The bigger person

[ela2]

In my experience nothing will work because it is you as 1 person against everyone else. And a lot of people in these situations, silently agree with you but side with the others because they know it is a loosing battle and they don’t want to be the target and are relieved everyone is picking on you. Lots of people prefer to be in these bad situations than

Angie

That’s interesting but the situation is more like the story ‘the emperor’s new clothes’. Where everyone knows that the emperor is naked but doesn’t want to be the one pointing it out. Then a small child points out and shouts that the emperor is naked and so everyone can’t help but agree… Here everyone knows that the habits are not nice, that it is annoying, that it is hard to be around, etc. but no one wants to be the one who says it and so plays along. I can’t and don’t want to play along, at the same time, saying that such habits are not nice has worked only for a few weeks. So when things are blatantly forgotten or ignored and once again those previous habits are resumed, what do you do. Do you once again go through that difficult confrontation of trying to explain in child like terms that their habits are annoying and hurtful or do you just try to live with it in a dignified manner? If the latter, then how do you do it?

 

[ela2]

Thank you this helps.

What I learned to do was to pray for people while they were saying hurtful things and to remind myself of the times that I, myself was thoughtless. I would say (to myself) a prayer something like this:

“Dear Jesus, right now this person is hurting my feelings and being rude. Remind me of the times in my life that I was rude and thoughtless too, and how you have always loved me and been patient with me. Jesus please help me to love this person in front of me, right now and help me to be more like you.”

Thank you, this is what I shall try.

 

[kate_jackson]

Thank you, this is what I shall try.

Me too