Terrible Situation: Venting and Need Advice

[jmjZelie]

Before you call child services I think it is time to visit your mother and your sister. If these kids mean anything to you then make the trip. Find a way. See with your own eyes and pray to God on what to do. You should do this quickly. And why is your mother who is disabled and poor taking the whole of the responsibility. Doesn’t your sister’s ex have family? Don’t these grandparents want a part of the baby boy’s life?

My whole family mean a lot to me, especially my niece and nephew. But it is absolutely impossible for me to travel thousands of miles to them right now. I have, however, spoken to someone who has promised she will act as my eyes on the ground there. She is someone close to me who lives in the same city as my sister.
My mother adopted my niece years ago and is raising her as a daughter. She also helps with child care for my nephew, the baby. And yes, the father of the baby and his family want the baby in their lives and are taking steps to secure that for the baby.

 

[nodito]

So I cannot take any action, let alone drastic measures, on just the word of my mother alone.

jmZelie,

It is good that you have reflected and prayed about this and I hope you will continue to do so. I just wanted to add a little comment on your post. It probably feels like a huge and drastic measure calling CPS, but it doesn’t need to be. I felt the same way calling 911 once because I wasn’t sure that it was an emergency, or even a problem, but I was relieved when they sent a police officer out to just check on the situation. And even though everything was fine, I feel good knowing that everyone involved (me, the concerned passerby; and the police) did their jobs.

Child Protective Services are in place to protect children. Your submitting a report of suspected neglect does not haunt this family forever, unless there really is a problem in which case it’s important that it be on record.

Think about it a bit more, but if you do decide to call, it’s perfectly acceptable to call and say something like, “I’m worried about my niece. I live across the country and haven’t seen her in several years but friends and family tell me that she is living in squalor and suffering from neglect. I’m really nervous about calling you, but I wonder if it wouldn’t be possible for someone to stop in to check to see if there’s any merit to these reports.”

God bless.