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retrovert
Guest
Kudos, DonnaMaria. I never thought of that angle re preparing for a future defense, but it sure fits…
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puzzleannie
Guest
the two most commonly used abuse prevention programs used for children in Catholic dioceses in this country are Talking about Touching (not approved in my diocese) and Touching Safety (by Virtus, who also does Protecting God’s Children, orientation for employees, volunteers and parents). They are aimed at grades K-12, with components for each age group including video and “handouts” and a lesson plan for catechists, and an information pack for parents.Puzzleannie, can you tell us what age group they’re aimed to? I have to wonder why CCD programs need to be discussing these issues…don’t parents do that job? Maybe I’m naive.
You can review Touching Safety on the Virtus website. I don’t know how you would view Talking about Touching, I saw the materials and videos at a catechetical conference and don’t recall who sells it.
Neither of these programs is “sex ed”. Their focus is very narrow and aimed at helping a child recognize behaviors that are threatenting, learning to say know, and learning to report bad behaviors to a safe adult, setting boundaries etc. My objection to the videos used in TAT is that they are much more explicit about those objectionable behaviors, and especially in young children can IMO be very confusing about the line between acceptable and unacceptable touching, and give them ideas and worries they should not have to have.
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Donna_Maria
Guest
Thanks, puzzleannie. I wondered if there were any other programs out there. Since there’s so much controversy surrounding Talking About Touching, perhaps it would be wise to consider alternative programs. Again, I don’t think any program is going to be the sole solution. In fact, it may do more harm by causing unwarranted worry and instilling children to distrust adults.
But we are ignoring the elephant in the room:
Stop the sin. We need to counter the if-it-feels-good mentality with sound theology. We live in an age where radical individualism trumps the authority of the Church. Too many think that the Church as no right to impose its teaching on faith and morals. And too many in the Church are all too happy to acquiesce to the demands of our culture that sees relativism as a virtue. So when a crisis arises, we destroy another well-founded tradition; in the case of the sexual abuse scandal, childhood is the victim
We need to adopt the No Sinner Left Behind attitude.
But we are ignoring the elephant in the room:
Stop the sin. We need to counter the if-it-feels-good mentality with sound theology. We live in an age where radical individualism trumps the authority of the Church. Too many think that the Church as no right to impose its teaching on faith and morals. And too many in the Church are all too happy to acquiesce to the demands of our culture that sees relativism as a virtue. So when a crisis arises, we destroy another well-founded tradition; in the case of the sexual abuse scandal, childhood is the victim
We need to adopt the No Sinner Left Behind attitude.
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duskyjewel
Guest
We’re not just trying to protect our kids from perverts in the church. We need to help them be able to recognize dangerous behavior from coaches, teachers, troop leaders, babysitters…
There are many people our kids come into contact with that are not Catholic and don’t care what the Church’s teaching is about sexuality. They are disordered and will try to abuse our children because they find children sexually attractive. Even a mother as “overprotective” as me cannot be with her children 24 hours a day. If I could “stop the sin” I would, but I have no power in other people’s lives. I only have power over what I teach my kids, and if that means discussing these horrible things with them even though it breaks my heart, then I will do that before I just let them go out into the world knowing nothing and have them come to me later having been abused. I know that might happen anyway, but we all know that pedophiles target the weak kids, the ones who won’t fight back or tell. They use behavioral strategies and they test boundaries to see which kids tell them to back off and which are too meek. Then they home in on the meek ones…
I am not saying any of these programs are the answer, but my kids need to know that they have the right to say no to certain types of touching, no matter who is doing it, and that they need to tell me and it is not their fault. I will do that education for my own kids, but we have parents on this forum (and all over society) that can’t even bring themselves to discuss where babies come from honestly with their kids. Do you think they will be talking about sexual abuse? The Church neglected its obligation to protect children for so long that it needs to be doing some of this work, but unfortunately, churches and schools need to do this also because some parents refuse to get past their own weakness and talk to their children.
