Taking away Sacraments as discipline

[Mintaka]

If your parents threatened that, they were wrong to do so. It is important to realize they were wrong to threaten your sacramental access. It is likely that they did not realize what they were doing, but it was still wrong.

But you need to forgive them. Some saints had parents who did a lot worse, and the saints offered it up and went on. If you were Confirmed, you have something to thank God for.

In this sinful world, we tend to wrong each other. If we want God’s forgiveness, we need to forgive.

 

[Vic_Taltrees_UK]

I agree with TFM about judging the right time of being sufficiently prepared - where possible.

In my day I was confirmed at 9 and we didn’t have a party.

I’m having to grow into my confirmation, as are most of us, whether we give it any thought or not.

 

[thistle]

Would it be acceptable to take away a sacrament as a form of discipline? For instance, if a teenager, who is looking forward to and excited about making Confirmation, disobeys their parents, would it be okay for a parent to cancel their Confirmation and put it off until another year as a form of punishment for misbehaving?

That would be a dreadful and unacceptable thing to do.

 

[cradlecatholic5]

Absolutely NOT!

 

[goout]

Would it be acceptable to take away a sacrament as a form of discipline? For instance, if a teenager, who is looking forward to and excited about making Confirmation, disobeys their parents, would it be okay for a parent to cancel their Confirmation and put it off until another year as a form of punishment for misbehaving?

It’s hard to read between the lines sometimes, especially when information is third-hand.
We had parents of a child delay confirmation after poor behavior. But the parents observed in a wider sense, that the bad behavior indicates the child was not ready. ]
Confirmation was not withheld merely as a form of punishment, it was withheld out of the prudential judgment of the parents concerning the spiritual disposition of the child.

 

[ffg]

Not ok, and backwards in logic.

Guardian: ’ I’m going to withhold from you what is going to help you in life’

Kid’s reaction: must not be too important then.

With regard to the whole prepared / not prepared thing -

An unprepared soul getting a ray of Grace through confirmation might be what sets things right for the person.

It’s not like communion where receiving is a sin, if not in the right state. (correct if wrong)

I would even go as far to say that most kids who do confirmation through the traditional timeframe don’t know exactly what they are doing.

To them, it’s youth group.

Luckily, I had my experience to relay to my kids, so those that have been through it, saw it for what it is, not just youth group.

 

[e_c]

Parents have many rights over their children, but access to the Sacraments per se is not one of them. That would essentially mean that parents can excommunicate their children, which is not the case.

However, the ordinary can do this, for an individual or for a group, even a whole parish. I recall an incident where Cardinal Gibbons showed up to do confirmations at a certain parish and was booed by the congregation… He interdicted it for a period.

 

[NeedImprovement]

Though the topic seems to center on Confirmation, this thread’s title mentions “sacraments” - Taking away Sacraments as discipline. But the two are not interchangeable terms

In infant Baptism :

. . . it is the parents who must be adequately prepared, as they are asking for a sacrament on behalf of another person who is too young to request it for himself/herself.

canonlawmadeeasy.com/2007/06/21/can-the-pastor-refuse-to-baptize-our-child/

In this case, the parents’ disposition directly affects the child’s access to the sacrament. The above-linked article goes on to point out that , Canon 868 §1.n2 specifically states that for an infant to be baptized licitly , there must be a

founded hope that the infant will be brought up in the Catholic religion; if such hope is altogether lacking, the baptism is to be delayed according to the prescripts of particular law after the parents have been advised about the reason.

Still wouldn’t really fit as a “form of punishment though.”

 

[poche]

Not ok, and backwards in logic.

Guardian: ’ I’m going to withhold from you what is going to help you in life’

Kid’s reaction: must not be too important then.

With regard to the whole prepared / not prepared thing -

An unprepared soul getting a ray of Grace through confirmation might be what sets things right for the person.

It’s not like communion where receiving is a sin, if not in the right state. (correct if wrong)

I would even go as far to say that most kids who do confirmation through the traditional timeframe don’t know exactly what they are doing.

To them, it’s youth group.

Luckily, I had my experience to relay to my kids, so those that have been through it, saw it for what it is, not just youth group.

It would be a sacrilege to receive the Sacrament of Confirmation in the state of mortal sin.

 

[poche]

Maybe what the parents should do is take their child to confession.

 

[poche]

I know of a parent who forbade their child to serve mass because of bad behaviour,