Swearing?

[brendenseth]

I sometime use language that’s colorful, I was raised around it all the time. I was wondering what peoples thoughts were on it? I never say the Lords name in vain, but are swear words really that bad? It was man made so I don’t see that it is. Also I’ve had a ton of speech problems as a result of a car accident, and swear words come out really easy. That was one thing my therapists told me anyway. Do I really need to keep going to confession about it? I try my best to stop but in a situation or an argument like with my wife for example they just seem to fly out.

 

[Mary_Estelle]

I think swearing denotes anger, frustration, a lack of control…or all of these. Sure, you can cuss, fuss and fume in colorful langue, but how does that change anything? The one thing it can do is alienate friends, family and fellow workers because it makes them uncomfortable. As for your therapist, I think he is legitimizing the problem rather than helping to eliminate it. One thing you can do is to substitute one foul word for another. Instead “Oh s…t” you can say oh spit or something similar . Most bad langue is bad habits rather than medical or physical. There are exceptions and you may be one…I don’t know so in this case I pray that you can resolve this and find peace.

 

[James214]

I know exactly what you mean by “fly out.” I can have a particularly colorful tongue at times even though I do my utmost to be respectful and I wouldn’t consider foul words to be much of a part of my natural vocabulary. I’m a former soldier and cussing was something that everybody just did in that environment, so much so that it gets ingrained in you, so I probably won’t ever completely rid myself of that habit. I also am very turned off when I’m with others that are casually crude in their everyday speech, so I understand that it’s not something I should do. When I’m making a confession I always include it but I’ve never gone to confession just for that.

Do you need to go to confession? If we’re talking profanity (usually describing body parts or functions) rather than blasphemy or irreverence, it depends on the context whether it’s objectively mortal sin. See Michelle Arnold’s response: forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=14494 Obviously the weight of it being a bad habit might mitigate culpability, I would be most concerned that you mentioned doing it in arguments with your wife, and if you’re being deliberately crude, or hurting her feelings, or calling her certain names, that could cross into the territory of grave matter. Otherwise, it might just be rude, and you can be rude without intending to offend. You can’t sin on accident.

In any event, praying for you, and I agree with Mary’s suggestion. Find a substitute word and try to consciously use that in place of actual profanity. Maybe a nonsense word or something harmless (Just say “Bubbles” in as angry voice as you can!) Robbin Williams gave us “Shazzbot,” I worked once with someone who used that fake expletive if he dropped something, it was certainly easier on our customers’ ears if there were any around. That might help train you out of the habit a bit.

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