There are many people our kids come into contact with that are not Catholic and don’t care what the Church’s teaching is about sexuality. They are disordered and will try to abuse our children because they find children sexually attractive. Even a mother as “overprotective” as me cannot be with her children 24 hours a day. If I could “stop the sin” I would, but I have no power in other people’s lives. I only have power over what I teach my kids, and if that means discussing these horrible things with them even though it breaks my heart, then I will do that before I just let them go out into the world knowing nothing and have them come to me later having been abused. I know that might happen anyway, but we all know that pedophiles target the weak kids, the ones who won’t fight back or tell. They use behavioral strategies and they test boundaries to see which kids tell them to back off and which are too meek. Then they home in on the meek ones…
I am not saying any of these programs are the answer, but my kids need to know that they have the right to say no to certain types of touching, no matter who is doing it, and that they need to tell me and it is not their fault. I will do that education for my own kids, but we have parents on this forum (and all over society) that can’t even bring themselves to discuss where babies come from honestly with their kids. Do you think they will be talking about sexual abuse? The Church neglected its obligation to protect children for so long that it needs to be doing some of this work, but unfortunately, churches and schools need to do this also because some parents refuse to get past their own weakness and talk to their children.
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Donna_Maria
Guest
There can’t be two teachings of sexuality, one for Catholics and one for the others. Either the Church’s teaching on faith and morals is true or it’s not. Catholics are not the only ones with souls.There are many people our kids come into contact with that are not Catholic and don’t care what the Church’s teaching is about sexuality. .
Actually you are stopping sin. By educating your children you are not only protecting them from evil but also preventing them from choosing evil. I’m not against parents talking to their children about sex and sexual abuse, in fact, I think parents are the best ones to address these issues. Nobody knows your child like you do. I distrust one grade fits all type programs.If I could “stop the sin” I would, but I have no power in other people’s lives. I only have power over what I teach my kids, and if that means discussing these horrible things with them even though it breaks my heart,
So why not have a session just for parents? Give parents support and the confidence to discuss these sensitive topics with their own instead of exposing the children to material that may not be suitable for that particular child.Do you think they will be talking about sexual abuse?
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puzzleannie
Guest
there are also 3 videos aimed at preschool, primary and middle-schoolers, cartoons with animal characters, not part of a program to my knowledge, but with explicit stories of kiddies being hurt, touched or otherwise abused by adults, and what they did about it, I can’t remember the names off the top of my head, by the characters in the preschool video are mice. The animation is pretty bad, and the presentation (I only saw one of them) definitely would put harmful ideas in the minds of kids who have no idea this kind of evil exists, and make them very fearful of normal interaction with adults close to them.Thanks, puzzleannie. I wondered if there were any other programs out there. .
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puzzleannie
Guest
both touching safety and TAT (as well as PGC) have modules for parents. So far only a couple of parents have attended our TS and PGC orientations each of the last 3 years.There So why not have a session just for parents? Give parents support and the confidence to discuss these sensitive topics with their own instead of exposing the children to material that may not be suitable for that particular child.
I urge you parents in strongest possible terms to view what is being used in your parish (or in your child’s public or private school) for this topic. This is your duty. The parish or school is required to let you see the materials first and to opt out if that is your decision.
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Viki59
Guest
Actually, statistics show that a very small percentage of priests were involved in the scandals, and if I’m correct a slightly larger percentage of Protestant clergy have also been involved. It just never was very interesting to the media. Teachers, scout leaders, and other authorities also have this problem to a greater degree than Catholic priests.I went through a period where I questioned whether I was doing the right thing by raising my children in this Church, or was it immoral to even consider doing so, as they failed so miserably, so purposefully in some cases, and for so long to protect children from the monsters within their own ranks…
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Sarabande
Guest
Since I haven’t seen the videos and have not heard of the program until I read this thread, I cannot comment on the quality of the videos or the programs. I can say as a former victim of molestation, if there were some sort of program or discussion with my parents about molestation, child rape and incest, perhaps I wouldn’t have experienced the years of embarrassment and received help sooner. I was only 5 when it happened, but until my late teens and early twenties I kept it secret because I was embarrassed and blamed myself for what had happened to me.
