You see my point – but you don’t address my point.
I’m the parent – I control if and when my children eat junk. Or don’t eat junk. It’s my responsibility. That’s every parents’ responsibility. I’m fully aware of the machinations of the advertisers! I know what is advertised! (I also know that BOTH sides of most of these issues use the press and the advertisers to target children, and that’s part of my point as well.)
But again . . . THAT’S NOT THE ISSUE!
To me, the point is this: when, and to what extent, to the CHILDREN make major life decisions! And again, this does not necessarily have to do with food choices, though this is the example currently under discussion. My minor children don’t make those choices – their parents do – my wife and myself. Do I allow choices, within appropriate controls and circumstances? Of course I do! “Kids, you have to choose a vegetable this evening. Do you want salad or green beans?” That is an appropriate “kid’s choice”. My 16-year-old chose to give up flesh meat for Lent. She consulted with me – and I joined her in that discipline. I also made sure that she had enough alternate protein in her diet. My parental choice; my parental responsibility.
But for a 12 to 14 year-old to unilaterally decide on a lifestyle decision of this nature (and again, vegetarianism is NOT the issue here – just the topic for discussion) and for the mother to (apparently) unilaterally concede, is problematic and troublesome to me.
I’m in Religious Education. I’m responsible for the Christian Formation of 500 children, ages 5-17. All too often, I see parents say, with regard to Religious Education, EXACTLY what this mother is saying about her pre-teen daughter. “Well, I just can’t get them to go to Mass.” “Well, I just can’t get them to go to Religious Education.” “Well, I can’t make them get up for church.” (Of course, the kids manage to get up for school or sports!)
Yes, I know that the analogy is not perfect, and I’m not trying to equate a dinner-table rebellion with refusal to attend Mass.
But what I AM saying, is that, in my personal opinion as the father of 8 – AND in my professional opinion as a religious educator – is that this is not the sort of major life decision that a pre-teen can – or should – make unilaterally, and then expect Mom to immediately accede. As the adult, those are the decisions that God has called THE PARENT to make. If the girl wants to make such a decision when she is of age and on her own . . . well God bless her and go in peace! Until that point – the parent is responsible.
And again, I ask the question: What are the influences causing the girl to move in this direction? Have these been explored? Is this a real concern for health and for the well-being of animals? Is it a PETA protest, throwing blood on the Oscar-Meyer Wiener-mobile? (An extreme example, I know – but you get my point.)
I’m still hoping that you (or someone) will address my real concern (which again, has little to do with vegetarianism) and everything to do with the role of parents in the lives of their children.
