The long road home

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I wasn’t sure where to put this, but this board seems the best fit.

I took the first real step yesterday in returning to communion with the Church. I called and made an appointment to meet with the parish priest to discuss what I need to do. I’ll meet with him Tuesday morning.

I’m approaching this with considerable trepidation. Over the past several days I’ve been making what I’ve come to call a profound examination of conscience and doing so in writing. I’ve 20 years of sins to confess and a great many of them are grave mortal sins. I wrote yesterday that I hope I’m given a stiff penance while at the same time fearing getting a stiff penance. I guess it’s a case of knowing what I deserve but desiring mercy.

The current circumstances of my life will also make this process more complicated. I have a daughter born out of wedlock in my early 20’s as well as a wife married in a civil ceremony with whom I have three sons. My wife was baptized in the Anglican church as an infant but not raised Christian. None of my children are baptized.

While my wife isn’t opposing me in this decision, she’s not entirely supportive either. Given the religion hopping I’ve done while seeking to avoid acknowledging the truth of the Catholic Church, I can’t say I blame her. Our marriage hasn’t exactly been at its strongest lately.

I guess all I’m really doing here is talking through my aprehensions. I’m feeling like the prodigal son who has really let his parents down by ignoring everything they taught him for twenty years, making a real mess of his life in the process. What I deserve is to get kicked to the curb but what I’ll get is my parents’ loving embrace. I yearn for that embrace yet am shamed by what I’ve done.

I’m interested in other reverts’ experiences as they returned to the Church.
 
The Gospel says “There is more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents…”

I can’t share about leaving and coming back, but can say welcome back and many blessings for you and your family throughout this difficult process.
 
welcome home

from your first confession graces will begin to pour upon you and your family that will make marvelous changes possible, if you cooperate with Christ’s grace as you have begun to do, but it will happen in God’s time. Consecrate your family to Him and let him work in them, too. The priest will guide on on what steps are necessary regarding your marriage. We are so glad you have come home, welcome, we will all be praying for you.
 
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Lapsed:
I wrote yesterday that I hope I’m given a stiff penance while at the same time fearing getting a stiff penance. I guess it’s a case of knowing what I deserve but desiring mercy.
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If you are contrite (and it sounds like you are), your sins are completely forgiven when the priest absolves you. A stiff penance does not make you “more forgiven.” It is a token on your part to show sorrow. Whatever penance the priest gives you, you are always free to do more, but it’s not necessary. God is infinite in His mercy.
 
I returned after nearly fifty years to the church; I was baptized Catholic but no one ever mentioned it to me, and I was raised Protestant. I think one always feels sad over the harm we’ve done to others in ignorance and not-so-ignorance. I was surprised at what a light penance I received after my first Reconciliation. The feeling of relief is tremendous!
The thing that I still feel saddest about is that I never baptised my oldest son.
Congratulations on your return. Your family will follow you as they see your joy and devotion.
 
Welcome Home!!! Yes the angels in heaven are singing joyfully. Your meeting with your priest should be a joyous occasion, don’t worry and know you are always welcome.
 
I’m a revert… and sooooo glad I did!!! After my first born child, I emailed the local priest, said I want to come to Confession, and he said to meet him after Mass (we had never face to face met before this). I went to mass… told him “Bless me Father for I have sinned, it’s been xx years since my last confession” and he interrupts me and tells me “Give me the big ones, we’ll work through the rest in counseling.” And boy, the sheer JOY of being back! And the heartache of learning I can’t recieve communion because my marriage hadn’t been convalidated. But I have to admit, that one year of examining my conscious, studying, praying and sacrificing was well worth it to be able to return to our beloved Church and lemme tell ya… I DANCED and cried my way to communion after my marriage was convalidated. I felt Christ calling to me that day and I felt my heart going “I’m coming Lord! I’m coming!” And as soon as I took communion, I felt Him tell my heart “Welcome home. I’m soooo happy you’re here.”

Pray, pray, pray for your next moves. Pray even harder for your spouse. Take one step at a time as there will be roadblocks thrown in your path to divert you. And give thanks to the Holy Spirit for never letting you go. I know I’m thankful the HS never let you go… so WELCOME HOME!!! 😃
 
Welcome Home.
You may be wondering lot’s of things. What ifs…
When I came back to the Church it meant a lot of changes, but all things are possible to God. Even miracles -like your conversion.
God bless you and yours.
 
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Viki59:
I returned after nearly fifty years to the church; I was baptized Catholic but no one ever mentioned it to me, and I was raised Protestant. I think one always feels sad over the harm we’ve done to others in ignorance and not-so-ignorance. I was surprised at what a light penance I received after my first Reconciliation. The feeling of relief is tremendous!
The thing that I still feel saddest about is that I never baptised my oldest son.
Congratulations on your return. Your family will follow you as they see your joy and devotion.
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I returned several months ago after being away almost as long as you. I never doubted the truths of Catholicism. I had a wonderful Catholic education back when there were still nuns in schools (they were so good to me) and for that reason I believe my sins against the Church were even worse.

