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mommyof4
Guest
Does anyone have any suggestions on how to stop swearing? I hate it when the occasional word slips out, but I would really like to stope even the “slips of the tounge.”
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deb1
Guest
I may be sexiest but for some reason when I hear females cursing it always sounds worse and more vulgar then when men curse.
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BLB_Oregon
Guest
As I said, those words do get into your brain in a different way than other words, so it takes extraordinary self-control to not use them at all, and that is if you even get into the habit of thinking them.
I’ve found that it helps to either have something else ready to say or to get into the habit of purposely not saying anything. For instance, when I had kids, my standard refrain in traffic, replacing short commentaries on the intelligence of other drivers, became “Hey, be careful, Sir! That was NOT SAFE!”
You’d be surprised what you can learn after a few years of “living under surveillance”. Still, I let a few choice words today after a big and inopportune spill in my kitchen. I was lucky that the kids were out of earshot!
J
jmcrae
Guest
Probably because in so many cases (not all, of course) male and female brains are wired differently.
A lot of women are wired visually, so when they hear a swear word, they’re “seeing” the action or the substance that the word refers to, in their mind’s “eye.”
A lot of men are more audio-oriented, so they hear the explosive sound of the word, but they don’t immediately connect it with a disgusting image in the mind - to a lot of men, the “point” of swearing is to make an angry sound - and a lot of men are even unaware of the totally disgusting images that they are evoking in the minds of so many women, when they swear.
When women swear, the intent is to reproduce that viscerally disgusting experience that so many women have when they hear swear words being used. That’s why, when women swear, it so often sounds so much worse than when men do - because they are succeeding in communicating the same experience that they so often have, themselves, when someone swears at them.
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Neo_Canaan
Guest
YUP!! My family uses devil talk A LOT, and i try to get them not to use it. So far, my nephew started using it. I feel like i lost my family to Satan!!
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JesuXPIPassio
Guest
Try conditioning – doing something that’s unpleasant for every time you swear. Like, put a rubber band on your wrist and snap it every time you swear. Then maybe you could go to the next step and snap it every time you think about swearing. Then when you’ve nailed that down, snap it every time you think something negative about someone.
Or, you could get a money jar and every time something slips out, drop in a couple bucks. In the end, for the hard work you’ve done, you could use the money accumulated to buy a little reward for yourself.
Here’s an idea – if you do that, make the reward something you’d keep on you constantly. A wristwatch, a piece of jewelry, something like that. That way, you’d have a constant reminder on you.
S
Steve_O_Brien
Guest
My understanding is that it is a venial sin. Here’s some good scriptures on it:
Luke Chapter 6:45
A good person out of the store of goodness in his heart produces good, but an evil person out of a store of evil produces evil; for from the fullness of the heart the mouth speaks.
Ephesians Chapter 4:29
No foul language should come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for needed edification, that it may impart grace to those who hear.
Ephesians Chapter 5:4
no obscenity or silly or suggestive talk, which is out of place, but instead, thanksgiving.
James Chapter 3:10
From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. This need not be so, my brothers.
…and my favorite, now tell me why would you want this to apply to you?
2nd Timothy Chapter 2:16
Avoid profane, idle talk, for such people will become more and more godless,
God bless you!
I respectfully disagree. The use of vulgar words is not a sin. It doesn’t even fall into the category of a moral issue. That’s why it’s not addressed in the Catechism of the Catholic Church.
One’s speech patterns are matters of personality and the situation. If a guy feels comfortable using profane expletives, including the universal Anglo-Saxon term for fornication, around other guys–say, on a baseball diamond, in a locker room, or in a barracks–it’s unjustifiable and positively wrong for a committed Catholic or another Christian to tell him that this is even a venial sin.
The Scripture verses that Kevin cites don’t address the issue, and I question the translation that he uses. If you check the Revised Standard Version, you’ll see that the more superficially relevant verses do not address the issue of vulgar vocabulary but something else.
*Eph *4:29-30 does not denounce the expletives with which many guys choose to pepper their conversation for rhetorical and emotional effect, or simply out of conformity to male bonding. Instead, Paul’s real target in this passage is the “evil talk” of “anger,” “slander,” and “malice,” all of which are sins.
In *Eph *5:3-4, the objects of Paul’s condemnation are kinds of talk that involve sinful conduct beyond mere speech, e.g., “silly talk” that implies sinful neglect of one’s duty. It would be wrong, for instance, for a bunch of guys to shoot the breeze for hours, with or without profanity, while watching NFL games, if they’re spending so much time in recreation and conversation that they’re abandoning their obligations as husbands and fathers. And “filthiness” in the true sense–language used to approve or facilitate seduction or other sexual sins–is obviously a sin.
In *Jas *3:10, “cursing” does not mean the failure to exclude vulgar words from our speech patterns, but rather the acts of nurturing hatred against our neighbor and wishing him or her evil.
In *2 Tim *2:14-18, Paul is not concerned about expletives, but about the danger of spreading heresy through irresponsible and harmful talk on religious topics–a danger exemplified by Hymenaeus and Philetus, who denied the doctrine of the resurrection.
Bottom line: it’s unnecessary, confusing, and harmful for Christians to make an issue of speech patterns when no sin is involved. In what document of the Catholic Church has the use of vulgar words ever been called a moral issue?
Keep and spread the Faith.
M
McKevin
Guest
Mr. O’Brien, I hope you find these counterpoints helpful and enlightening. By the way, you are not going to find a list of all the sins in the Catechism of the Catholic Church. Also, the scriptures that I listed are from the official Catholic Bible as defined by the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops. 
