’d be in the red. I probably wouldn’t even do several things if I didn’t feel they were financially necessary for us to get by.

So I’m curious to see how other families handle this - would the money be yours to spend how you please? How do you account for the time that endeavors like that might take away from your family in addition to a paying job?

Anything we make went into the family account. I would recommend you guys do the same. But if your husband is adamant I say you should keep your few hundred dollars too (and maybe find ways to make it a couple grand and then see how he feels about it!)

 

[Xantippe]

In your case it seems really unfair that your husband takes time away that he could be spending with the kids or helping you out to earn money that he claims as his. He could at least split it with you.

Yeah.

 

[Kelfa28]

For the entirety of our marriage, I’ve only made about $200 a month from military drill…plus or minus a few hundred here and there due to maternity leave and annual training or make up drills.
I’ve never treated it as “my” money. It’s our money and it’s used directly in the household budget.
However, our finances were really tight for awhile and any income was used to pay bills or contribute to the mortgage and we had no wiggle room.

Now we have some wiggle room but we are using that money to go directly into savings and investments.

What can I say…my husband is a finance major and is in charge of our budget and family finances. He is good at it.
I ask him if there is any room for me to make a purchase…like a new pair of sandals.

Personally, I believe any money earned should contribute to the family budget and treats should be discussed and agreed upon.
Even if it’s just as simple as “honey, I’m going out shopping with the girls…I plan on using a little over one hundred today for new shoes and lunch.”

 

[Xantippe]

For the entirety of our marriage, I’ve only made about $200 a month from military drill…plus or minus a few hundred here and there due to maternity leave and annual training or make up drills.
I’ve never treated it as “my” money. It’s our money and it’s used directly in the household budget.
However, our finances were really tight for awhile and any income was used to pay bills or contribute to the mortgage and we had no wiggle room.

Now we have some wiggle room but we are using that money to go directly into savings and investments.

What can I say…my husband is a finance major and is in charge of our budget and family finances. He is good at it.
I ask him if there is any room for me to make a purchase…like a new pair of sandals.

Personally, I believe any money earned should contribute to the family budget and treats should be discussed and agreed upon.
Even if it’s just as simple as “honey, I’m going out shopping with the girls…I plan on using a little over one hundred today for new shoes and lunch.”

One way to do this is to have budgeted “fun money” or “blow money” that doesn’t have to be discussed once it’s allotted. For instance, at our house (depending on how the monthly budget meeting shakes out), it tends to be somewhere between $30 and $50 a month for each of us. My husband has a tendency to save his and get something BIG. I usually run through mine pretty fast on magazines, books, and various small goodies. When I was expecting our youngest, though, I was motivated, and there was a time where I socked away everything for months and then bought an embarrassingly expensive stroller.

 

[Mintaka]

Traditionally, married women have had “pin money” to pay for their own expenses and small fun things. Sometimes this has been money from the household budget assigned to her, and often money she made has been treated in whole or part as extra “pin money.” In this day and age, probably both men and women have a chance to make extra money on the side, and they probably both want to have “pin money” for their own expenses and fun. That is how this started.

If both people are making ever-varying amounts of extra money, probably the amount paid into the joint kitty vs the amount kept as pin money should be proportional.

But that wasn’t agreed ahead of time, and yet the wife’s pin money is consistently getting used for household expenses and not her own, whereas the husband’s pin money is going to him only.

Well, why? Because the wife is paying.

BUT that isn’t the real problem! The real problem is that both of you are doing stinky budgeting, if you’re always having emergency bills come up! That’s the thing that you both need to fix, because normal budgeting needs to include what to do about emergencies.

What you the OP need to do is to itemize how much money you’ve paid into household expenses, each time you’ve had to use your pin money to keep the family afloat (at least for the last twelve months), and to show which months you’ve had to do it.

Then hold a family meeting, and show that obviously the main money supply isn’t sufficient, which means the main money supply isn’t being saved for a rainy day, either. What can you both do to cut costs so that the family meets the budget? How can you both set up an emergency fund?

