Telling the priest he made a mistake

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floresco

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At the place I attend Mass most often, we have a wonderful priest who has recently learned to celebrate the EF Mass. I like and admire this priest a lot, but I notice occasional minor mistakes. That is only to be expected, since he is still new to saying this form of Mass. I am undecided about whether I should point these out to him. On the one hand, getting feedback will help him to improve. On the other hand, I am concerned about discouraging him.

Here is an example. Yesterday he left out an “alleluia” that should have been inserted because it is Easter Season. Obviously this is quite minor, but if I were in his position I would want to do every detail correctly.

Do people have experiences or ideas about this?
 
Honestly, if it’s minor I wouldn’t bother the guy if he’s still getting used to it. I’d rather just try to enjoy the Mass that’s being offered. I’m sure with experience he’ll iron out the wrinkles.
 
floresco said:
At the place I attend Mass most often, we have a wonderful priest who has recently learned to celebrate the EF Mass. I like and admire this priest a lot, but I notice occasional minor mistakes. That is only to be expected, since he is still new to saying this form of Mass. I am undecided about whether I should point these out to him. On the one hand, getting feedback will help him to improve. On the other hand, I am concerned about discouraging him.

Here is an example. Yesterday he left out an “alleluia” that should have been inserted because it is Easter Season. Obviously this is quite minor, but if I were in his position I would want to do every detail correctly.

Do people have experiences or ideas about this?
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Do you know him at all? I would get to know him as a person before you start correcting very minor errors.
 
In a similar position, I didn’t say anything. It didn’t bother me. I was so happy he was learning the old Mass and confident that he wished to say it perfectly (in other words, that he would correct himself eventually), that it never crossed my mind to tell him.
 
Baelor said:
Do you know him at all? I would get to know him as a person before you start correcting very minor errors.
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He has been training my son as an altar server, so this has involved a fair bit of talking between us.
 
floresco said:
He has been training my son as an altar server, so this has involved a fair bit of talking between us.
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If you can mention it in the context of appreciation of his efforts and a desire that he succeeds, go ahead.
 
Baelor said:
If you can mention it in the context of appreciation of his efforts and a desire that he succeeds, go ahead.
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That makes sense. One of the basic guidelines for gving constructive criticism is to sandwich it between two positive comments.
 
I wouldn’t say anything. He might not even realize he omitted it, and it really isn’t a big deal. You may make him nervous and put stress on him if you say something to him about his omission - knowing he has someone listening to and watching him so closely.
 
I think I’d deal with it the same way I do priests who celebrate the ordinary form. I know a a retired priest in his mid 80s who forgot to do the creed in the proper place and did it after the prayers of the faithful. I know this was unintended on his part and he forgot because he said so right before he led us in saying the Creed. I mean the had the minor mistakes I’ve seen from time to time were malicious and intentional I would probably have a word with the priest, and may even pen a letter to the bishop to let him know what was going on. However, and this is not to say that some priests intentionally abuse the liturgy because unfortunately there are some who probably do, I have fortunately never encountered a priest who intentionally butchered the liturgy, and as such I let it slide.

Same for the Tridentine Mass. I too know a priest who had to learn to do the Tridentine form and he made mistakes, but they were not intentional and were very very minor. So in short, if you have a priest who is intentionally butchering the Mass in any form have a word. If the guy is making minor mistakes that are clearly not intentional then say nothing and pray for the guy and encourage him.
 
Lormar said:
I wouldn’t say anything. He might not even realize he omitted it, and it really isn’t a big deal.
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I am fairly sure he doesn’t realize he did it. But how will he learn if nobody tells him?
Lormar said:
You may make him nervous and put stress on him if you say something to him about his omission - knowing he has someone listening to and watching him so closely.
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This is exactly the problem. It could affect him that way or it might not. He might be the sort of person who would really appreciate being told. There is so much individual variation around this sort of thing.
 
floresco said:
I am fairly sure he doesn’t realize he did it. But how will he learn if nobody tells him?

This is exactly the problem. It could affect him that way or it might not. He might be the sort of person who would really appreciate being told. There is so much individual variation around this sort of thing.
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But how will he learn if nobody tells him?
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Did he ask you to watch him and correct him? I really don’t think you will be encouraging him if he knows you are sitting there in the pew watching his every move and listening to his every word.

He omitted one word. Not exactly the end of the world. If he continues making mistakes, then I would say something.
 
Use the British method for discerning weather to say something…

Once is chance

Twice coincidence

Three times is a bloody act of war! 😃 Then you say something about it.

😉
 
JerryZ said:
Use the British method for discerning weather to say something…

Once is chance

Twice coincidence

Three times is a bloody act of war! 😃 Then you say something about it.

😉
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Yes, do not do it unless it occurs regularly – there are always blips.
 
I’ve heard it said that one of the biggest reasons priests hesitate to say the EF Mass is that they fear being nit-picked to death over every minor foible.

I would also be afraid about discouraging him. Let it go. Give thanks to God that he is willing to learn this form of the Mass and celebrate it for you.
 
Joe_5859 said:
I’ve heard it said that one of the biggest reasons priests hesitate to say the EF Mass is that they fear being nit-picked to death over every minor foible.

I would also be afraid about discouraging him. Let it go. Give thanks to God that he is willing to learn this form of the Mass and celebrate it for you.
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I’ve heard that too. I am very thankful for this priest and not simply because he says this Mass. He is a holy faithful priest.
 
I would also add that I would absolutely want to be told if I were doing something wrong consistently.
 
The point of this thread is not being picky about minor mistakes. It is about what is the best way to help priests who have not had much experience with the EF.
 
One way of highlighting an area in which you believe a mistake is being made - without nitpicking - could be to respectfully ask a question about that part of the mass? As in Father, I’ve noticed in the past that sometimes there is an alleluia said at this point, sometimes not…is that because of the liturgical season or ???

As long as it’s being asked with respect and curiosity, I’ve found a question can either a) cause the person to become aware of their mistake and self-correct it, or b) can actually lead me to discover the error was my own and I was mistaken about the matter. (Haven’t spoken to a priest about a liturgical situation, but have run into this in everyday life situations.)
 
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