At the time, although I didn’t understand what was happening to me, I didn’t like it and didn’t want it and knew intrinsicly that there was something horriably wrong with the situation. I would try to stop him, but he kept saying it was “ok” and that he was my uncle, so why would he want to hurt me. Thankfully, despite being fairly meek, my angel watched over me and helped me stand up to him when he tried to do it the second and last time he babysat us. But the harm was already done. I was wary of all men, except for my father and a few in my family, never wanting to be alone with anyone except for the ones I trusted. I kept feeling the embarrassment and guilt of this. So many child victims go through this and many don’t learn until they are adults that there is no reason to feel guilt or embarrassment. That it wasn’t our faults.
Anyway, perhaps the goup sessions may not be the best way to approach this, especially with younger children. I think it would probably be best if parents are educated on how to speak with their children individually rather than in groups. That way the parent can decide how to approach the situation. It’s more important that the parents are aware of warning signs and scenarios so that they can gently teach their children without hurting their innocence. The hardest part is recognizing if a family member is a pervert and hurting your child. My mother never thought her baby brother, whom she helped raise, would be that way and I never said or did anything to indicate that he did hurt me. And, unfortunately, I believe the majority of child sexual abuse occurs amongst family more so than amongst clergy or other kinds of people.
Well, those are my thoughts on it.
At the time, although I didn’t understand what was happening to me, I didn’t like it and didn’t want it and knew intrinsicly that there was something horriably wrong with the situation. I would try to stop him, but he kept saying it was “ok” and that he was my uncle, so why would he want to hurt me. Thankfully, despite being fairly meek, my angel watched over me and helped me stand up to him when he tried to do it the second and last time he babysat us. But the harm was already done. I was wary of all men, except for my father and a few in my family, never wanting to be alone with anyone except for the ones I trusted. I kept feeling the embarrassment and guilt of this. So many child victims go through this and many don’t learn until they are adults that there is no reason to feel guilt or embarrassment. That it wasn’t our faults.
Anyway, perhaps the goup sessions may not be the best way to approach this, especially with younger children. I think it would probably be best if parents are educated on how to speak with their children individually rather than in groups. That way the parent can decide how to approach the situation. It’s more important that the parents are aware of warning signs and scenarios so that they can gently teach their children without hurting their innocence. The hardest part is recognizing if a family member is a pervert and hurting your child. My mother never thought her baby brother, whom she helped raise, would be that way and I never said or did anything to indicate that he did hurt me. And, unfortunately, I believe the majority of child sexual abuse occurs amongst family more so than amongst clergy or other kinds of people.
Well, those are my thoughts on it.
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Moms3Angels
Guest
I wrote a letter to the National Catholic Register. It’s printed below. I would also suggest EVERY Catholic parent read the document Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality, in which you will find the Catholic Church is in opposition to these types of programs in the classroom. We live in NH and our diocese came up with a similar program for our kids. We also lived in Lexington KY where our elementary school adopted Talking About Touching. I removed my children from the class and eventually from the school. I also wrote several letters to the Bishop requesting its removal. I’m not sure how any Catholic school could bring this in when the abuse had nothing to do with the children and everything to do with the abusers and those who condoned their behavior. Here is my letter…
Let Parents Parent
Regarding Diocese of Manchester Creates Complementary Safe Environment Programs (Nov 12-18):
There are reasons why many dioceses throughout the United States feel uneasy about presenting these programs. Its because many parents are outraged that this type of material is being brought into the classroom.
There are valid reasons why parents and the Catholic Medical Association oppose these programs in the school. Looking at the curriculum and not knowing where a facilitator will take a sensitive discussion certainly causes concern for parents. This curriculum may be slightly different from some of the other controversial programs, but the topic of sexual abuse remains the same. Since the topic remains the same, parents will not know where the discussion goes as it unfolds in a classroom with someone other than a parent.
