Teaching our children safe sex

[tamccrackine]

I live in the state of Florida, and the Florida Department of Health recognizes that when our young people are given the message that is given above, then, in most cases, they will go ahead and have “safe sex”, which is not safe at all.

Many STD’s can be caught while using condoms; and most of all they will not be hearing the truth about the virtue of chastity and what blessings can be had by obeying the Lord.

Having volunteered as a counselor at a pregnancy crisis center in
my area for five years, I attended an excellent workshop given by a Christian man. This workshop is funded by the Florida Department of Health and the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. They will help with literature for any public school that chooses to implement this program that advocates abstinence only. They do this because they found out that the mixed message given to our youth does not work. They present these workshops in the hopes that schools and youth ministers in churches will want to give these talks to the youth.

They also have youth rallies that parents and teen-agers attend together.

This website tells more about it:

greattowait.com

Chris Everett is great as well!!! Safe sex is a mixed message because it teaches the child “I’d rather you make a good choice for yourself, but because I don’t trust you to make a smart choice, here’s contraceptives that have proven to not be 100% protective.”

 

[Dorothy]

Chris Everett is great as well!!! Safe sex is a mixed message because it teaches the child “I’d rather you make a good choice for yourself, but because I don’t trust you to make a smart choice, here’s contraceptives that have proven to not be 100% protective.”

Yes, Christ Evert is a great speaker! There are DVD’s available that can be purchased and shown to youth at CCD. Also Pam Stenzel captivates the earns the respect of the teens she speaks to as well. If anyone is interested in getting these VCR’s or DVD’s just google their names and see their websites.

 

[1ke]

Of course I am hoping my children will abstain from sex until they are in a loving, committed relationship. But I plan on teaching them about safe sex and contraceptives, in addition to teaching them about abstaining.

I would rather have a sexually active adult child that is ALIVE and healthy, than a sexually active adult child that didn’t have the proper education and is fighting a deadly disease.

I feel sorry for your kids.

 

[deb1]

I am just stunned at your naviety. What would happen if you find yourself in a marriage to a man with an STD and who continually mistreats you verbally? Would you stay with that man because your mom said to on your wedding night?

It is lack of education in the Catholic homes that is spreading STDs and unwanted pregnancies. Just because we are Catholic doesn’t mean that we cannot inform our children on all things sexual.

And no, I don’t believe that a loving, committed relationship is necessarily marriage.

I don’t understand what waiting until your marriage has to do with having an abusive husband. It wouldn’t make this imaginary husband any less abusive if you hadn’t waited.

Even if you leave an abusive marriage you can not remarry or get reinvolved in another relationship until/if your marriage is annuled by the church.

 

[Mirror_Mirror]

Of course I am hoping my children will abstain from sex until they are in a loving, committed relationship. But I plan on teaching them about safe sex and contraceptives, in addition to teaching them about abstaining.

I would rather have a sexually active adult child that is ALIVE and healthy, than a sexually active adult child that didn’t have the proper education and is fighting a deadly disease.

Please tell me that you are not serious about this. Are you going to tell me that you are one of those parents that goes under the belief that “They are going to drink anyway, so it is best that I buy the alcohol and let them do so at my house?”

Teaching them about contraceptives is the exact opposite of what we as Catholic parents are called to do.

Your post is very disturbing.

 

[whatevergirl]

Kids are not stupid. They know condoms are out there. Their friends talk about it, if we don’t. My son who is 14, knows exactly what a condom is for…I’m not going to teach him to use it though. It would show, in some warped way, that I condone it. He knows though, if he ever makes the choice to use one…he will probably figure out how to use it. It will be his choice. Not my teaching that it’s an option, that will cause his use of it.

That’s the tricky spot with this topic.

If I teach my kids to drive…that shows that I accept it. If I teach them how to use condoms…it shows that I accept it. Period. That’s the truth.

Now, will kids have sex if their parents don’t teach them about condoms? Yes. But, what’s happening is that parents in leaps and bounds ARE teaching their kids about condoms…more often, than not.

Let’s try to show our kids that we give them credit for being smart human beings…who want to please God. Let’s stop treating them like they can’t control themselves…and who knows…maybe they will.

 

[jmcrae]

I don’t understand what waiting until your marriage has to do with having an abusive husband.

In fact, I think a couple that waits until marriage before having sex is a lot more likely to know more about each other before they get married, and avoid the situation of marrying an abusive and controlling spouse, because they will have had the important conversations ahead of time. (Sex is often used as a distraction to avoid important conversations.)

