Telling the priest in confession

  • Thread starter Thread starter Kahlesson
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
K

Kahlesson

Guest
Hello everyone,

I am an 18-year-old male and I came back to the catholic Church for about two to three months now by my first confession. I have had about fife more confessions since. Everytime I go to confession I confess the sin of sexual impure acts (I am addicted and it is very difficult to break free). I also have same sex attractions. I have not told my priest about this. I don’t know if I should tell him or not. A part of me wants to, but the other part is afraid and ashamed. I am going to confession again on Saturday. Do you think it is a good idea to tell the priest about my ssa or not?

Thank you,
 
Kahlesson said:
Hello everyone,

I am an 18-year-old male and I came back to the catholic Church for about two to three months now by my first confession. I have had about fife more confessions since. Everytime I go to confession I confess the sin of sexual impure acts (I am addicted and it is very difficult to break free). I also have same sex attractions. I have not told my priest about this. I don’t know if I should tell him or not. A part of me wants to, but the other part is afraid and ashamed. I am going to confession again on Saturday. Do you think it is a good idea to tell the priest about my ssa or not?

Thank you,
Click to expand...
Same sex attraction, while disordered, is not a sin in itself. If you went further and had a sexual relationship with another male that would be a sin of grave matter and would have to be confessed.
 
Quite a few priests have told me over the years that ‘Nothing’ ever shocks them and that they have heard it all before! Dont be ashamed! Just tell the priest everything you want. He will help and guide you. Remember, God speaks through the priest. God wants you to ask for mercy and help.

God bless you
 
Yes, although just the SSA is not a sin, but acting on it is, it may help to confess these feelings to your priest. If nothing else it would ease a burden on your mind. I think no matter how hard it is to confess a sin, no matter how embarrassing it is, i always feel such a relief after confession. Especially if you have a priest who takes time with you in confession. I had one priest even give me a special blessing after confession once because he felt i needed it.
 
Is your SSA a trigger to your sin? Do you have one priest that you use as a confessor? Do you think that he can better help you over come this if he knew?

Do not feel ashamed of yourself. It is part of you, and you are worthy of God’s love, because he made you :). You have to own your SSA, though, before you can overcome it, or else it will control you.

Part of owning it may be to let it out to your confessor, if you trust him.

Peace
 
dee_burk said:
Yes, although just the SSA is not a sin, but acting on it is, it may help to confess these feelings to your priest. If nothing else it would ease a burden on your mind.
Click to expand...
I quite agree with this.

I would also add something else, that’s somewhat personal.

I have an inclination towards anger and towards looking down on others and being extremely judgmental of them Sometimes, this inclination manifests itself simply as thought – which I have no control over – and sometimes, as actual behavior.

Although this inclination does not always result in my committing sin, I find it helpful to mention it in Confession anyway, because I thereby open up my heart to receive grace from God, and also to develop humility.

So it is with same-sex attraction. Having an inclination towards this behavior is not a sin, however, it **is **a source of temptation, and therefore, we should ask God for the strength to be able to stand firm in the face of such temptation. One way to accomplish this is through Confession.

Father, I struggle against SSA, and although I do not think having SSA is itself sinful, I nonetheless bring it before the Lord in this Sacrament.

Also, I’m going to be very blunt and say something to you: feeling **shame **to mention something in Confession is a sign of two things: (1) God’s grace at work in your life, since you feel a need for Confession in the first place; and (2) an attack from the enemy, who is jealous of the graces you will receive if you make a worthy Confession.

Be not afraid! Here is a website to look into, to help you with regard to SSA: couragerc.org/

Here are some episodes of Catholic Answers Live that I believe you should listen to: catholic.com/search/content/joseph%20nicolosi?filters=type%3Aradio_show
 
Telling the priest in Confession about your SSA may help him better counsel you. You you are talking with God through the priest and God loves all his children. After all, he made each and every one of us.

Peace

Boswell
Kahlesson said:
Hello everyone,

I am an 18-year-old male and I came back to the catholic Church for about two to three months now by my first confession. I have had about fife more confessions since. Everytime I go to confession I confess the sin of sexual impure acts (I am addicted and it is very difficult to break free). I also have same sex attractions. I have not told my priest about this. I don’t know if I should tell him or not. A part of me wants to, but the other part is afraid and ashamed. I am going to confession again on Saturday. Do you think it is a good idea to tell the priest about my ssa or not?

Thank you,
Click to expand...
 
Don’t be ashamed of having same-sex attraction; you didn’t choose it, and just because the attraction is disordered does not mean that you are disordered as a person. To answer your question, yes, I would tell your confessor, for the simple reason that it may help him better counsel you. You don’t need to be afraid; I highly doubt that he’ll judge you for it- if anything, I think he would be immensely grateful to know that someone with your struggles is working so hard to be holy.

Trust me that the longer you keep this a secret, especially a secret from your priest, the more the devil will try to use it against you and make you believe things about yourself that aren’t true. Satan likes to drag those who are trying to live virtuously down into despair, when despair is the absolute last thing God wants for us. I myself suffer from scrupulosity; for the longest time I thought that I was a despicable human being, until I told my confessor and he reminded me that the root of scrupulosity is a turning inward in continuous negative conversation with oneself. Having that calm voice from outside myself really helped quiet the inner demons to some extent, and it’s definitely made my life a lot easier. Remember that the priest is there to help you, not to condemn you, so don’t be afraid to be honest with him; it takes a huge weight off your shoulders.

Above all, remember that you are God’s beloved child, whatever the difficulties you face. I’ll be praying for you, my brother. May God bless you.

-OneSmallFlower
 
Thank you all for your kind replies. My confession is sheduled in two hours and I will tell the priest.
 
God bless you…

Remember, forgiveness starts from the moment you repent. SSA may not be sinful, but definitely its against God’s law… As said by others, confess everything and don’t hold back anything and fight hard to avoid falling back.

Read holy books and pray rosary everyday.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top