As the article states, this is the job of the parent. How can a diocese support the role of a parent, while at the same time, step into their shoes? You dont make parents responsible by taking responsibility away from them. If this were really an issue of aiding parents in their role, these programs would be offered after school hours so students can opt in instead of requiring students to opt out.
We pay tuition and every program introduced during the school day ultimately takes time away from our children receiving academic instruction.
In addition to this assault on parental rights, we all have to wonder how much money was spent on a program that many of us, if not all of us, have already spent time discussing with our children. This is money that could go for supporting our underpaid teachers or providing a Catholic education for a family who can not afford it.
If parents wanted their children to participate in these kinds of programs, we would send our children to public schools where oftentimes they prove to be a failed effort at a costly expense. We choose to take our role as parents very seriously, and the fact that we pay tuition should indicate how important our children are to us.
These programs do nothing to ensure the safety of our children. We cant say we support parents, then seek to undermine their role at the same time.
Let Parents Parent
Regarding Diocese of Manchester Creates Complementary Safe Environment Programs (Nov 12-18):
There are reasons why many dioceses throughout the United States feel uneasy about presenting these programs. Its because many parents are outraged that this type of material is being brought into the classroom.
There are valid reasons why parents and the Catholic Medical Association oppose these programs in the school. Looking at the curriculum and not knowing where a facilitator will take a sensitive discussion certainly causes concern for parents. This curriculum may be slightly different from some of the other controversial programs, but the topic of sexual abuse remains the same. Since the topic remains the same, parents will not know where the discussion goes as it unfolds in a classroom with someone other than a parent.
As the article states, this is the job of the parent. How can a diocese support the role of a parent, while at the same time, step into their shoes? You dont make parents responsible by taking responsibility away from them. If this were really an issue of aiding parents in their role, these programs would be offered after school hours so students can opt in instead of requiring students to opt out.
We pay tuition and every program introduced during the school day ultimately takes time away from our children receiving academic instruction.
In addition to this assault on parental rights, we all have to wonder how much money was spent on a program that many of us, if not all of us, have already spent time discussing with our children. This is money that could go for supporting our underpaid teachers or providing a Catholic education for a family who can not afford it.
If parents wanted their children to participate in these kinds of programs, we would send our children to public schools where oftentimes they prove to be a failed effort at a costly expense. We choose to take our role as parents very seriously, and the fact that we pay tuition should indicate how important our children are to us.
These programs do nothing to ensure the safety of our children. We cant say we support parents, then seek to undermine their role at the same time.
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duskyjewel
Guest
That’s not what I am talking about. I am talking about how the power structure of the Church was so busy trying to protect its image that it sacrificed the children and families who were harmed, in some cases actively discouraging families from going to the police and telling them they would help nothing and only harm the Church if they did. Transferring priests without so much as a whisper of warning to the families at the new parish as to what they were getting. Stuff like that. Then, when the scandal broke, the way some bishops were more interested in protecting the privacy of their files than in answering for the harm and wrong that was done to the victims.Actually, statistics show that a very small percentage of priests were involved in the scandals, and if I’m correct a slightly larger percentage of Protestant clergy have also been involved. It just never was very interesting to the media. Teachers, scout leaders, and other authorities also have this problem to a greater degree than Catholic priests.
I am well aware that the percentage of priests who are pedophiles has been in line with the percentage of the larger population. And that every church and organization has the same problem with trying to weed them out.
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puzzleannie
Guest
these programs are not sex ed, but we do have some good threads on that topic as well, and why parishes should not be taking this responsibility away from the parents.MargieOH,
I was going to write pretty much what you did, but you did a lot better job than I could have.
These sex education programs are another example of political correctness gone amok. If.
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Moms3Angels
Guest
Can anyone guarantee how a discussion will go in a classroom when the teacher begins talking to children about sexual situations? I looked over the materials from the TALKING ABOUT TOUCHING program and when you bring up the topic of sex, there is no guarantee of how the discussion will unfold. YES, our children should receive information that is age appropriate, BUT it should come from the parent. Not a teacher we know nothing about.
