Does your spouse or do you take vacations (or go hunting, extended time out of the house for days for something other than business, etc.) without you and the kids? If so, how do you feel about this or how does your husband/wife feel about it?
We really didn’t do a lot of separate trips while the girls were growing up. We both did our church’s retreats (Men’s and Women’s, not coed back then), but they only lasted a few days.
But we did encourage each other to take little breaks throughout the week; e.g., I would go out for a walk, or shopping, and leave my husband home with the girls. And he would go out to a movie with a friend and leave me home with the girls.
And there was one time when I took a week away to attend a Dark Shadows festival. That was fun,and I’m glad I went, especially since the actor who played Barnabas has passed away (RIP, Jonathan Frid).
Once the girls grew up, we started doing more trips apart from each other. He took up ice dancing and regularly drives a few hundred miles to practice with his partner. He will often book a hotel room while he is in her city, so that they can spend two days in a row practicing. And of course, he will often go to his ice dance weekends or competitions without me.
I love to go to craft shows, especially in the autumn, and I love driving to the small towns and spending the day. So I’ll leave my husband home (or at the rink) while I do this. I prefer to go alone, BTW, rather than finding a female friend to go along.
And in a few weeks, I’ll be in Kalamazoo at the Midwestern Synchronized Skating Sectional Competition, and chances are good that my husband won’t come (he needs to make up for “sick time” and do some serious practicing on his ice dancing). I LOVE going to synchro competitions and spending the ENTIRE day from early morning until late night in the rink watching and taking notes during the competition!
But my husband and I also love taking trips together, especially road trips!
I think that couples need to give and take when it comes to trips apart from each other. E.g., if my husband were a hunter, I would honor his time away with his hunting buddies during the season.
But I also think that while children are growing up, it’s better if both spouses limit their times apart to only a few times a year. It’s hard work taking care of children, and both mom and dad need to share the workload as much as possible, especially if one parent (or both parents) works fulltime.
I also think that when children are growing up, parents need to take them along on little family trips away from home to train them to be able to travel and have a good time, sleep in places other than their own beds, and learn lots about places away from their home.
I think parents need to be really careful to plan age-appropriate trips with their children. Kids don’t really want to go up to Door County to stay in a Bed and Breakfast. But be careful–Disney World isn’t always a good plan, either. Frankly, I think that the DisneyWorld trip should be done when the children are young teenagers, not little children–the park is simply too exhausting (and the lines way too long) for very young children, and the trip is too expensive–if you wait until the children are old enough to roam the park on their own and not need naps, then everyone will have a better time.
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