 

[Bella3502]

Frankly, I am stunned that you say you are Catholic, when you seem to be picking and choosing which parts of the Church’s teachings you want to agree with and follow.

I think she is doing what most Catholics do. Most Catholics “pick and choose”. Most Catholics use some form of artificial birth control. Isn’t that “picking and choosing”?

My sister had her tubes tied the same day she had her second child. She had a girl and a boy. They did not want any more. And she didn’t want to use birth control for the next 20 years. Her kids are grown now and she has no reqrets. Isn’t that “picking and choosing”?

When my mother was in the hospital and near death, we decided not to have a feeding tube inserted, mainly because we knew that she would not want it. Some would say we let her starve to death. I don’t agree. Isn’t that “picking and choosing”?

Many Catholics are pro-choice and yet would never think of having an abortion. Isn’t that “picking and choosing”?

You can have a commited relationship without a marriage certificate. Many Catholics have them.

 

[Bella3502]

I feel sorry for your kids.

I don’t think her kids need your pity. Sound to me that they will be well informed and able to make the right choices for them.

I feel sorry for kids who have parents that keep them in the dark about sexuality. That’s when the mistakes begin. It is foolish to think they won’t do anything, cause they don’t know anything.

 

[LJN21]

I don’t think her kids need your pity. Sound to me that they will be well informed and able to make the right choices for them.

I feel sorry for kids who have parents that keep them in the dark about sexuality. That’s when the mistakes begin. It is foolish to think they won’t do anything, cause they don’t know anything.

There is a difference between being in the dark sexually and knowing that sex before marriage is wrong and a mortal sin.

Just because you know abstinence before marriage is the best way to have a happy health marriage no way means your in the dark.

 

[GandalfTheWhite]

I think she is doing what most Catholics do. Most Catholics “pick and choose”. Most Catholics use some form of artificial birth control. Isn’t that “picking and choosing”?

My sister had her tubes tied the same day she had her second child. She had a girl and a boy. They did not want any more. And she didn’t want to use birth control for the next 20 years. Her kids are grown now and she has no reqrets. Isn’t that “picking and choosing”?

When my mother was in the hospital and near death, we decided not to have a feeding tube inserted, mainly because we knew that she would not want it. Some would say we let her starve to death. I don’t agree. Isn’t that “picking and choosing”?

Many Catholics are pro-choice and yet would never think of having an abortion. Isn’t that “picking and choosing”?

You can have a commited relationship without a marriage certificate. Many Catholics have them.

You are right, many are. Does the fact that others do it make it right? No! What you’re essentially doing is teaching relativism. It is right because others do it. Cannibalism in the Caribbean was not wrong because many were practicing it!

It is very said that many people who call themselves Catholics are either very misinformed or are heretics.

 

[Pixie_Dust]

I think she is doing what most Catholics do. Most Catholics “pick and choose”. Most Catholics use some form of artificial birth control. Isn’t that “picking and choosing”?

My sister had her tubes tied the same day she had her second child. She had a girl and a boy. They did not want any more. And she didn’t want to use birth control for the next 20 years. Her kids are grown now and she has no reqrets. Isn’t that “picking and choosing”?

When my mother was in the hospital and near death, we decided not to have a feeding tube inserted, mainly because we knew that she would not want it. Some would say we let her starve to death. I don’t agree. Isn’t that “picking and choosing”?

Many Catholics are pro-choice and yet would never think of having an abortion. Isn’t that “picking and choosing”?

You can have a commited relationship without a marriage certificate. Many Catholics have them.

Yep, I am aware that the world is full of Cafeteria Catholics that either are unaware of or just flat ignore the Church’s teachings on matters of faith and morals. Does that make them right? Does that make their choice to contracept OK? The “everyone else is doing it” argument didn’t hold up for me with my mom.

It was because they didn’t do what everyone else was that those three Hebrew boys were thrown into the fiery furnace, and yet they were not burned up because God kept them safe.

It’s because of the lousy testimony of Cafeteria Catholics that my dh is reluctant to join the Catholic Church.

 

[GandalfTheWhite]

I don’t think her kids need your pity. Sound to me that they will be well informed and able to make the right choices for them. [emphasis mine]

So, you think that teaching your kids to commit grave sin is making them well informed?

Right choices for them? Contraception is immoral, how can choosing it be ever a right choice? Once more stick to relativism in which everything can be good and evil and in which God’s word has no value.