I had one Catholic elementry teacher tell me that abstinence was an unrealistic expectation!! If she has NO standards for children when it comes to pre-marital sex, how can I trust that she will give my children good information on anything related to sex?
Parents do your own job and stop putting this on the shoulders of teachers. Can you imagine how embarrassing and uncomfortable it will be for some of these teachers?
I’ve gone through the VIRTUS program and I RESENT having to sit through that garbage. I am a mother of 3 children who’ve NEVER abused a child. YET I’m now subjected to this garbage because we had liberal Priests and Bishops who embraced dissent in the Church to the point where it blew up in our faces.
Focus on what got us into this mess. Focus on the dissent that was alllowed to run rampant in our seminaries and in our Parishes. Focus on Church leaders who dissent from Church teachings and embrace dissent. Focus on what got us into this mess instead of focusing on innocent parents and children who had NOTHING to do with this disaster.
If you cannot embrace the doctrine of the Church, step down from your leadership position. If you cannot hold dear to the TRUTHS of the Church, maybe you should remove yourself from your position of authority.
READ: The Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality. ALL Catholic parents should read this document. The Church REJECTS sex ed in the classroom, and Talking About Touching IS and CAN be a tool for teaching sex in the classroom. If we continue to accept these dissenting programs in the classroom, is it any surprise that we then get dissenting Priests willing to abuse our children?
Open the door to a little dissent here and there, and before you know it, we have a scandal.
The Church has said NO to these kinds of programs in the classroom and it’s up to US to continue to tell our Bishops we do NOT want this garbage inflicted upon our kids.
No where in the Charter for the Protection of Children which came out of the Bishop’s meeting does it state that we MUST inflict this upon children. In fact, it puts teachers and school administrators in the position of violating children and their innocence. IF i were a Catholic school teacher I’d refuse to teach this, because I could become the next victim of a lawsuit!! THere has already been letters written to Bishops warning them of the potential lawsuits against teachers and school administrators who teach this material in the classroom as it can be seen as violating the Dallas Charter.
I had one Catholic elementry teacher tell me that abstinence was an unrealistic expectation!! If she has NO standards for children when it comes to pre-marital sex, how can I trust that she will give my children good information on anything related to sex?
Parents do your own job and stop putting this on the shoulders of teachers. Can you imagine how embarrassing and uncomfortable it will be for some of these teachers?
I’ve gone through the VIRTUS program and I RESENT having to sit through that garbage. I am a mother of 3 children who’ve NEVER abused a child. YET I’m now subjected to this garbage because we had liberal Priests and Bishops who embraced dissent in the Church to the point where it blew up in our faces.
Focus on what got us into this mess. Focus on the dissent that was alllowed to run rampant in our seminaries and in our Parishes. Focus on Church leaders who dissent from Church teachings and embrace dissent. Focus on what got us into this mess instead of focusing on innocent parents and children who had NOTHING to do with this disaster.
If you cannot embrace the doctrine of the Church, step down from your leadership position. If you cannot hold dear to the TRUTHS of the Church, maybe you should remove yourself from your position of authority.
READ: The Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality. ALL Catholic parents should read this document. The Church REJECTS sex ed in the classroom, and Talking About Touching IS and CAN be a tool for teaching sex in the classroom. If we continue to accept these dissenting programs in the classroom, is it any surprise that we then get dissenting Priests willing to abuse our children?
Open the door to a little dissent here and there, and before you know it, we have a scandal.
The Church has said NO to these kinds of programs in the classroom and it’s up to US to continue to tell our Bishops we do NOT want this garbage inflicted upon our kids.
