My Dear Friend,
Humility makes Hell tremble with fear, docility scares the hell out of hell. Calm down and ask Our Lady, the Queen of Peace to direct your gaze towards Her, only look at Her. You are like Peter who looked at the storm and started to sink…keep your eyes on Jesus and Mary. It is like walking a tightrope above a pool of crocodiles, above a volcano, above the open jaws of hell, with your eyes on your Mother, you won’t pay any undue attention to the snarling. Satan is tied to a post like a pitbull. He cannot get any closer unless you approach him out of fascination and fear of your own capacity for evil and his for seducing you. Don’t look at him, look at the One he is trying to distract you from. Satan knows he’s about to lose his grasp, so like all the Father of abusers and bullies that he is, he barks as much as possible to prevent from taking the last step to freedom, you see?
I prayed a deliverance and exorcism prayer as taken from the Roman Ritual for you(like the one posted). Be not afraid, Satan is afraid of what your humility and continuous conversion will do to him, of what the New Eve who crushes the Head of the serpent will do with you against him. Your Mother Mary, is calling you, what more do you need?Don’t stare at the wolf growling at you. Walk humbly like a little lamb, with joy, with confidence into the confessional, and hear him howl that he lost another soul to the Immaculate One. Take courage, the Master is calling you, He knows your weakness and does not expect you to walk out of the Confessional a perfect saint, just an angel in training on the way to earning their wings. You’ll be back for more Jesus Treatments in the Divine Mercy clinic. If anything, go out of mercy for Mercy, because nothing hurts Jesus more than to mistrust His great love for you. He only wants your good.
He will not intimidate you or lay a guilt trip on you. Your confession will give Him more joy than you can imagine. You have the power to heal Jesus’ wounds, He has the power to heal yours-when both come together in that kiss of grace, you will be at peace and never afraid again of seeing your own spiritual misery. The more miserable you are, the more you have right to His Mercy. You are first on His list because you need Him the most.
As a Priest, I feel like a physician that could cure you but I am dying with desire to heal you because you will not come to me. I would love to give you a Jesus-Shot and vaccinate you, then help you build up your spiritual hygiene so as not to get so sick again. Jesus loves you very much for your honesty and Mary is nearby to bring you to Him.
Fr. Dominic