 

[estesbob]

Quick call the police. i want to report a HIT AND RUN!

 

[archangel63]

Wow, I’m sorry for you! Truly! But you cannot “catch” Chlamydia, HPV, PID and many others from just kissing.

You’re wrong. Intra oral HPV warts and oral chlamydia happen. All your daughter would have to do is run into a guy who had oral sex with another infected girl who gave him the disease in his mouth (he could even just be a carrier yet not have symptoms). Although rare it does occur. Why take the risk for a few moments of pleasure? If you don’t believe me than Google it! People catch and spread HPV without ever getting warts or showing symptoms. Same with chlamydia. Trust me, I caught HPV from a partner of 8 years who never showed symptoms ever.

And Hepatitis comes in 5 varieties; A, B, C, D or E. A few of these can be spread from just a french kiss or drinking off an infected person’s glass of water. My ex-partner that gave me HPV came down with Hep B. He got very sick, infected me and luckily I cleared it out of my system with gamma globulin and injections of vaccine. You really don’t want to know about my experience with HPV. It was harrowing to say the least…I’ll just say 2 laser surgery’s in a very sensitive area that took 2 years to heal properly.

You’d be surprised to know all the STD’s (some that we never hear about) that are floating around out in the world’s populace that can be spread during “safe sex”.

 

[Bella3502]

Yep, I am aware that the world is full of Cafeteria Catholics that either are unaware of or just flat ignore the Church’s teachings on matters of faith and morals. Does that make them right? Does that make their choice to contracept OK? The “everyone else is doing it” argument didn’t hold up for me with my mom.

It was because they didn’t do what everyone else was that those three Hebrew boys were thrown into the fiery furnace, and yet they were not burned up because God kept them safe.

It’s because of the lousy testimony of Cafeteria Catholics that my dh is reluctant to join the Catholic Church.

I wonder if “real” Catholics get into Heaven faster than “Cafeteria” Catholics… HMMM

 

[CCM08]

You can have a commited relationship without a marriage certificate. Many Catholics have them.

When men tell this to women it’s simply stating, “I don’t love you (or I’m worried that you’ll divorce me and take my money so in short I don’t trust you) but I want to have sex.” It’s sad there are women out there foolish enough to buy it.

There’s no such thing as a committed relationship without marriage. The entire point of not getting married is to avoid committment and have a relationship that can be ended with few (if any) complications at any moment for any reason. If you were committed to a spouse you’d want the ability to provide them with medical insurance and other benefits only extended to legal spouses.

 

[LJN21]

I wonder if “real” Catholics get into Heaven faster than “Cafeteria” Catholics… HMMM

As a Catholic that follows the teaching of the Church as completely as I can as a human being I’m just hoping I make it to purgatory…

 

[whatevergirl]

I wonder if “real” Catholics get into Heaven faster than “Cafeteria” Catholics… HMMM

Well…we are all in line…

 

[Rach620]

When did ‘good parenting’ turn into an exercise of ‘objectively’ discussing all possible courses of action and then stepping back and allowing them to make their own decisions?

I think it was when relativism became the dominant moral framework. When silly things like ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ fell out of fashion and became just too ‘judgmental’.

Relativists just don’t make good parents. Kids need direction–that’s the whole point of parenting. Parenting is nothing less than setting a child on the path to heaven, and heaven can’t be reached by contracepting, aborting, and generally misunderstanding the whole point of human life and relationships. You have a greater responsibility for the salvation of your child than setting them adrift without a compass in regards to sexual morality.

And even if you don’t believe that their immortal souls are in danger by contracepting and aborting–can’t you see that both of these things harm women, men, and their relationships (married or otherwise)? Can’t you see the damage which they are doing in our culture which no longer values marriage, in which so many children are raised in broken families, where abuse, rape, and the objectification of women are prevalent? ‘Safe sex’ does not exist, especially when we’re talking about emotions.

I’m a 20 year old woman, engaged to be married in a little under two years to the love of my life, and we are both–and will remain–virgins until our wedding night. I know that I have been committed to chastity throughout my youth because of the strong example and teaching of my mother, who never shied away from discussing sex, contraception, or abortion, but who always did so with a firm view towards what is right and what is wrong. Without that experience, I know that I would have been completely lost–as many of my former classmates and some friends are–in our ‘sex ed’ culture with its message of consequence-free and commitment-less sex. I thank God every day for her