Or if it is more a cashflow problem right before payday, what can you both do about that? Should you call your credit card company, utility company, phone company, etc. and move some payment dates to different times of the month? (You can do that with most companies, since it’s pretty easy with a computer, but you can usually only do it once every twelve months. So be sure you’ve picked a good date.)

Don’t mention the fact that you’re paying extra money and he’s not. Let him realize that. But do itemize your contribution and show it to him. Hard math facts are a zillion times better than nagging or complaining. It makes it a practical problem that your husband can see.

If you two can find a better way, you are golden, and the pin money for both of you will be freed up. You won’t have to worry. Otherwise, you guys will probably both have to form an emergency fund using a proportion of both your pin money.

OTOH, if you solve the problem and then find that it really is more that he’s making more pin money than you, I don’t really know what to do about it. Maybe think about what you can do to make more money.

Also, it’s totally traditional for both spouses to be able to go separately for “lunch with the girls” or “a night out with the guys.” That’s what clubs and sports teams and such are for. As my mom used to say when we were kids, sometimes you need to get out of each other’s hair. She used to go to sorority alumnae meetings, and he used to go to Civil War Roundtable or to my brothers’ Boy Scout leader planning meetings. When we kids were old enough, we also went to our own club meetings. Other times, they went to stuff together, or we all went as a family.

It doesn’t have to be expensive to be fun, and to get people out of the house. Lots of fun things are free. Go to free museums or to free events out in the country. Stop at historical markers along the road.

 

[alphawoman]

Everything earned in our family goes into general coffers and is allocated on a prioritized basis with the good of the overall family as the guiding objective.

 

[agnes_therese]

Yes, we’re on the Dave Ramsey plan.

Then you must know what Dave would say. Once you’re married, it’s not “yours” and “mine,” it’s “ours.” That goes for debt AND money.

 

[808Catholic]

I’m curious how other families handle this when it comes up. If you or your spouse earns extra money, does that money belong to the person who earned it to spend as he or she pleases, or does it go into the household budget? (Or something else, decided on a case by case basis, maybe?)

Here’s the background: I earn some extra money, not from a regular job, but from things like online surveys, research studies, cash back for online shopping, etc. The amount is not great but it’s not nothing either - around $200-$300 a year if I do well. I have always put that money right into the household budget as supplemental income. I don’t spend it on myself (though our household budget does make room for “pocket money” for each spouse to spend on whatever we want).

My husband also earns some extra money from blogging and one long-term research study he’s been involved with since he was a kid. He feels that the money is his. He earns significantly more than I do this way - up to $1000 a year sometimes. He spends it like he would his budgeted pocket money, though sometimes he will spend some of it on things for the family (eating out, for example, or as extra money for gifts). But those things he views as “treats,” not part of our overall income and not an obligation on his part.

He and I disagree about what we should do with this money. We are agreed that we can spend gift money however we choose (such as for birthdays), but IMO this is money that we earn by spending our time on it, so it counts as “work” even if it’s not a “job.”

We are on a tight budget and have a significant amount of debt we are paying off. If we didn’t have the debt and had more breathing room just from our income, it wouldn’t bother me nearly as much. But there are some months that if it wasn’t for that little bit extra I am bringing in, we’d be in the red. I probably wouldn’t even do several things if I didn’t feel they were financially necessary for us to get by.

So I’m curious to see how other families handle this - would the money be yours to spend how you please? How do you account for the time that endeavors like that might take away from your family in addition to a paying job?

My wife and I have a joint banking account and all property are in a trust of which we are both named trustees. We don’t “own” personal property; all assets are property of the marriage. Hope this helps.

 

[pensmama87]

Traditionally, married women have had “pin money” to pay for their own expenses and small fun things. Sometimes this has been money from the household budget assigned to her, and often money she made has been treated in whole or part as extra “pin money.” In this day and age, probably both men and women have a chance to make extra money on the side, and they probably both want to have “pin money” for their own expenses and fun. That is how this started.

