Estevao said:
“Women also tend to like men who are liked by other woman, that is pre-approved by other women, and having lots of women lined up in your dating plans is the way to effect this as well.”
“Lots of women” is probably unrealistic for most guys. It’s expensive to pay for all those first dates, as well as being demoralizing. And if it’s just text contact, that’s not real. I’ve seen a lot of criticism from women online about guys from dating sites who text them a lot and then fizzle out before meeting them–it’s like these guys are much more comfortable communicating electronically, but don’t have the guts to actually meet in person.
“And as another poster said, make sure you don’t have any honorable intentions with this woman, do not think about a “relationship” or go into dating with the mind set that you’re going to marry this woman. Women these days tend to put marriage off for their careers and having fun, so you coming in with honorable intentions is going to be a huge turn off.”
The median age at first marriage for US women is currently around 26 years old. If she graduates from college at 22 (and a lot of people take longer than that), then that means she has 4 years to have fun, work, meet a guy, get serious, get engaged and get married. That is an awful lot of stuff to fit into 4 years, even without any false starts. And that’s just a median–lots of women get married earlier. (Actually, in our area, we joke that a wedding makes a GREAT college senior project.)
infoplease.com/ipa/A0005061.html
“If you’ve ever gotten it into your head that a man is supposed to be the “provider” in a relationship, I suggest banishing that because the only thing that women these days want men to provide for them is fun and something spicy to spark up their boring lives.”
That depends very much on class and social milieu. Piano lessons and summer camp don’t pay for themselves, you know.
There’s a funny scene from the comedy “The Hebrew Hammer” (warning–bad language) where the hero’s love interest asks him to talk dirty to her.
youtube.com/watch?v=voFeNKjovdY
Not to step all over the joke, but what really turns her on is him talking about a house in a nice neighborhood, private school for their kids, and music lessons. That’s a joke about what Jewish women want, but an educated Catholic woman will want something very similar for her kids.
“Also, just a heads up when getting dating advice from women, when they say “don’t be creepy/don’t give off the creepy vibes”, what they mean is “if you’re going to hit on me out of the blue, you had better be attractive”. I’m guessing that if you see yourself as higher than a 7/10 in the looks department, you can rest assured that a woman is not going to get any “creepiness” vibes when you ask her out.”
Even if you’re good looking, it’s entirely possible to act (indeed, to be) creepy. (Also, to be very honest, physical attractiveness is not that important for guys. As long as you are of average height and not terribly pimply, have decent hygiene, and acceptable clothing, you’re good.)
You need to remember that you’re probably a head taller than her and at least 50 pounds heavier than her (not to mention having much greater upper body strength). If you turned out not to be a perfect gentleman, she would be in a lot of physical danger from you.
I confess, though, that creepiness is very situationally dependent. When I was first dating my future husband, we seemed to bump into each other a lot. Only after we knew each other much better did I discover that when I’d told him the classes I was taking, he had noted them down and familiarized himself with my schedule. Hence, he found it easy to bump into me. Now, I could have found that creepy when I found out about it, but as it happened, I liked him enough that I found it charmingly romantic. If I didn’t like him, it would have been creepy.
