The Man Should Lead the Prayer

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I’ve visited a number of traditional parishes and I’ve noticed something interesting at not all, but most places I’ve visited.

In social situations, like for example, a group of parishioners going out to grab a bite to eat, if a group has 7 women and one man, everyone will defer to the man when it comes to praying before the meal.

I have noticed the same at meetings where someone prays to start the meeting. Everyone waits for the man to start.

Is this coincidence or is that how things are?

I’m still learning Catholic customs, especially in traditional circles, so I’m curious if this is a traditional Catholic custom.

Please… no debate about the use of the word “traditional” as a label.

Thank you. 🙂
 
TrueLight said:
I’ve visited a number of traditional parishes and I’ve noticed something interesting at not all, but most places I’ve visited.

In social situations, like for example, a group of parishioners going out to grab a bite to eat, if a group has 7 women and one man, everyone will defer to the man when it comes to praying before the meal.

I have noticed the same at meetings where someone prays to start the meeting. Everyone waits for the man to start.

Is this coincidence or is that how things are?

I’m still learning Catholic customs, especially in traditional circles, so I’m curious if this is a traditional Catholic custom.

Please… no debate about the use of the word “traditional” as a label.

Thank you. 🙂
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I don’t know that it’s Catholic…I was raised Protestant and the man always prayed, we waited then and do now wait for the man to lead. Personally, I prefer it that way.
 
It’s not custom as far as I know. Though I feel it stems from the fact that men are deacons and priests and still wield a significant amount of power in the Church. Thus, men are looked to for leadership roles many times, even if they are lay and the leadership role is just something like a prayer before meals. I’m sure it would be different if the group was of another religion.
 
Not to be snarfy about it, but what if none of them steps up to the plate and leads the prayer? I’ve seen that happen, too.
 
odile53 said:
Not to be snarfy about it, but what if none of them steps up to the plate and leads the prayer? I’ve seen that happen, too.
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In that case, I’ve seen someone say, “So and so, would you like to pray?”

So I have been in a similar situation with a couple of Catholic groups, whose members don’t identify as traditional or traditionalist and I’ve seen women volunteer to pray or be asked to pray.

So I was wondering if this is a traditional Catholic thing.
 
In many traditional Catholic families there is more of a male as the spiritual head so in situations where there is a man around he will lead prayer generally speaking. However, that is not to say there is anything wrong with women leading prayer in situations like you have mentioned (going out to eat, etc.) I would even argue that there is nothing wrong with women leading prayer services as there are several documents that allow them to do this. The line is in Sacraments (except for Baptism in case of emergency) which are reserved for the Ordained which would fall to the men of course because only men can be ordained. Other roles which fall to the laity have nothing to do with male and female they are strictly lay or clerical. There is no such thing in the Catholic faith in documents as male laity or female laity (well maybe a couple exceptions but for the most part very few.)
 
In my family, which has had strong matriarchial (spelling) ties I always remember the man of the house always leading the prayers. I think that is usually relies on a figure of strong character. Not toe be chauvanistic, it is usually the man who leads the family (most likely with the consent and direction of his wife). However, it family duties are usually shared but directed by who is the better suited for a particular role.

I look at prayers as a form of protection for the family. However, religious education of the children is usually under the control and direction of the wife. But family prayer is usually led by the man of the house.
 
Last Friday evening we were at the parish “soup supper” prior to Stations of the Cross. Because of the weather, I was the only adult male present. (only about 10 ladies were there and a few kids). They all looked to me to lead the prayer of thanksgiving before eating.

I believe it is a tradition that is rooted in the Bible. (but I can’t remember where)
 
No, Mark, we don’t melt. Many men work out in the forest as loggers and in inclement weather it takes longer to get out and to church. Most of our women folk can get to church earlier, not all, but most. Many work out in town or are at home Moms. Hence closer to church.

I know, everyone in Chicago thinks the world ends at the Mississippi River. 😃
 
corsair said:
Last Friday evening we were at the parish “soup supper” prior to Stations of the Cross. Because of the weather, I was the only adult male present. (only about 10 ladies were there and a few kids). They all looked to me to lead the prayer of thanksgiving before eating.

I believe it is a tradition that is rooted in the Bible. (but I can’t remember where)
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Every man used to be priest over his own house.

Remember the original passover in Egypt, when God struck down the first born male. Each houshold was to sacrifice a lamb. Only priests offer sacrifice, and that fact that the head of each household offered a lamb as sacrifice shows how each male head of houshold was the priest of his own house.

The priestood of all men was taken away at Sinai when Israel worshipped the golden calf. Only the tribe of Levi were faithful. Only the Levites did not worship the calf, so God gave the priesthood to the Levites, and hence the start of the Levitical priesthood.

But before the golden calf was worshipped, every man was priest of his own house.

-Tim-
 
TimothyH said:
But before the golden calf was worshipped, every man was priest of his own house.

-Tim-
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Right. I get that.

Is that also the reason why folks tend to defer to men to pray? Because they are priests of their houses?
 
TimothyH said:
Every man used to be priest over his own house.

Remember the original passover in Egypt, when God struck down the first born male. Each houshold was to sacrifice a lamb. Only priests offer sacrifice, and that fact that the head of each household offered a lamb as sacrifice shows how each male head of houshold was the priest of his own house.

The priestood of all men was taken away at Sinai when Israel worshipped the golden calf. Only the tribe of Levi were faithful. Only the Levites did not worship the calf, so God gave the priesthood to the Levites, and hence the start of the Levitical priesthood.

But before the golden calf was worshipped, every man was priest of his own house.

-Tim-
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Great post Tim!:thumbsup:And I agree with it all!
I have no problem and actually expect the man in a gathering to take over the prayer,
it seems so natural!👍 I have never thought of it,
but your explanation makes so much sense!
Thanks for the post!

Blessings,
Pax,

Megan:highprayer:
 
The first thing every morning I give thanks for the day and the blessings that will come. The last thing at night my family gives thanks for all that has happened. With the kids gone is is just my wife and I but still we pray and hope that our kids have followed what we started. I hope we taught our kids by example and each one of them comes back now and then for grounding. They have their own lives and we tried to teach by example and my son tries to continue but as we all have started out on our own there is usally a power struggle but more and more I see a deference creeping into their lives that is heartening to behold. Like a lesson learned that is going onto the next generation. I’ve tried to teach that the better person is in charge of endeavors and roles are not static.

There has to be a leader. That’s something that is not learned except by trial. one partner is better at earning and the other partner is better at paying bills. Throughout Christianity it seems that men have always led in prayer, yet each has a role to be played ant that is important., TimothyH your answer was both thoughtful and reflective I thank you for it. But there was a basic grounding that brought about the Levites to the forefront that was grounded in conviction.
 
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