If both people are making ever-varying amounts of extra money, probably the amount paid into the joint kitty vs the amount kept as pin money should be proportional.

But that wasn’t agreed ahead of time, and yet the wife’s pin money is consistently getting used for household expenses and not her own, whereas the husband’s pin money is going to him only.

Well, why? Because the wife is paying.

BUT that isn’t the real problem! The real problem is that both of you are doing stinky budgeting, if you’re always having emergency bills come up! That’s the thing that you both need to fix, because normal budgeting needs to include what to do about emergencies.

What you the OP need to do is to itemize how much money you’ve paid into household expenses, each time you’ve had to use your pin money to keep the family afloat (at least for the last twelve months), and to show which months you’ve had to do it.

Then hold a family meeting, and show that obviously the main money supply isn’t sufficient, which means the main money supply isn’t being saved for a rainy day, either. What can you both do to cut costs so that the family meets the budget? How can you both set up an emergency fund?

Or if it is more a cashflow problem right before payday, what can you both do about that? Should you call your credit card company, utility company, phone company, etc. and move some payment dates to different times of the month? (You can do that with most companies, since it’s pretty easy with a computer, but you can usually only do it once every twelve months. So be sure you’ve picked a good date.)

Don’t mention the fact that you’re paying extra money and he’s not. Let him realize that. But do itemize your contribution and show it to him. Hard math facts are a zillion times better than nagging or complaining. It makes it a practical problem that your husband can see.

If you two can find a better way, you are golden, and the pin money for both of you will be freed up. You won’t have to worry. Otherwise, you guys will probably both have to form an emergency fund using a proportion of both your pin money.

OTOH, if you solve the problem and then find that it really is more that he’s making more pin money than you, I don’t really know what to do about it. Maybe think about what you can do to make more money.

Also, it’s totally traditional for both spouses to be able to go separately for “lunch with the girls” or “a night out with the guys.” That’s what clubs and sports teams and such are for. As my mom used to say when we were kids, sometimes you need to get out of each other’s hair. She used to go to sorority alumnae meetings, and he used to go to Civil War Roundtable or to my brothers’ Boy Scout leader planning meetings. When we kids were old enough, we also went to our own club meetings. Other times, they went to stuff together, or we all went as a family.

It doesn’t have to be expensive to be fun, and to get people out of the house. Lots of fun things are free. Go to free museums or to free events out in the country. Stop at historical markers along the road.

Thank you, but almost none of this advice is helpful.

I do have sink funds. The months that are short I contribute less to the sink funds and pray that our furnace lasts a bit longer.

Almost all our fun activities are free or purchased at a severe discount.

I definitely agree that the best thing to do is increase our income. Hence why I do these supplemental activities in the first place. My understanding was never that this was to be our “pin money” - if it was, why would we allocate any in the budget to begin with?

He knows the math. He put together the formulas on the spreadsheet. He knows the income and the expenses. So I don’t know what else to do.

 

[pensmama87]

Then you must know what Dave would say. Once you’re married, it’s not “yours” and “mine,” it’s “ours.” That goes for debt AND money.

I agree. My husband obviously doesn’t, so what then?

 

[pensmama87]

One way to do this is to have budgeted “fun money” or “blow money” that doesn’t have to be discussed once it’s allotted. For instance, at our house (depending on how the monthly budget meeting shakes out), it tends to be somewhere between $30 and $50 a month for each of us. My husband has a tendency to save his and get something BIG. I usually run through mine pretty fast on magazines, books, and various small goodies. When I was expecting our youngest, though, I was motivated, and there was a time where I socked away everything for months and then bought an embarrassingly expensive stroller.

That’s what we do.

(Sorry I’m posting these replies separately - I’m on my phone so not as easy to multi-quote. And before anyone gets on me for having a phone, I didn’t for about two years until I switched plans last month so DH and I pay $45/month for 2 smartphones instead of $70 for 1 smartphone and one dumb.)