Telephone Call to Msgr. Guido Marini, Papal Master of Ceremonies

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All in good fun:

Secretary: Good morning, Msgr. Marini’s office.

Expert: Is he in?

Secretary: May I ask who is calling?

Expert: I’m an expert.

Secretary: Pardon me?

Expert: You heard me I’m an expert on the Mass!

Secretary: The Monsignor is in conference. May I have your name and the organization you represent?

**Expert: ** I need to talk to him so the Masses will be perfect when the Pope visits the United States. If he doesn’t receive my council the Masses will be defective.

Secretary: Your name and organization please? Your background?

Expert: Well I did read the GIRM and Redemptionis Sacramentum, I watch EWTN a lot and I do contribute to the Catholic Answers Forums quite a bit.

Secretary: How did you get this number?

Expert: I just need five minutes to outline the problems these Masses will have if the Monsignor will not listen to and follow my (name removed by moderator)ut. Only I can give such perfect (name removed by moderator)ut! If he listens to ME, the Masses will be perfect!

Secretary: The monsignor has an entire team of experts he consults on a daily basis. I think the Pope is in good hands.

Expert: You’re not listening! Only I can give him the advice necessary for a perfect Mass! Only my personal tastes are perfect! Will the Pope be wearing a maniple for instance?!?

Secretary: {click}
 
While I get the point of the joke, I think the sad thing is that the real problems with the Nationals Stadium Mass could have been avoided if we had kept all the American “experts” out of the planning.
 
Andreas_Hofer said:
While I get the point of the joke, I think the sad thing is that the real problems with the Nationals Stadium Mass could have been avoided if we had kept all the American “experts” out of the planning.
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Ok, I might be missing something. The Pope comes to the US, and instead of rejoicing in the attempts at showing brotherhood, many just look to see what they can find wrong with the ritual? Like God really cares???
 
thecoach said:
Ok, I might be missing something. The Pope comes to the US, and instead of rejoicing in the attempts at showing brotherhood, many just look to see what they can find wrong with the ritual? Like God really cares???
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I think that Jesus cares if three people who are, objectively speaking, in a state of public mortal sin (Chris Dodd, Nancy Pelosi, and John Kerry), receive Him under the appearance of bread. If they are subjectively in a state of mortal sin, not only do people think that supporting abortion is fine, but Jesus is being bound to someone who is spiritually dead.
 
thecoach said:
Ok, I might be missing something. The Pope comes to the US, and instead of rejoicing in the attempts at showing brotherhood, many just look to see what they can find wrong with the ritual? Like God really cares???
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Yeah.

To be blunt, I’m not so sure that God wasn’t thrilled with the Mass in DC. While some of the music was not my cup o’ tea, I do realize there are about 65M other Catholics in the USA and about 1.2B around the world that have differing tastes than my own.

I am CERTAIN many of these people (including myself) were greatly nourished by this Mass. I am also a bit taken aback by the number of non-Catholics who have told me how glorious this Mass was to them.
 
Spiller said:
Yeah.

To be blunt, I’m not so sure that God wasn’t thrilled with the Mass in DC. While some of the music was not my cup o’ tea, I do realize there are about 65M other Catholics in the USA and about 1.2B around the world that have differing tastes than my own.

I am CERTAIN many of these people (including myself) were greatly nourished by this Mass. I am also a bit taken aback by the number of non-Catholics who have told me how glorious this Mass was to them.
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Wow. So, are you suggesting that they understand what should be, what is correct, and what isn’t about the Mass which made it “glorious…to them”…??

If they do, what are those things and when will they become Catholic?

If they don’t, then perhaps the “redeeming” value to them was not the Mass itself, but the presence of the Pope.

At least that is a start but will you spend anytime with these number of non-Catholics describing the Real Presence, and the need for reverence for the Eucharist.??

.
 
:rotfl:

How about this:

**Expert: **Will all the songs be out of the Adoremus hymnal because I only use the Adoremus hymnal.
 
Saint_Gemma said:
I think that Jesus cares if three people who are, objectively speaking, in a state of public mortal sin (Chris Dodd, Nancy Pelosi, and John Kerry), receive Him under the appearance of bread. If they are subjectively in a state of mortal sin, not only do people think that supporting abortion is fine, but Jesus is being bound to someone who is spiritually dead.
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Too bad that was not what was being discussed here.
 
Spiller said:
Yeah.

To be blunt, I’m not so sure that God wasn’t thrilled with the Mass in DC. While some of the music was not my cup o’ tea, I do realize there are about 65M other Catholics in the USA and about 1.2B around the world that have differing tastes than my own.

I am CERTAIN many of these people (including myself) were greatly nourished by this Mass. I am also a bit taken aback by the number of non-Catholics who have told me how glorious this Mass was to them.
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Yeah, Spiller. But you ‘n’ me by ourselves is a MAJORITY!
 
thecoach said:
Too bad that was not what was being discussed here.
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:confused: I do not understand. How is something that happened at a papal Mass in the United States of America not relevant in a discussion of the papal Mass in the United States of America?
 
ProVobis said:
Is this the way Christ wants His Church run?
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Lighten up, Pro. This thread is a bit of self-deprecatory humor about the flak that’s been thrown at the Washington Mass. In case you hadn’t noticed. 🙂
 
thecoach said:
Ok, I might be missing something. The Pope comes to the US, and instead of rejoicing in the attempts at showing brotherhood, many just look to see what they can find wrong with the ritual? Like God really cares???
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No one on this forum complained about the beautiful prayer service that was held the night before last. But once you get a Mass going, watch out. Not good.
 
Saint_Gemma said:
:confused: I do not understand. How is something that happened at a papal Mass in the United States of America not relevant in a discussion of the papal Mass in the United States of America?
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Because this is a wry little thread poking fun at liturgical pundits; it is not about doctrinally dissident politicians and the scandal they bring.
 
thecoach said:
Ok, I might be missing something. The Pope comes to the US, and instead of rejoicing in the attempts at showing brotherhood, many just look to see what they can find wrong with the ritual? Like God really cares???
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One of the major themes of Benedict’s pontificate has been a restoration of the liturgy along the lines of authentic Catholic principles, naturally extending this from his liturgical writings as Cdl. Ratzinger. When he showed up in the US, the planners for that Mass (the blame seems mostly to fall on the Abp. Wuerl’s choice for music director) executed a gigantic “Up yours!” regarding the pope’s liturgical philosophy. And they essentially did it in my name.

It’s not a matter of taste. It’s about listening to the pope teach you what constitutes authentically liturgically music. As a cardinal he told us what music is ideal (i.e. the music the Church has always told us is ideal - Gregorian chant) and also what music is completely inappropriate (from which group the vast majority of the pieces chosen for the D.C. Mass were taken). What you’re basically saying is “Why not rejoice that, while blatantly disregarding Benedict’s desires for the liturgy, the musicians at least had good though thoroughly misguided intentions?” I don’t see that as a cause for rejoicing.
 
I thought Msgr. Marini had been replaced as the Pope’s master of liturgical liturgical planing quite some time ago. :confused:
 
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