I finally got the courage to call the parish where I grew up and got an appointment to see the pastor. He was wonderful, easy to talk to and when he absolved me of my sins and welcomed me back, I cried. Now when I receive the Eucharist, I almost cry again. God is merciful and forgiving. I know you will find the peace I have found.
 
Thank you everyone for your prayers and encouragement. I need them both. I want to add that the people here have been a big part of this process for me. I came to these boards thinking about returning to the Church and my participation here was a major factor in tipping my internal scales enough to make me act instead of just think.

I was raised in the Church, confirmed when I was 13. The hardest thing ahead of me I think will be having to wait to receive communion until the matters around my marriage are resolved. This temporal consequence of my sins will be the difficult part of any penance I receive.

Ah well, I have no one to blame but myself. I certainly knew better. 🙂
 
Hi

Welcome Home :tiphat: I will Pray for you also :gopray2: May God Bless You and Yours, and I will also pray for your wife, as i know how hard that all is to deal with coming into the Church. I am not a ‘revert’ but a convert - my wife was/is less than thrilled. :bigyikes:

God loves us - that is the most important thing…everything else comes second, and He is Always in control of Everything 👍

Peace

John
 
It’s wonderful that you’re coming back. Give your wife some time and pray for her. With your “religion hopping” she may not believe that your desire to return to the Church will stick. If you make some strong moves in that direction, like meeting with a priest, getting back to confession, maybe that will help her see that this is permanent. Is she opposed to the idea of the Catholic Church or just unsure about what you’re doing?

I’m a bit of a revert–I never really left, but didn’t really understand my faith. I hadn’t been to confession in a number of years, but when I finally went a few months ago, my priest talked to me about the prodigal son story; I’d never really understood that before either. We’re all sinners, we all deserve a kick in the pants, but God’s above all that fortunately and wants us to come home. He’s calling you now, come home and be welcomed!!

Good luck to you!
 
Welcome back and God bless you !!!

:blessyou:

Praying for you, :gopray2:

~~ the phoenix
 
Praise God!! What a terrific way to begin a new year. This is great news, welcome home.
I pray every day for some of my family members that they will return to the Church.
It’s only natural that you have some anxiety. Just remember, when you enter into the sacrament of Reconciliation you are entering into an encounter with our merciful Lord.
 
Thanks again everyone for your prayers and encouragement.

I met with Father Derek this morning. What a joyful meeting it was! I think he was smiling more than I was in the end over this prodigal son’s return home. As we were walking out of the room we met in he slapped me on the back, saying, “I’m so happy!” and laughing.

After meeting with my pastor (been a long time since I could say that), I spent some time in the sanctuary, kneeling prayer before the Tabernacle. No one else was there, just me and Jesus.

The Sacrament of Reconciliation is such a wonderful gift from God. The peace it brings is profound. I’ve had trouble sleeping since I started thinking of returning to the Church as my heart and mind have dwelt on my sins, but not today. I slept soundly and deeply, back in the arms of my Saviour.

Now comes the really hard part. Someone, I’m not sure who, once said that dying for God is easy; it’s living for Him that’s difficult.
 
Lapsed,
Along with the others here, I commend you for having the courage to heed Christ’s invitation for you to return to His family. Know that His grace is working in you in a very powerful way. You didn’t get this far by yourself…and as you journey through the “hard part”, know also that God didn’t bring you this far without giving you the grace to overcome whatever obstacles beset you.

I, like you, was away from the Church for a very long time. For each “yes” I’ve given to Our Lord, He has given me what I’ve needed to face the next obstacle. And surprised me in the process! I will never understand fully in this life how the Holy Spirit works, but He does. I now have a spouse, a daughter, and a son-in-law who have come home to the Church as well, and continue to pray that the rest of my family will find the joy of finding Christ through the sacraments of our Church. In the end, it will happen as God wills it. For me, its doing my best to come closer to Our Lord and to trust in His mercy. I give them to Christ and know that it will be in His time. I rejoice in your homecoming! May Our Lord richly bless you!
 
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Lapsed:
Thanks again everyone for your prayers and encouragement.

I met with Father Derek this morning. What a joyful meeting it was! I think he was smiling more than I was in the end over this prodigal son’s return home. As we were walking out of the room we met in he slapped me on the back, saying, “I’m so happy!” and laughing.

After meeting with my pastor (been a long time since I could say that), I spent some time in the sanctuary, kneeling prayer before the Tabernacle. No one else was there, just me and Jesus.

The Sacrament of Reconciliation is such a wonderful gift from God. The peace it brings is profound. I’ve had trouble sleeping since I started thinking of returning to the Church as my heart and mind have dwelt on my sins, but not today. I slept soundly and deeply, back in the arms of my Saviour.

Now comes the really hard part. Someone, I’m not sure who, once said that dying for God is easy; it’s living for Him that’s difficult.
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I just read your beautiful post and I admit I’ve got a big lump in my throat. Glory to God!!! :bowdown2: I am rejoicing with you, my brutha!!!

Don’t worry about your walk-- “perfect love casteth out fear”! Just take one step at a time. The Holy Spirit is with you, guiding and directing you Heavenward! ❤️

:blessyou:

I’m SO happy for you!!! :dancing:

In Him,
Photini ><>
 
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