No where in the Charter for the Protection of Children which came out of the Bishop’s meeting does it state that we MUST inflict this upon children. In fact, it puts teachers and school administrators in the position of violating children and their innocence. IF i were a Catholic school teacher I’d refuse to teach this, because I could become the next victim of a lawsuit!! THere has already been letters written to Bishops warning them of the potential lawsuits against teachers and school administrators who teach this material in the classroom as it can be seen as violating the Dallas Charter.
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Moms3Angels
Guest
Talking About Touching IS Sex Ed!
lifesite.net/ldn/2006/mar/06030809.html
“Talking about Touching” Sex-Ed Opponent Fr. Altier Writes to Spirit Daily
Previously stated pre-school program completely violates Catholic Church teaching
By Terry Vanderheyden
SAINT PAUL - MINNEAPOLIS, March 8, 2006 (LifeSiteNews.com) – Rev. Robert Altier, the priest silenced by local Archbishop Harry J. Flynn for his opposition to a controversial sex education program for children from kindergarten up, has written to explain his position, as reported on the Catholic news site, Spirit Daily (see spiritdaily.com/churchgyrations.htm)
lifesite.net/ldn/2006/mar/06030809.html
“Talking about Touching” Sex-Ed Opponent Fr. Altier Writes to Spirit Daily
Previously stated pre-school program completely violates Catholic Church teaching
By Terry Vanderheyden
SAINT PAUL - MINNEAPOLIS, March 8, 2006 (LifeSiteNews.com) – Rev. Robert Altier, the priest silenced by local Archbishop Harry J. Flynn for his opposition to a controversial sex education program for children from kindergarten up, has written to explain his position, as reported on the Catholic news site, Spirit Daily (see spiritdaily.com/churchgyrations.htm)
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Don_Hepler
Guest
I think you ought to take Christ with you, If it offends you, you know what he will think. Do not take away the innocences of their mines, If we are to become like children, lets not act like adults.Why wouldn’t they use the anatomically correct names for body parts? I don’t get that part…are we or are we not trying to prevent a repeat of the sexual abuse scandal here? Parents should be using those terms, and so should other people educating children on these issues. As for how “explicit” the program is…do we want our children to have the tools to fight pedophiles or don’t we? Euphemizing only clouds the issue. We should tell our children the truth.
Stop being so squeamish…it serves no one! I am GLAD that parishes are doing this now. Yes, it’s uncomfortable, but it has to be done.
I agree with the recommendation of viewing the materials yourself. That is the best way to go in making a decision.
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Arwen037
Guest
I’m 18. when I was 16 I wanted to volunteer at a catholic special needs daycare center, connecting to my high school. I was forced to take the “Protecting God’s Children” course in order to do so. First of all, I had to wait 6 months because they pretty much only offer it in October. Second of all, half the program was “Don’t abuse children” and the other half was more aimed at children on how to stay out of dangerous situations. It made no sense what-so-ever. And then my high school made me take time out of class to watch a video which was suppose to be the pre-adult version of “protecting God’s children”, but all it was was how to protect ourselves. It was ridiculous.
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Donna_Maria
Guest
At our parish, if your younger than 18, you don’t have to take Protecting God’s Children (PGC). I’m shocked that at 16 you had to take PGC! Was this also a pre-adult version? If not, then you sat through both programs? What are the differences? Your (name removed by moderator)ut is enlightening. Thanks for posting.I’m 18. when I was 16 I wanted to volunteer at a catholic special needs daycare center, connecting to my high school. I was forced to take the “Protecting God’s Children” course in order to do so. First of all, I had to wait 6 months because they pretty much only offer it in October. Second of all, half the program was “Don’t abuse children” and the other half was more aimed at children on how to stay out of dangerous situations. It made no sense what-so-ever. And then my high school made me take time out of class to watch a video which was suppose to be the pre-adult version of “protecting God’s children”, but all it was was how to protect ourselves. It was ridiculous.
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iamrefreshed
Guest
Any program that teaches children it is OK to say NO is, in my opinion, a good one. Ideally parents would give that lesson.
But, unlike the parents posting on this thread, most do not. In fact, many of the abusers are the parents themselves.