Hear the words of Jesus
“But to you who hear I say, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,
bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” (Luke 6:27, 28)
When one curses, one is betraying Christ, just as St. Peter did when he cursed and betrayed Christ. Notice that Peter “began to curse and swear” in his attempt to prove to the bystanders that he was not a follower of Christ:
Matthew 26:73-75
A little later the bystanders came over and said to Peter, “Surely you too are one of them; even your speech gives you away.”
At that he began to curse and to swear, “I do not know the man.” And immediately a cock crowed.
Then Peter remembered the word that Jesus had spoken: “Before the cock crows you will deny me three times.” He went out and began to weep bitterly.
God bless you,
Hear the words of Jesus
“But to you who hear I say, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,
bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” (Luke 6:27, 28)
When one curses, one is betraying Christ, just as St. Peter did when he cursed and betrayed Christ. Notice that Peter “began to curse and swear” in his attempt to prove to the bystanders that he was not a follower of Christ:
Matthew 26:73-75
A little later the bystanders came over and said to Peter, “Surely you too are one of them; even your speech gives you away.”
At that he began to curse and to swear, “I do not know the man.” And immediately a cock crowed.
Then Peter remembered the word that Jesus had spoken: “Before the cock crows you will deny me three times.” He went out and began to weep bitterly.
God bless you,
S
Steve_O_Brien
Guest
Mr. O’Brien, I hope you find these counterpoints helpful and enlightening. By the way, you are not going to find a list of all the sins in the Catechism of the Catholic Church. Also, the scriptures that I listed are from the official Catholic Bible as defined by the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops.
Hear the words of Jesus
“But to you who hear I say, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,
bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” (Luke 6:27, 28)
When one curses, one is betraying Christ, just as St. Peter did when he cursed and betrayed Christ. Notice that Peter “began to curse and swear” in his attempt to prove to the bystanders that he was not a follower of Christ:
Matthew 26:73-75
A little later the bystanders came over and said to Peter, “Surely you too are one of them; even your speech gives you away.”
At that he began to curse and to swear, “I do not know the man.” And immediately a cock crowed.
Then Peter remembered the word that Jesus had spoken: “Before the cock crows you will deny me three times.” He went out and began to weep bitterly.
God bless you,
McKevin, “to curse and to swear” in Mt 26:74 does not mean the use of vulgar words referring to bodily functions (in English, “four-letter words”), but rather the use of words in which someone wishes someone else evil, or affirms the truth of a lie.
In the 1949 Baltimore Catechism No. 3, cursing is correctly defined in question 232 as “the calling down of some evil on a person, place, or thing.”
The widespread use of “curse” and “swear” in the sense of locker room or barracks language is a linguistic mistake.
The reason why the new catechism does not address the issue of vulgar language is that the Church knows that this is not a moral issue.
I say this with great respect: there are too many real sins, and too many serious sins, for Christians to waste precious time on matters that are not ethical or religious issues at all. And let’s not alienate young people, especially young men, from the Faith by telling them that there is sin where there is no sin. It’s hard enough for them, and their elders, to keep the actual commandments.
Our society has people whose speech may be as vulgarity-free as that of a nun, but whose actions are grievously evil. I’m referring, for example, to those who promote murder: the murder of the unborn, the medically disabled, and, in military situations, non-combatants. Let’s train our artillery on those offenders, not on people who aren’t bothered by profane language.
Keep and spread the Faith.
E
Exalt
Guest
I completely, totally, and aboslutely agree. This has to be the best post on the subject I’ve read so far.
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McKevin
Guest
Mr. O’Brien,
It is ethical and it is clearly religious, in a verse from Matthew 12 Jesus said that “out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks”…
Justifications for cursing/swearing/cussing/talking dirty drown the faith which is centered in a converted heart with relativism and watered down Christianity. We cannot change the scriptures or misinterpet them just because we think they may offend or allienate people. The Word of God is a gift to us that calls us to change and live holy (or set-apart) lives for Christ. If someone loves Jesus and if that someone is serving God then why would they resort to using obscenities in the first place? This would not come from their lips. Scripture is clear. The most dangerous thing that we can teach young people is that a sin is not a sin.
Here’s some more scripture to chew on:
James 1:26
If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, his religion is vain.
James 3:10
From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. This need not be so, my brothers.
11
Does a spring gush forth from the same opening both pure and brackish water?
12
Can a fig tree, my brothers, produce olives, or a grapevine figs? Neither can salt water yield fresh.
E
Exalt
Guest
Now who is name calling?
I swear, if anyone disagrees with you ultra-conservative Catholics they’re called relativists. If only I had a penny for the number of times I’ve seen it used… I wonder if any of you know what it’s real defination is.
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McKevin
Guest
Exalt,
Wow! You’re reading something that just simply is not there. My statement on justifications for foul language as a brand of relativism is not a personal attack on Mr. O’Brien. I’m using the term relativism in two senses (1) “truth relativism”, which is the doctrine that the truth is always relative to a particular reference, such as culture and (2) “descriptive relativism”, which means that different cultures have different views of morality.
Herein lies the relativism: Mr. O’Brien has claimed that the Catholic culture does not even consider foul language to be a moral issue. I claim that the teachings of the New Testament provide many concise references instructing us to avoid this type of behaviour and that whatever culture or circumstances you’ve been raised in is irrelative to the Truth of the Gospel.
Now he’s claimed that I have misinterpreted the scriptures and I’ve claimed that he has - that is also a disagreement and not a personal attack in either direction.
I respect Mr. O’Brien and I believe we disagree with mutual respect for each other.
One of us is wrong, but consider this: If Mr. O’Brien is wrong then he is leading people into sin. If I’m wrong then I am still encouraging good behaviour.
Peace to you,
- Status