That is the saddest fact of all.
But, unlike the parents posting on this thread, most do not. In fact, many of the abusers are the parents themselves.
That is the saddest fact of all.
M
Moms3Angels
Guest
Iamrefreshed:
If that program contradicts what the Church teaches, then exactly how do you reconcile that? Would it be ok to show kids porno if it includes teaching them HOW to say NO? If you say it’s ok to contradict Church teachings on this subject, then is it a surprise that we have Priests and Bishops who rejected Church teachings when it came to abusing children? Is that a bit of a leap? Yes, but if we are going to expect Priests and Bishops to follow Church teachings and respect our children, should we not also be saying we too support the teachings of the Church? The Church opposes Sex education in the classroom. These programs are Sex Education wrapped up in a different wrapping.
Why is it that no one has any faith in parents anymore? These parents pay tuition to send their kids to a Catholic school. They are clearly parents who care about their kids. Please don’t underestimate all parents. It was NOT the fault of the parents OR the children who were abused by our Priests.
Just because a child goes through this program doesn’t guarantee they will say no. The burden doesn’t belong on the child’s back. The burden belongs right where the abuse is coming from. It’s coming from Priests and Bishops who for YEARS have OPENLY dissented from Church teachings.
If you want to make parents responsible, why take responsibility away from them? Why not offer a class after school that parents could take IF they want to take the class that teaches THEM how to talk to their children about safety. If a parent is clueless, then they can have the option of seeking help through the Church. This is what the Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuailty suggests. THe Church should ONLY be there if the parent is UNable to perform their parental duties. NOT in REPLACEMENT of the parent.
If you continue to remove the parent in these most critical roles of their child’s life, how can you possibly say you are fostering and supporting the parent/child relationship.
This is a sensitive/embarrassing/subject that no stranger has a right to be discussing with MY child.
If that program contradicts what the Church teaches, then exactly how do you reconcile that? Would it be ok to show kids porno if it includes teaching them HOW to say NO? If you say it’s ok to contradict Church teachings on this subject, then is it a surprise that we have Priests and Bishops who rejected Church teachings when it came to abusing children? Is that a bit of a leap? Yes, but if we are going to expect Priests and Bishops to follow Church teachings and respect our children, should we not also be saying we too support the teachings of the Church? The Church opposes Sex education in the classroom. These programs are Sex Education wrapped up in a different wrapping.
Why is it that no one has any faith in parents anymore? These parents pay tuition to send their kids to a Catholic school. They are clearly parents who care about their kids. Please don’t underestimate all parents. It was NOT the fault of the parents OR the children who were abused by our Priests.
Just because a child goes through this program doesn’t guarantee they will say no. The burden doesn’t belong on the child’s back. The burden belongs right where the abuse is coming from. It’s coming from Priests and Bishops who for YEARS have OPENLY dissented from Church teachings.
If you want to make parents responsible, why take responsibility away from them? Why not offer a class after school that parents could take IF they want to take the class that teaches THEM how to talk to their children about safety. If a parent is clueless, then they can have the option of seeking help through the Church. This is what the Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuailty suggests. THe Church should ONLY be there if the parent is UNable to perform their parental duties. NOT in REPLACEMENT of the parent.
If you continue to remove the parent in these most critical roles of their child’s life, how can you possibly say you are fostering and supporting the parent/child relationship.
This is a sensitive/embarrassing/subject that no stranger has a right to be discussing with MY child.
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Donna_Maria
Guest
The saddest fact of all are people who judge others without the data. How do you know? It is impossible to tell from the postings here what parents say or don’t say to their children. I take offense at your remark because I am not only a frequent poster here but also the one who started this thread.Any program that teaches children it is OK to say NO is, in my opinion, a good one. Ideally parents would give that lesson.
But, unlike the parents posting on this thread, most do not. In fact, many of the abusers are the parents themselves.
That is the saddest fact of all.
The intent of this tread is to evaluate the Talk about Touching program not whether parents should or shouldn’t talk about sex.
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